is it haraam?

[Marina-Aisha]

recently i have reading alot about islam because i want to know more about my partners faith but ive been thinking bout converting but im not sure because i know im family would disown me if that happened. I know cover your hair is very important for a women but if i dont wear it around my family would that be haraam?is there any point in converting?would Allah disapprove if im keeping it from my family?would he disapprove because im doing something that dont want?i recently family had a argument with my sister telling her bout covering zainab hair and we got in some huge argument i didnt speak her for two weeks.....if i wear hajaab all the time expect when they r around would b okay?or keeping a secret a haraam? help pleaseeeeeee

[esperanza]

dear siter..as far as i know ..if you make the decision to convert..there is no sin from keeping it from your family....if this is difficult for you to tell them...
as for hijab..if you make the decision to wear you should not wear sometimes or others no ..but be sure before you make the deccision as then you will feel secure...and if its your diret family oyu would not need...
also iwonder about your age...your fsmily still has responsibility over you ...
but the important thing if you became muslim..you must respect them and treat them the same unless thye try to turn you away from the religion
i know a ouyng girl recently converted going through deep problems wiht her family...it may not be easy ..but ihope you find the wya god willing

[wafiya]

Salaam.

Allah (subhaanahu wa ta'aalaa) describes the best of belivers as:

وَمَنْ أَحْسَنُ قَوْلاً مِّمَّن دَعَا إِلَى اللَّهِ وَعَمِلَ صَالِحاً وَقَالَ إِنَّنِي مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِينَ

And who is better in speech than he who invites (people) to Allâh's (Islâmic Monotheism), and does righteous deeds, and says: "I am one of the Muslims."
In this verse, the best of believers are described as those possessing those qualities one of which is announcing that you are a Muslim. This should the pride of the Muslim and not something to be ashamed or afraid of.

sister everyones situation is different when it comes a time for a revert to tell their family they have converted (we do not now how the family will react)...ask Allah for guidance and Insh'Allah I hope you will be granted with the strength to tell your famliy.

As for the hijab ... I am unsure what to say and unable to give you advice ... I hope you find someone with more knowledge than me on this subject.

:statisfie

[Abz2000]

sister, i don't have the knowledge to give you that advice,
but i can give you some sources to look at:
read the story of the wife of pharaoh Asia (may Allah (swt) be pleased with her) she hid her faith due to fear of his tyranny.

and the man in Pharaoh court who concealed his faith at first, but then came out in the open to warn them when he saw they were plotting to kill Moses (pbuh), Allah then saved him from every ill they plotted against him.

then there are also the stories of other people who have accepted Islam in secret, hiding it from their families, then they happened to die, the people who knew they were muslim had to literally fight with their families in order to give them a Muslim burial, sometimes the families prevailed.

alexander litvinenko
Two days before his death Litvinenko informed his father that he had converted to Islam. Litvinenko's conversion to Islam and the related wish for Muslim funeral rites were recognized by his father. Goldfarb stated, "Unfortunately some people appeared and against the explicit wishes of the widow performed Muslim rites over the funeral. We had a choice to turn it into an unseemly situation, but Marina asked us to respect the memory of Alexander and let these people do what they did. Let God be their judge." Ghayasuddin Siddiqui, head of the Muslim Parliament of Great Britain, contended that Litvineko actually converted to Sunni Islam 10 days before he was poisoned. Akhmed Zakayev Foreign Minister of Chechen government-in-exile who lived next door to Mr Litvinenko and considered him "like a brother," said: "He was read to from the Quran the day before he died and had told his wife and family that he wanted to be buried in accordance with Muslim tradition."

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[Marina-Aisha]

Salaam.

Allah (subhaanahu wa ta'aalaa) describes the best of belivers as:

وَمَنْ أَحْسَنُ قَوْلاً مِّمَّن دَعَا إِلَى اللَّهِ وَعَمِلَ صَالِحاً وَقَالَ إِنَّنِي مِنَ الْمُسْلِمِينَ

And who is better in speech than he who invites (people) to Allâh's (Islâmic Monotheism), and does righteous deeds, and says: "I am one of the Muslims."
In this verse, the best of believers are described as those possessing those qualities one of which is announcing that you are a Muslim. This should the pride of the Muslim and not something to be ashamed or afraid of.

sister everyones situation is different when it comes a time for a revert to tell their family they have converted (we do not now how the family will react)...ask Allah for guidance and Insh'Allah I hope you will be granted with the strength to tell your famliy.

As for the hijab ... I am unsure what to say and unable to give you advice ... I hope you find someone with more knowledge than me on this subject.

:statisfie

thats my point is there any point converting when im hiding it like its some dirty little secret? yes im drawn to islam but if i cant face my family is there a point to convert? you see im a greek cypriot and im family would disown me if i would convert to islam...maybe when i have courage ill convert then maybe

[Ramadhan]

You don't have to wear hijab around your immediate family members.

[Marina-Aisha]

yea i was on that website chat islam and you get to talk to someone with all ur question she was very helpful actually apparently i dont have to wear it unless im in front of cousin or in laws..which is good. i think im really going to do it, maybe years on i will have the courage to tell them.

[wafiya]

thats my point is there any point converting when im hiding it like its some dirty little secret? yes im drawn to islam but if i cant face my family is there a point to convert? you see im a greek cypriot and im family would disown me if i would convert to islam...maybe when i have courage ill convert then maybe

BUT you need to understand its not a 'dirty secret' as you say, you are comming back to Allah there is nothing wrong with that! please understand if you don't want to revert to Islam because you are afraid of what your family says then your faith isn't strong! Allah comes before our families. there's nothing to be ashamed of sister.

But like I have said please talk to someone with more knowledge (i hope someone on this forum has the right knowledge on this forum to advise you)

and Insh'Allah everything will be ok.

[Salahudeen]

recently i have reading alot about islam because i want to know more about my partners faith but ive been thinking bout converting but im not sure because i know im family would disown me if that happened. I know cover your hair is very important for a women but if i dont wear it around my family would that be haraam?is there any point in converting?would Allah disapprove if im keeping it from my family?would he disapprove because im doing something that dont want?i recently family had a argument with my sister telling her bout covering zainab hair and we got in some huge argument i didnt speak her for two weeks.....if i wear hajaab all the time expect when they r around would b okay?or keeping a secret a haraam? help pleaseeeeeee

If you believe Islam to be the truth from God then you should revert, it's understandable you're hesitant about wearing the hijaab as you never wore it your whole life and it will feel quite strange wearing it at first but you can take baby steps can't you, doesn't all have to happen over night, the most important thing is that you declare your faith and become a Muslim, if you don't wear hijaab it won't take you out of Islam but you will just be sinning since god commanded women to dress modestly and display their adornments only for their husbands, but you'll still be a Muslim at the end of the day and this is the most important thing, affirming your belief in the creator of the universe and all his prophets and messengers that he sent to mankind. Also you don't have to wear it around your immediate family members, you only have to wear it around men that you're permitted to marry. You're next question might be who am I permitted to marry :hmm: if it is I'll find the answer for you I can't remember off the top of my head. You also don't have to wear it around other women.

Even if you don't wear it, there is still point in converting as long as you believe in your creator, because the sin of disbelieving in your creator and his prophets is greater than not wearing hijaab, you can still be a Muslim and not wear hijaab, but you will be sinning.

I don't see why you would have to declare your faith to your family, you can wait until the time is right as others have done in the past, there's nothing that says you have to shout it out to the whole world and announce it on the 6 o clock news ;D

Islam is all about your relationship with your creator and your submission to his will, it doesn't matter if other people don't know.

[Marina-Aisha]

what im trying to say is i would have to tell them eventually, you cant hide if forever..ive read that some Prophets have hid it but they eventually told everyone..i know what your saying that i shouldnt do it if im not sure or afraid..i just feel is islam is right in my heart.

[Marina-Aisha]

thank you, i know what your saying..but im not saying im ashamed. ..i think i might just do it u have have to follow ur heart..anyway i have pleanty time theres no rush.

[- Malak -]

Follow you are heart. Allah will help you. I agree with you the time will come to say to your family. actually it is not comfortable to hide. what will you do at Salah time ?. they will know at the end. but you only know how your family will react. however Allah is more important than anyone or anything else.
Regarding Hejab, if you don't wear it , it is sin but you are still Muslim. when you decide to wear Hejab, so you will wear it all the time.
men that you will not wear Hijab around them are ( father, brother, your sister's sons , your brother's sons, father's brothers, mother's brothers, your sons, and of curse your husband, your husband father) and sure there is no Hejab arround women.

wish Allah helps you

[Marina-Aisha]

i dont live with my family so its not that big of a deal, they come round once a week to see me and i dont need to wear the hijab when they r round..i would have to tell the in time but i wanted to get use to everything first..they properly disown me but untill then im just going to enjoy becoming a muslim for now.