Keep thinking I've broke my wudu

[anonymous]

Assalaamu Alaykum to all,

Please can somebody help me in this problem I have, it's getting really bad for me now and making keeping wudu so difficult:

Basically from the second I start doing wudu my mind keeps focusing on it and I just can't stand still. I get so restless and I just can't make the thought go away. I'm trying so hard to not think about the fact that I'm in a state of wudu yet I just cannot get rid of it. And also, I so so so frequently get 'movements' and feelings as though wind has passed through. And i really don't know whether wind has passed through. It's getting so bad, I keep thinking that some wind will have always passed, even if I have not heard anything or smelled anything I feel sure that some wind has passed therefore my wudu has broken. And now I'm so tired of this that I'm just carrying on praying even if I say to myself it has broke because this is too much it really is . I just can't take it anymore I'm absolutely depressed I get so anxious at the thought of doing wudu and keeping it in between salaahs. I just cannot do it anymore, so I just keep my wudu. This is becoming too difficult for me and Allah knows my intentions so that is all I'm thinking about.

If i try to focus on worship I'm constantly getting bowel movements and these make me sure that I've passed wind, yet I carry on praying. I just cannot focus properly on anything, I've lost so much confidence, self esteem and happiness in myself. I used to be able to not think about it and hold my wudu for many hours, and now I cannot even go 15 minutes. I feel I have missed at least three Jummah's in a row because of this, even though I was present for the prayer. Now Allah has placed a seal on my heart, and I shall keep on worshipping Allah but this is becoming very difficult for me.

What am I supposed to do, I think I have so much patience and now I'm at my wit's end, Please can somebody help please :((((

Wasalaam

[Innocent Soul]

These ahadith will answer your question.

Narrated 'Abbas bin Tamim: My uncle asked Allah's Apostle about a person who imagined to have passed wind during the prayer. Allah' Apostle replied: "He should not leave his prayers unless he hears sound or smells something." (Sahih Bukhari: Book #4, Hadith #139)

'Abbad b. Tamim reported from his uncle that a person made a complaint to the Apostle (may peace be upon him) that he entertained (doubt) as it something had happened to him breaking his ablution. He (the Holy Prophet) said: He should not return (from prayer) unless he hears a sound or perceives a smell (of passing wind). Abu Bakr and Zuhair b. Harb have pointed out in their narrations that it was 'Abdullah b. Zaid. (Sahih Muslim: Book #003, Hadith #0702)

Read this thread it's long but really beneficial.
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...my-salaah.html