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Alpha Dude
03-05-2010, 03:21 PM
Asalamu alaykum,

Imagine you are in your early thirties, have a lovely wife and 2 young daughters. You are doing well financially, being the boss of your own company. You have multiple cars and live in a beautiful home. Your life is comfortable in every way. You have warmth and love in your house. There is always an atmosphere of serenity and peace. You love your parents, your family, your in-laws and they all love you back.

You are good on your deen as well. You pray 5 times a day, always fast during Ramadhan, go to regular arabic, Qur'an and fiqh classes to progress your knowledge, never miss giving zakat, been on hajj and umrah a number of times, give regular charity, even go far as to personally help out at the local homeless shelter every now and then.

In short, you're living an idyllic lifestyle, by both dunya and akhira standards.

Then, imagine tragedy striking.

One day you wake and find that intruders have broken into your home. They've tied you all up. Stolen all your possessions. They rape your wife and daughters in front of your eyes, with you helpless to do anything. They then kill all your family members, leaving you alone alive. They inject you with HIV positive blood out of malice and burn your house down on the way out.

You're saved by firemen and taken to the hospital. You wake up out of a coma a few weeks later and to add insult to injury, you find that your business has gone bankrupt. You have nobody and nothing. You're destitute and living with horrible memories of that fateful day.

Rhetorical questions:

Would you be able to resign yourself to what Allah has willed to test you with? Do you ask 'why me?' Do you become depressed and lose all hope and go far as to doubt in Allah? Do you have thoughts of suicide and the desire to end it all?

The above scenario is obviously a far-fetched one, but substitute any other horrible calamity to the ones above and ask yourself the same questions. Would you be able to submit to what Allah has willed for you and be patient with it?

The issue I'm trying to raise here is the strengh of our connection with Allah.

Do we have enough tawakul (trust and reliance in Allah) to tolerate all things that come our way, no matter how bad, and be patient at the same time? Do we see this world as being only temporary and realise that while the above are extremely harsh things to have happen, they are nothing but events put in place solely to test us?

How strong is our actual relationship with Allah? How do we see this world, do we recognise wholeheartedly that it is temporary?
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gladTidings
03-05-2010, 04:28 PM
Wow. He got it bad.

I think if your circumstances ever change so drastically there’s only one way through it and that is to accept it, and to remember that Allah swt, in his infinite wisdom, will never burden us with more than we can bear.

I think we do tend to forget that we are not here forever and our affluent lifestyle often distracts us from reflecting on death and the hereafter. Personally, I have faced a change in circumstances but lived through it...however I find that it is more testing to be patient i.e. steadfast and grateful through better times.
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Ramadhan
03-05-2010, 04:33 PM
I may need some time to internalize all this. It's pretty powerful stuff you wrote.
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PouringRain
03-05-2010, 04:47 PM
I believe that God can use any tragedy for his glory. I know there are many people in this world who have had to endure much more than their fair share in life, myself included, but through those things I am here alive and God has brought me through them all. Nothing we face in life is too great for him. He holds our very breath in his hands. Even if faced with something as devastating as the incident above, after spending time to grieve and heal, I would do everything I could to rise up and show God's love to others. Even in the storms of life, God is there to lift me up, and no matter how difficult it will be I will continue to eternally praise him.
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Alpha Dude
03-05-2010, 07:52 PM
The story of Prophet Ayub Alaihe Salam comes to mind. He lived a blessed life for a number of years but it was all taken away from him. He was severely tested, yet remained patient.
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-Fallen Angel-
03-05-2010, 08:36 PM
That would be a bad deal. I would still be patient and pray, hoping to see my family again in the afterlife (Inshallah). However depending on the conditions, i may just set out to kill these scumabgs. FOR JUSTICE! lol.
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Misz_Muslimah
03-05-2010, 08:51 PM
Jazaakalahu khayran for sharing brother ..
:wa:
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Getoffmyback
03-05-2010, 09:35 PM
Wow if someone can stand all this then he is a hero. People should be strong really .

I witnessed 3 suicide in my area 2 of them in the same building where i live now . One of them took her life a week ago .she took a medicine that she knows she is clergic to it. and many reason were circulated on the neighbor's tongues about Why she did it or how and she is only 18 . One of the reasons as they said it was because of a love storie. Allah 3alim.

The other one (40 something years old) shot herself 2 years ago . She used her son's gun. Her problem that i really know about was maniac depression and the hardest migrain in the world . But again allahu a3lam.

Both of them are veiled muslims.

Really sensitive people i don't understand them:(
I'm sorry for sharing this. I think the thread is about endurance by using the faith. But not all can endure unfortunately :(
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OurIslamic
03-05-2010, 09:40 PM
Honestly, at this moment in my life, I can say that I would buckle under the pressure and fall into a severe depression and not want to live any more.

I need to become stronger, mentally, and increase my iman.
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Dagless
03-05-2010, 11:35 PM
Didn't this happen to Steven Segal? Generally though, I think it would be too much for most of us to bear.
I'm gonna take you to the bank, Senator Trent. To the blood bank! *looks menacingly at camera*
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aadil77
03-05-2010, 11:44 PM
Reminds me of the story of Prophet Ayyub (a.h), he was steadfast in iman ever after his huge calamities
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KittenLover
03-05-2010, 11:45 PM
I wouldn't be able to breathe untill I had revenge :(
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syilla
03-10-2010, 03:43 PM
I will always remember the story of prophet Ayyub... how he was strong in calamities even he can always make dua to remove them... the story really inspired me. Eventhough i'm not as strong as him...
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Re.TiReD
03-10-2010, 03:55 PM
SubhanAllah, I ditto what naidamar said actually...

Reminds me of a text message I once received though:

A sailor was stuck on an island where he was the only survivor. He made a hut for his shelter. Day and night he was praying and waiting for somebody to come and rescue him but nobody came. He stored food in his hut for survival but one day the hut burned to ashes and nothing was left of it. He was so angry, he exclaimed, God why have you done this to me? The next morning rescuers came. He asked how they had found him, their reply? We saw a smoke signal!! Trust Allah when misfortunes happen, His plans are ALWAYS greater! :D
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PouringRain
03-10-2010, 04:48 PM
I was reading something earlier that goes along with this thread. It was saying that without the dark, God's light would not be able to shine. :)
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Getoffmyback
03-10-2010, 05:16 PM
My friend had an accident but he was drunk . After the crash he started to practice islam seriously . He said god caused this accident because he was drinking!!!

But he was drunk ?! Alcohol was the cause of the accident not god ? Or this way of thinking is wrong?
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PouringRain
03-10-2010, 06:22 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Getoffmyback
My friend had an accident but he was drunk . After the crash he started to practice islam seriously . He said god caused this accident because he was drinking!!!

But he was drunk ?! Alcohol was the cause of the accident not god ? Or this way of thinking is wrong?
Personally, I do not believe that God causes things in order to punish us for our sins, but that he does allow the natural consequences of our actions to happen. But I believe that it is through the bad that God can cause his light to shine. He can take the bad and turn it for his own glory and good if we allow him.

I would agree with you that the alcohol caused the crash, not God, but God took the bad and made it for good.
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Alpha Dude
03-10-2010, 06:58 PM
:sl:
format_quote Originally Posted by Getoffmyback
My friend had an accident but he was drunk . After the crash he started to practice islam seriously . He said god caused this accident because he was drinking!!!

But he was drunk ?! Alcohol was the cause of the accident not god ? Or this way of thinking is wrong?
Allah is in control of everything. He has power over every little thing contained within the seven heavens.

This is why we have been told to make dua to Allah. We want him to help alter our fate and protect us.

The entire series of events leading up to the accident were within the control of Allah. If Allah willed, he could have prevented the accident.

Allah gives hardship to people in order to try them. Sometimes hardship is sent as a punishment in this world, so that the servant meets Allah on the day of judgement with a cleaner slate (hardship wipes away sin).

Sometimes people need hardship to snap them out of heedlessness and to make them realise that this world is temporary. This kind of hardship can be seen as Allah willing good upon a person (in the long term other-wordly sense). The fact that your friend started practicing seriously indicates that Allah's guidance is upon him.

We shouldn't even take medicine believing that the medicine itself will cure us. It is all in the hands of Allah. If Allah hasn't willed cure for us, no amount of medicine or treatment will be of any help.
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PouringRain
03-10-2010, 09:40 PM
I have some questions, so that I may understand your post/ belief more clearly, Alpha Dude.

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
:sl:
Allah is in control of everything. He has power over every little thing contained within the seven heavens.

This is why we have been told to make dua to Allah. We want him to help alter our fate and protect us.
I agree that God is in control of all things and has the power over every little thing. Even if people make dua, it is still God's choice to intervene in the outcome or not, would that be correct? If people do not make dua, God can still intervene or he can choose not to, would you say that is also correct?


format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude

The entire series of events leading up to the accident were within the control of Allah. If Allah willed, he could have prevented the accident.
I agree that all things are within God's control, and he could have prevented the accident. Would it be correct to say that your position is that God caused the accident in order to teach him a lesson? As opposed to my belief that God allowed the accident to happen as a natural consequence of drinking and driving, and then used the calamity for his good?

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude

Allah gives hardship to people in order to try them. Sometimes hardship is sent as a punishment in this world, so that the servant meets Allah on the day of judgement with a cleaner slate (hardship wipes away sin).
I do agree that God puts us through trials. I believe it is for the purpose to mold us, teach us, grow us, perfect us, etc. Are you saying that all trials are given by God?

For me, I believe that there are trials that God directly puts us through, and there are those that he allows us to go through on our own. It would be the difference between placing the child's hand on the stove in order to show the child it is hot, and allowing the child to find out on their own that the stove is hot, because they have ignored the warnings and chosen to follow their own way. In the second, the parent is still full able to intervene and stop the event from happening, but the parent has chosen to step back and allow the consequence to be learned.

I view the car accident as the second type of trial. God allowed it to happen as a natural consequence of a bad action, but then he used the bad for good-- to bring the man back to a right place with him. This does not mean that God could not have intervened at any time and stopped it.

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
Sometimes people need hardship to snap them out of heedlessness and to make them realise that this world is temporary. This kind of hardship can be seen as Allah willing good upon a person (in the long term other-wordly sense). The fact that your friend started practicing seriously indicates that Allah's guidance is upon him.
I have no questions with this statement. :)

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude

We shouldn't even take medicine believing that the medicine itself will cure us. It is all in the hands of Allah. If Allah hasn't willed cure for us, no amount of medicine or treatment will be of any help.
I agree that it is God who determines if we live or die.

Medicine gets into another type of discussion completely, especially when discussing God's will, because of those who believe that we should not use medicine at all and should rely solely on God to determine the outcome of the individual. So, I won't ask any questions about this area.

That is all my questions. Thank you. :)
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Alpha Dude
03-10-2010, 11:04 PM
Sure, PouringRain.
I agree that God is in control of all things and has the power over every little thing. Even if people make dua, it is still God's choice to intervene in the outcome or not, would that be correct? If people do not make dua, God can still intervene or he can choose not to, would you say that is also correct?
Yes, that is correct. It is up to Allah whether to give an immediate acceptance of a dua (supplication) or not. Acceptance of dua depends on a number of factors, such as sincerity in asking, the level with which a person is obeying Allah in his daily life and more. Sometimes a dua will be withheld, with the reward of it being given in paradise. So, technically, every dua is answered, either in this world or rewarded for in the hearafter.

One of the 99 main attributes of Allah is that he is All Wise, so he may withhold from answering a dua because he has something else that is better than that which is being asked in store. Like in the example of the person who had the accident - if he had made dua for protection from all calamities the morning of that day before he got drunk, it can be said that Allah didn't answer that specific dua since he had something better planned for the brother (something that ultimately led him to practise his religion more keenly, benefiting him in his afterlife).

I agree that all things are within God's control, and he could have prevented the accident. Would it be correct to say that your position is that God caused the accident in order to teach him a lesson? As opposed to my belief that God allowed the accident to happen as a natural consequence of drinking and driving, and then used the calamity for his good?
How about: Allah allowed it to happen as a natural consequence of drink/driving in order to teach him a lesson and used the calamity as a means for his good.

I do agree that God puts us through trials. I believe it is for the purpose to mold us, teach us, grow us, perfect us, etc. Are you saying that all trials are given by God?
Yes, they are all from Allah. I too believe hardships are there for us to take lessons from. A form of 'tough love'.

For me, I believe that there are trials that God directly puts us through, and there are those that he allows us to go through on our own.
I reflected on what you say here for quite a while and I actually agree. For example, you might be born blind which would be a direct trial from Allah whereas other stuff like being trialled with accident could arise out of our own negligence in following his commandments.

I'm going on a bit of a tangent, but Islamically, every single little moment and every single situation we find ourselves in during our lives is to be seen a trial. Not just the major hardships one would go through. One of the most fundamental concepts in Islam is that this life is a test. Every single waking moment is part of this test.

It's not just hardships that trial us. We also have to watch what we do with the blessings we have been given. For example, we are gifted with time - how do we spend it? If we waste it doing something futile, we're failing the test. Likewise if we think of water. It's a great blessing Allah has given us. How do we use it? Do we conserve and use only as much as is necessary or do we take it for granted and abuse? Same can be said for wealth, health and countless other stuff. These are all 'trials' of some sort or another.

I view the car accident as the second type of trial. God allowed it to happen as a natural consequence of a bad action, but then he used the bad for good-- to bring the man back to a right place with him. This does not mean that God could not have intervened at any time and stopped it.
This I agree with too.

Medicine gets into another type of discussion completely, especially when discussing God's will, because of those who believe that we should not use medicine at all and should rely solely on God to determine the outcome of the individual. So, I won't ask any questions about this area.
Just so there's no ambiguity, I meant to say medicine in and of itself cannot cure a person. If Allah has destined for a person to be faced with a particular type of illness for however many years, no amount of medicine would be effective. However, this does not mean we neglect and 'resign' to fate/become fatalistic. We have been told to look for means to cure ourselves and medicine is just that, a permissible means.

There's an anecdote from the time of the Prophet Muhammad's (peace be upon him) time which I think is related to this issue of reliance:
One day Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) noticed a Bedouin leaving his camel without tying it and he asked the Bedouin, "Why don't you tie down your camel?" The Bedouin answered, "I put my trust in Allah." The Prophet then said, "Tie your camel first, then put your trust in Allah" (At-Tirmidhi).
It makes clear that we have to use the means provided while at the same time having trust. We can't neglect either. They both have their place.

I hope I have explained myself clear enough. Feel free to ask if anything doesn't make sense.
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Alpha Dude
03-10-2010, 11:23 PM
There's an anecdote from the time of the Prophet Muhammad's (peace be upon him) time which I think is related to this issue of reliance:
One day Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) noticed a Bedouin leaving his camel without tying it and he asked the Bedouin, "Why don't you tie down your camel?" The Bedouin answered, "I put my trust in Allah." The Prophet then said, "Tie your camel first, then put your trust in Allah" (At-Tirmidhi).
It makes clear that we have to use the means provided while at the same time having trust. We can't neglect either. They both have their place.
On this issue of reliance, to link it back to the original topic of the thread, sometimes a person has no other option but to rely on Allah completely (submit to the wisdom of Allah) or face complete and utter hopelessness, perhaps slipping into long term 'untreatable' depression and even suiciding. Like in the hypothetical case I described in the OP, such an extreme test which can only be handled by having utmost reliance that whatever has happened is indeed for the best. In such cases, there are no wordly means that can be utilised to solve the 'problem'. There simply has to be an element of total sumission.
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PouringRain
03-11-2010, 05:13 AM
Alpha Dude, thanks for your thorough reply. :)

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
I'm going on a bit of a tangent, but Islamically, every single little moment and every single situation we find ourselves in during our lives is to be seen a trial. Not just the major hardships one would go through. One of the most fundamental concepts in Islam is that this life is a test. Every single waking moment is part of this test.
I agree with this also. I call them learning experiences. Everything is life is a learning experience-- positive and negative-- and it is up to us to be open to what we can learn from it. I tell my kids that education does not stop when the school bell rings. It stops when you die.

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
It's not just hardships that trial us. We also have to watch what we do with the blessings we have been given. For example, we are gifted with time - how do we spend it? If we waste it doing something futile, we're failing the test. Likewise if we think of water. It's a great blessing Allah has given us. How do we use it? Do we conserve and use only as much as is necessary or do we take it for granted and abuse? Same can be said for wealth, health and countless other stuff. These are all 'trials' of some sort or another.
I agree. We call this being good stewards of your time, talent, and money, but it applies to more than just those three categories. Your example of water is one that would not fit within those categories, but to waste it would not be being a good steward over that which God has given.

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
Just so there's no ambiguity, I meant to say medicine in and of itself cannot cure a person. If Allah has destined for a person to be faced with a particular type of illness for however many years, no amount of medicine would be effective. However, this does not mean we neglect and 'resign' to fate/become fatalistic. We have been told to look for means to cure ourselves and medicine is just that, a permissible means.
I would agree. I believe that God gave us things for medicinal purposes, including our brains to be able to use them.

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
There's an anecdote from the time of the Prophet Muhammad's (peace be upon him) time which I think is related to this issue of reliance:
One day Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) noticed a Bedouin leaving his camel without tying it and he asked the Bedouin, "Why don't you tie down your camel?" The Bedouin answered, "I put my trust in Allah." The Prophet then said, "Tie your camel first, then put your trust in Allah" (At-Tirmidhi).
It makes clear that we have to use the means provided while at the same time having trust. We can't neglect either. They both have their place.

I hope I have explained myself clear enough. Feel free to ask if anything doesn't make sense.
I like the camel anecdote. :thumbs_up I think things like that also go along with being a good steward over that which God has given us.

format_quote Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
On this issue of reliance, to link it back to the original topic of the thread, sometimes a person has no other option but to rely on Allah completely (submit to the wisdom of Allah) or face complete and utter hopelessness, perhaps slipping into long term 'untreatable' depression and even suiciding. Like in the hypothetical case I described in the OP, such an extreme test which can only be handled by having utmost reliance that whatever has happened is indeed for the best. In such cases, there are no wordly means that can be utilised to solve the 'problem'. There simply has to be an element of total sumission.
I agree... and I will say from personal experience that it is not easy and can be quite scary. When God asks you to place your child in a den of wolves (figuratively) and walk away trusting God then it can be one of the most terrifying experiences in the world.
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Getoffmyback
03-11-2010, 01:36 PM
My friend is muslim and since alcohol is forbidden in islam So he will relate the accident with the punishment of god because he is breaking the rules? . Lets say if he was christian then his mentality will be different he is not sinning here So he wont say that god punished me it was only the alcohol . ?!
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aadil77
03-11-2010, 02:21 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Getoffmyback
My friend is muslim and since alcohol is forbidden in islam So he will relate the accident with the punishment of god because he is breaking the rules? . Lets say if he was christian then his mentality will be different he is not sinning here So he wont say that god punished me it was only the alcohol . ?!
If I was him I would relate it to anything wrong I may be doing, not just alcohol
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PouringRain
03-11-2010, 04:51 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Getoffmyback
My friend is muslim and since alcohol is forbidden in islam So he will relate the accident with the punishment of god because he is breaking the rules? . Lets say if he was christian then his mentality will be different he is not sinning here So he wont say that god punished me it was only the alcohol . ?!
I don't know that you can simply separate Muslims and Christians in that manner. Not all Christians drink, and even of those who do drink, you will hear is said that drunkenness is a sin. Christians are difficult to lump in one category... I suppose that is the biggest problem I am having with your logic. :) You will find Christians who also would say God caused it; and you will find Christians such as myself who would say that God did not directly cause it, but he allowed it as a natural consequence; and there will be some Christians who will say God had nothing to do with any of it.
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