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anonymous
11-11-2010, 12:26 AM
Salam alaikum,

I'm a revert of about 4 years now mashallah however I don't think I can carry on in this beautiful deen without being a hypocrite.

I've suffered a hellish marriage and now I am isolated completely, I've never had the chance to learn much about the deen in great depth because of this isolation.

So I guess you could say my imaan has dropped to the lowest level and has become stagnant.

I just have a really bad impression of muslims and practising alone is so hard.

Ideas? Advice? Opinions?

Jazakallah khair in advance.
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Hamza Asadullah
11-11-2010, 12:54 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
Salam alaikum,

I'm a revert of about 4 years now mashallah however I don't think I can carry on in this beautiful deen without being a hypocrite.

I've suffered a hellish marriage and now I am isolated completely, I've never had the chance to learn much about the deen in great depth because of this isolation.

So I guess you could say my imaan has dropped to the lowest level and has become stagnant.

I just have a really bad impression of muslims and practising alone is so hard.

Ideas? Advice? Opinions?

Jazakallah khair in advance.
Asalaamu Alaikum, my brother you are not alone you have Allah by your side and he is only a dua away. You also have us and me as your brother so you are certainly not alone. As Muslims we are one and when one part of the body is in pain then we should all feel the pain. So we are here for you but you should not give up hope as this is exactley what shaythans wants you to do. Shaythan takes advantage of a person when they are at a low point and he is trying to make you feel despair and is wanting you to feel that you should not be a Muslim any longer but he is your sworn enemy and it is his job to make you feel like this.

Allah has given you guidance to enter into Islam out of countless people so you should be ever thankful for this and NEVER give up hope in Allah for he is only a dua away then why do you not raise your hands and ask of him? He wants his slaves to ask of him in meekness and humbleness then ask away to your hearts content but NEVER say "why" because whah has happened to you has happened for the best even though you may not htink it now. Sometimes it is best if one does move on in life and one should let go of bitterness and put ones faith, hopes, reliance and trust in Allah for is you remember him then you will feel peace and contentment in your heart.

Forsake the love of this world and focus on the hereafter. Make that your ultimate goal and nothing else will matter. Do everything to please Allah. Disregard the rubbish shaythan is whispering to you as he is just wanting you to go even lower but now is the time for you to rise up again and go towards Allah. Of course you can do it we all go through lows brother you are not the only one but we just have to pick ourselves up and strive to do the best we can through adveristy. If you trip then get up and carry on until you have jumped the hurdle. You will jump the hurdle because you have the fight in you.

Are you going to let your enemy Satan win? No way i know you won't as you still do have imaan in you but do not feel like a hypocrite. The past has happened and yes you have been through a lot but so have most of us brother but let us put our FULL faith. reliance and trust in llah and i promise you the fight inside you will come out and you will feel a fresh sense of purpose and worth.

Make your main focus the hereafter which is our ultimate and final destination for why should such a temporary life like this matter? It could be over tomorrow then what would be the point of our spending our whole life jsut for living this world and not bothering with the hereafter.

Then my brother the time for change is now. No it is not an "Obama cliche" it is an internal change within us and a realisation that we can die at ANY second and therefore we CANNOT afford to waste anymore time being sad, upset and depressed because in the hereafter we will regret EVERY second we wasted without remembering Allah and obeying him. So my brother now is the time to move forward. The past is gone and we can learn form it. Get up now and internalise this change in your heart and mind and you will ahve a new sense of purpose and worth.

Disregard your enemy satan who wants to hold you back by feeding you rubbish which is'nt true. Would you believe a known liar? Then why do you believe his whispers when all he wants to do is continue to make you feel despair until you lose all hope?

My brother you came on here for a reason and all good is from Allah so whatever good i am telling you is from Allah so take heed and make NOW the start of the chnage in your life.

The past will NEVER come back so leave it behind you. All that matters is now and the future. Whatever happened happened for the best and inshallah if you continuously rely on Allah and do everything to please him then he wil do what is best for you in every aspect of your life.

I am here for you as are all of us so please ask whatever you like and share anything you want. Also remember me in your dua's. Dua is the best weapon of a Muslim so make use of it and do not forsake it. It is there for you anytime so raise your hands and ask of Allah and everything will start to come togther in your life inshallah.

You never have to practise alone for i can try and find Muslims near you to help and guide you inshallah.

And Allah knows best in all matters
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Ummu Sufyaan
11-11-2010, 02:42 AM
wa alaykum us-Salaam

first thoughts that come to mind is that everyone goes though tough times...but (and with all due respect here) what you are doing in order for you to get over your difficulties is taking the extreme by wanting to give up. but this isnt the right attitude to adopt becuase you cant just give up becuase of some difficulty. similarly, you cant quit school becuase its too stressful. it doesn't make sense =) thats what school is all about. you need to work those hours and revise for your exams in order to pass. you cant just give up becuase it gets stressful. in your case it doesn't make sense to give up your faith a bad marriage. or becuase you feel like a hypocrite, which you don really know if you are. again adopting the extreme isn't necessary =)

another thing that comes to mind is to remember that bad experiences will impact the way we see things, but again we cant give up becuase someone else can come along that makes us feel good about that particular thing, enabling us to view that thing positively. so you see how we cant let things get to us becuase its just a matter of time and place that affects our opinions...a time and place that will one day pass...one day someone can come along and give us a bad opinion about something and another day someone else will come along and give us a good opinion about the same thing. the particular thing stays the same though and doesn't change and so it isn't really a reason to give up that particular thing.

we cant let bad people destroy things good things that we have.

what you can do however, is try work your way around the problem. see what is causing you this stress and try to remove it. see what is making you weak in faith and try to rectify that.

i think everyone at one point in their lives feel like some type of hypocrite.

you maybe feeling like giving up on this deen becuase that is what you were on before.for example if you were already a Muslim and didn't pray, then you started to pray but later on faced difficulties in prayer, you would think and contemplate giving up prayer.
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Ramadhan
11-11-2010, 09:53 AM
:wa:

I don't have much advice to offer as br. Hamza and sis. ummu sufyan have covered many things above.

May Allah SWT ease all yuor affirs and grant you goodness in this world and hereafter. and May Allah SWT makes you strong and give you sabr in facing all the trials in this world, and May He SWT solve your marriage problems. Amiin.
I assume you are a woman, so is there any way to save your marriage, and if not, would it be possible to seek divorce?
May Allah SWT give hidaya to your husband to see that his wife is having such a difficult time and help you out of it. Amiin.
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