Marriage

[anonymous]

salam

Well it's a bit complicated, here is the situation.

There is an Arab man who never really feel attracted to Arab women, I mean not dreaming to have an Arab wife since beginning. He likes Asian looks since younger

Some of his qualities are as follows: he fears Allah, educated, kind, simple, responsible, with huge patience, hard working, very good to his own family esp to his mother

Now he failed from his 1st wife (Asian) with son, she was kind but very controlling, so one day, he lost his patience move and packed his things. She begged her to come back since then till today, she is still inlove with him. Many years ago her family forced her to run away to her home country with the boy in fear of husband having custody of son, although he didnt had plan because his mother told him that its better to be away from father but son child be away from mother. Since then he never fail to send monthly support.

2years after, his family is forcing him to marry an Arab woman, he refuses many times and in the end they dig in his head and they made him marry her.

The marriage is 4years now but as I said, he doesnt like the Arab woman, so basically there is nothing between them, communication or even a kiss.
Both of them knew this but perhaps because of ego, the woman stay with him (same house as his parents)

Now he married the 3rd wife, of course asian it is, and they are really happy, the family knows about it and they cant even talk to him because they knew they were mistaken to force him in the first place.

He also offered the arab woman to leave etc and he was so honest to tell her that he cant offer her anything, but she dont wanna go

is he facing any major sin?

pls analyze

[Alpha Dude]

:sl:

It is better to ask a shaykh this question.

[Ramadhan]

:sl:

yes, as brother Aplha said, please ask a shaykh.
However, I couldn't help but reminded of the marriage of zaid bin harithah (ra) and Zaynab bint. jahsh. Their marriage became "empty" marriage because they just had nothing that attracted both to each other and there was no communication with each other, and finally they were divorced after asking prophet Muhammad SAW if it's allowed.
But please don't take this as an advice from me, and again I emphasise: ask a syaikh.

[Predator]

Well , i know according to hadith in the below link that forced marriages are prohibited for women , i am yet to see such a similar hadith for man.Does a man have no choice ?

http://muslim-responses.com/Forced_Marriages/Forced_Marriages_

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[Insaanah]

:sl:

Well , i know according to hadith in the below link that forced marriages are prohibited for women , i am yet to see such a similar hadith for man.Does a man have no choice ?

Absolutely a man does, but a woman needs a wali for a marriage and some walis may force the girls under their care into marriages they didn't want/weren't pleased with. This is why the ahadith concern women, as they are far more likely to be forced into a marriage than a man.

forced marriages are prohibited for women.

A forced marriage is prohibited for both parties. One of the conditions for the soundness of the marriage contract is that the groom, the wali, and the bride, must accept and be pleased with the marriage itself. This condition must be fulfilled for the marriage to have it's proper legal effect. If this condition is not met, then the marriage is baatil, i.e. void. According to Hanafi fiqh though, it is not a condition for it's soundness.

Allah has said in the Qur'an:

يَـأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ لاَ تَأْكُلُواْ أَمْوَلَكُمْ بَيْنَكُمْ بِالْبَـطِلِ إِلاَّ أَن تَكُونَ تِجَـرَةً عَن تَرَاضٍ مِّنْكُمْ

"O you who believe! Eat not up your property among yourselves unjustly except it be a trade amongst you, by mutual consent..." (4:29, Part)

If Allah has obligated mutual consent for any kind of business transaction, it should go without saying that such mutual consent is a must for marriage.

Source: The Fiqh of Family, Marriage and Divorce, by Jamal Zarabozo, American Open University, 1997

The person mentioned in the OP would need to discuss the details of his particular case with a scholar.

Allah knows best in all matters.

:sl:

[Asiyah3]

As bro Alpha said, please ask a shaikh.