format_quote Originally Posted by
Shazreen
Assalamualaikum. I'm a Muslim sister and alhamdulillah I pray 5 times daily. And my concern is that my brother and sister do not do the same. They are 17 and 15 respectively.
Please help me on what I should do to make them realize. I always talk to them about Islam but it doesn't seem to work. I always put on religious channels with hopes that they would realize it. I also always pray to Allah SWT so that He will give them hidayah.
Please help me, thank you very much. Jazakumullahu khair.
Asalaamu Alaikum, My sister I am sure there are many of us who are in the same position as you having certain family members who are not practising. Guidance is ONLY in the hands of Allah and although it is very hurtful to see a family member not practising we can only do so much to inform them for that is all we can do.
Take the following steps:
1. You must not constantly nag at them to pray or practise everyday otherwise it will cause your siblings to start to ignore you and it will just go in one year and come out of the other.
Therefore just back off a little and give them a little space. Never get frustrated at them or start shouting at them as this will never work. Whenever you approach them then do so with gentleness using wisdom and tact in your approach.
2. Just remind them no more than once a week about the importance of Salaah and why as Muslims we should pray it and practise our deen etc. This way whatever you will say will be more effective than saying it all of the time.
In your reminders try to establish the importance of sticking with good friends who are practising and have good character and morals. At that age especially one needs a role model. Rather than them looking upto celebrities etc Try to tell them about the life of our Prophet (Salallahu Alaihi Wasallam) and examples of his life what made him so unique and amazing as a person. Try to also emphasise the fact that our role model is Rasulallah (Salallahu Alaihi Wasallam) and he is the best role model for the whole of mankind.
2. Do twice weekly short reminders to your family from a good and reliable like for eg. Riyaad-us-saaliheen especially when you can see your siblings sitting nearby. Do not sit in front of them and start reading but read a bit away from them. They may not come to you and listen at first but eventually they will or they may just catch a glimpse of what you are saying and become more and more interested. Let them listen out of choice and not by force. Make the readings 15 minutes and no more.
3. When the family are sitting around then put it on an Islamic channel and if there is a good lecture on then you should all lsiten to it and benefit from it inshallah.
4. Try to send your siblings weekly Islamic reminders by text and e mail. Make the texts short but heart hitting quotes, hadith, ayahs etc
5. Do not treat your siblings like little children or nag at them constantly otherwise they will go further away from deen and whatever you want them to do. They will just end up rebelling against you and that is the last thing you want to do. Start treating them like young adults even if you don't see them as one yet.
6. Pray Nafil prayers to Allah and make much dua to Allah especially at Tahajjud time that Allah guides them and brings them closer to Allah and deen.
7. Try to give them reminders of death and the hereafter at least once a week as death is the destroyer of all pleasures and brings one into reality.
It will also instill fear into their hearts especially from committing major sins like relationships which lead to fornication, drinking, drugs etc as that is the age when desires are at their strongest and one is at their most vulnerable from attack from shaythan.
So give them moral support and let them know you are there for them and that you will be there for them and get them through whatever issue they are going through in life.
Make them aware they must not anger Allah and refrain from anything which angers or displeases him.
8. Sometimes teens go through phases like this where they are experiencing the new world out there and also their desires come live so it is not easy for them either. But try to be understanding and patient and trust in Allah.
9. Try to find the right opportunity and sit with your siblings maybe individually and talk to them. Get them to open up more and trust you enough to share with you what goes on in their lives. This way you can get to the bottom of what they are feeling and what is stopping them from getting into deen and praying.
10. You can only do so much. You cannot force anyone to pray or go towards deen. You can only do your best as a sibling to inform them. Do not blame yourself as you have done everything you could do but continue with these steps and something good will come out of this inshallah.
You need to also concentrate on yourself as time is so short and our lives can end at ANY second. Therefore strive to get closer to Allah and worship him as much as you can doing EVERYTHING in your daily life to please Allah and refraining from anything which
displeases him.
These articles wil help you to try and get your siblings into Islam and will also help you to maximise the amount of good deeds you do everyday inshallah:
10 Steps to Increasing our Iman(Faith)
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...man-faith.html (10 Steps to Increasing our Iman(Faith))
30 ways the youth should spend everyday of their lives!
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...eir-lives.html (30 ways the youth should spend everyday of their lives!)
Easy Dhikr which is light on the tongue but heavy on the scales!
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...vy-scales.html (Easy Dhikr which is light on the tongue but heavy on the scales!)
My Daily Ibadah (worship) check!
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...hip-check.html (My Daily Ibadah (worship) check!)
10 steps to getting closer to Allah
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...ser-allah.html (10 steps to getting closer to Allah)
Forty Very Easy, Quick & Rewarding Good Deeds for all of us to do Everyday!
http://www.islamicboard.com/worship-...-everyday.html (Forty Very Easy, Quick & Rewarding Good Deeds for all of us to do Everyday!)
VERY Rewarding Nafl Salaahs we can Pray Everyday!
http://www.islamicboard.com/worship-...-everyday.html (VERY Rewarding Nafl Salaahs we can Pray Everyday!)
Wasting Time is worse than Death!
http://www.islamicboard.com/general/...han-death.html
The Effects of Good deeds will remain forever!!!
http://www.islamicboard.com/general/...n-forever.html
Want to see the REAL appearance of Almighty Allah everyday?
http://www.islamicboard.com/general/...-everyday.html
12 Ways We Can Maximise Our Worship Each Day
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...-each-day.html
Have You Ever Tasted Jannah?
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...ed-jannah.html
Here are some very beneficial lectures to increase your imaan and fear of Allah:
AMAZING short speech -"The Goodly Life"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fugf1DcNyc
Remembrance: ask Allah for his forgiveness
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-EK9r3rMzQ
Angel of Death!!! - Sheikh Ahmed Ali
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUzRJXlB2uA
HARD HITTING Lecture on HELLFIRE & the Day of JUDGEMENT! يوم القيامة والجحيم
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O6L_fBk7VM
Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 1/3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWTehIeCOUU
Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 2/3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXTtk7rWx_U
Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 3/3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmiD86w9fBc
Islam - Punishment of the Grave by Sheikh Riyadh ul Haq
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWb-hYIm2WE
Death and the Grave by Murtaza Khan
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7r2nzJVecqo
How can we not appreciate what we have after watching this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkEBUC0APMg
I hope Allah gives you and your siblings and family the best of this world and the hereafter. Ameen
And Allah knows best in all matters