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abdulali
05-15-2010, 09:54 PM
Aslamoalykom

I needs advice. My wife has had a miscarage. The baby is 12 weeks old and is about the size of a thumb. If we give the fetus to the hospital they will cremate it.

What is the islamic way to deal with this situation?
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aadil77
05-15-2010, 09:58 PM
my aunty had one, they put it in a small box and got it buried
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جوري
05-15-2010, 10:16 PM
a 12 week fetus that passes through miscarriage (which at this age is the size of a strawberry) is called products of conception usually gets sent to pathology for histopathological assessment.. from there I believe the remains go into bio-hazard boxes but I am not sure how they are handled thereafter.. sob7an Allah.. I never even though about it..

:w:
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جوري
05-15-2010, 10:18 PM
on a separate note please accept my condolences I am sure this is an exceptionally difficult time for your wife.. my sister had two miscarriages, my aunt had three, and another one actually lost twins a few days after birth.. it is a pretty traumatic experience may Allah swt see you both through this difficulty..

:w:
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PouringRain
05-15-2010, 10:32 PM
Has your wife been to the hospital since the miscarriage? The Vale's Lily is right about what the hospital does with a fetus..... but regardless of if you take the fetus in or not, your wife should still be seen so they can make sure that everything has come out properly and there were no complications. I had a miscarriage at 12 weeks, so I can empathize with your wife. Sorry, I can't tell you anything about Islamically how to handle the situation. I wish you and your wife all the best.
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abdulali
05-16-2010, 08:48 AM
Thank you for your kind words. Yes my wife has seeked professional medical help. But we are still unsure what to do. If we leave to the hospital they will cremate it. Is this allowed? if we bring it home where do we bury it? It is 12 weeks old.
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Ummu Sufyaan
05-16-2010, 09:08 AM
:sl:
when a person in my family miscarried, we just wrapped it in tissue (it was 11 weeks old) and buried it in the back yard. i wouldn't give it to the hospital...i think its better if it gets buried.
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Ramadhan
05-16-2010, 09:55 AM
^ I don't know if it's Islamic, but here we also always bury fetus from miscarriages.
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جوري
05-16-2010, 03:11 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Ummu Sufyaan
:sl:
i wouldn't give it to the hospital...i think its better if it gets buried.
The pathologist needs to determine the cause of the spontaneous abortion, and a doctor needs to examine the mother to make sure there are no retained products of conception since that can cause death!
Believe it or not determining the cause of death can help the mother carry to term with subsequent pregnancies for instance if she has anti-cardiolipin antibodies.

There is no point to take a chance on something like that.. I know people see millions of pregnancies everyday and think it is an easy routine event.. but very bad things can happen if one takes the cavalier approach!

:w:
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abdulali
05-17-2010, 08:30 PM
for future reference, some hospitals in the Uk give you an option of cremating or burying the baby. They also provide to bury the baby on it's own or in a mass grave. This is reassuring that at a difficult time some one will help to organise to bury the baby. Islamic guidance can be easily found but putting it in to practice was slighly more difficult. Can I thank all those people for their kind words and guidance. The family as a whole are doing well.

Aslamoalykom.
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PouringRain
05-17-2010, 09:17 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by abdulali
The family as a whole are doing well.
That is good to hear that everyone is doing well. :)

If you haven't done it already, go buy your wife some flowers and tell her how much you love her and appreciate her. Even if she is handling this well outwardly, women need special attention and love after going through a time like this. May God bless you and your wife with another baby in due time.
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جوري
05-17-2010, 10:00 PM
al7mdlillah.. may Allah swt grant you for your patience and virtue ..

:w:
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Nirvana
05-22-2010, 01:26 AM
You have my condolences. :(
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