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View Full Version : ***** Marriage Dilemma.... Need Advice Please



AlBawasel
09-12-2012, 04:46 PM
Assalamu Alaikum

I have a dilemma that i would like to get some insight on.

I have been married for the 2 and half years now. I am in the U.S and chose to do an islamic marriage not a Civil marriage, so it only involved
me, my wife, the Imam, and witnesses of course. It was done in the Mosque according to the Sharea'a.

The imam asked me to stop a week later to pick up the unofficial marriage certificate ( it was NOT a government official certificate and it did
NOT need to be filed with the city nor the government, just an unofficial certificate for our records) ... I went the week after and the
certificate wasn't ready yet. I was told to go the following week, but then i had to leave the country for a few months, and when i returned the
Imam had gone back to his native country for good. I didn't mind because at some point down the road we were going to file an official certificate with the city, but we have not yet.

Problem is this, unfortunately, things are not working out and we are looking to get divorced ( we have been trying for a year now to make things
work, but it's not happening).

Today i went to the Mosque to ask if there's anything to do as far as the unofficial certificate, and they said they don't have it and they can't
contact the Imam that performed the marriage.

My question is, how do i go about doing the divorce at this point ?

jazakom allah kol el khair.
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جوري
09-13-2012, 04:04 AM
Oh wow.. sob7an Allah this is indeed a dilemma.. I don't think anyone here is equipped to give you sharia advise. My first instinct was to tell you to marry her again in the mosque and make sure you walk out of there with a certificate and try to work on your marriage and if it doesn't work then divorce is an option. But this is really serious and someone's honor can come into question if you don't produce a paper or if you leave her because things aren't working out and she remains married per witnesses, per an imam that no can't be contacted but nothing can be done about it officially. I implore you if you ever cared for this woman to do the right thing, remarry her and try to work it out, give it a go!
This isn't intended as an advise to do with sharia at all, it is my personal opinion of this situation.

:w:
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Riana17
09-13-2012, 06:18 AM
Salam

I agree with Sister, leave her with respect.
Sad to hear the marriage didnt work out.

May Allah bless you both on the path you choose.
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AlBawasel
09-13-2012, 07:47 AM
Thank you for the response.... believe me we tried and tried, and we have been doing that for almost 2 years now.

Since the marriage was done at a mosque with witnesses, the Imam there told me the certificate is unofficial and by Islam, if you say that Talaq to her and wait for 4 months, she will be divorced.

Now you are telling me that i need to remarry her, i am getting more confused. I would never want to hurt her or mess with her honor, la samah Allah.

I just need to end this peacefully and move on.
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جوري
09-13-2012, 09:48 AM
I implicitly said I don't know enough about Shari3a to give you a ruling that you can chisel into a stone tablet just my personal opinion - you must consult with a scholar - I don't mean to confuse you. When he gives you a ruling come back and share with us so we too can learn!

:w:
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