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Ansariyah
04-09-2011, 11:54 AM
I need Advice n some help possibly...

Due to unforeseeable circumstances one of my Converse shoes fell of the balcony into our neighbours backyard. They are on the ground floor.
I've been going to their door pretty much everyday hoping someone would give me back my shoe....but no one answered the door.

On the balcony While we were all having breakfast this morning I noticed that my shoe disappeared. So we assumed that the people probably came back home and we thought it would be a good time to go ask about my shoe. My lil 8 year old sista wanted to go and ask. When she asked about the shoe they said to her 'We will not give you back the shoe, we will throw it in the pond behind our home or the bin! My lil sista shocked told us that she said 'Its our shoe all u have to do is give it back' They slammed the door at her face. When she told me the story, I said I will go there! This house is my sisters home (we were visiting) so my brother inlaw said that he will go there n deal with them. When he went there the lady gave him an ear'full of nonsense while he stood there being nice to her. He came back home and told us wat happened, I couldnt believe it! I wanted to go there personally and get my shoe back! My brotha inlaw stopped me and said. Let her cool off. Let me remind u all that my shoe has been in their backyard for atleast a good 5 days, thank god it didnt get rained on, but they did throw it to where its less clean. These shoes were new too..

I said to my family that I would like to call the police. The reason I wanted to call the police is, really wats left? Its not like we are dealing with a rational adult here? But they talked me out of it.

Cause we found out today that the lady whos acting like that is actually the daughter of the owner (who btw passed away a week ago which we didnt even know). The reason no one opened the door is because they were dealing with the death etc no one was home. Our other neighbour told us this. I felt bad for the woman so me and my lil sista n my olda sista decided to go back there and just give them our condolences. When we went to their door the lady gave us nasty look. My big sista said 'Our condolences" Sorry about what happened. Then she said 'u done'?, my sista still kept it together and mentioned that as neighbours we are paying respect to our neighbours (btw that woman is jst visiting the old people who live there. The old people are my sisters proper neighbours).

She didnt even give us respect, she slammed the door while we stood there. We didnt really go there for the shoe, but i'm not gonna lie part of me was hoping that she would just give me my freaking shoe!

She never did!

I really wanted to say a few things but my sista stopped me from talking. Wat does she think is gonna happen? That i'm not gonna see her ugly face again, after she slams the door! We will surely come across. I'm honestly fed up, its not even about the shoe anymore. Its about how she spoke to my lil sista, whos a child. Shes nothing but Haughty Anti-Islamic racist on a power trip who feels safe cause shes indoors, a coward.

Wats a girl to do?
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Alpha Dude
04-09-2011, 01:42 PM
:sl:

I think you should wait for the woman to leave and then ask the elderly people who live there for it. It's clear this lady won't oblige.
Reply

YusufNoor
04-09-2011, 02:01 PM
:sl:

they're sneakers, get over it!

there a funny scene in Dances With Wolves when Dunbar notices one of the tribe wearing his hat. when asked why he had the hat, the warrior says,

"he [meaning Dunbar] didn't want it any more, he left it on the ground(!)"

:threadclo


j/k

Allah decreed the situation, now you figure out why. make dua for the poor old lady. she's close to her own personal Qiyama and your worried about a fifty dollar pair of sneakers. which will be of more concern to you on THE Day of Qiyama?

and watch this video by Mufti Menk:

http://www.video.vietgiaitri.com/xem...IA3pipTQ0Y.vgt

:wa:
Reply

Cabdullahi
04-09-2011, 02:18 PM
you shouldn't have got converse....if you didn't, this would not have happened


you shoulda got k-swiss


as a goodwill gesture buy her a pair of pink k-swiss trainers......the only way you can defeat arrogance is through benevolence


May Allah guide you and keep you strong yannie!
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marwen
04-09-2011, 02:25 PM
Go to visit that old lady and give her a present without mentionning the story of the shoes, and I'm sure she will give it back to you. :D
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yas2010
04-09-2011, 03:28 PM
the only way you can defeat arrogance is through benevolence
Brother a beautiful quote.
Reply

Dagless
04-09-2011, 03:50 PM
As people have said, you can try asking for the shoe when the nasty woman is out.

If they won't give it back, you could consult a lawyer. It's still your property, and there is a principle to uphold! You should have taped her when she said she was going to throw it away because then you would have proof that she has it and will damage it.

If all that fails you could always spend the next few weeks rearranging your furniture... during the night :D (yes, I am cruel).



Or you could just forget about it, after all it's only a shoe ;)
Reply

Perseveranze
04-09-2011, 04:04 PM
After being that nice.. I would honestly jump over and get that shoe back. But don't take my advice, it's horrible but just me.
Reply

Yahya_Ajam
04-09-2011, 04:06 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Dagless
you could always spend the next few weeks rearranging your furniture... during the night (yes, I am cruel).
This idea, I think is your best bet. ;) I'm just kidding.

Like everybody else said, either wait until that woman is gone or just forget the shoe :(
Reply

Hannah.
04-09-2011, 04:23 PM
Be a lil more patient sis, and give her a few more days. Maybe buy a little something to cheer her up?
Reply

peace_maker
04-09-2011, 04:52 PM
Don't bother 'bout the shoe cause I think she had already thrown it away.(no offence)

Maybe she thinks that you threw the shoe there on purpose. You know, maybe she thought that you were happy about her father's death and threw the shoe to tease or taunt.

I know it's hard but, forget about the shoe.
Reply

Haya emaan
04-09-2011, 05:13 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Perseveranze
After being that nice.. I would honestly jump over and get that shoe back. But don't take my advice, it's horrible but just me.
the first thought came into my mind reading the first post...:p

If all that fails you could always spend the next few weeks rearranging your furniture... during the night
:D
Reply

aadil77
04-09-2011, 06:02 PM
unless they were quite pricey shoes I'd leave it
Reply

PouringRain
04-09-2011, 08:24 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Yanoorah

I'm honestly fed up, its not even about the shoe anymore. Its about how she spoke to my lil sista, whos a child. Shes nothing but Haughty Anti-Islamic racist on a power trip who feels safe cause shes indoors, a coward.

Wats a girl to do?
I agree with you that it isn't even about the shoe anymore. I also agree with your assessment of the woman. But shoe aside, all you can do is move forward and forgive. As you said, you will not see her anymore, because you are visiting. You also mentioned that her father who passed away is the owner of the building. The building, then, basically belongs to the woman's family, and your sister and her husband are tenets there, from what I gather from your post. Your sister probably stopped you from speaking out to the woman 1) because your sister is probably a nice person , but 2) because your sister may be concerned about causing trouble with the woman whose family owns the building.

You feel an injustice has been done, and rightfully so. There is nothing that can be done at this point to resolve the situation. You have made attempts to be considerate of what the woman is going through, and your efforts were repaid with ugliness from the woman. Getting back at her, or speaking unkindly, will only aggravate the situation and prove in her mind that she is right about you. It also could cause continued problems for your sister who lives there. You must forgive and move forward, for your own mental health, and for the concern of your family.

It is unfortunate that there are so many ugly people out there. None of this was worth your time, money, efforts, or the space it took up in your mental activity.

Reply

Ansariyah
04-10-2011, 12:39 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by PouringRain
I agree with you that it isn't even about the shoe anymore. I also agree with your assessment of the woman. But shoe aside, all you can do is move forward and forgive. As you said, you will not see her anymore, because you are visiting. You also mentioned that her father who passed away is the owner of the building. The building, then, basically belongs to the woman's family, and your sister and her husband are tenets there, from what I gather from your post. Your sister probably stopped you from speaking out to the woman 1) because your sister is probably a nice person , but 2) because your sister may be concerned about causing trouble with the woman whose family owns the building.

You feel an injustice has been done, and rightfully so. There is nothing that can be done at this point to resolve the situation. You have made attempts to be considerate of what the woman is going through, and your efforts were repaid with ugliness from the woman. Getting back at her, or speaking unkindly, will only aggravate the situation and prove in her mind that she is right about you. It also could cause continued problems for your sister who lives there. You must forgive and move forward, for your own mental health, and for the concern of your family.

It is unfortunate that there are so many ugly people out there. None of this was worth your time, money, efforts, or the space it took up in your mental activity.

Hi pouringrain

^Let me clarify some things :

She doesnt own the building. My sista owns her own house, shes not that womans tenent. Alhamdulilah.

To clarify another thing quickly: My sista didnt stop me from talking cause shes concerned about any trouble with that woman.

and its that womans mother that died not her dad.

This woman is evil person. If we dont do something she will think she won.

thanks for ur advice, i appreciate it
Reply

Ansariyah
04-10-2011, 01:07 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Yahya_Ajam
This idea, I think is your best bet. ;) I'm just kidding.

Like everybody else said, either wait until that woman is gone or just forget the shoe :(
Shes a nightmare, but shes not scaring me!

format_quote Originally Posted by aadil77
unless they were quite pricey shoes I'd leave it
They actually were very pricey, to say the least...but honestly Its not about that. Its about how she treated us, n everytime I go to the balcony I see my shoe laying there near the pond. Who knows even a dog licked it, or god knows wats finding shelter inside of it.^o)

format_quote Originally Posted by Hannah.
Be a lil more patient sis, and give her a few more days. Maybe buy a little something to cheer her up?
I wouldnt mind talking to the old man whos wife died, hes a nice man. But that woman doesnt deserve any gifts from me. She might even think thats a cheap shot at getting my shoe back, who knows? I dont like kissing up to people.

format_quote Originally Posted by Dagless
As people have said, you can try asking for the shoe when the nasty woman is out.

If they won't give it back, you could consult a lawyer. It's still your property, and there is a principle to uphold! You should have taped her when she said she was going to throw it away because then you would have proof that she has it and will damage it.

If all that fails you could always spend the next few weeks rearranging your furniture... during the night :D (yes, I am cruel).



Or you could just forget about it, after all it's only a shoe ;)
lol nice idea:p

I will teach that woman a lesson, one way or another.

format_quote Originally Posted by marwen
Go to visit that old lady and give her a present without mentionning the story of the shoes, and I'm sure she will give it back to you. :D
Give her gift? this woman is so evil, u know when u see her face u would know wat I mean. SubahanAllah. When I went there with my sisters to pay respect to her dead mother, she slammed the door in our face. My sister, her kids, and her husband are really lovely people. Why shes spitting so much venom at us I dont know. The only thing I know is that we all wear Hijab.

format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
you shouldn't have got converse....if you didn't, this would not have happened


you shoulda got k-swiss


as a goodwill gesture buy her a pair of pink k-swiss trainers......the only way you can defeat arrogance is through benevolence

May Allah guide you and keep you strong yannie!
I only rock converse, I'm loyal like that.=)

ameen to ur dua!

format_quote Originally Posted by YusufNoor
:sl:

they're sneakers, get over it!

there a funny scene in Dances With Wolves when Dunbar notices one of the tribe wearing his hat. when asked why he had the hat, the warrior says,

"he [meaning Dunbar] didn't want it any more, he left it on the ground(!)"

:threadclo


j/k

Allah decreed the situation, now you figure out why. make dua for the poor old lady. she's close to her own personal Qiyama and your worried about a fifty dollar pair of sneakers. which will be of more concern to you on THE Day of Qiyama?

and watch this video by Mufti Menk:

http://www.video.vietgiaitri.com/xem...IA3pipTQ0Y.vgt

:wa:
Yeah they are only sneakers true'say. Its not a big deal but that woman disrespected my family. Everytime I go to the balcony I cant forget wat happened lol. Tnx for the advice anyway.

format_quote Originally Posted by Bedouin
:sl:

I think you should wait for the woman to leave and then ask the elderly people who live there for it. It's clear this lady won't oblige.
If I lost my shoe I could forget about it, but the way this all went. Knowing that she can easily give me my shoe back and that shes stooping so low is. Is so Crazy!
Reply

PouringRain
04-10-2011, 05:15 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Yanoorah


Hi pouringrain

^Let me clarify some things :

She doesnt own the building. My sista owns her own house, shes not that womans tenent. Alhamdulilah.


To clarify another thing quickly: My sista didnt stop me from talking cause shes concerned about any trouble with that woman.

and its that womans mother that died not her dad.

This woman is evil person. If we dont do something she will think she won.

thanks for ur advice, i appreciate it
Oh good! That is great that your sister is not living in that woman's building. It would be awful to have a landlord who is like that.

The problem with your words "she will think she won" is that in a situation like this there really are no winners. Retaliation never solves anything.
Reply

Ansariyah
04-11-2011, 12:34 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by PouringRain
Oh good! That is great that your sister is not living in that woman's building. It would be awful to have a landlord who is like that.

The problem with your words "she will think she won" is that in a situation like this there really are no winners. Retaliation never solves anything.
Guess waaat?

I got my shoe back, anddd it seems to be in good condition though it laid there for days. :muddlehea

Last night I said to everyone 'I give up on that shoe' For Allahs sake. I honestly didnt want it anymore. Its not liek those shoes are the only shoes I have.

This morning my sista saw their door open, the old man was there. She told him about the shoe and he seemed very shocked. Apparently his 'evil' daughter didnt inform him what shes been upto. He apologized, and gave my sista the shoe back. That old man is really an awesome human being mashaAllah, too bad that his daughter didnt inherit his kidndness....but oh well. Thats life.

Gosh, has my patience been tested or wat=)

Peaceee
Reply

elina
04-11-2011, 01:00 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Perseveranze
After being that nice.. I would honestly jump over and get that shoe back. But don't take my advice, it's horrible but just me.

so would i if im honest..... after all we are talking cons here not just any old shoe :'(
Reply

elina
04-11-2011, 01:03 PM
ah just saw your last post sis.... what a nice old guy :) good that you got it back :)
Reply

PouringRain
04-11-2011, 05:46 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Yanoorah


Guess waaat?

I got my shoe back, anddd it seems to be in good condition though it laid there for days. :muddlehea

Last night I said to everyone 'I give up on that shoe' For Allahs sake. I honestly didnt want it anymore. Its not liek those shoes are the only shoes I have.

Peaceee
Thank God for your returned shoe! :)
Reply

in jihad
04-11-2011, 08:45 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Yanoorah
This woman is evil person. If we dont do something she will think she won.
What do it matter what she think? If it ain't Allah's will to guide the woman she stay that way. Tryin to do something about it is only gonna give ya headaches. Is it worth it?

As for the shoe you lost. If i be in yer shoes I be thinking about them Japanese people who lost their homes, their cars, their loved ones and even their lives in that tsunami. It wud make the pain of losing the shoe be mighty insignificant. :statisfie
Reply

in jihad
04-11-2011, 08:48 PM
:sl:

Wunderful! It's nice that u got yer shoe back! (Though not from that lady...:) )

alhamdulillah!!
Reply

YusufNoor
04-11-2011, 09:54 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Yanoorah


Guess waaat?

I got my shoe back, anddd it seems to be in good condition though it laid there for days. :muddlehea

Last night I said to everyone 'I give up on that shoe' For Allahs sake. I honestly didnt want it anymore. Its not liek those shoes are the only shoes I have.

This morning my sista saw their door open, the old man was there. She told him about the shoe and he seemed very shocked. Apparently his 'evil' daughter didnt inform him what shes been upto. He apologized, and gave my sista the shoe back. That old man is really an awesome human being mashaAllah, too bad that his daughter didnt inherit his kidndness....but oh well. Thats life.

Gosh, has my patience been tested or wat=)

Peaceee
:sl:

Alhumdulillah!

you see, as soon as you decided to be content with and for Allah, He fixed the problem for you. La Hawla wa La Quwata Illah Billah! the authority is [completely] for Allah , the Truth. He is best in reward and best in outcome!
Reply

Ansariyah
04-14-2011, 05:01 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by YusufNoor
:sl:

Alhumdulillah!

you see, as soon as you decided to be content with and for Allah, He fixed the problem for you. La Hawla wa La Quwata Illah Billah! the authority is [completely] for Allah , the Truth. He is best in reward and best in outcome!
Alhamdulilah,

Sometimes its the simple lil things in Life that teach us the biggest lessons.

Jzk to u & everyone=)
Reply

Cabdullahi
04-14-2011, 05:18 PM
See kind males do exist!
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