please answer

[dinigobale]

i am newly marriad and i hae a problem with my wife. she does pray but some times she forgets and when ever she got her period its hard for her to start over again, i have been trying remind her and all, but since we dont live together right now, i cant tell her pray every prayer. anyways one day i asked her did u pray she said no, i asked her why. and she has no valid reason then i got mad. i said to her if you dont pray you are automatically DIVORCED! i regregt my swear thou i was serious and i dont want her to take the prayer some thing that she can pray when she want or leave when she wants, anyways what should i do now. if she doesnt pray one day will she be divorced? plus like i said b4 she wants to pray and she is trying but shaydaan has a power over her.

[Muslimeen]

Divorce is not a small matter, and people are always urged to learn about the conditions of divorce and how easily it can be uttered and end a marriage. I suggest you contact an Alim or Mufti on this. I don't think this is a case for anyone on this forum unfortunately. It is in your best interest to consult someone knowledgeable before you continue your relationship with your wife as you may be living in zina.

[Abu Zainab]

Brother never ever utter that word unless you are 100% sure and had thought about it with a clear mind and most importantly did istikhara.
What you said is quite grave as you set a condition which could easily "be met" even by religious people.

Explain this situation to your local imam and get a definite ruling on this matter. If divorce is really applied then you have to renew your marriage contract and that divorce will be counted as one divorce (third divorce and then there is no turning back). So please do not make that mistake again.

I pray that everything turns out well for you and that you lead a happy and religious life with your wife.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:
-speak to a shiekh.

-advise her kindly what she is doing wrong. threatening her with divorce probably wont be all that helpful...speak to her, don't threaten her.

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[Hamza Asadullah]

i am newly marriad and i hae a problem with my wife. she does pray but some times she forgets and when ever she got her period its hard for her to start over again, i have been trying remind her and all, but since we dont live together right now, i cant tell her pray every prayer. anyways one day i asked her did u pray she said no, i asked her why. and she has no valid reason then i got mad. i said to her if you dont pray you are automatically DIVORCED! i regregt my swear thou i was serious and i dont want her to take the prayer some thing that she can pray when she want or leave when she wants, anyways what should i do now. if she doesnt pray one day will she be divorced? plus like i said b4 she wants to pray and she is trying but shaydaan has a power over her.

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my brother we must realise that forcing someone to change NEVER works. That is not the way to encourage someone to do something you want them to do. A women is made from the left rib of Adam (As) which is brittle and will shatter if too much pressure is applied so therefore you should be gentle and use wisdom and tact whenever you want her to do something. Do NOT ever force her to do anything for that will bring her further away from Salaah and deen. Therefore you must change your approach and know that your current approach does not and will never work.

You should sit down with her for a little while each day and read a few passages from a beneficial Islamic book like Riyaadusaaliheen etc. Or you can sit with her listening to a beneficial Islamic lecture on Salaah and the importance of Salaah so she realises its significance. You should also remind her about the hereafter in a loving, gentle and beautiful manner using wisdom and tact so that she realises that her time is short and so that she may be encouraged to pray properly.

By talking to her about the importance of Salaah, the hereafter and death she will be more likely to realise that she must start praying properly as oppose to your current method of forcing her to pray which is only going to make things worse.

Also make much dua for her for Allah to give her guidance but you must realise that you cannot guide her for guidance is ONLY in the hands of Allah. Therefore you should continue to remind her of the importance of Salaah and about the hereafter and death in a loving, caring, gentle and beautiful manner using wisdom and tact and this will have a MUCH greater affect than to force her to pray.

Continue doing this and inshallah she will begin to pray but be patient and keep thinking to yourself that guidance is not in your hands for it is ONLY in the hands of Allah. Also keep thinking to yourself that you have done your fard by telling her and the rest is upto her so continue doing as i have told you to and leave the rest to Allah.

Here are some very beneficial lectures which you should listen to with your wife in order that her imaan and fear of Allah is increased:

Importance of Salah (praying) Part 1-6

http://il.youtube.com/watch?v=SvfsvRQMXPg

Importance of Salah (praying) Part 2-6

http://il.youtube.com/watch?v=TIB3UtZXW3Y

Importance of Salah (praying) Part 3-6

http://il.youtube.com/watch?v=CA5i6ZI5gnU

Importance of Salah (praying) Part 4-6

http://il.youtube.com/watch?v=p8WfS4nETks

Importance of Salah (praying) Part 5-6

http://il.youtube.com/watch?v=3N4nX0_3UHQ

Importance of Salah (praying) Part 6-6

http://il.youtube.com/watch?v=iZlTG5Giqmw

Pray before your prayed upon!

http://il.youtube.com/watch?v=B4BgYCPQbLU

Angel of Death!!! - Sheikh Ahmed Ali

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUzRJXlB2uA

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 1/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ieX7ZQtHl0s

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 2/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KK_2sVGMW08

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 3/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpmzA2hk1Bo

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 4/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km39GfL62TQ

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - The Journey of the Soul

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAwHEXE3-n0


HARD HITTING Lecture on HELLFIRE & the Day of JUDGEMENT! يوم القيامة والجحيم

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O6L_fBk7VM

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 1/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWTehIeCOUU

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 2/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXTtk7rWx_U

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 3/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmiD86w9fBc


Islam - Punishment of the Grave by Sheikh Riyadh ul Haq

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWb-hYIm2WE

Death and the Grave by Murtaza Khan

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7r2nzJVecqo

How can we not appreciate what we have after watching this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkEBUC0APMg



And Allah knows best in all matters

[cat eyes]

i am newly marriad and i hae a problem with my wife. she does pray but some times she forgets and when ever she got her period its hard for her to start over again, i have been trying remind her and all, but since we dont live together right now, i cant tell her pray every prayer. anyways one day i asked her did u pray she said no, i asked her why. and she has no valid reason then i got mad. i said to her if you dont pray you are automatically DIVORCED! i regregt my swear thou i was serious and i dont want her to take the prayer some thing that she can pray when she want or leave when she wants, anyways what should i do now. if she doesnt pray one day will she be divorced? plus like i said b4 she wants to pray and she is trying but shaydaan has a power over her.

okay this is not the way you should behave. did the prophet (saw) ever punish any one to get them to pray there salah?

i didn't understand your post but what are you saying? do you think divorce is a little thing that you should threaten her with such a thing? please fear Allah

and speak with reliable imam. you need to learn tact.. u need to calm down and start behaving like a muslim yourself first because this is not the way a muslim should behave when dealing with his wife.

how is getting mad going to solve the problem?

[Muslim Woman]

Salaam bro ,

if u are so serious about salat that u are threating wife like this , u should have enquired the matter before marriage ( if she prays regularly or not ).

as already suggested : talk to a Mufti . What was in ur mind ? If she missed one salat in time , then u meant she is divorced for once ? Anyway , don't behave like this in future .