Be There for Teenagers
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Teenagers
It is widely known that one of the best things you can do for your teen is to simply be there for them. The gift of time and attention is more valuable than any material thing you can give them.As parents, we should be there for our teens. This means taking an active interest in their activities (go to their sports events, school functions) and try to include them in yours (taking them to the mosque, their relatives etc).
It may be difficult depending on how many children we have, but we should try and set aside specific times for one-on-one activities and give them your undivided attention. If your teens want to talk and you are in the middle of something, try to stop what you are doing and listen.In a long haddith, there is an important lesson as follows:It was narrated that ‘Awn Abu Juhayfah said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) established the bond of brotherhood between Salman and Abu’l-Dardaa’. Salmaan went to visit Abu’l-Dardaa’ and he saw Umm al-Dardaa’ looking unkempt. He said to her, “What is the matter with you?” She said, “Your brother Abu’l-Dardaa’ has no interest in this world.” Then Abu’l-Dardaa’ came (to visit Salmaan) and he made food for him, but he said, “I am fasting.” He said, “I will not eat until you eat.” So he ate. When night came, Abu’l-Dardaa’ went to stand
in prayer. [Salmaan] said to him, “Go to sleep.” He slept a while, then he went to stand in
prayer. [Salmaan] said to him, “Go to sleep.” When the end of the night came, Salmaan said to him, “Now get up.” They prayed, then Salmaan said
“Your Lord has rights over you, your own self has rights over you and your family has rights over you. Give each one who has rights over you his rights.”
[Abu'l-Dardaa'] came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and told him about that, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, "Salmaan spoke the truth."
From the above, we see the rights Islam has given to ones family.In fact, one of the reasons teenagers (and children in general) misbehave is because it’s the only way to get their busy parents’ attention. Children who feel overlooked will misbehave to get any kind of parent attention. This may sound silly, but it may even means being yelled at or punished another way. And it may get to the stage that punishment works as a reward for the attention starved children.
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2 Replies
- AqsaMay 4th 2011
Asslam’o'alaikum, I am a teenager. I read your topic. Masha’Allah, it’s very encouraging.
I want to adapt to the rules of Islam.
I really want to be great believer of Islam. The first thing I want to know is some way I can always keep consistant with my prayers. I do pray, but sometimes they are left. I feel very bad leaving any namaz. Then if I miss it once, there are more chances I miss it again. Please give me an advice as to how I can stay consistant.
For example, can you tell me something so that I will never forget how important namaz it. It doesn’t matter wheter it be scary or persuasive, but please do let me know. Thanks! Once again, you did an awsome job! =) - NASIMAMar 12th 2012
wa salaam, Mashallah you are keen to keep to your prayers, Allahumdulillah i have 3 teens and when they delay or miss their salah i get them to watch clips on youtube about death and missing prayers, you will find lots of advice and hair standing scenes about missing salah and Inshallah it will make you more aware. inshallah this helps you, I pray Allah guides us all aameen.
http://islam4parents.com
Scimi