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anonymous
01-16-2011, 05:32 AM
Defintion of oppression? that person doesn't really take your feelings into consideration and seems to do things to spite you. they seem to do things to compete with you. you really hate it and cant take it becuase you cant see any reason why you are a competition to them. generally you mind your own business :hmm:. heck, its draining the life out of you. you want to be your own person, but no stupid people and thier stupidness just cant help but butt in.

this leads you to an emotional high (yeah laugh why dont you) by emotional high i mean you do/say things you wouldn't usually do becuase you have had enough and unfortnaulatry dont really know how to deal with it. too much suppressed emotion is getting the better of you.

how do you deal with this person? be angry with them? show that you are angry? no they seem to take no notice this therefore makes you even more angry.

so how about being nice to them? no, this would only give them the means of using you. they dont really care about you, they want the good stuff and spit out the core. you also cant be nice to them becuase you fear that your sort of being a user yourself or alittle cunning. but thats kind of the only way it will work.

generally you are not the person you are and its turning you into a monster imsad help.
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Hamza Asadullah
01-20-2011, 06:24 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
Defintion of oppression? that person doesn't really take your feelings into consideration and seems to do things to spite you. they seem to do things to compete with you. you really hate it and cant take it becuase you cant see any reason why you are a competition to them. generally you mind your own business :hmm:. heck, its draining the life out of you. you want to be your own person, but no stupid people and thier stupidness just cant help but butt in.

this leads you to an emotional high (yeah laugh why dont you) by emotional high i mean you do/say things you wouldn't usually do becuase you have had enough and unfortnaulatry dont really know how to deal with it. too much suppressed emotion is getting the better of you.

how do you deal with this person? be angry with them? show that you are angry? no they seem to take no notice this therefore makes you even more angry.

so how about being nice to them? no, this would only give them the means of using you. they dont really care about you, they want the good stuff and spit out the core. you also cant be nice to them becuase you fear that your sort of being a user yourself or alittle cunning. but thats kind of the only way it will work.

generally you are not the person you are and its turning you into a monster imsad help.
Asalaamu Alaikum, jazakallahu khayran for sharing. Can you be a bit more specific? Are you talking about your husband? Can you explain in more detail?
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tigerkhan
01-20-2011, 06:48 AM
^ if i say i feel such with my parents...!!!
actually this is bcz of difference of thinkng and the way u want to live. many things i take as a most important are useless to them.. what they are giving priorities is just a waste of money for me. i am in difficult situation.
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Hamza Asadullah
01-21-2011, 01:22 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by tigerkhan
^ if i say i feel such with my parents...!!!
actually this is bcz of difference of thinkng and the way u want to live. many things i take as a most important are useless to them.. what they are giving priorities is just a waste of money for me. i am in difficult situation.
Asalaamu Alaikum, brother are you the OP?
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tigerkhan
01-21-2011, 12:27 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Hamza81
Asalaamu Alaikum, brother are you the OP?
no brothre. i just say if u feel same pbm as described by OP with parents, then what can be the solution.
jazakAllah
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Hamza Asadullah
01-22-2011, 12:57 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by tigerkhan
no brothre. i just say if u feel same pbm as described by OP with parents, then what can be the solution.
jazakAllah
Asalaamu Aaikum, i am still waiting for the OP to answer my question before i can give any advice to them because it depends on the persons relationship with thhe person who is causing them the problems.

In regards to your question brother then can you give me some examples of how your parents treat you at times which you oppressive? What do you do in return currently or how do you deal with the situation? Do you have siblings and do you feel that they treated the same?
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tigerkhan
01-22-2011, 06:09 AM
^ brother i have never ever shared it with anyone in my life. bcz i dont want anyone to know about it. also its v.complex and long story. and i dont like to complain anyone about my parents disjust. even i never complain them what they are doing with me. i am just praying and learning sabr.
but pbm is that this thing had made me much and much bitter. i cant bear it anymore. it has made me dead. wallah i have no wish for anything in this world. u blv from years i never wish to eat something good, to wear something nice etc etc. i am just killing time. i have no feeling for my mother father or anyone else in this world. my parent know this that i have no heart relation with them but i am just dealing them for the sake of ALLAH SWT. what i have a sign of relief for me in my life is my ALLAH SWT. i am not hopless from HIM and just praying, and i hope one day He will listen to me.
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tigerkhan
01-22-2011, 06:29 AM
u know i was like a TIGER in path of dawa but i was broke by non-suporting behaviour of my parents in every aspect of life. from 2-3 years i never bayan/lecture in my masjid even to much insisting from the local people. alhumdulaih we are much strong relgiously and in dawa work. we have 3 aalims and 1 mufti in our masjid and i was much much active in dawa activites. we are of that passion that either our grave will become in path of ALLAH SWT or deen ISLAM will dominate in this world. please all u pray for me Allah SWT solve all my problems and accept all my life for the effort of His deen. ameen.
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Hamza Asadullah
01-22-2011, 03:27 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by tigerkhan
u know i was like a TIGER in path of dawa but i was broke by non-suporting behaviour of my parents in every aspect of life. from 2-3 years i never bayan/lecture in my masjid even to much insisting from the local people. alhumdulaih we are much strong relgiously and in dawa work. we have 3 aalims and 1 mufti in our masjid and i was much much active in dawa activites. we are of that passion that either our grave will become in path of ALLAH SWT or deen ISLAM will dominate in this world. please all u pray for me Allah SWT solve all my problems and accept all my life for the effort of His deen. ameen.
Asalaamu alaikum brother. What exactly is it that you feel your parents are doing to you or behavibg towards you for you to feel this way? If you don't like to share then i apologise for asking but it is the only way we can try and help you. If you feel more comfortable then you can PM me your issues.
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tigerkhan
01-23-2011, 02:22 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Hamza81
Asalaamu alaikum brother. What exactly is it that you feel your parents are doing to you or behavibg towards you for you to feel this way? If you don't like to share then i apologise for asking but it is the only way we can try and help you. If you feel more comfortable then you can PM me your issues.
brother hamza much much thanks for ur support. brother i am feeling u want to help me but i am not sure how it work. they are my parent. they are the cause of my birth and my up growing. its ok i am suffering bcz of their policies for past 3-4years and my life has got much dipressed but i am not so selfish that i can forgot what i have got bcz of them since my childhood. obviously they had sacrificed much. u know these pbms are just bcz of of differnece of thinking. eg we are living in combined family but i am not comfortable with my sister in laws. my sister in law is niece of my mather and my mom love her much. so i dont want that i bcm of reason of sperating them. so i am cutting myself from years just for their happiness. u know this just an example. my parents have done much like this that killed me from inside. u blv wallah now i am going to be 27 in comming march but wallah just only once in last few days my father ask me about my marriage. they have no care for me, rather they are busy in other wordly business. they are millionare but they never support me financilly however all my other bro and sister are just financially strong just bcz of their support. wallah u blv my mom even took money from me and give to my bro however he is married and he is not that needy as i am. u blv i am doing job from last 2.5 years and wallah half of my saving i had given to them...however they dont need actually. they have porperty of more than 200,00,000 PKR. but they cant give me just few lack so that i start business. i am alhumdulliah at good job but i wana go on business side. anyway i never complain them but u know its matter of hearts. my family know, internally i am not happy with them. anyway just pray for me bro. i had plan to move abroad (immigration) and insh will get rid of all this headace. wallah i dont love dunia but i want to work for deen but it bcz just bcz of them, i am wasting my life in so miserable way. my only and last hope is ALLAH SWT. plz u also pray for me.
thanks much for reading these lines. maybe u just got bit idea my prbms. if no, then plz forgive me. i told u its v.long story. i just write few lines so that u got an idea. blv b4 this i never share this with anyone. even now i am not saying i want my parent to go to hell bcz they are making my life miserable by not supporting me.wallah i have no offence for them. i pray for them in very salat. allah swt keep them happy, and i just pray allah swt also hear to my dua and grant me what i want.
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gladTidings
01-23-2011, 03:51 PM
This is a test for you brother, alhamdullilah that you have been patient so far and still continue to give to your parents with an open heart and when they are not needy. Your reward for that is with Allah swt inshAllah. However, if your parents refuse to support you then you must tawakkal in Allah and continue your own journey to make your own path in life. If your intentions are correct and you dont hurt your parents inshAllah, He will help you in your journey. May He make it easy for you. Ameen
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Hamza Asadullah
01-24-2011, 03:05 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by tigerkhan
brother hamza much much thanks for ur support. brother i am feeling u want to help me but i am not sure how it work. they are my parent. they are the cause of my birth and my up growing. its ok i am suffering bcz of their policies for past 3-4years and my life has got much dipressed but i am not so selfish that i can forgot what i have got bcz of them since my childhood. obviously they had sacrificed much. u know these pbms are just bcz of of differnece of thinking. eg we are living in combined family but i am not comfortable with my sister in laws. my sister in law is niece of my mather and my mom love her much. so i dont want that i bcm of reason of sperating them. so i am cutting myself from years just for their happiness. u know this just an example. my parents have done much like this that killed me from inside. u blv wallah now i am going to be 27 in comming march but wallah just only once in last few days my father ask me about my marriage. they have no care for me, rather they are busy in other wordly business. they are millionare but they never support me financilly however all my other bro and sister are just financially strong just bcz of their support. wallah u blv my mom even took money from me and give to my bro however he is married and he is not that needy as i am. u blv i am doing job from last 2.5 years and wallah half of my saving i had given to them...however they dont need actually. they have porperty of more than 200,00,000 PKR. but they cant give me just few lack so that i start business. i am alhumdulliah at good job but i wana go on business side. anyway i never complain them but u know its matter of hearts. my family know, internally i am not happy with them. anyway just pray for me bro. i had plan to move abroad (immigration) and insh will get rid of all this headace. wallah i dont love dunia but i want to work for deen but it bcz just bcz of them, i am wasting my life in so miserable way. my only and last hope is ALLAH SWT. plz u also pray for me.
thanks much for reading these lines. maybe u just got bit idea my prbms. if no, then plz forgive me. i told u its v.long story. i just write few lines so that u got an idea. blv b4 this i never share this with anyone. even now i am not saying i want my parent to go to hell bcz they are making my life miserable by not supporting me.wallah i have no offence for them. i pray for them in very salat. allah swt keep them happy, and i just pray allah swt also hear to my dua and grant me what i want.
Asalaamu Alaikum, jazakallahu khayran for sharing your issues. My dear brother it is painful when ones family acts in this way but surely whatever his destined for you in regards to money and wealth will come to you even if the whole world were to try to stop it they would not be able to. Therefore rejoice and know that NOTHING will stop what is decreed for you. Thank Allah whatever he gives you abundantley. Also rejoice for the fact that you are being tested and if you endure the test for the pleasure of Allah continuing to be most respectful to your parents and family aswell as treating them the best and making dua for them always then surely there will be a great reward available for you on the day of judgement. When you see this reward you will wish you were tested even more just so that you can taste the sweetness on that day. My brother also make excuses for your parents behaviour and do not let shaythan put enmity in your heart for them. Surely your parents do love you no matter what even if they treated you differently but that does not take away their love for you. Do not let shaythan make you angry and crate hatred in your heart for them. Be lucky that you have parents and wealth and property for most have nothing compared to what you have as i am sure you are aware of in Pakistan.

So my brother always look at your parents in a good light and make excuses in your heart and mind for them. Do not let shaythan create enmity and hatred in your heart for them. Regardless of how they treat you treat them the best. Is your reward with your parents or with Allah? It is only between you and Allah so see this as a blessing in disguise that Allah is wanting you closer to him. See this as HUGE rewards and best of all the pleasure of Allah for your patience and reliance and trust in him. See this as Allah wanting you closer to him.

Also it may be that if you endure these tests and pass all of the othr tests that come your way in life then on the day of judgement you may have little or no sins when facing Allah. So my brother know that NO one can stop whatever wealth and property is decreed for you. So make the best of this situation and be patient and trust in Allah. Also the amount of rewards that are available for you serving your parents is too much to imagine. If you serve your parents for the pleasure of Allah until they or you are gone from this world then the rewards that will be awaiting you on the day of judgement are unimaginable. Therefore think of this situation in trms of HUGE rewards and being able to gain closeness to Allah and his pleasure. That is all that matters. Whatever is decreed for you will come inshallah. Thank Allah more for he gives more to those who are appreciative and thankful.

May Allah give you the best of this world and the hereafter.

And Allah knows best in all matters
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tigerkhan
01-24-2011, 09:38 AM
i know there is no solution other than to be patient...anyway jazakallah for ur replies. thank you so much for ur support.
u blv i dont know y somewhere in my mind, i have feeling of myself as responsible for all that. bcz i know allah swt has given parents too much right over their children. i remember a hadith, once a Suhabi RA come to Prophet PBUH and said that my father used to spent my money in their circumtances. is this right. Prophet PBUH said to him that u and ur money all is of ur father. u know i had left all thing for ALLAH and jannah but this chapter of deen is becomming so so difficult for me and its make me much depressed. i am fearing Allah SWT dont get unhappy and angry with me bcz of this and all what i am struggling will go in vain. i wish kash asa na hota. my parent dont hurt me that much. i can sever them in better way if they care me a bit. but now i know the only solution is
you must tawakkal in Allah and continue your own journey to make your own path in life
allah swt has put me in v.severe test. plz pray for me.
wasalam...
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Hamza Asadullah
01-24-2011, 08:47 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by tigerkhan
i know there is no solution other than to be patient...anyway jazakallah for ur replies. thank you so much for ur support.
u blv i dont know y somewhere in my mind, i have feeling of myself as responsible for all that. bcz i know allah swt has given parents too much right over their children. i remember a hadith, once a Suhabi RA come to Prophet PBUH and said that my father used to spent my money in their circumtances. is this right. Prophet PBUH said to him that u and ur money all is of ur father. u know i had left all thing for ALLAH and jannah but this chapter of deen is becomming so so difficult for me and its make me much depressed. i am fearing Allah SWT dont get unhappy and angry with me bcz of this and all what i am struggling will go in vain. i wish kash asa na hota. my parent dont hurt me that much. i can sever them in better way if they care me a bit. but now i know the only solution is allah swt has put me in v.severe test. plz pray for me.
wasalam...
Asalaamu Alaikum, my brother you should never say that Allah has given parents too much rights what ever Allah has ordained is perfect and we must never question his wisdom. Even though Allah has given so much rights to parents they are still oppressed by their own children and their rights are still not fulfilled. They are vulnerable in their old age so they are entitle to the rights they are given. You must never question the wisdom of Allah just because you feel your parents are not fulfilling your rights.

The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) is reported to have said:

"Indeed, gentleness adds more beauty to the atmosphere it reposes therein." (Muslim)

Hadhrat Ibn Abbas (RA) narrates from the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam)that a person whose parents are alive and he obeys them, listens to and respects them, then Allah will open two doors of paradise for him. But if one of his parents is not happy with him, then Allah will not be happy with him either. Then someone asked the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) , “Even if they are oppressors?” The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) replied, “Yes, even if they are oppressors.”

You should have a serious word with them in a gentle and loving manner using wisdom and tact sharing with them exactley how you feel and that you are very upset and are just trying to make them understand what you are going through. If this does not work then you should speak to an elder of the family to speak to your parents to try and make them understand. Also continue to ask of Allah in dua for their hearts to be softened and for this issue to be resolved but to question the wisdom of Allah saying they are given too many rights is the worst thing you can do for Allah has given everyone the rights they are entitled to and nothing more or less but the perfect number of rights.

Above all, this requires patience and self-restraint. Learn about the tremendousness of being good to one's parents, and keep this in mind.

When troubled, tried, or tested, turn to Allah in earnest, heart-felt supplication (dua), for He has told us to, "Call upon Me: I will answer you."


The fire of anger is put out by the water of love: respond to her harshness with love, and soon you will find things changing.

Allah told the Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) in the Qur'an:


003.159 It was by the mercy of Allah that You were lenient with them, for if You had been stern and fierce of heart they would have dispersed from round about thee. So pardon them and ask forgiveness for them and consult with them upon the conduct of affairs. And when You art resolved, then put your trust in Allah. Lo! Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him).

003.160 If Allah is your helper none can overcome you, and if He withdraw His help from you, who is there who can help you after Him? In Allah let believers put their trust.
Allah, the exalted, ordered us to treat them kindly even when they try to make us associate partners to Allah.

When being kind to one’s parents, we do not expect a reward from them, but we expect a reward from Allah.

If the parents are not kind and do not appreciate the kindness of their children, then one has to be patient, bearing the difficulties and be steadfast in doing good to them, and the outcome will be good, Insha Allah.

And Allah alone gives success and knows best in all matters.
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Hamza Asadullah
01-24-2011, 08:48 PM
What does Islam say about "mothers"?

This is one of the most convincing things about Islam - the treatment of women in general and especially the high position mothers hold in Islam.

Amongst the clearest examples of Islam's honoring women is the great status of the mother in Islam. Islam commands kindness, respect and obedience to parents and specifically emphasizes and gives preference to the mother as shall be shown in this article. Islam raises parents to a status greater than that found in any other religion or ideology.

The command to be good to one's parents begins right from the Qur'an. Allah says:

"Worship God and join not any partners with Him; and be kind to your parents..." [Noble Quran 4:36]

The mention of servitude to parents follows immediately after servitude to God. This is repeated throughout the Qur'an.

"Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him and that you be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor. And out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility and say, "My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood." [Noble Quran 17:23-24]

The great scholar, Abu al-Faraj Ibn Al-Jawzî (d. 1201CE) explained:

To be kind to one's parents is: to obey them when they order you to do something, unless it is something which Allah has forbidden; to give priority to their orders over voluntary acts of worship; to abstain from that which they forbid you to do; to provide for them; to serve them; to approach them with gentle humility and mercy; not to raise your voice in front of them; nor to fix your glance on them; nor to call them by their names; and to be patient with them. (Ibn al-Jawzî, Birr al-Wâlidayn)

The Qur'an emphasizes the great struggles the mother goes through for her child, to highlight the need for one to reciprocate their parents sacrifice for them:

"And We have enjoined on man [to be good] to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him and his weaning was over two years. Be thankful to Me and to your parents, unto Me is the final destination." [Noble Quran 31:14]

The renowned exegete, Shaykh Abdur-Rahman As-Sa'di (d. 1956), says about this verse:

{And to your parents} meaning, be kind to your parents, shower on them love, affection and piety, both in words and deeds, treat them with tender humility, provide for them and never harm them verbally nor physically. [...] Then, Allah mentions the reason why we should be kind to our parents, when He says {His mother bore him in travail upon travail}, that is, the mother bore constant suffering; in pain and hardship from the first moment she felt the child moving in her womb to the worst pangs during the time of delivery. And {his weaning is for two years}, that is, during these two years the mother breast-feeds her child and looks after him/her. So after all the years of suffering, hardship, love and care, could we not, at least, compensate our mothers for what they have done for us and pay them back their rights? (Taysîr al-Karîm ar-Rahmân fî Tafsîr al-Kalâm al-Manân)

The Qur'an repeats its mention of the struggles of the mother in yet another passage:

"And We have enjoined upon man, to his parents, good treatment. His mother carried him with hardship and gave birth to him with hardship, and his gestation and weaning [period] is thirty months. [He grows] until, when he reaches maturity and reaches [the age of] forty years, he says, "My Lord, enable me to be grateful for Your favor which You have bestowed upon me and upon my parents and to work righteousness of which You will approve and make righteous for me my offspring. Indeed, I have repented to You, and indeed, I am of the Muslims." [Noble Quran 46:15]

In connection to this passage, the late Grand Mufti of Pakistan, Shaykh Muhammad Shafy (d. 1976) wrote:

Mother has more rights than father

Although the first part of this verse is a command to do good to both the parents, the second sentence refers only to the hardships suffered by the mother, because they are unavoidable, and no child can be born without them. Every mother has to go through the problems of pregnancy and severe pains of delivery. As against this, it is not necessary for a father that he suffers any hardship in bringing up and educating the child, if he can afford to pay somebody else for these services. This is why the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) has given more rights to the mother than anybody else. According to a hadîth he has said,

"Do good to and serve your mother, then your mother, then your mother, then your father, then the near relatives and then those who come after them." [Mazhari]

"And his carrying and his weaning is in thirty months" [Noble Quran 46:15]

This sentence too describes the hardships suffered by the mother for her baby. It points out that even after suffering hardships during pregnancy and the severe labor pains, the mother does not get respite from toils, because the natural food of the infants is in her breasts, and she has to suckle them. (Shafy, Ma'âriful Qur'ân [Eng. trans.], vol. 7, pp. 795-796)

The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) continually used to remind his followers of the status of the mother and the obligation of being good to one's parents. The following narration is a beautiful example of the noble position of the mother:

A man came to the Prophet and said: O Messenger of Allah! Who from amongst mankind warrants the best companionship from me? He replied: "Your mother." The man asked: Then who? So he replied: "Your mother." The man then asked: Then who? So the Prophet replied again: "Your mother." The man then asked: Then who? So he replied: "Then your father." (Sahîh Bukhârî 5971 and Sahîh Muslim 7/2)

The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) also said in a famous narration:

'Paradise lies at the feet of your mother' [Musnad Ahmad, Sunan An-Nasâ’i, Sunan Ibn Mâjah]

What can be greater evidence of honoring women than this? Islam has effectively placed the ultimate reward for human beings in their devotion to their mothers.

Shaykh Ibrahîm Ibn Sâlih Al-Mahmud writes:

Treat your mother with the best companionship, then your father; because paradise is under the mother's feet. Never disobey your parents, nor make them angry, otherwise you will live a miserable life in this world and the hereafter, and your children will treat you likewise. Ask your parents gently if you need something. Always thank them if they give it to you, and excuse them if they do not, and never insist on a matter if they refuse to give you something. (Al-Mahmoud, How to be kind to your Parents, p.40)

It is related from Talhah ibn Mu'âwiyah as-Salamî who said:

I came to the Prophet and said, "O Messenger of Allah, I want to perform Jihad in the way of Allah. He asked, "Is your mother alive?" I replied, "Yes." The Prophet then said: "Cling to her feet, because paradise is there." (at-Tabarânî).

Shaykh Nidhaam Sakkijihaa comments:

Cling to her feet means to submit yourself to her, be close to her, protect her, serve her because in this is Paradise and with her satisfaction you will enjoy the good blessings of Allah. (Sakkijihaa, Honoring the Parents, p. 52)

The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) showed us the importance of serving one's parents in the following narration reported by Abdullah Ibn Mas'ud:

I asked the Prophet, 'O Messenger of Allah, what is the best deed?' He replied 'Prayer offered on time.' I asked, 'What is next in goodness?' He replied, 'To be dutiful and kind to one's parents.' I further asked, 'What is next in goodness?' He replied, 'Jihad in the Allah's cause. [Sahîh Bukhârî, Sahîh Muslim]

Just as the Prophet said that kindness to one's parents was of the best deeds, he also said that disobedience to them was amongst the major sins:

"The greatest sins are to associate partners in worship with Allah, to be undutiful or unkind to one's parents, to kill a soul forbidden by Allah and to bear false witness." [Sahîh Bukhârî]

Even after the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him), the Muslim scholars continued to stress the importance of being dutiful to one's mother. By examining the conduct and teachings of the early Muslim scholars, one may see how the direct recipients of the Islamic message understood the command to be dutiful to one's parents. Their behavior towards their parents shows Muslims how one is to implement the teachings of the Prophet on honoring parents.

Abdullah Ibn Abbâs (d. 687CE), a companions of the Prophet and a great scholar of Islam, considered kind treatment of one's mother to be the best deed for strengthening or rectifying one's relation with God. He said:

I know of no other deed that brings people closer to Allah than kind treatment and respect towards one's mother. [Al-Adab al-Mufrad Bukhârî 1/45]

An even more powerful example is found in the statement of another one of the Prophet's companions, Abdullah Ibn 'Umar (d. 692CE), who was also a great scholar of Islam. It has been related that:

Abdullah Ibn 'Umar saw a Yemeni man performing Tawâf (circumambulating the Ka'bah) while carrying his mother on his back. This man said to Abdullah Ibn 'Umar, "I am like a tame camel for her! I have carried her more than she carried me. Do you think I have paid her back, O Ibn 'Umar?" Abdullah Ibn 'Umar replied, "No, not even one contraction!!" [Al-Adab al-Mufrad Bukhârî 1/62]

SubhânAllah (Glory be to God)! The efforts of a man who carries his mother on his back while performing tawâf cannot even repay his mother for a single contraction that she went through for him. Wise indeed was Ibn 'Umar's reply to this man to show him how massively indebted he was to his mother. This is the tremendous value and prestigious position of mothers in Islam!

Yet another example is found in the following prophecy of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him):

There will come to you with reinforcements from Yemen a man called Uways ibn 'Âmir of the clan of Murâd from the tribe of Qaran. He had leprosy but has been cured of it except for a spot the size of a coin. He has a mother and he has always treated her with kindness and respect. If he prays to Allah, Allah will fulfill his wish. If you can ask him to pray for forgiveness for you, then do so. [Sahîh Muslim 16/95]

Indeed, later on 'Umar ibn al-Khattâb met Uways who was exactly as the Prophet described, and upon 'Umar's request Uways prayed for him. Commenting on this narration, Shaykh Muhammad Ali Al-Hashimî writes:

What a high status Uways reached by virtue of his kindness and respect towards his mother, so that the Prophet recommended his Sahabah [companions] to seek him out and ask him to pray for them!

All of this indicates the high status to which Islam has raised the position of motherhood, and given the mother precedence over the father. At the same time, Islam has given importance to both parents, and has enjoined kindness and respect to both. (Al-Hashimi, The Ideal Muslimah, IIPH 2005, p. 167)

So great was the Islamic emphasis on parents, that the Muslims considered a great opportunity to attain paradise in service to one's mother. Iyâs Ibn Mu'âwiyah was a famous Islamic scholar from the second generation of Muslims. When his mother died, Iyâs Ibn Mu'âwiyah cried. He was asked, "Why do you cry?" He said, "I used to have two gates open to Paradise, now one of them is closed."

Zayn al-'Abidîn (d. 713CE) was the great grandson of the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) and also a renowned scholar. He used to treat his mother with so much kindness and love as seen in the following narration:

Once he was asked, 'You are the most kind person to his mother, yet we have never seen you eating with her from a single dish.' He replied, 'I fear that my hand would take the what her eyes have already seen in the dish, and then I would be disobeying her'. [At-Tartushi, Birr al-Wâlidayn]

In other words, he was so careful not to disobey his mother that he would even avoid eating out of the same plate as her; He thought that she would see a morsel and intend to take it, but before she did he might unknowingly take that same morsel and eat it. This is how careful he was to obey his mother in the most minute details.

Another early Islamic scholar, Sa'îd Ibn Al-Musayyib (d. 709CE), was asked about the meaning of the verse "but address them in terms of honor" (17:23). Sa'îd Ibn Al-Musayyib replied:

It means that you should address them as a servant addresses his master.

Muhammad Ibn Sirîn (d. 729CE) used to speak to his mother in a very soft voice, out of respect for her. He was also often seen in the company of his mother and looking after her. (Ibn al-Jawzî, Birr al-Wâlidayn)

All that has preceded shows how the status of mothers - and consequently that of women - is elevated to the highest position in Islam. The honor Islam has given to mothers is beyond that found in any other religion, ideology or culture. This is clear proof of the lofty status of Muslim Women.
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