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Anam 27
04-15-2010, 05:45 PM
Salaam & hello everyone,

I am Anam, I have been reading up a lot on Islam for the past few months, so I decided to join here.

I am born to a Yemeni Muslim father & a Syrian Christian mother, my parents divorced when I was a child & religious differences was the issue. They met as University students in Britain.

My mother was & still is a very devout Christian, she had refused to convert to Islam when she married my father, although my grandparents had insisted upon a conversion. My father wasn't very religious then, but my birth brought out the Muslim in him. My mom still had me baptized a Christian, against his wishes. Three years later, I had twin sisters, however problems between my parents persisted over religion, & they separated & finally divorced when I was 6.My mother left Britain with me & my sisters, but my father stayed on. He remarried & had 4 more children, my mom didn't remarry.

I am closer to Christianity than Islam, being raised by my mom, but I think I don't believe in any God or religion, so agnostic describes me best.My sisters & I were raised by my mother & maternal grandmother. My mom is a scientist, my grandmother breeds dogs,we didn't really miss out very much because of not having my father around, because we had a loving home with grandparents & pets around, but it still hurt me when I saw other kids' with their fathers.

I have been reading up on Islam for the past few months, & have learnt loads of things about it, I thought I would join an Islamic forum to discuss issues.

I went to University inUK & am in a committed relationship with a British Anglican man, I am going to be married & moving to London permanently in a few months.
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marwen
04-15-2010, 06:04 PM
Welcome to the forum sister.
hope you find here many informations about islam. There are always brothers and sisters who will happily answer any of your questions.
Have a nice stay :)
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Anam 27
04-15-2010, 06:10 PM
Thank you marwen.
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Abdul-Raouf
04-15-2010, 06:35 PM
Welcome sister...........

Now the web search engines .... have directed u to the best web (Islamicboard ).......hope u stick to it.
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glo
04-15-2010, 06:44 PM
Welcome to the forum, and thank you for sharing your story, Anam.

Did you find it difficult to be raised (at least to some extend) in a family of mixed religion?

I am married to an atheist. He was an agnostic when we met and I a non-practising Christian. When I made a commitment to the Christian faith, my husband did his own soul-searching and came to the conclusion that he did not believe in the existence of God.
Our differences in beliefs have caused us difficulties over the years - still do occasionally, although we have grown in acceptance and respect of each other now.
Raising children with two belief systems present is difficult though.

Do you have no contact with your father now? Do you ever think about finding him?

I wish you a beautiful wedding and a wonderful married life! :)
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Anam 27
04-15-2010, 07:01 PM
Hello glo,

Did you find it difficult to be raised (at least to some extend) in a family of mixed religion?
As I said, my parents divorced when I was 6, so I wasn't raised in a family of mixed religion for many years. I don't remember much, just some vague recollections of mom taking me to church, dad telling me Islamic stuff etc.Even at such a tender age, I realised that parents weren't happy together & I wasn't really heartbroken when they divorced, I was raised Christian by my mother & grandparents.

I personally wouldn't want to enter into a marriage with a man of very different religious leanings, my would be husband is a non practicing Anglican, I too am not religious.

As I said, I have some emotional attachment to Christiaity because of my upbringing, so I am happy to marry a Christian.

Raising children with two belief systems present is difficult though.
My fiancee & I hope to be parents, & sooner rather than later, I guess we'll raise our kids non practicing Christians.

Do you have no contact with your father now? Do you ever think about finding him?
I am in touch with my father, but we don't meet often, even when I was in UK, I didn't meet him often. I somehow find it uncomfortable to be with my stepmother, but somehow, I love my step siblings a lot. I am quite close to them. My father is still disappointed that I'm not Muslim, that my sisters consider themselves Christian & that I'm not marrying a Muslim man.


I wish you a beautiful wedding and a wonderful married life!
Thank you very much
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aadil77
04-15-2010, 09:44 PM
Originally Posted by Anam 27
I am in touch with my father, but we don't meet often, even when I was in UK, I didn't meet him often. I somehow find it uncomfortable to be with my stepmother, but somehow, I love my step siblings a lot. I am quite close to them. My father is still disappointed that I'm not Muslim, that my sisters consider themselves Christian & that I'm not marrying a Muslim man.
Welcome to the forums

You can expect your father to be dissapointed because he as a muslim had a duty to raise his kids on islam and he will be held accountable for that infront of Allah. This is one of the biggest problems with marrying non-muslims. As for you marrying a non muslim, again he'll be disappointed because in islam a muslim woman is not allowed to marry a non-muslim man, since you're not muslim it doesn't matter, but he probably thought you might change if you'd married a muslim.

You said you have some emotional attachment to christianity, can you explain this?
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marwen
04-15-2010, 10:02 PM
Originally Posted by aadil77
Welcome to the forums

You can expect your father to be dissapointed because he as a muslim had a duty to raise his kids on islam and he will be held accountable for that infront of Allah. This is one of the biggest problems with marrying non-muslims. As for you marrying a non muslim, again he'll be disappointed because in islam a muslim woman is not allowed to marry a non-muslim man, since you're not muslim it doesn't matter, but he probably thought you might change if you'd married a muslim.

You said you have some emotional attachment to christianity, can you explain this?
Yes I agree with brother aadil77, it may be something you want to know :
if there is a possibility that you become convinced by islam and become a muslim in the future, then you must know that in islam muslim woman is not allowed to marry a non-muslim, and if a woman is married to a non-muslim and then she converts to islam she must divorce him or ask him to convert to islam. We just want you to know this in case you see the truth in islam or change your actual beliefs, that it will be hard for you to divorce a non-muslim husband in case you have children etc..
If you are really intending to know about islam, then it's probably possible that you become convinced by it (as many people I know) so you have to think about it before getting married.
Sorry to interfere with your personal life but this may be important for you in this life and in the hereafter.
May Allah bless you.
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Misz_Muslimah
04-16-2010, 11:47 AM
Welcome to the forum Anam :)
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Ğħαrєєвαħ
04-16-2010, 02:11 PM
Welcome to the Forum Anam

Hope you have a lovely stay here and learn more about Islaam, its better to keep learning and knowing about each others faith than not knowing!
All the best! :)
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Abdul Wahid
04-16-2010, 04:46 PM
:welcome: to the forum Anam.

Feel free to ask questions about Islam. Hope you enjoy your stay.

PS: Nice name is Anam - meaning Blessing's of God.
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Anam 27
04-19-2010, 12:15 PM
Originally Posted by aadil77
Welcome to the forums

You can expect your father to be dissapointed because he as a muslim had a duty to raise his kids on islam and he will be held accountable for that infront of Allah. This is one of the biggest problems with marrying non-muslims. As for you marrying a non muslim, again he'll be disappointed because in islam a muslim woman is not allowed to marry a non-muslim man, since you're not muslim it doesn't matter, but he probably thought you might change if you'd married a muslim.

You said you have some emotional attachment to christianity, can you explain this?
Hello aadil,

Sorry for the late reply, I went to another city to attend a conference. I have some emotional attachment to Christianity because of the way I was raised, by my Christian mother & my grandmother, I regularly attended church as a child. I can't believe in any God with certainty, so I call myself an agnostic.

if there is a possibility that you become convinced by islam and become a muslim in the future, then you must know that in islam muslim woman is not allowed to marry a non-muslim, and if a woman is married to a non-muslim and then she converts to islam she must divorce him or ask him to convert to islam. We just want you to know this in case you see the truth in islam or change your actual beliefs, that it will be hard for you to divorce a non-muslim husband in case you have children etc..
If you are really intending to know about islam, then it's probably possible that you become convinced by it (as many people I know) so you have to think about it before getting married.
Sorry to interfere with your personal life but this may be important for you in this life and in the hereafter.



Hello marwen,

I don't think I will become Muslim, I have read the Quran & Sahih Bukhari & Sahih Muslim hadiths. I think being agnostic is what makes me comfortable.

In fact, I think if I ever had to choose a religion, I might go back to Christianity-though that is unlikely too.

I see no reason to break off my engagement to a man I love, simply because of any spiritual change which might happen in future, as I see little chance of that happening. Also, I know my temperament, I am incapable of being so involved with any religion that I would divorce my husband if he doesn't convert to it.
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