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*charisma*
09-27-2010, 03:17 AM
Assalamu Alaikum

I've got a disease..it's called indecisiveness.

It really affects me every single day. I can never decide on what to do and other times if I do decide I feel I'm becoming too extreme. Here's an example: I go to Uni, at first I wanted to get into Medicine, but then I thought do I really want to go to school for 8-10 years and isolate myself from everyone just to make sure I get the good grades and stuff? at one point I thought ok I could do that, but then I started thinking about everything else I wanted to learn and do at the same time like maybe becoming a teacher, and running a restaurant, and buiding an islamic school etc. Then i start thinking that life is short and I'm wasting time taking classes when i could self-teach myself a lot of it..so maybe I'm just better off doing something else, but I can't do that cuz I'm broke, so I need school to get a job...blah blah. Then I'm like forget it all, I'll just get married and be the bestest wife possible and concentrate on my iman and move away to a Muslim country and maintain a simple lifestyle. But even then I start thinking about how I should memorize the quran and ahadith and know every little thing in Islam following it down to a T. That's pretty extreme, right? I know, I got mad problems :P

I still don't even know where I'm going with school cuz I'm good at everything, but i just want to be excellent at something and I don't know what that something is yet..othertimes I just want to be excellent at everything that way I won't have to choose...but while I'm in this process not much is getting accomplished and that's the worst thing about it.

I had a dream and it was something I really wanted to do for a long time...but I lost sight of it for multiple reasons and now I'm just lost cuz I don't have a goal to work towards..I just have a bajillion options that all seem kinda cool just cuz I like learning and I would like to experience everything.

And this is just one example of my idescisiveness. I got plenty more..

Any advice?? Du'as? Prayers? lol ANYTHING!

Jazakum Allahu khair

fi aman Allah
w'salaam
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Snowflake
09-27-2010, 08:34 AM
Then I'm like forget it all, I'll just get married and be the bestest wife possible and concentrate on my iman and move away to a Muslim country and maintain a simple lifestyle. But even then I start thinking about how I should memorize the quran and ahadith and know every little thing in Islam following it down to a T. That's pretty extreme, right? I know, I got mad problems :P
Assalamu alaykummm

Ohh my dear sis.. you gave me such a laugh, and on an empty stomach too girl! I feel nauseous now lol blahhh!
I laughed so much because I suffer from the same disease, but my symptoms are less severe al hamdulillah ;D
I’m almost.. almosttt at the point where I can achieve my long time dream of being a business woman, but for some time now I’ve wanted to memorize the Quran, become a muallimah and just spend the rest of my life teaching the Quran. So I was thinking of ditching the business for this much better investment. But then if I have money, I can build mosques, and help my relatives, the poor and much much more.. you get the pic right? So then I thought why not do both haha! It’s going to be harder, but I have to give it a try at least. Erm.. sorry sis, I know that’s not much advice. But at least you’ll feel you’re not alone lol.

I still don't even know where I'm going with school cuz I'm good at everything, but i just want to be excellent at something and I don't know what that something is yet..othertimes I just want to be excellent at everything that way I won't have to choose
I love this one.. be an excellent slave of Allah and be good at everything else.. haha how’s that? :-[
Well, I’ve not been much help, but thank you for putting a smile on my face at the start of the day. Love you in Allah, and I pray you find what is good for your deen duniya and akhirah inshaAllah. Make the same dua for yourself my dear. :wub:



wa alaykum assalam.
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Ummu Sufyaan
09-27-2010, 12:15 PM
wa alaykum us-Salaam
to make decisions, you really need to ask yourself what you want to achieve. i dont mean what you want to do, but in the long run, how will these decisions affect/suit you.
another thing you need to know, is whether they conform to your deen...so anything that conflicts with your iman you may need to disregard it.
also it comes down to what you are capable of and how it fits into your lifestyle. really and truly look at things realistically and analyze how they are going to affect your life, your lifestyle and anything you truly want to achieve. like with your want to study medicine, can you really study for 8-10 years? are you really able to drastically reduce your social life, etc.

don't fool yourself into thinking that you can handle something but at the same time, don't fool yourself that you cant.

maybe you could experience a little bit of everything. strange comparison but this is what i do when im invited somewhere for lunch and i cant choose what to eat. i take a spoonful of everything. works a treat.
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*charisma*
09-27-2010, 06:23 PM
Assalamu Alaikum

Scents of Jannah: Jazaki allahu khair, I'm glad I'm not the only one :D ameen to your du'a and may allah grant you the same ameen! I feel like a scatterbrain, but I'm an organized person...allahu akbar! I think I should pray for guidance haha this is way past what any professional could help me with :p

Ummu Sufyaan: Jazaki Allahu khair for your advice (: Unfortunately, I'm already introverted, so isolating myself comes very naturally to me and I'm the type of person that knows I can do anything if I put my mind to it, I just don't know what to put my mind on. I always take into account what's going to affect my deen, but at the same time I'm never able to see what will affect it negatively until something negative actually happens. I don't know if I'm making sense?

Fi aman Allah
w'salaam
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Insecured soul
09-28-2010, 12:06 AM
what about a trip to space, ever thought and planned about that?
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*charisma*
09-28-2010, 02:19 AM
^No, Alhemdulilah! The last thing I need are more options to think about :D
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Insecured soul
09-28-2010, 03:52 AM
Originally Posted by *charisma*
^No, Alhemdulilah! The last thing I need are more options to think about
I see, anyway
answer to ur 1st message.........
i guess u think too much, i would say just relax, hope it helps

:sl:
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Snowflake
09-28-2010, 09:30 PM
Originally Posted by *charisma*
Assalamu Alaikum

Scents of Jannah: Jazaki allahu khair, I'm glad I'm not the only one :D ameen to your du'a and may allah grant you the same ameen! I feel like a scatterbrain, but I'm an organized person...allahu akbar! I think I should pray for guidance haha this is way past what any professional could help me with :p

w'salaam
:sl: Wa iyyaki sis! Ameen. Finally.. a tiny bit of inspiration came to me. InshaAllah more helpful than my last post. After a severe painful last week, hamdulillah this week is fairly good and so I was trying to cram in as much work as possible before a relapse. I'm lucky as I'll be working from home. So there I was working fairly comfortably in front of the TV watching Peace TV (mashaAllah the perks of the job) and thinking wow I love what I do (how many other people can watch TV while working at the same time) and suddenly you popped you into my head lol, and I thought, "That's it! I should tell sis Charisma to do something she enjoys, I mean really enjoys.. not just any old job for the sake of it..." Well, I don't particularly enjoy stuffing toys. It's a fiddly job, but at least I do it on my own terms and conditions, and I enjoy the result. The money I hope to make from my biz will go toward good things and inshaAllah I'll earn reward from Allah subhana wa ta 'ala.. So there's plenty of factors which make my work appealing and enjoyable, not to mention rewarding.

So consider something that you will enjoy, and which stimulates you and you find rewarding on many levels. Think of something and ask yourself if you can see yourself doing it in five years time. If the answer is yes then it's likely you have based your choice on wisdom rather than impulse. Choose something that'll make you grow as an individual. Something that'll benefit others, as well as yourself in both worlds. Okay... I've run out of things to say. Hope that helped.

Oh one more thing. Whatever you decide, do make istikhara and Allah will guide you in your affairs inshaAllah. : )


:wa:
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*charisma*
09-29-2010, 03:06 AM
Assalamu alaikum

Jazaki allahu khair...i think I'm going to have to pray istikhara for lots of things haha, but inshallah khair (:

thnx tons <3

fi aman allah
wsalaam
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Snowflake
09-30-2010, 08:59 AM
lol mashaAllah...

Bi idhnillah you will make the right choice ukhti. May Allah make it a means of success in both worlds for you dearest. Ameen :)
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