format_quote Originally Posted by
Just_A_Girl13
Asalaamu alaikum,
The reason that I have not slept is because I am worried about a good friend of mine. I constantly have completely irrational thoughts, such as "what if he's been in an accident and died?" and I can't seem to avoid them. I have no way of contacting him, and I have also discovered that he may have left the country, which is deeply distressing to me because of the thought of him being harmed in any way while traveling.
Jazak Allahu Khair :)
Asalaamu Alaikum, jazakallahu khayr for sharing your issue with us. I assume you have known this person for a while now and as humans we are created to be attracted to the opposite gender so obviously if two people of the opposite gender have got to know each other for a while then there will be feelings involved. These feelings then eventually develop into a relationship. After that the couple will create dreams together in their own little bubble. Just the both of them versus the world.
But their dream soon becomes reality when things go wrong and what happens then is that anguish and pain creeps in. This is happening all around us. So many people get hurt from failed relationships. This is because there is no peace and blessings in any relations outside of mariage. Also according to hadith shaythan is the third person in any interactions of two unmarried people when they are alone together. It is also said that it is better for a man to have an axe through his head than for him to touch the hand of a women his is not married to. So it is a major sin to be alone with or get to know the opposite gender without any mahrams present. This is to safeguard us against getting hurt and being used and abused as well as from the evil of shaythan who is present during such interactions.
That is why Islam encourages marriage. If you like someone who is Muslim then do not delay in marrying them. This proves if the person is genuine or not. If someone says "They are not ready yet", then they are making it clear marriage was never on their mind in the first place. So Islam encourages us to go about marriage in the right way and this ensures that so no one gets hurt.
Rememeber a relationship is not a guarantee for marriage. Many people use relationships to use and abuse the other person to get what they want and then they move on and do the same somewhere else. It can leave the person involved terribley hurt and even scarred.
Islam prevents this from happening and emphasises that true love only occurs after marriage. So many people can attest to this. What may feel like love before marriage is nothing of the sort. Once you are married to the right person in the right way then Allah will put true love into your heart and you will then realise whatever you feel now is not love at all.
Also sister you should not worry as he will be with family and if he has moved away then that is where his life is destined to be for him. So my sister in future prevent yourself from ever getting close to anyone from opposite gender. Only ever reserve your feelings and love for your husband after marriage. For the meanwhile concentrate on your studies and making the best of your Ramadan and every aspect of your life to ensure you do everything to please Allah and refrain from anything which angers or displeases him..
So when you are ready for marriage then go about it in the right way and you will find much peace and blessings from Allah. Who will find our partners? ONLY Allah finds anyone their partners for life. So surely if we go about marriage in the right manner then Allah will bless us with the best of partners who will help us in our journey to the hereafter. On top of that we would never get hurt or used and abused by a deciever.
So my sister there is nothing to worry about regarding this boy. Surely he is safe with his family. So concentrate on making the best of each second of this precious month. This is our best opportunity to get closer to Allah and to strengthen our imaan (faith) so that we are well equiped throughout the year.
Therefore we should spend each precious second in worship asking and begging of Allah for forgiveness and his mercy. Striving to get closer to him through worship and prayer. Our hearts are softened in this precious month so what better chance for us to purify our hearts further and soften it with his remembrance.
This is our chance to put the fear of Allah into our hearts and to live our lives ONLY to please Allah and invest in the hereafter which is our final destination. How long are we in this world? VERY short while. How long is the hereafter? FOREVER! Therefore we should spend as much of our little time as possible investing into the hereafter by doing everything possible to please Allah and refraining from anything which angers or displeases him.
B]The following are all threads that will help us to maximise each precious second of Ramadan:[/B]
1. 12 Ways to Maximize Everyday in Ramadan
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...y-ramadan.html
2. The Inner Dimensions of Fasting - A MUST READ!
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...must-read.html
3. 10 Steps to Increasing our Iman(Faith) this Ramadhan
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...-ramadhan.html
4. 10 steps to getting closer to Allah this Ramadan
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...h-ramadan.html
5. VERY Rewarding Nafl Salaahs we can Pray Everyday this Ramadan!
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...y-ramadan.html
6. 9 things a Women on Menses can do in Ramadan
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...o-ramadan.html
7. How productive was your day today in Ramadan?
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...y-ramadan.html
8. Immense Rewards for Reciting the Qur'an in Ramadan
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...n-ramadan.html
9. 15 Easy Good deeds to do throughout Ramadan!
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...t-ramadan.html
10. 40 Quick, Easy & Rewarding Good Deeds to do Everyday in Ramadhan!
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...-ramadhan.html
11. Ramadan is not just for one month it is for everyday of our lives!
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...our-lives.html
12. Do we have "Double intentions" this Ramadan?
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...s-ramadan.html
13. 10 Steps to Maximising the Last Ten Days of Ramadan
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...s-ramadan.html
14. 5 things to do on Laylatul Qadr
http://www.islamicboard.com/fasting-...atul-qadr.html
15. 6 Things to do on the Virtuous Night of Eid - Laylatul Jaazah (The Night of Rewards)
http://www.islamicboard.com/general/...t-rewards.html
If you need anymore help with anything at all then please do not hesitate to ask. Please mention me in your dua's.
May Allah enable us to make the best of the most beautiful and blessed month of Ramadan. Ameen