Peace, Mercy and Blessings be with you Anonymous
It is the Righteous Believers Who are Tested With Calamities
Though calamities may hit a believer as a surprise, the reality is that by virtue of being a believer one is supposed to suffer. If a believer understands the Islamic philosophy that this life is a testing ground, then he should realize that this philosophy will be implemented for him in practice while he lives in this testing ground, and not after he dies. Tests are not just limited to see whether one performs the rituals or not. His belief and commitments to Allah (swt), and his focus in the Hereafter will be fully and thoroughly tested with calamities and afflictions to gauge the depth of his faith in his heart. Achieving Paradise will not be easy. It will come only with unshakable faith and trust in Allah (swt). Allah, may He be glorified, says:
Ye shall certainly be tried and tested in your possessions and in your personal selves. (3:186) Do men think that they will be left alone on saying We believe and that they will not be tested? (29:2) Be sure We shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil); but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere. (2:155)
Ah! To how many believers these verses come out as relief and solace! How many hearts of believers, with wild storms and waves in there, have calm down when remembering these verses! Day in and day out, these verses have brought the believers to tranquility and provided them with strength. Their souls then speak out: Yea, we are tested because we are righteous believers. To have that feeling of being a righteous believer is very comforting indeed. Do our eyes not always witness the fact that it is the righteous people who always suffer with pain, loss, and calamities one after another while the unrighteous always seem to prosper? Trials are a Sign of Love By Allah
One individual once told another one who was going through tribulations that Allah (swt) was displeased with him, and hence his difficulties. This man lacked wisdom, for his comment was offensive to the person who was already distressed. More importantly, his understanding was incorrect from an Islamic perspective. The one who received the comment was a gentleman and also knowledgeable in Islam. Thus, it was not surprising that he decided to digest his remark and refrained from giving a response. There are people who do maintain that incorrect understanding. Whenever they see a believer who is suffering from some calamity or disease, they think that this is a reflection of Allah (swt) s wrath on him. They should remember about the Companions of the Prophet (p) who were severely persecuted or even killed after becoming Muslim, an event that wipes out all past sins. Even the prophets of Allah, the best of all people who ever walked on the face of the earth, were persecuted by their community without exception. Was Joseph not thrown into a well, sold as a slave, and then thrown back into a prison? Did Job not face severest of trials one after another, and was eventually left out by all except his wife? In fact, the Qur an tells us that many prophets were brutally killed by the unbelievers. These examples should establish the fact that trials and tribulations are not a sign of Allah s displeasure on someone. Quite the contrary, it is rather a sign of Allah s love on someone. The Prophet (p) said:
When Allah who is Great and Glorious loves people He afflicts them [with trials]. (Tirmidhi) Anyone for whom Allah intends good, He makes him suffer from some affliction. (Bukhari) When Allah intends good for His slave, He punishes him in this world, but when He intends an evil for His slave, He does not hasten to take him to task but calls him to account on the Day of Resurrection. (Tirmidhi)
The punishment in the Hereafter is much severe in fact unimaginable from our worldly perspective than any affliction one can face in this world. Therefore, when Allah (swt) loves someone and intends for him or her to go to Paradise, He wipes out his sins and mistakes and rewards him highly by putting him to afflictions in this world.
Allah Never Gives a Trial That is Too Great to Bear
Human beings are created weak (4:28). When a sudden calamity or distress befalls us, we easily become overwhelmed and often cry out, O Allah! This is too much for me to bear! It never is. The believers should know it for fact that Allah (swt) never puts any burden on a soul that is beyond its ability to bear. Perhaps because we often lose sight of this fact that Allah (swt) mentions this in several places in the Qur an:
On no soul doth Allah place a burden greater than it can bear. (2:286) On no soul do We place a burden greater than it can bear: before Us is a record which clearly shows the truth: they will never be wronged. (23:62) No burden do We place on any soul but that which it can bear. (6:152) And those who believe and do good We do not impose upon any of them a burden beyond his capacity. (7:42)
This fundamental truth is actually obvious to a believer who reflects. For, if the point is to test one s level of faith and commitment to Allah (swt), then it would be an injustice to put a burden on a soul that it will surely fail, and Allah (swt) never commits injustice against anyone:
nor is thy Lord ever unjust (in the least) to His servants. (41:46) Verily Allah will not deal unjustly with man in aught: it is man that wrongs his own soul. (10:44)
Therefore, no matter how difficult one s situation is or how sever his sufferings, he should have absolutely no doubt in his mind he has the ability to deal with the trial. Allah (swt) is Just, and every affliction that He tests his faithful servant with, there is always two viable outcome for him: passing the test with success and thus earning Allah s good pleasure, or failing it. The Stronger the Faith, the Harder the Test, and the Greater the Reward
A believer afflicted with a severe calamity should take comfort from the fact that those who have strong faith are given the harder trials. This is established by the Prophet (p). When asked about who suffers the greatest afflictions, he replied:
The prophets, then those who come next to them, then those who come next to them.
A man is afflicted in keeping his religion. If he is firm in his religion his trial is severe, but if there is weakness in his religion it is made light for him, and it continues like that till he walks on the earth having no sin. (Tirmidhi)
Why is it, one may ask, that people who are faithful and righteous should have to suffer? To get an answer, we should ask ourselves: is there any achievement without an effort or any fruit without labor? The obvious pattern that we see in our human experience is that those who work hard and go through the process of struggle are rewarded with success in this materialistic world. The greatest reward of everything that one can imagine is Paradise. In fact, the bliss and happiness in Paradise is so great that one cannot even imagine it (32:17). How can then one expect that he will achieve this greatest success without him being thoroughly tested to see if he qualifies for it? One should not think that following the rituals, such as making salat five times a day, is enough test for him. The external rituals that we do and the laws of the shari a that we observe returns immediate benefit to us as they bring peace and happiness to our families and provide us with a healthy social and moral society in which to live and prosper. Thus, one should not expect that observing Allah s commandments and reaping these benefits in turn is the only tests. The real test is the test of the heart where faith lives, and that is tested with affliction and hardship to check if the faith and trust in Allah is firm and well-rooted or is it weak and superficial:
Do men think that they will be left alone on saying We believe and that they will not be tested? We did test those before them and Allah will certainly know those who are true from those who are false. (29:2-3)
Each believer, therefore, must expect to be tested. The stronger his faith, the harder will be the test, and the greater his reward will be if he remains patient having unshakable faith and trust in Allah (swt). The Prophet (p) said:
The magnitude of the reward goes along with the magnitude of the affliction. (Tirmidhi)
And the believers will continue to go through trials and tribulations in their life until their sins are wiped and they die and meet Allah (swt) free from all sins:
The believing man or woman continues to have affliction in person, property and children so that they may finally meet Allah, free from sin. (Tirmidhi)
That is so because Allah (swt), in His Mercy and Generosity, not only rewards one when he is patient through his trials, but also sheds his sins for the pains and sufferings that he or she goes through. No matter how small the trial or how insignificant the discomfort, Allah (swt) will reward him for that and eliminate some sins. Said the Prophet (p):
No calamity befalls a Muslim but that Allah expiates some of his sins because of it, even though it were the prick he receives from a thorn. (Bukhari)
The question one should ask himself is: What is my reflex when I do get a prick of a thorn, or stumble on the street and hurt my toe, or my computer suddenly crashes making me loose some work? Does some uncomely word slips through the mouth to release anger and frustration, or do I stay in control and remain calm, patient, and thankful to Allah? [5]
Source:
http://www.welcome-back.org/topic/trials.shtml
Masha' Allah my brother/sister you have been blessed by Allah and you may be one of His special servants, for God does not afflict or test those whom He does not love; Remember Hardships come in our way to teach us the ultimate goal or purpose in this life, they purify us from inside and make us think deeper about the truth of this universe.For when we want to extract a metal we have to put it in fire first to remove all the dirt and excess from it so that it may become pure and shiny, the higher the heat the better the result.The Prophet peace and blessings be upon him said :
No Muslim is afflicted with harm because of sickness or some other inconvenience, but that Allah will remove his sins for him as a tree sheds its leaves. (Bukhari).
This is an inspiring story my dear I thought it would be good to share;Aminah Assilmi, a convert to Islam, mentioned about a person who died of cancer. He was only 20 years old, and yet she was dazzled by this young man s faith and love of Allah in the midst of suffering. She wrote:
Shortly before he died, he told me that Allah was truly Merciful. This man was in unbelievable anguish and was radiating with Allah's love. He said:Allah intends that I should enter heaven with a clean book.His death experience gave me something to think about. He taught me of Allah's love and mercy.
1.
Be Patient at the First Stroke
The mettle of a person is proven when he remains calm and in control even at a sudden and unforeseen calamity or difficulty. The Prophet (p) said:
Patience is only at the first (stroke) of grief. (Bukhari and Muslim) .
2.
When Calamity Befalls, Remember That It Is a Test.
Any affliction that a believer suffers is a test from Allah (swt). If he does not recognize the test, then he may feel despair and thus fail the test. The believer should particularly keep in mind the following verses from the Qur'an that remind that every single believer will be tested:
We shall try you until We test those among you who strive their utmost and persevere in patience; and we shall try your reported (mettle). (47:31)
Ye shall certainly be tried and tested in your possessions and in your personal selves. (3:186) Do men think that they will be left alone on saying We believe and that they will not be tested? (29:2)
-
How wonderful is the case of a believer! There is good for him in everything, and this is not the case with anyone except a believer. If prosperity attends him, he expresses gratitude to Allah and that is good for him; and if adversity befalls him, he endures it patiently and that is better for him. (Muslim)
Be Patient my dear, God willing you will find success because no Happiness stays forever and no misery is Eternal.
God almighty says:
Verily with every Hardship there is ease, with every hardship there is ease.
God almighty says:
155. Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere,
156. Who say, when afflicted with calamity: "To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return":-
157. They are those on whom (Descend) blessings from Allah, and Mercy, and they are the ones that receive guidance.
Do you not want to be of those whom the Blessings and Mercy of Allah showers upon,Verily Patience has a great reward in this World and the here after:
109. "A part of My servants there was, who used to pray 'our Lord! we believe; then do Thou forgive us, and have mercy upon us: For Thou art the Best of those who show mercy!"
110. "But ye treated them with ridicule, so much so that (ridicule of) them made you forget My Message while ye were laughing at them!
111. "I have rewarded them this Day f
or their patience and constancy: they are indeed the ones that have achieved Bliss..." - The Beleivers- Yusuf Ali.
12. And
because they were patient and constant, He will reward them with a Garden and (garments of) silk.( The Time-Man) Yusuf Ali.
7. But, for thy Lord's (Cause),
be patient and constant! (Mudather- The cloaked one- Yusuf Ali)
God Willing you are in for a great purpose my dear; The following verses confirm so:
34. Nor can goodness and Evil be equal. Repel (Evil) with what is better: Then will he between whom and thee was hatred become as it were thy friend and intimate!
35.
And no one will be granted such goodness except those who exercise patience and self-restraint,- none but persons of the greatest good fortune. ( Fussailat-Yusuf Ali.)
Rejoice, For you will have the best of reward:
10. Say: "O ye my servants who believe! Fear your Lord, good is (the reward) for those who do good in this world. Spacious is Allah.s earth!
those who patiently persevere will truly receive a reward without measure! (Yusuf Ali-The Troops)
format_quote Originally Posted by
anonymous
I have a serious illness and am severly handicapped. I get a lot of abuse from my relatives who take care of me, they sometimes deprive me of food, of clean clothing, hide my medications so i can't access them, treat me very cruelly and abuse me. They call me a parasite, wish I am dead, wish I would get out and die on the road, etc. i have been hit and threatened with murder/violence but if I pretend to be sleeping all day and hide under the bedcovers (I am basically bedridden by illness and in bed all day) then the violence is less. They are nice to everyone else except to me.
Is there anyway you can move out of your relatives place? Or Maybe live with another good family company whom fears Allah and Has mercy in their heart?If there's a respected elder family member that you can tell about what you are going through, then that would be a good step. I do not advise you to keep living with them for it is obvious that their conscience has slept a long time ago but if you can move then this would be best for you. God does not give a soul more than it can bear; If this is getting to a dangerous level then God will ask you about yourself you must not let them take advantage of your health, nor should you be weak infront of them. Tell them to stop abusing you and if it got to the point where they are actually threatening you of murder then you live with criminals and it is not suitable for you to live with them.If there's an active social community in your local Masjid then you must contact them and report the abuse, these people are clearly wronging themselves and committing a great injustice towards you and their own selves by these acts. If they are nice to everyone but not you then this is a great evidence of them wanting to indulge in such evil, How can they be nice to everyone( Who is well in health) and not to you ( who is tested with a disability), I would urge you my dear to try as much as you can to find a way and leave these people,But you said they are your relatives so, what about your nuclear family; Your Parents and siblings? Do you live in a different country? I am here for you, God willing I will do the best that is within my limited capability to help you because that is what we Muslim should do to each other we must help and comfort each other at times of hardship and suffering.
format_quote Originally Posted by
anonymous
anyway its put me in a severe depression and I really don't know how to cope with the abuse and with life. I do pray and read Quran, but the abuse has gotten worse in Ramadan, I really feel maybe God hates me and my duas are blocked somehow. I know its bad but I don't even feel like its Ramadan, Im not feeling the blessings and benefits. Its really hard to keep up with prayers and Quran etc when being abused. I have no physical strength due to my illness and the abuse drained all my emotional strength. I have no strength to do anything or even survive anymore. I dont know what to do or how to cope.
My dear God does
not hate you!
But He certainly Loves you and Cares of you.
And the suffering comes upon us to see if, through all this, we can still be good people. Will we, in the midst of this Hell on earth, rise above it, and do good deeds, or will we turn to evil? This means, will we still trust in God when these things happen? If we are poor, will we steal? Or will we be as kind and generous as if we were rich? If suffering comes, will we add to the suffering? Or will we fight to reduce it, and help the oppressed? Will we despair, like the atheist, and run off to the monastery, or will we take up arms to change the World? We inherit God's World. But have we the will to change it? That is why suffering exists. Islam says: Your belief will be tested. So we should welcome a test. When Islam is attacked, we should not hide. We should realize that this is our chance to show our belief. God did not make a World that did not need changing.
Secondly, Islam believes that the more we have to resist suffering in this World, the more will be our reward after death. Suffering is to be welcomed, for if we fight against it we earn forgiveness for our sins, and the chance to avoid Hell and seek Paradise.
The Hadiths says that Allah brings suffering to those whom he wishes to bless. The man Allah wishes to benefit, meets with suffering to get that benefit. Those who never know suffering will meet with terrible suffering on the day of Judgement. Now this is a warning for those of us who have easy, comfortable lives. We must try to do something for those who do suffer in life. We must all the more try to change the World because we personally live well in that World. Good fortune is a terrible curse, if it makes you sit back, and do nothing for the poor and helpless. How cursed are the privileged rich, who spend all their life in pleasures, and never try to change the World.
Convert difficulties into opportunities, for difficulties are divine surgeries to make you better. ~Author Unknown
Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience. ~Author Unknown
T
he beauty of the world has two edges, one of laughter, one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder. ~Virginia Woolf, A Room of One's Own, 1929
Suffering is above, not below. And everyone thinks that suffering is below. And everyone wants to rise. ~Antonio Porchia
I
f you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change. ~John A. Simone, Sr.
Sometimes in tragedy we find our life's purpose - the eye sheds a tear to find its focus. ~Robert Brault
We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. ~Kenji Miyazawa
“We were promised sufferings. They were part of the program. We were even told, '
'Blessed are they that mourn.''”
“
Suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope "
Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile,
but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy
If there is a remedy when trouble strikes,
What reason is there for despondency?
And if there is no help for it,
What is the use of being sad?
So come what may, I'll never harm
My cheery happiness of mind.
Depression never brings me what I want;
My virtue will be warped and marred by it.
About you relatives who do this to you this is a very good reminder to them of the veil they are committing against you and themselves by abusing you for:“Allah will say on the Day of Judgment,
‘O son of Adam, I was sick and you did not visit Me.' He will say, ‘O my Lord, how could I visit You, when you are the Lord of the Worlds.' Allah will say, ‘Did you not know that My servant so-and-so was sick and you did not visit him? Did you not know that if you had visited him, you would have found Me there?' Allah will say, ‘O son of Adam, I asked you for food and you fed Me not.' He shall say, ‘O my Lord, how could I feed you and you are the Lord of the Worlds?' And Allah will say, ‘Did you not know that My servant so-and-so was in need of food and you did not feed him? Did you not know that if you had fed him, you would have found that to have been for Me?' ‘O son of Adam, I asked you for water and you did not give Me to drink.' The man shall say, ‘O my Lord, how could I give You water, when You are the Lord of the Worlds?' Allah will say, ‘My servant so-and-so asked you for water and you did not give him to drink water. Did you not know that if you had given him to drink, you would have found that to have been for Me.' (Muslim, Hadith no. 4661) If we didn't ask about the sick and God will account is for that how about when the sick lives with us and yet we fail to treat them in merest way of humanity? Verily the wrath of God and His anger must befall on us."A Muslim is the one from whose tongue and hands the people are safe"- This clearly condems abuse and Violence.
The Prophet Muhammad (s) said: ““
Allah will not be merciful to those who are not merciful to people.”
——— Sahih al-Bukhari, Vol. 9, #473.
“
Be patient (in adversity); for, verily, God will not let the reward of the righteous be wasted.“
——— The Holy Quran, Chapter 11, Verse 115.
“[W]hoever abstains from asking others, Allah will make him contented, and whoever tries to make himself self-sufficient, Allah will make him self-sufficient.
And whoever remains patient, Allah will make him patient. Nobody can be given a blessing better and greater than patience.“
——— Prophet Muhammad (s) as reported by Abu Said Al Khudri
in Sahih Bukhari, vol 2 hadith 548.
“
Verily, the patience is at the first stroke of a calamity.“
——— Prophet Muhammad (s) as reported by Anas bin Malik in Sahih Bukhari, vol 2 hadith 372.
“If, in spite of intense supplication, there is a delay in the timing of the Gift [al-'ata], let that not be the cause for your despairing. For He has guaranteed you a response in what He chooses for you, not in what you choose for yourself, and at the time He desires, not the time you desire.“
——— The Hikam, Ibn ‘Ata’illah, Chapter 1, 6.
“We either make ourselves miserable or
we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.“
——— Carlos Castaneda.
If you need anymore help I'm here for you, I hope this helped a little I know that words are easier than actions and that many things are easier said than done, but I deeply wish you gain the best, and please update us with anything new.I'm often wrong and fail to help, but I also wish that other members on this board take this great opportunity and help themselves by helping such a strong and wonderful person as you are,keep you're head up high and Ramadan Mubarak :)God willing I shall certainly pray for you, and hope others would do as well.
Your sister May.