Masturbating, when wife is gone?

[Jinko]

I know its haram to masturbate by hands even when you are married. But i need advice on:

What if i am away from my wife for 50 Days on for example a business trip, or i am a soldier and are in a different country? Am i then allowed to do it? imsad

[Hamza Asadullah]

I know its haram to masturbate by hands even when you are married. But i need advice on:

What if i am away from my wife for 50 Days on for example a business trip, or i am a soldier and are in a different country? Am i then allowed to do it? imsad

Asalaamu Alaikum, According to Sheikh Mufti Ebrahim Desai:

The wife may masturbate the husband, however, masturbating oneself is incorrect. (Shaami vol.2 pg.399; HM Saeed)

See this thread for tips on how to control the urge of masterbation:

How to overcome Masterbation

http://www.islamicboard.com/advice-s...terbation.html


And Allah knows best in all matters

[Yanal]

Asalam alaikum brother,

It is without a doubt a sin to do so.
Imam Shafi’i stated that masturbation is forbidden based on the following verses from the Qur’aan (interpretation of the meaning):
"And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts). Except from their wives or (the captives and slaves) that their right hands possess, - for them, they are free from blame. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors." 23.5-7 Here the verses are clear in forbidding all illegal sexual acts (including masturbation) except for the wives or that their right hand possess. And whoever seeks beyond that is the transgressor.


You should try to stay away from these thoights of temptations that its ok.I believe masturbation is closely linked to the life style one lives on daily. If you have a lot of free time that is not constructively and efficently used to maximize ibaadath(worship) to Allah, then often our minds drifts into vain thoughts and from there it eventually turns the thoughts into sexual fantasies which the Shaitaan leads one too. Masturbation is the result of a weakening of the soul, through indulgence in vanities. The way to overcome this habit is not so much by resisting the temptation. That will be next to impossible and the more you think about something,the more urge you may seem to get instead of the temptation decreasing. You will have to examine the way you spend your time in the day,try to maximise each second if you can with your worship to Allah,especially now that it's tje holy month of Ramadhan,which we are extremely blessed to have lived to experience Ramadhan once again.Try to keep in acts of worship,like it's your last day,something along those lines should motivate you to do better,insha'Allaah. You must set goals for yourself to achieve in a day,some tasks,that you wish to complete throughout the day; goals that dont have to be necessarily religious. For example it could be the number of hours you can sit studying, the distance you can jog continuously, the number of pages you can read of any book, the number of push-ups you can do, a new sport to pick up perhaps, a letter to someone that you've been postponing, starting a diary, making quality improvements in diet. It could also be religious - reading a couple of pages of the Quran everyday, praying extra nawafil, trying to catch jamaa in congregation and the list could go on.

As you keep making continous, efficent improvements in the quality time spent in your day, you will automatically get the strength to stay away from it. You will even reach a point where the thought of it does not occur to you,insha'Allaah.

You can't really stop it by a direct attack on it,slowly take it on.But as you do all the above, it would do you good to speak to yourself about the morality of the act. A pondering on the impact of this act on your mindset would help. 'Does it affect the way you look at women?' is a very important question to ask to yourself. The relevance of the habit to the purpose of life is another. Another question could be:is this going to help me in the hereafter? These questions could help eliminate the thoughts as you come to realize what's right and what's wrong.

Be assured of one thing, it won't go away until you improve the overall quality of your life. Even if it does go away, it'll pay your life a visit again if the quality of your life drops,youll have to keep battling the temptation if it does reappear in any time of your life.Brother,you are a married man,you don't need to condone yourself to partake in these types of actions,insha'Allaah try staying away from those thoughts.You may feel the urge to but you must resists,don't sit down and think about the thoughts that are reoccuring in your head,do something so that your mind drifts away from those types of thoughts.You must put an effort in attempting to eliminate these types of thoughts that do you no good. Jsut try your best insha'Allaah.

You need to remind yourself that what you are doing is not an essential part and will never be,of your life and when you return, you have to stick your nose in the ground and not budge. I do not agree that you cannot fight temptation head on. The temptation is there because your nafs knows that you are going to give in eventually,but you won't because you will fight. So long as your nafs thinks that you are going to be swayed, it is going to keep tempting you. The nafs is most frequently and strongly attached to sins of the stomach and sexual organs, and when such things becomes habits, the only way out is to break them. So take the nafs away from its routine slowly and steadly if you must but do take it away.insha'Allaah that might help you along with brother Hamzas thread to get over the urge,may Allah help you along the way,ameen.insha'Allaah if I think of a few more tips or so I will add them onto this post as Allah permits,insha'Allaah.

Allah knows the best in every regarding aspect.