Regret

[some1iknow]

when i was younger, i did something i regret to this day. i stole money from my grandma. it was a one time thing. i have to admit that at the time i didnt care because of how badly that woman treated my mother. i hated her for the pain she put my mom through and the termoil that resulted because of it. i dont even remeber what that money was spent on. Still, that doesnt make it ok. it's always been in the back of my mind. i've never forgotten about it even now as an adult.

im not a thief. i have never done anything like that before nor have i since.

its been weighing on me more so now that my grandma has passed away about a year ago. i dont feel bad for her. as wrong as it is to say, im glad she's gone. but that doesnt change the fact that what i did was very wrong.

what do i need to do to correct this? should i donate that amount of money to a charity in her name? im lost. any help would be much appreciated.

[Alpha Dude]

should i donate that amount of money to a charity in her name? im lost. any help would be much appreciated.

Sounds like a good idea. Though, do it whilst having no ill feeling toward her.

Also, ask Allah for forgiveness.

[جوري]

Waallatheena jaoo min baAAdihim yaqooloona rabbana ighfir lana waliikhwanina allatheena sabaqoona bialeemani wala tajAAal fee quloobina ghillan lillatheena amanoo rabbana innaka raoofun raheemun

59:10 And those who came after them say: "Our Lord! Forgive us, and our brethren who came before us into the Faith, and leave not, in our hearts, rancour (or sense of injury) against those who have believed. Our Lord! Thou art indeed Full of Kindness, Most Merciful."

Try to find it in your heart to forgive you know.. I was the same way about some members of my extended family.. When I was a kid my aunt and grandmother from my dad's side hated us so much whenever I was left in their care they'd lock me in the balcony until one of my parents came to pick me up so as to not mess her house up at least that was her excuse amongst other things like frank discrimination and humiliation during Eid when all the kids would visit.. be that as it may whenever I made du3a I used to always exclude them. I'd make du3a for random strangers and exclude them and then I felt very badly about that and started including them.. one day very recently I had a dream she had cancer.. and a couple of months later she found out that she has advanced breast cancer and when I think about all the petty things that happened it is honestly not worth it to hold a grudge you must rise above it. You must also make sincere repentance because what you did is a crime even if it is a one time thing and yes as Br. Alpha said give that money to a charity she'd in her name..
and ask for forgiveness for her, yourself and all Muslims.. maybe one day future generations would grant us the same when we're long perished..

:w:

[some1iknow]

i will donate that money in her name and ask God for forgiveness for what i did. i really do regret and feel bad for what i did. not because of the person effected, but because i let myself go down to her level.

thanks for the help. i really appreciate it.