View Full Version : The Official Geeks' Thread.
'Abd Al-Maajid
11-23-2010, 04:41 PM
:sl:
This is the official geeks' thread, all geeky/nerdy jokes about math, physics, computers, internet etc goes here. Keep it as geeky as possible. ;D
Thank you
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-23-2010, 04:41 PM
There is no place like 127.0.0.1 ;D;D;D
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-24-2010, 06:14 AM
For some didn't understand the joke....^ LOL. 127.0.0.1 is loop back ip address for a machine. If you try to reach this address i.e. 127.0.0.1 via telnet you get redirected to the same machine from which you fired the command. So, its nothing but a nerdy humor, here it means 'home'. :D
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'Abd Al-Maajid
12-27-2010, 08:09 AM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
01-26-2011, 06:45 AM
Physics would have been much easier if teh tree itself had fallen on Newton's head instead of the apple. :giggling:
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'Abd Al-Maajid
05-07-2011, 10:48 AM
I just love the last strip. It's so nerdy and funny. :giggling:
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'Abd Al-Maajid
05-08-2011, 02:11 PM
:giggling::giggling::giggling::giggling::giggling: :giggling:
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'Abd Al-Maajid
05-26-2011, 05:56 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-15-2011, 04:33 AM
I could not resist... ;D;D;D;D
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marwen
06-17-2011, 10:05 AM
Programmers' automated thinking :
******************
A Programmer’s wife sends him to the store telling him: “Honey, pick up two loaves of bread. And if they have fresh eggs, get a dozen.”
An hour later he returns home with 12 loaves of bread.
- " What's wrong honey ? they had fresh eggs !"
******************
A programmer sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night and feels thirsty. Soon, he thinks of a solution. He will leave 2 glasses next to his bed. One full of water, in case he wakes up, and he is thirsty, and one empty glass, in case he wakes up, and he is not thirsty.
******************
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Woodrow
06-18-2011, 04:35 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
marwen
Programmers' automated thinking :
*****************
A programmer sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night and feels thirsty. Soon, he thinks of a solution. He will leave 2 glasses next to his bed. One full of water, in case he wakes up, and he is thirsty, and one empty glass, in case he wakes up, and he is not thirsty.
******************
I am thinking about his wife driving him crazy by when he is asleep, she adds a third glass that is half full.
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-18-2011, 04:42 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Woodrow
I am thinking about his wife driving him crazy by when he is asleep, she adds a third glass that is half full.
Program will end abruptly...just after intializing. :p
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'Abd Al-Maajid
07-20-2011, 06:38 AM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
09-21-2011, 01:45 AM
Marwen, here's one for you. :D
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marwen
09-29-2011, 03:23 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
09-30-2011, 09:59 AM
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marwen
10-05-2011, 11:28 AM
Did you hear about the snail that got beat up by two turtles?
At the police station they asked him, “Did you get a good look at the turtles that did this? He said, “No, it all happened so fast.”
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'Abd Al-Maajid
10-15-2011, 02:18 PM
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Pure Purple
10-21-2011, 02:47 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
10-21-2011, 07:34 PM
Another geeky joke, Marwen. Just for you! :D
Q: What did EXT4 say to NTFS?
A: Go fsck yourself!
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Pure Purple
10-22-2011, 04:09 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
10-31-2011, 06:17 PM
All that glitters has a high refractive index.
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'Abd Al-Maajid
10-31-2011, 06:50 PM
Some geeky joke for UNIX fans/users out there. Marwen. :)
Sysadmin (n): The untrained being underpaid for doing the impossible with the obsolete.
Windows95 is a 32-bit extension to a 16-bit shell of an 8-bit OS originally written for a 4-bit microprocessor by a 2-bit company that can't stand 1-bit of competition.
I've seen Sun monitors on fire off the side of the multimedia lab. I've seen NTU lights glitter in the dark near the Mail Gate. All these things will be lost in time, like the root partition last week. Time to die...
You know you're a Unix guy when your dreams start with #!/bin/sh.
I came, I saw, I deleted all your files.
grep...grep...grep...(frog with UNIX stuck in it's throat)
Surely the 4 sysadmins of the apocalypse should be: edquota, rm -rf, kill -9, and shutdown.
Q. What's the difference between Batman and Bill Gates?
A. When Batman fought the Penguin, he won.
Behind every great computer sits a skinny little geek.
:q :q! :wq :w :w! :wq! :quit :quit! :help help helpquit quit quithelp
:quitplease :quitnow :leave ^X ^C ^C ^D ^Z ^Q QUITDAMMIT ^]:wq ;D;D;D I used to do this to exit from vi lol
Sun bug report (#4102680): "Workaround: don't pound on the mouse like a wild monkey."
"SPARC" is "CRAPS" backwards
There are only 10 kinds of people in the world
Those who understand binary, and those who don't.
IRC is just multiplayer notepad.
Although the Buddhists will tell you that desire is the root of suffering,
my personal experience leads me to point the finger at system administration.
You can have my Unix system when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers. :statisfie
Every bit is sacred, Every bit is right.
If a bit is wasted, I can't sleep at night.
Every bit is gorgeous, Every bit is free.
Admire the shape it forges, In hex and BCD!
I'm gonna train my children to say sudo instead of please ;D
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marwen
10-31-2011, 08:03 PM
^ I love your geeky jokes man ;D
these ones are the best :
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
...
Sysadmin (n): The untrained being underpaid for doing the impossible with the obsolete.
...
You know you're a Unix guy when your dreams start with #!/bin/sh.
...
Surely the 4 sysadmins of the apocalypse should be: edquota, rm -rf, kill -9, and shutdown.
...
Behind every great computer sits a skinny little geek.
...
You can have my Unix system when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers.
...
I'm gonna train my children to say sudo instead of please
now my tummy hurts from laughing +o( ;D
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-02-2011, 09:46 AM
Q: What does the zero say to the the eight?
A: Nice belt!
"What is Pi?"
A mathematician: "Pi is the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter."
A computer programmer: "Pi is 3.141592653589 in double precision."
A physicist: "Pi is 3.14159 plus or minus 0.000005."
An engineer: "Pi is about 22/7."
A nutritionist: "Pie is a healthy and delicious dessert!" ;D
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Iconodule
11-02-2011, 06:50 PM
What about humanities geekery (history, philosophy, literature, etc.)?
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Who Am I?
11-02-2011, 07:12 PM
Yeah, I'm not a "geek" by that definition as I am a history nerd and not a math nerd.
I do know some things about science though.
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Ğħαrєєвαħ
11-02-2011, 07:14 PM
As'Salaam Alaaykum
I dont believe the word 'geeky' should be used here, physics, math, computers, internet are all nerdy subjects not 'fun' subjects.
except maybe for the 'internet'.. The thread should be titled 'Not so Geeky official thread'..or 'Official nerds only thread'.
That way people will know whether they should click the thread or not.
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-02-2011, 07:17 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Jεώel oғ ωïѕdoм
As'Salaam Alaaykum
I dont believe the word 'geeky' should be used here, physics, math, computers, internet are all nerdy subjects not 'fun' subjects.
except maybe for the 'internet'.. The thread should be titled 'Not so Geeky official thread'..or 'Official nerds only thread'.
That way people will know whether they should click the thread or not.
:lol: This thread is created so as to preserve the general jokes thread from certain 'mundane' nerdy jokes...:p
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Ğħαrєєвαħ
11-02-2011, 08:53 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
This thread is created so as to preserve the general jokes thread from certain 'mundane' nerdy jokes...
I could never understand the certain 'mundane' nerdy jokes posted on the thread. To mention also the word nerd suits this thread best.
However, you may Continue..
oh and just noticed this thread was created in some time in 2010, i thought it was created today.
peace
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Ramadhan
11-02-2011, 11:01 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
:lol: This thread is created so as to preserve the general jokes thread from certain 'mundane' nerdy jokes...:p
And you are the biggest culprit after all.. :/:
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Who Am I?
11-03-2011, 04:29 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Jεώel oғ ωïѕdoм
I could never understand the certain 'mundane' nerdy jokes posted on the thread. To mention also the word nerd suits this thread best.
However, you may Continue..
oh and just noticed this thread was created in some time in 2010, i thought it was created today.
peace
Well I'll be....
you're right.
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Abz2000
11-03-2011, 11:17 PM
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syed1
11-04-2011, 02:07 AM
Okay guys here is the most mind boggling question you will ever face:
there is a student at a shoe store and he really likes these pair of shoes, however, the price tag is $97.00 . The student is completely broke and so ask 2 of his friend to loan him 50 dollars each so as to have a total of $100.00 .
He now purchases the pair of shoes for $97.00 dollars and so has 3 dollars remaining all in loonies (1 dollar coins). So as to be fair to the 2 students who loaned him money, he decides to give them 1 dollar each and keep the third dollar to him self as he cannot split it.
So, now the lenders have got 1 dollar back so they are both owed 49 dollars for a total of 98 dollars, Plus the one dollar that the shoe purchaser still has so that equals a total of 99 dollars (49+49+1) ....
the question is : What happened to the other dollar? ie. there should be 100
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Abz2000
11-04-2011, 03:44 AM
the one dollar that the shoe purchaser still has should not be added to the debt, it should be subtracted from the 98 to attain the price of the shoes,
so he ultimately borrowed 98, spent 97 on the shoes, has 1 remaining.
break down:
after repayment of the 2 dollars change,
friend 1 gave 49,
friend 2 gave 49,
he had 98, spent 97, and still has 1.
had to puzzle over it like a dimwit for quite a while though!
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syed1
11-04-2011, 02:27 PM
^^haha yeah, this really makes a bold statement as to how our minds have become so dull with the increase of standardized education..
it really kills our creativity and our critical thinking...we make things more complex than they need to be..
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Ramadhan
11-04-2011, 03:31 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
syed1
^^haha yeah, this really makes a bold statement as to how our minds have become so dull with the increase of standardized education..
it really kills our creativity and our critical thinking...we make things more complex than they need to be..
if you like those kind of questions, go over here
http://www.islamicboard.com/puzzles-...-knows-73.html Reply
marwen
11-04-2011, 08:32 PM
A guy gets on a bus and starts threatening everybody: "I'll integrate you! I'll differentiate you!!!" So everybody gets scared and runs away. Only one person stays. The guy comes up to him and says: "Aren't you scared, I'll integrate you, I'll differentiate you!!!" And the other guy says; "No, I am not scared, I am e^x."
:skeleton:
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syed1
11-07-2011, 12:57 AM
^^ is it e^-1?
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Scimitar
11-07-2011, 04:09 AM
BWuahahahahaaaaaa.... love it.
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-07-2011, 06:29 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
marwen
in addition to that,
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Dagless
11-07-2011, 10:40 AM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-09-2011, 06:42 AM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-09-2011, 06:56 PM
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Muezzin
11-09-2011, 10:16 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
abz2000
Love the IT Crowd. In a weird way it reminds of Red Dwarf, another classic sitcom.
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Muezzin
11-09-2011, 10:17 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
abz2000
Love the IT Crowd. The writing is so sharp and on a par with that of Red Dwarf, another sitcom classic.
Anyhow, here's another funny scene from the IT Crowd.
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-12-2011, 10:12 AM
Not a joke but worth sharing in this thread.
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Abz2000
11-12-2011, 05:24 PM
some pretty effective instructions on how to stop a clicking hard disk:
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-14-2011, 08:57 AM
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Abz2000
11-14-2011, 04:55 PM
here's an interesting project - though my missus didn't think so as she was the first to test it.
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'Abd Al-Maajid
11-14-2011, 05:00 PM
^ LOL! that must be fun. It's been a loooong time since i worked on an electronic project. Will try it if i get some spare time.
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AabiruSabeel
11-15-2011, 06:25 PM
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syed1
11-16-2011, 12:27 AM
comon guys post more stuff here something like a riddle to get my mind thinking! (enough with the silly pics :statisfie)
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Ramadhan
11-16-2011, 01:44 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
syed1
comon guys post more stuff here something like a riddle to get my mind thinking! (enough with the silly pics :statisfie)
ermmm... juts to let you know, this thread IS for silly pics. :exhausted
If you want riddles, go to this thread:
http://www.islamicboard.com/puzzles-...-knows-74.html Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
11-29-2011, 06:06 PM
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~Raindrop~
11-29-2011, 10:04 PM
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Abdul-Raouf
12-01-2011, 05:39 PM
This thread is ...
........................:awesome:
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'Abd Al-Maajid
12-05-2011, 06:31 AM
Reasons why I choose to be in IT industry:
I hate sleeping.
I have enjoyed my life in childhood.
I cant life without tension.
I wanted to have disturbed family life.
I believe in the saying, 'neki kar, gade me daal'.
I wanted to take revenge on myself.
I love dreaming and see client's dream come true.
I wanted social boycott.
I wanted to break-up with my friends.
I love to work on holidays.
I can't live without cellphone.
I love begging for payment.
;D;D;D;D;D
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AabiruSabeel
12-13-2011, 04:12 PM
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Abz2000
12-14-2011, 06:32 AM
A plain computer illeterate guy rings tech support to report that
his computer is faulty.
Tech: What's the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: You'll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup
and it will fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the
command.
10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech
is frustrated and fed up.
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our customers this, but there
is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech: Just add the line LOAD <http://nosmoke.com/> NOSMOKE.COM at the
end of the CONFIG.SYS.
Letme know how it goes.
10 minutes later.
User: It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech: Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User: MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech: That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't come with
NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you
the file. Let me know how it goes.
1 hour later.
User: I need a new power supply.
Tech: How did you come to that conclusion?
User: Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said, and he
started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE.
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AabiruSabeel
12-16-2011, 08:54 PM
Newton probably didn't ask that. There's no chain of narration.
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Abz2000
12-16-2011, 11:03 PM
A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."
He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will tell everyone how smart and brave you are and how you are my hero"
The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will be your loving companion for an entire week."
The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.
The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for a year and do ANYTHING you want."
Again the man took the frog out, smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket.Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a year and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"
The man said, "Look, I'm a computer programmer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool."
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Muezzin
12-17-2011, 01:04 PM
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AabiruSabeel
12-17-2011, 09:19 PM
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Abz2000
12-18-2011, 02:53 AM
DNS User: My keyboard is not working anymore.
DNS Help Desk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
DNS User: No. I can't get behind the computer.
DNS Help Desk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back
DNS User:! OK
DNS Help Desk: Did the keyboard come with you?
DNS User: Yes
DNS Help Desk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
DNS User: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work....
----------------------------------------
DNS User: I can't get on the Internet.
DNS Help Desk: Are you sure you used the right password?
DNS User: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
DNS Help Desk: Can you tell me what the password was?
DNS User: Five stars. *****
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DNS User: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer,
but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
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marwen
12-18-2011, 06:44 AM
^ hilarious ;D;D;D
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AabiruSabeel
12-19-2011, 06:17 PM
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~Raindrop~
12-19-2011, 07:44 PM
^I actually got that error message in the office last week. Some joker had pulled the cable out :hmm:
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Abz2000
12-20-2011, 01:43 AM
^ so did you press F1 or DEL?
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marwen
12-20-2011, 03:54 PM
^ Actually that message means : find your keyboard, plug it, then press F1 to continue. But as you know, computers(scientists) have such stupid wording.
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marwen
12-23-2011, 08:23 PM
Protocols :
- A TCP packet walks into a bar and says, "I'd like a beer." The bartender replies, "You want a beer?" The TCP packet replies, "Yes, I'd like a beer."
- A UDP packet walks into a bar, the bartender says "Hello, what can I get you". The UDP packet doesnt acknowledge.
- A Broadcast packet walks into a bar, screams to the bartender, "HEY MAC! I WANT A BEER!" Everyone else in the bar hears him but chooses to ignore him.
- An ARP packet walks into a bar and introduces himself
- A RARP packet walks into the bar and knows your name, but needs to know your address.
- A Multicast Packet walks into a bar and says "A Beer for everyone!" and everyone gets the beer at the same time.
- An AppleTalk packet walks into a bar and orders a beer, but nobody understands.
- IPv4 walks into a bar The bartender asks, "what'll it be?" IPv4 responds, "a strong CIDR please... I'm exhausted."
- Bit Torrent packet go to bar and asks for beer. Everyone in the bar who have beer gives him a sip :D
*************************
A physicist, a biologist, and a programmer are sitting at a café across from an empty building. They observe two people enter and then, later, three leave.
The physicist says, "Apparently there was some error with our measurements." The biologist says, "Obviously, they reproduced while in the building."
The programmer replies " they must've used a backdoor".
*************************
So Helium walks into a bar and orders a beer, the bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here." Helium doesn't react.
*************************
x
2 and e
x are at a party. x
2 is having a blast, but e
x is sitting in a corner by himself. Eventually, x
2 comes over and says, "hey e
x, why don't you try a bit harder to integrate?" e
x replies, "It's no use. It wouldn't make a difference."
*************************
Why do computer programmers confuse Halloween and Christmas?
Because OCT 31 = DEC 25.
*************************
M.C. Escher walks into a bar. The bartender says, "hey, want to hear a joke? Okay, so M.C. Escher walks into a bar. The bartender says, "hey, want to hear a joke? Okay, so M.C. Escher walks into a bar. The bartender says, "hey, want to hear a joke? Okay, so...
*************************
How do you get a philosophy major off your door step?
Pay for the pizza.
*************************
How many narcissists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. He sticks the bulb in the socket and waits for the room to revolve around him.
*************************
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third orders 1/4 of a beer. The fifth orders 1/8 of a beer (...)
The bartender says, "You're all idiots," and pours two beers.
http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/co...llectual_joke/ Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
12-24-2011, 05:38 AM
^ Loved the jokes...:)
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Ramadhan
12-25-2011, 02:52 AM
LOOOOL!
Those are the funniest geeky jokes I've heard in a while!
;D
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AabiruSabeel
01-07-2012, 08:23 PM
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sis muslimah
01-07-2012, 11:10 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
marwen
so helium walks into a bar and orders a beer, the bartender says, "sorry, we don't serve noble gases here." helium doesn't react.
*************************
x2 and ex are at a party. X2 is having a blast, but ex is sitting in a corner by himself. Eventually, x2 comes over and says, "hey ex, why don't you try a bit harder to integrate?" ex replies, "it's no use. It wouldn't make a difference."
;d;d;d
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'Abd Al-Maajid
01-11-2012, 04:26 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
01-12-2012, 06:07 PM
Remember these partial differential equations?:phew
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'Abd Al-Maajid
01-14-2012, 04:55 AM
Still he has a nice tie. :p
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'Abd Al-Maajid
02-09-2012, 11:27 AM
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Who Am I?
02-09-2012, 07:33 PM
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tw009
02-09-2012, 09:26 PM
^lollll!
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cOsMiCiNtUiTiOn
02-09-2012, 10:07 PM
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.;D
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Who Am I?
02-10-2012, 01:21 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
CosmicIntuition
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.;D
Oh, sister.. .that's... terrible. I have a friend of mine who would like that. He loves cheesy punny humor like that.
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cOsMiCiNtUiTiOn
02-11-2012, 06:16 PM
Oh soooooo doooooo IIIIII ;D cheesy humor is by far the best IMO.
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Neon Teen
02-16-2012, 02:37 PM
its an old 1
Maths
M: Mental
A: Attack
T: To
H: Handsome
S: Students
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Who Am I?
02-16-2012, 03:33 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
cOsMiCiNtUiTiOn
Oh soooooo doooooo IIIIII ;D cheesy humor is by far the best IMO.
Ah, see, my sense of humor is not so much cheesy as it is warped.
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Abz2000
02-16-2012, 05:29 PM
a boy gets on the bus and refuses to pay the fare, the conductor gets into an altercation with him and pushes him down the stairs and the boy dies,
they find the conductor guilty of murder and they decide to electrocute him, so they shave up his body and apply 500,000v, no result, they up it to 700,000v, no result, the conductor looks around at them all nonchalantly, so they up it to 1000,000v still no result. so they send him to the research center and have tests done on him and on the equipment, the scientists complete all the tests and come out with the results:
he's a really bad conductor.
dumb joke i know, but our physics teacher told us it back in school days and we couldn't help laughing.
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Muezzin
02-17-2012, 11:27 PM
Our physics teacher never told us any jokes. He just gave the whole class an electric shock.
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'Abd Al-Maajid
02-22-2012, 08:07 AM
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Who Am I?
02-22-2012, 06:48 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Muezzin
Our physics teacher never told us any jokes. He just gave the whole class an electric shock.
Boo!!! Terrible!!
*throws canned fruit*
(my friend who likes cheesy puns might like it)
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Muezzin
02-22-2012, 08:48 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Who Am I?
Boo!!! Terrible!!
*throws canned fruit*
(my friend who likes cheesy puns might like it)
For clarification, I wasn't joking. He actually did give the entire class an electric shock.
Come to think of it, that's kind of awesome.
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Who Am I?
02-23-2012, 02:17 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Muezzin
For clarification, I wasn't joking. He actually did give the entire class an electric shock.
Come to think of it, that's kind of awesome.
OK, that's a bit better.
*Darth Vader voice* Impressive.... most impressive...
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'Abd Al-Maajid
03-06-2012, 03:00 AM
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AabiruSabeel
03-14-2012, 03:10 PM
Reply
Who Am I?
03-14-2012, 06:37 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
Dislike. :hmm:
Cheesy punny humor should be outlawed. It has no use in society.
That is all.
Reply
unityone
03-16-2012, 12:40 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Who Am I?
Dislike. :hmm:
Cheesy punny humor should be outlawed. It has no use in society.
That is all.
I think that was cute! It made me smile :)
Not sure if it geeky tho...
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Periwinkle18
03-16-2012, 12:52 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
i think its cute too :)
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Who Am I?
03-16-2012, 03:01 PM
Bah...
:raging:
Puns must be destroyed.
Reply
Periwinkle18
03-17-2012, 10:11 AM
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AabiruSabeel
03-25-2012, 08:48 PM
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Periwinkle18
03-26-2012, 01:14 AM
^ lol good one
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'Abd Al-Maajid
03-26-2012, 01:16 PM
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marwen
03-26-2012, 01:19 PM
^ that's terribly geek ! .. and scary .. :exhausted
Reply
marwen
03-28-2012, 10:29 AM
A farmer is out in the middle of a barren hillside, tending to his sheep, when suddenly a black RangeRover comes hurtling towards him. It stops, and a man dressed impeccibly in an Italian suit and wearing designer sunglasses gets out.
"If I can tell you how many sheep you have here," he asks, "can I have one of them?"
The farmer replies "I suppose so.".
The man reaches into his car and pulls out a GPS receiver and laptop, connects it to a satellite phone, and logs onto the internet. He immediately goes to the NASA website, logs into the satellite page, uploads his current latitude and longitude and requests a high resolution thermal satellite image with 20cm resolution. He then runs the image through image processing software which counts all the heat sources. Subtracting two, for himself and the farmer, he proudly announces that there were 483 animals on the hillside.
"That's correct" replies the farmer, to which the man lifts the nearest animal and places it in the back of his Range Rover.
The farmer then asks "If I can tell you what you do for a living, can I have it back?" The man agrees, and the farmer announces with confidence that he's an IT Consultant.
"How did you know that?" he asked.
"Simple really," replies the farmer. "You arrive here without being asked, try to impress me with the latest must-have technology, only to give me the answer to a question which I already knew. More importantly you know absolutely nothing about my business. Now.... can I please have my dog back?"
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AabiruSabeel
04-03-2012, 08:53 PM
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haha..... CD cases, nice one :)
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Periwinkle18
04-04-2012, 07:25 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
AabiruSabeel
haha good one bro i hav cases like those n i do know how to make a delicious zinger burger at home :P
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'Abd Al-Maajid
04-04-2012, 01:55 PM
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Periwinkle18
04-04-2012, 03:17 PM
^lol good one
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marwen
04-05-2012, 03:09 PM
Travelling Salesman Problem : computing complexity.
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Endymion
04-05-2012, 05:01 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
Didn't know there can be twin apples as well :muddlehea I have only seen twin bananas.
Hence qualified to be my new pet :D
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Periwinkle18
04-05-2012, 05:02 PM
^ lol sis i've seen twin strawberries aswell and triplets too :P three strawberries combined :P were yummy though
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Endymion
04-05-2012, 05:14 PM
WERE yummy :unsure: You ... you ATE them :cry:
YOU ATE THEM :grumbling
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Periwinkle18
04-05-2012, 05:20 PM
^well u ate the yummy juicy tomatoes n didnt give any of them to me :p
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Who Am I?
04-05-2012, 06:05 PM
She can have the tomatoes.
I do want those strawberries next time...
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Endymion
04-05-2012, 07:45 PM
I didn't eat them :enough!:
Its a very sad story :cry: They sacrifice their lives to save me from mum's anger :'(
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Periwinkle18
04-06-2012, 05:45 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Endymion
Its a very sad story They sacrifice their lives to save me from mum's anger
excuses, excuses i know :p u must hav made biryani outta them
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Who Am I?
04-07-2012, 12:48 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Endymion
I didn't ate them :enough!:
Its a very sad story :cry: They sacrifice their lives to save me from mum's anger :'(
Ah... a moment of silence for the brave strawberries, then...
......
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Periwinkle18
04-07-2012, 02:41 AM
[QUOTE=Who Am I?;1508932]Ah... a moment of silence for the brave strawberries, then...
......[/QUOTE
shes talking abt the tomatoes i had the strawberries
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Who Am I?
04-07-2012, 09:34 PM
[QUOTE=Periwinkle18;1508938]
format_quote Originally Posted by
Who Am I?
Ah... a moment of silence for the brave strawberries, then...
......[/QUOTE
shes talking abt the tomatoes i had the strawberries
Well she can have the tomatoes. I don't eat those things.
I have strawberries in my refrigerator right now... :p
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Endymion
04-08-2012, 11:51 AM
But dont eat the small ones plz :hiding:
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Scimitar
04-08-2012, 03:11 PM
Didn't know where to post this, so here will do (mods can move if it fits elsewhere better)
Anyway, A friend of mine phoned me to tell me that tescos are selling giant Kinder easter eggs for only £2... I almost went to get one but then I thought "shirk"...
...I also found the whole thing funny. Do I even make sense? Look, don't answer that. Thanks.
Reply
Dagless
04-08-2012, 03:26 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Scimitar
Didn't know where to post this, so here will do (mods can move if it fits elsewhere better)
Anyway, A friend of mine phoned me to tell me that tescos are selling giant Kinder easter eggs for only £2... I almost went to get one but then I thought "shirk"...
...I also found the whole thing funny. Do I even make sense? Look, don't answer that. Thanks.
Wait... back up... is it just that the eggs are made from the kinder chocolate or you get a big toy as well?
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Periwinkle18
04-08-2012, 03:35 PM
omg kinder chocolate eggs i used to love them only because of the toy :p lol
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'Abd Al-Maajid
04-08-2012, 03:36 PM
What is all the fuss about Easter? :phew
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Scimitar
04-08-2012, 03:37 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Dagless
Wait... back up... is it just that the eggs are made from the kinder chocolate or you get a big toy as well?
I asked the same question maaan looool.
Yeah, uhm, BIG TOY, with lots of parts.... Ahhhh man, I'm gonna get one after easter is over - that way its not shirk, right? ;D
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
What is all the fuss about Easter?
Don't you know? We get like Friday off work and the following Monday too (also Saturdays too if you work that day)... long weekend bro. Whoohooo! *pumps fist*
Scimi
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'Abd Al-Maajid
04-08-2012, 04:06 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Scimitar
Don't you know? We get like Friday off work and the following Monday too (also Saturdays too if you work that day)... long weekend bro. Whoohooo! *pumps fist*
wow! sounds cool! :D
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Who Am I?
04-09-2012, 07:52 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Scimitar
I asked the same question maaan looool.
Yeah, uhm, BIG TOY, with lots of parts.... Ahhhh man, I'm gonna get one after easter is over - that way its not shirk, right? ;D
Don't you know? We get like Friday off work and the following Monday too (also Saturdays too if you work that day)... long weekend bro. Whoohooo! *pumps fist*
Scimi
No... not so much here.
No Friday off.
No Monday off.
Regular weekend.
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
04-11-2012, 05:05 PM
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AabiruSabeel
04-11-2012, 09:19 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
04-12-2012, 01:35 PM
I love the calculus part...:p
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Who Am I?
04-13-2012, 05:16 PM
:sl:
Yeah, math jokes go right over my head.
That's what I got for being a history nerd...
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
04-13-2012, 07:46 PM
Reply
AabiruSabeel
04-19-2012, 04:39 PM
If a pizza has a radius 'z' and a depth 'a' that pizza's volume can be defined Pi*z*z*a.
Source: Google+
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Ramadan90
04-19-2012, 04:43 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
AabiruSabeel
If a pizza has a radius 'z' and a depth 'a' that pizza's volume can be defined Pi*z*z*a.
Source: Google+
:lol::giggling:
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Who Am I?
04-20-2012, 03:18 AM
That's a pretty good-looking pizza there...
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Periwinkle18
04-21-2012, 04:24 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
AabiruSabeel
If a pizza has a radius 'z' and a depth 'a' that pizza's volume can be defined Pi*z*z*a.
Source: Google+
all i can say is yummy
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AabiruSabeel
04-30-2012, 07:21 PM
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marwen
04-30-2012, 09:04 PM
^ = 2 ? (if true then I'm a pre-school child)
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Abu Zainab
05-01-2012, 06:41 AM
^ I guess you are right marwen...its seems like 2. But the logic is kinda weird.
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Who Am I?
05-01-2012, 03:51 PM
:sl:
I just zone out whenever I see a math problem. It is my privilege as a history nerd... ;D
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Abu Zainab
05-02-2012, 07:18 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Who Am I?
I just zone out whenever I see a math problem. It is my privilege as a history nerd...
If you look closely the problem has nothing to do with maths at all. That's why even a child could do it. We adults tend to look at it in a completely different perspective. Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
05-02-2012, 08:02 AM
Yes, I think Marwen is right. Really weird logic, Abu Zainab.
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marwen
05-02-2012, 04:34 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Who Am I?
I just zone out whenever I see a math problem. It is my privilege as a history nerd...
History is the sum total of things that could have been avoided.
Konrad Adenauer Reply
Who Am I?
05-02-2012, 04:57 PM
I cheated. :hmm:
It's a shape problem disguised as a math problem.
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
05-05-2012, 01:23 PM
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Al-bint
05-05-2012, 01:39 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
marwen
Travelling Salesman Problem : computing complexity.
This complexity has been making my every moment miserable since quite a few days :raging:.. I opened IB so as to get away from all this but here it is again!!
wasalaam!
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Beardo
05-05-2012, 04:35 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
AabiruSabeel
If a pizza has a radius 'z' and a depth 'a' that pizza's volume can be defined Pi*z*z*a.
Source: Google+
I will never forget that volume formula ever again.
Reply
Person1001
05-05-2012, 06:55 PM
Wow keep it up guys and girls
Reply
Beardo
05-06-2012, 06:56 PM
Lesson in Logic:
If being Muslim makes me a terrorist, then standing in the garage makes you a car.
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sis muslimah
06-08-2012, 01:43 AM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-08-2012, 10:49 PM
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Periwinkle18
06-09-2012, 02:44 AM
^ haha
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Muhaba
06-09-2012, 06:18 PM
now you maake me go through the whole thread. backward. love riddles but the math ones make me dizzy. but i like lookin at the pics
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Abz2000
06-09-2012, 06:47 PM
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
Roses are #FF0000 , Violets are #0000FF , All my base belongs to you
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-09-2012, 10:10 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Abz2000
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
In a world of Linux, who needs Windows and Gates?
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
06-10-2012, 05:46 PM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
06-10-2012, 05:57 PM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
06-13-2012, 02:30 PM
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Periwinkle18
06-13-2012, 04:01 PM
^ haha
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-14-2012, 07:32 AM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-16-2012, 10:39 AM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-17-2012, 12:19 PM
I almost fell laughing at this...;D
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marwen
06-17-2012, 12:21 PM
yeah, as simple as that !
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marwen
06-18-2012, 10:51 AM
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Snowflake
06-20-2012, 07:58 PM
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Periwinkle18
06-21-2012, 09:51 AM
^ lol Haha
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~ Sabr ~
06-21-2012, 09:58 AM
I don't get it?
Edit: I get it now, H202....lol
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Periwinkle18
06-24-2012, 12:18 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-28-2012, 02:23 AM
Just some resistors, capacitors and LEDs
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'Abd Al-Maajid
06-30-2012, 08:21 AM
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Muezzin
07-02-2012, 05:47 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
07-02-2012, 07:06 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
07-07-2012, 05:52 PM
Electronics engineers will know this.
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Periwinkle18
07-08-2012, 01:27 AM
^ lol :P
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Life_Is_Short
07-08-2012, 02:25 AM
I have a good one. :P
What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo?
A woolly jumper!
I cracked it in genetics and everyone burst out laughing. ;D
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Periwinkle18
07-08-2012, 01:26 PM
ahhhh now i get it lol :p
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'Abd Al-Maajid
07-08-2012, 01:28 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Life_Is_Short
I have a good one. :P
What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo?
A woolly jumper!
I cracked it in genetics and everyone burst out laughing. ;D
format_quote Originally Posted by
Periwinkle18
ahhhh now i get it lol :p
I dont get it... :ermm:
Reply
Periwinkle18
07-08-2012, 05:35 PM
umm hes talking abt genetics , i guess u havnt studied bio
Example of a CrossThe following dihybrid cross involves two true breeding pea plants, where two factors are looked at, the shape of the seed and the colour of the seed.
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'Abd Al-Maajid
07-09-2012, 08:54 PM
^ Still dont get it. :exhausted
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'Abd Al-Maajid
07-09-2012, 08:55 PM
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AabiruSabeel
07-10-2012, 12:23 PM
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'Abd Al-Maajid
07-10-2012, 12:29 PM
^ Me Me Me Me....:statisfie
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Periwinkle18
07-11-2012, 02:57 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
AabiruSabeel
not me lol
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dysphoricrocker
07-12-2012, 03:58 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
AabiruSabeel
Who wants to live here?
Honestly, i think it looks ugly. Hehe. But that's just me.
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AabiruSabeel
10-02-2012, 08:02 PM
Reshare from intel:
... it was delicious.
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Pure Purple
10-05-2012, 04:11 PM
capacitors and diodes necklace.
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Periwinkle18
10-06-2012, 03:30 PM
^ cool guess i could make one if i had the stuff
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Futuwwa
10-13-2012, 11:29 AM
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Futuwwa
10-15-2012, 01:10 PM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
10-15-2012, 01:24 PM
^ Where is the BODMAS rule applied? The answer is 0=0 if the BODMAS rule is applied at last but one step which is the right math. The theory could be solved in 2-3 steps..
a=x
a-x=0
a-a=0
0=0
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Futuwwa
10-15-2012, 01:53 PM
The order of operations is not violated anywhere.
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Pure Purple
10-15-2012, 03:51 PM
^Second last step is wrong.How can you cancel( a-x)is zero cannot be cancelled with zero on the L.F.T
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Pure Purple
10-15-2012, 03:58 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Periwinkle18
The following dihybrid cross involves two true breeding pea plants, where two factors are looked at, the shape of the seed and the colour of the seed.
Isme joke kaya hai?I studied this but I was not good in biology sub.
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Futuwwa
10-15-2012, 06:35 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Pure Purple
^Second last step is wrong.How can you cancel( a-x)is zero cannot be cancelled with zero on the L.F.T
Yup, that's it :)
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Al-bint
10-16-2012, 07:22 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Abu Zainab
If you look closely the problem has nothing to do with maths at all. That's why even a child could do it. We adults tend to look at it in a completely different perspective.
i still dinr get it. poor me! :nervous:
Reply
Abu Zainab
10-16-2012, 08:12 AM
^ just count the number of circles sister...for example 6 has one...8 has two and so on
Reply
Pure Purple
10-16-2012, 08:35 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Futuwwa
Yup, that's it
Actually ,Once my brother asked me and I couldn't solved.This question was asked by my brother's school teacher and he solved it.
Reply
Futuwwa
11-16-2012, 10:23 PM
C programming.
It's tedious and pedantic. But only when everything works like it should. When it doesn't, it's the most annoying and frustrating thing there is.
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
12-04-2012, 09:53 AM
Reply
Periwinkle18
12-10-2012, 10:53 AM
Reply
Innocent Soul
12-13-2012, 01:11 PM
:bump:
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Pure Purple
12-13-2012, 03:12 PM
................
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'Abd Al-Maajid
12-13-2012, 03:19 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Pure Purple
hmmm...bumping thread,I don't know whether you finished with integration and derivatives ,here is an easy one.
Math fail!
Integral of milk is Cow + constant! ;D
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
12-15-2012, 07:52 AM
Reply
AabiruSabeel
12-18-2012, 07:50 PM
Binary Watch
Can you tell the time?
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marwen
01-01-2013, 05:46 PM
Did you hear about the Coder that got stuck in his shower for a week?
The instructions on his shampoo said: Lather, rinse, repeat.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Ascii stupid question, get stupid Ansi.
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
01-08-2013, 08:32 AM
So my friend asked me what was my new year's resolution. I replied to him, "720p". :p
Reply
AabiruSabeel
02-08-2013, 04:27 AM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
04-01-2013, 10:06 AM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
04-01-2013, 10:14 AM
Reply
marwen
04-01-2013, 07:46 PM
If there is too many people who mock you, then it means one of two things :
1) whether you are doing really really bad.
2) or you are doing very very good.
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
04-02-2013, 08:07 AM
Reply
Abu Zainab
04-02-2013, 03:46 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
ROTFL
I say that's a very ungeeky way to write the circumference of a circle. Can mislead many a geek. Reply
Qurratul Ayn
04-06-2013, 04:44 PM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
04-19-2013, 09:57 AM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
04-19-2013, 09:57 AM
Reply
Periwinkle18
04-19-2013, 02:26 PM
^ Lol :p
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Periwinkle18
04-29-2013, 04:15 PM
Reply
Al-bint
04-30-2013, 10:14 AM
Reply
Al-bint
04-30-2013, 10:38 AM
that's my theory too :)
:shade:
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'Abd Al-Maajid
04-30-2013, 11:35 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Al-bint
Where is that 'Binary bakwas' thread? :p
Reply
Al-bint
04-30-2013, 12:12 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
'Abd Al-Maajid
Where is that 'Binary bakwas' thread?
is there one such thread?? I dont know :p
Reply
Innocent Soul
04-30-2013, 02:15 PM
Reply
Futuwwa
05-01-2013, 12:36 AM
Noes way, it should be 0xb!
Reply
AabiruSabeel
05-26-2013, 10:45 PM
Reply
AabiruSabeel
05-08-2014, 07:17 PM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
05-09-2014, 02:09 PM
^ I still remember programming in MASM. :)
Reply
AabiruSabeel
11-20-2014, 03:36 AM
Reply
greenhill
11-20-2014, 07:57 AM
This is something my science teacher said as a joke in one of his classes.. I can't remember anything else he taught but I remember this...
If it's alive and kicking it's biology.
If it smells, it's chemistry.
If it does not work, it's physics.
;D
Reply
AabiruSabeel
02-12-2017, 10:05 PM
Reply
Huzaifah ibn Adam
02-12-2017, 10:12 PM
There was a Geeks thread? An official one, even.
Reply
Mustafa16
02-12-2017, 10:56 PM
A proton and a neutron walk into a restaurant, and the neutron asks the charge, and the waiter says, "for you, no charge"
My father once told me, when I asked why we weren't eating any fruit, "why don't we eat the meat's packaging?" "together we will eat the fruits of the industrial revolution,"
Reply
Simple_Person
02-13-2017, 03:40 AM
Simple_Person@IslamicBoard:~# sudo make me a sandwich
hmm:hmm:..strange nobody is making me a sandwhich..what i going on?
Reply
Sorry not a geek[emoji14]
Reply
AabiruSabeel
06-29-2018, 03:38 PM
Reply
Qurratul Ayn
06-29-2018, 11:01 PM
Wow, Ive forgotten this existed. It's nice to see popular threads being revived!
Now the other day my husband sent this to me, so cringy :facepalm:
Reply
KumaShuba
12-05-2022, 08:04 PM
Reply
KumaShuba
12-11-2022, 10:47 PM
Reply
'Abd Al-Maajid
05-17-2023, 08:13 PM
aight time to bump tis tread.
Reply
Cooper Joseph
05-19-2023, 05:27 AM
Reply
jessamin
05-22-2023, 02:31 PM
System32 is very important. You wouldn't want to delete it, hehe
Reply
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