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Ansariyah
01-17-2012, 12:36 AM
Salam

I'm in school with this Muslim guy. I've made it very clear to him in the beginning of the term that he shouldn't talk to me in appropiately. Anyway now he's more careful, but he keeps saying to me this every morning when I come to class 'The heart greets ya warmly my love'! I need his Shakespeare twilight arsed soap opera crap GONE. He emberasses me in front of the whole class. A close friend of mine heard him gossip to other guys that he wants to see if I will slap him one day, and apparently that's what he wants. What a creep!

Brothers, Sisters, what should I do?
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CosmicPathos
01-17-2012, 12:38 AM
how old is he?

And how does him saying that embarasses you? The class should rather be laughing at this modern-day Shakespear!

I guess just complain to the teacher? :S
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Abz2000
01-17-2012, 12:49 AM
Looooooooooooooooolllllllllllll!

sorry, i couldn't help laughing at the way you described it
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yahia12
01-17-2012, 12:51 AM
Try to ignore him at first, to do so you need have a lot of patience. Do not pay attention to anything he is doing. I would suggest complain to the dean.
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sis muslimah
01-17-2012, 12:55 AM
just ignore, dont respond how long is he going to keep on doing that then or i dunno mayb get ur dad or someone to talk and scare him :s i duno what the teachers would do though coz in my skool nothing much is done in these situations the student just gets told off and thats it
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Tyrion
01-17-2012, 12:56 AM
I'm guessing you're in High School? If so, just report him to the teacher. Or kick him in his "special place". ;)
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joyous fairy
01-17-2012, 01:07 AM
Walaikum salam


Just slap him one :p

Messing, report him to a tutor, or tell him if he carries on you will report him.
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UmmuShaheed
01-17-2012, 01:10 AM
Dont even look at him, when you come into class. Make sure its visible you have headphones on. Blast your quran and don't even make eye contact. It's going to be clear you don't care about a thing he says
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Abdullahi E
01-17-2012, 01:22 AM
Originally Posted by Ansariyah
Salam

I'm in school with this Muslim guy. I've made it very clear to him in the beginning of the term that he shouldn't talk to me in appropiately.
i would say to u not tell to teacher but tell to one of ur muslim family member to tell him to fear Allah swt and stop what he is doing
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Darth Ultor
01-17-2012, 01:31 AM
You could always run him over and make it look like an accident :D. I'm just kidding, you'd have to answer the Heavenly interrogation if you do that. Go to your Principal/Headteacher and report him for harassment. If that doesn't work, have your parents talk to his if you go to the same Mosque.
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Abz2000
01-17-2012, 01:34 AM
if u do decide to slap him, please let us know beforehand and then update the thread when u return
i can imagine a description of the whole class going silent and turning around.
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serena77
01-17-2012, 01:46 AM
salaams sister
i think ignoring him is best. He wants a reaction. Don't give it to him... ignore him completely... don't make eye contact... don't let it be obvious your feathers are ruffled.. anything...
Serena
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syilla
01-17-2012, 02:24 AM
remind me of my hubby lol how i hated him but at that time i've finished my schools lol.

Please do not hate him so much because i think there is a hadith saying that if you hate someone too much it'll turn it to the opposite way.
so just be cool and try to stay calm. you have to try learn all the techniques you can lol
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tigerkhan
01-17-2012, 04:09 AM
:sl:
just no comments......................but if in pakistan someone do it to any girl of my family, i just break his arms.
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ardianto
01-17-2012, 04:37 AM
Assalamualaikum.

Adolescence is a period in which a child grows very rapidly toward adulthood. But the very rapid growth also led to mental instability and personality. it could cause them to behave strangely.

Adolescence is also a period in which a person starts sexually attracted to opposite gender and start to feel like to get a partner. Also, adolescence is a time where someone starts looking for a personality. Unfortunately the city teenager today is strongly influenced by pop culture like movies that did not reflect real life, but they think that's right.

Now we go to the case.

That guy has a special feeling to sister Ansariyah, however, sister Ansariyah did not give him a response, might be because sister Ansariyah did not know about it.

It causes that guy was disappointed and also angry. So he does an act of revenge by constantly teasing sister Ansariyah, because he actually wants to get attention from sister Ansariyah in any form. Instability of personality that makes him do this.

And he did it in front of a crowd because he wanted people view him as "The Love Warrior" who never give up to get the girl he wants. Usually this is caused by the influence of pop movies.

No wonder if he wants sister Ansariyah slap him, as this will make him proud and feel as The Love Warrior that do not easily give up. So sister Ansariyah should never slap him.

Okay, now to sister Ansariyah. What you must do is ignore him, in the proper way that will make him stop teasing you.

I give you a tip. Train yourself to remain calm, and train your facial expressions so as not to be seen if you feel annoyed by this guy. when he's bothering you, people will see your face expression. And if you look disturbed, then people would love to see him as a The Love Warrior who never give up.

So, you have to do when he's teasing you in front of crowds is to stay calm, keep a straight face, and say hello to your female friends. Let's just that guy is not there. then people will look towards him and view him as a loser who does not receive the attention from the girl that he expect.

This will make him feel ashamed, and Insha Allah, he will stop disturb you.
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Amat Allah
01-17-2012, 12:52 PM
Wa AlikumAssalaam Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaatuh

O honey, Ignoring is the cure after Allah in shaa Allah...

Never make him push ya to do anything wrong but just be calm and strong like arock and also don`t forget to pray for the poor guy to be guided and for thewhole world too

If I was in your place then I would be laughing from inside for such sillinessbut showing nothing, such guys make me laugh and I really feel pity and sorryfor them , May Allah guide them Ameeen...

just try yourbest my dear and precious sister to make your school days the best and have somuch of fun as long as you are still having them and whenever you face anythingthen remember that it is nothing and just turn it to something funny in shaaAllah...

May Allah bewith ya and be pleased with ya and May He The Exalted guide us all Ameeeen

Love ya my darling for the sake of Allah ...

Take care of your precious self...
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Hamza Asadullah
01-17-2012, 01:09 PM
Originally Posted by Ansariyah
Salam

I'm in school with this Muslim guy. I've made it very clear to him in the beginning of the term that he shouldn't talk to me in appropiately. Anyway now he's more careful, but he keeps saying to me this every morning when I come to class 'The heart greets ya warmly my love'! I need his Shakespeare twilight arsed soap opera crap GONE. He emberasses me in front of the whole class. A close friend of mine heard him gossip to other guys that he wants to see if I will slap him one day, and apparently that's what he wants. What a creep!

Brothers, Sisters, what should I do?
:sl:

What he wants from you is a reaction. He wants to wind you up which thus far he is successful at. So what you need to do is not to react. Just completely ignore him and act as though he does not exist. He will eventually get boted and stop trying.

Maybe tell him you will inform your brother or male relative if he continues just to scare him a bit so he backs off, but the main thing to do is to ignore him and not teact to him.
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Who Am I?
01-17-2012, 05:12 PM
:sl:

Bah, ardianto already stole my thunder. Brother, you've been lurking over at the Something Awful forums too, haven't you? ;D

I see that the myth of the "Nice Guy" is prevalent even in Islamic culture. This guy you describe, he reminds me a lot of how I used to be. He fancies himself a chivalric knight, but in reality, he is a seething mass of anger and rage, because how dare you not return his affection?!?

This is what he is thinking: "Don't you realize that I am the perfect guy for you? I will take care of you and treat you better than any other guy. I am your prince, and you are my princess." Then later, as time goes on and his affections are not returned, he becomes angrier: "I can't believe that you don't see how perfect I am for you. What is your problem?"

As others have said, ignoring this guy is the best way to make him go away. The more he talks, the stupider he makes himself look.

One day he'll realize that you don't care, and he'll get over it, and move on. It happened to me.
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Ghazalah
01-17-2012, 05:15 PM
Wslm...

Ignore him. People like this feed off attention, so once he sees you are giving him none he will let it go. Plus, I'm pretty sure his 'joke' will die down soon. They always do with losers like him.

Or, if it get's too much, speak to the teacher about it.

I had a similar problem when I was your age, so I told my brother, he had a few 'words' with them :p and that was the last of it. He even apologised to me ^o)
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ژاله
01-17-2012, 05:25 PM
.............................
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Ramadan90
01-17-2012, 05:26 PM
As our brothers and sisters mentioned here, the best thing you can do is to completely ignore him and dont look annoyed when he keeps doing it. Eventually, he will feel embarresed and feel like a loser.
Reply

Riana17
01-17-2012, 05:27 PM
Originally Posted by ardianto
Assalamualaikum.

Adolescence is a period in which a child grows very rapidly toward adulthood. But the very rapid growth also led to mental instability and personality. it could cause them to behave strangely.

Adolescence is also a period in which a person starts sexually attracted to opposite gender and start to feel like to get a partner. Also, adolescence is a time where someone starts looking for a personality. Unfortunately the city teenager today is strongly influenced by pop culture like movies that did not reflect real life, but they think that's right.

Now we go to the case.

That guy has a special feeling to sister Ansariyah, however, sister Ansariyah did not give him a response, might be because sister Ansariyah did not know about it.

It causes that guy was disappointed and also angry. So he does an act of revenge by constantly teasing sister Ansariyah, because he actually wants to get attention from sister Ansariyah in any form. Instability of personality that makes him do this.

And he did it in front of a crowd because he wanted people view him as "The Love Warrior" who never give up to get the girl he wants. Usually this is caused by the influence of pop movies.

No wonder if he wants sister Ansariyah slap him, as this will make him proud and feel as The Love Warrior that do not easily give up. So sister Ansariyah should never slap him.

Okay, now to sister Ansariyah. What you must do is ignore him, in the proper way that will make him stop teasing you.

I give you a tip. Train yourself to remain calm, and train your facial expressions so as not to be seen if you feel annoyed by this guy. when he's bothering you, people will see your face expression. And if you look disturbed, then people would love to see him as a The Love Warrior who never give up.

So, you have to do when he's teasing you in front of crowds is to stay calm, keep a straight face, and say hello to your female friends. Let's just that guy is not there. then people will look towards him and view him as a loser who does not receive the attention from the girl that he expect.

This will make him feel ashamed, and Insha Allah, he will stop disturb you.

haha gotchaaa, oh this thread brings back memories
actually, back then nobody courted me for real lol
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Who Am I?
01-17-2012, 05:31 PM
:sl:

As I said before, I was That Guy. The guy who asked out all of the girls, and then laughed it off when they said no. "Ah, I was only kidding anyway. You're not my type." ;D

It's not something I am proud of, but it does give me a little insight into situations like this one.
Reply

ardianto
01-18-2012, 01:56 AM
Originally Posted by Who Am I?
I see that the myth of the "Nice Guy" is prevalent even in Islamic culture. This guy you describe, he reminds me a lot of how I used to be. He fancies himself a chivalric knight, but in reality, he is a seething mass of anger and rage, because how dare you not return his affection?!?

This is what he is thinking: "Don't you realize that I am the perfect guy for you? I will take care of you and treat you better than any other guy. I am your prince, and you are my princess." Then later, as time goes on and his affections are not returned, he becomes angrier: "I can't believe that you don't see how perfect I am for you. What is your problem?"
:sl:

The guy in this case does not regard himself as Knight, but as Conqueror.

A guy who regard himself as knight will not embarass the girl he expect in front of many people. What he do is show that girl that he can be the protector, will always come when that girl need him, etc. But guys like this are often over-acting, such as act like bodyguards for the girls or offer help too much. Finally they will make the girls feel annoyed too.

"The conquerors" are guys who feel they can get everything that they want. When a guy like this try to approach a girl but this girl refuse or ignore him, he will revenge to make this girl knows, she cannot refuse/ignore him.

Like in this case. That guy tried to approach sister Ansariyah but she refused him [I've made it very clear to him in the beginning of the term that he shouldn't talk to me in appropiately]. This disturbing his arrogance as the conqueror. Then he made revenge to sister Ansariyah [Anyway now he's more careful, but he keeps saying to me this every morning when I come to class 'The heart greets ya warmly my love'!]. He knows, it would embarass sister Ansariyah [He emberasses me in front of the whole class]. The message behind this action is "Do not underestimate me".

The conqueror does not like to make compromise, but prefer to destroyed. Compromise does not matched with his pride. This is a desperation, actually. Notice this case [A close friend of mine heard him gossip to other guys that he wants to see if I will slap him one day, and apparently that's what he wants].

Actually, cases like this is pretty much found among adolescents, although not always in the same form.


@sister Ansariyah. I hope you did not mind if I analyze your case.

:)
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Who Am I?
01-18-2012, 02:02 AM
:wa:

Brother ardianto, I think you just analyzed me as a teenager. :hmm:

I'll get my coat...
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Tawangar
01-18-2012, 04:54 AM
Forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them so much.
Oscar Wilde.:p
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peace_maker
01-18-2012, 04:27 PM
I will advice you to NOT to slap him, not at any cost. Probably, he wants a reaction or just want you to touch him. Even if it is a slap, it'll do.. That's how they really are. So just don't lose your temper... Ignore him completely. If he comes to talk to you, tell him that you don't want to. Because, I think if you don't respond to his words, then he might get sore and try something bigger and badder. May Allah forbid that. If he doesn't stop then, threaten him that you'll complain about him to your dad or someone. If the problem still persists, then don't hesitate to involve your elder family member. Many a times, we keep them away from such things due to generation gap or whatever it maybe... But the truth is, they know how to handle such matters at best. And finally, REPORT HIM.
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GuestFellow
01-18-2012, 11:30 PM
Report him to the teacher. Do not slap him...kick him in the nuts instead.
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Who Am I?
01-19-2012, 03:51 AM
:sl:

TT, that sig is either the biggest glass of water ever or the best wave I've ever seen.

That is all.
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Ansariyah
01-22-2012, 10:32 PM
Thanks each and everyone who replied to my thread. Your advice helped me a lot and I'm going to put all into action, as I have done so already but so far he's still doing the same thing to me. The other day he pulled my chair for me and said 'At your service my princess'. It's pretty amusing, but it get's really bad when people start telling it to everyone else in my school (being the talk of town). I dread that thought and just want to be left alone.

I'm going to be patient and continue acting like he doesn't exist. I don't know what he we'll do next. I hope the pervert moves the heck on!
Jzk.
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Ğħαrєєвαħ
01-22-2012, 11:26 PM
AsSalaamu Alaaykum

As others have mentioned try avoid him as much as possible and ignore him. And if he ever tries to speak to you then straight out tell him to fear Allaah, unless he's not muslim :|, then i'd just continue to ignore him and report him.

I agree with br. Ardianto.
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~ Sabr ~
01-24-2012, 01:31 PM
Just tell him to fear Allah.
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peace_maker
01-24-2012, 08:47 PM
Ahah! I've got a brilliant idea! Next time he offers help, tell him, "Thank you, BROTHER." That outta keep him away! ;D
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Paprika
01-27-2012, 01:33 PM
Originally Posted by Ansariyah
Salam

I'm in school with this Muslim guy. I've made it very clear to him in the beginning of the term that he shouldn't talk to me in appropiately. Anyway now he's more careful, but he keeps saying to me this every morning when I come to class 'The heart greets ya warmly my love'! I need his Shakespeare twilight arsed soap opera crap GONE. He emberasses me in front of the whole class. A close friend of mine heard him gossip to other guys that he wants to see if I will slap him one day, and apparently that's what he wants. What a creep!

Brothers, Sisters, what should I do?
Forget the slap, knee him where it hurts the most, I guarantee you he won't be coming back for more....:raging:
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