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Periwinkle18
10-25-2012, 08:32 AM
Assalam o alikum

Just wanted to ask umm what do you do when you r like extremely sad ?? what makes u feel better??

n what do u do when you know someone real close to u is upset??
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'Abd-al Latif
10-25-2012, 11:46 AM
:salamext:

I would ask what I or the person in question has done to displease Allah. Allah is al-awwal (The First) so all matters will originate from Him, and it is ultimately our own wrongdoing towards al-awwal that has caused us to suffer.

One must blame oneself for suffering from our own problems; but since it is prohibited to be pessimistic of Allah, I would return back to Allah and make amends with Him.

If we first rectify our state with Allah then that is the first step to correcting the problems that have befallen us – and ultimately feeling happy again.
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Periwinkle18
10-25-2012, 11:53 AM
But sometimes its not ur fault things just happen tht make u sad what would u do then?
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'Abd-al Latif
10-25-2012, 12:07 PM
Whatever of misfortune or sadness that one suffers from, it is ultimately the fault of one's own self. Allah says in the Qur'an that "Whatsoever of evil that has befallen you, it is the earning of your own hands". This shows that Allah never wrongs anyone and it is the 'abd that does the wrong to herself.

Having said this, the verse shows consistency in Allah's sunnah as it ends with: "But He forgives much". Meaning, turn back to Him and don't be pessimistic. Who in the heavens and on Earth can lift your burdens if Allah doesn't will it so? Allah tries His servants with trials and tribulations so that they return back to Him to obedience. You should respond to this trial with obedience and repentance.
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Hulk
10-25-2012, 12:16 PM
I try to remind myself of this hadith.

The Messenger of Allah sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said:
"Strange is the affair of the mu'min (the believer). Verily, all his affairs are good for him. If something pleasing befalls him he thanks (Allah) and it becomes better for him. And if something harmful befalls him he is patient (saabir) and it becomes better for him. And this is only for the mu'min."
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Innocent Soul
10-25-2012, 12:49 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Periwinkle18
what do you do when you r like extremely sad ?? what makes u feel better??
Sometimes reading the translation of Quran really helps because it makes us realize that this world id just full of hardships and sorrows. I also try doing something in which I get completely involved. I try to help others and remember it always works. If they don't appreciate you it makes you feel that you can definitely make a difference by helping others without expecting anything in return.


format_quote Originally Posted by Periwinkle18
what do u do when you know someone real close to u is upset??
I try to show her the wisdom in everything happens try to remind her that it's just a matter of sometime. Try to cheer her up by playing something with her or cracking jokes or anything similar. If she don't respond and is still quiet then I think leaving her alone for sometime is the best thing to do.

I don't do all of these but you can do this.

format_quote Originally Posted by Periwinkle18
But sometimes its not ur fault
I will not let the deeds of any doer among you go to waste, male or female-you are both the same in that respect. Those who have left their homes and were driven from their homes, and [who] suffered harm in My Way and fought and were killed,
I will erase their bad actions and admit them into Gardens with rivers flowing under them, as a reward from Allah. The best of all rewards is with Allah.
(Surah Al 'Imran: 195)
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IbnAbdulHakim
10-25-2012, 04:53 PM
2 rakaat nawwafil -durood shareef and then lots of dhikr with eyes closed and tongue not moving.


assalamu alaikum
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Ramadan90
10-25-2012, 05:07 PM
First of all sister, I think it is important to understand that it is human to be sad/down sometimes. And as my brother Abd-al latif said, it is mainly due to sins. Therefore, increase your worship and ask repentence from Allah. Seclude yourself for some hours and only worship Allah(dikr,salah,reading quran). I promise you that you will feel such happiness and contentment in your heart afterwards sister.
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tw009
10-25-2012, 05:29 PM
Pray Nawafil and make long dua. Pour your heart out to Him only. Don't share your sadness with anyone except Him.
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Banu_Hashim
10-25-2012, 06:01 PM
I try to keep busy, be around close friends etc. And ofc ourse I try to be closer to my deen. Knowing that Allah is always listening and this life is only temporary helps a lot.
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GuestFellow
10-25-2012, 08:36 PM
Sleep. Eat. Exercise. Pray. Read. Shower. Laugh.
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Pygoscelis
10-25-2012, 08:58 PM
My dog never fails to comfort me when I am sad. He doesn't care what happened, if I did anything wrong, or what happened to me. He just knows I am sad and wants to be there for me. Unconditional love is a wonderful and comforting thing.
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piXie
10-25-2012, 09:41 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Periwinkle18
Just wanted to ask umm what do you do when you r like extremely sad ?? what makes u feel better??
crying :unhappy:
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yahia12
10-25-2012, 10:38 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by 'Abd-al Latif
:salamext:

I would ask what I or the person in question has done to displease Allah. Allah is al-awwal (The First) so all matters will originate from Him, and it is ultimately our own wrongdoing towards al-awwal that has caused us to suffer.

One must blame oneself for suffering from our own problems; but since it is prohibited to be pessimistic of Allah, I would return back to Allah and make amends with Him.

If we first rectify our state with Allah then that is the first step to correcting the problems that have befallen us – and ultimately feeling happy again.


So how can we differentiate whether if its a punishment from Allah swt or a trial ?I wish this matter to be crystal clear. It's absolutely crucial that muslims distinguishes faulty deeds from trials.

This ayah says:

"We will test you with something of fear, and hunger and loss of wealth, and souls and vegetation. And give glad tidings to those who have patience. Those who if in any difficulty or trial, or tribulation occurs to them or happens to them, they say: 'Verily We are from Allah and to Allah we return.' They are those who will receive prayers from their Lord and Mercy and it is those who are guided."

Mentioned in hadith bukhari and muslim:

The Prophet (sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam) said
"Whoever Allah wants good for him, he puts them to test. He puts them through difficulties. Like a diamond or some metal that has to be burnt and then that which is bad from it is removed so that you have that which is the pure diamond or the pure gold or whatever. Put them to tests, trials and difficulties."


or:

"There is no difficulty that happens to a Muslim except that Allaah removes a sin because of it even if a thorn pricks him and even to that degree."
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Periwinkle18
10-26-2012, 06:17 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by piXie
crying :unhappy:
Crying makes u feel better? Makes me feel horrible :s
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glo
10-26-2012, 06:25 AM
When I am sad, I love to go for a long walk and pray as I walk.
I pray for clarity and guidance from God, and that he may change my heart towards his will rather than my own desires.

Often (although not always) by the time I come back, I am in a different frame of mind.
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Aprender
10-26-2012, 06:26 AM
I remember the first time I got sad as a Muslim was when I realized the state of oppressed Muslims in the Middle East and other parts of the world. It was like shock to my heart. Never cared about those people before I took my shahada but then it just hit me all at once. Like waking up from a coma. I couldn't help but be sad about it.

When I feel sad I usually go outside and watch the birds, watch youtube videos of babies laughing or cute furry animals. But I do that after listening to Quran recitation or reading Quran. Sometimes I try to occupy my mind with trying to learn a new chapter to recite in Arabic. It's usually horrible but I try. It gives me more verses to work with during salah.

When someone close to me is upset I attack them with hugs, smiles and love. It usually works and they start laughing instead of frowning but only after I've given the friend time alone.
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Periwinkle18
04-30-2013, 12:38 PM
:bump:

Any tips?? For someone who's kinda sad and worryish(I know Thts not a word sounds good) at the same time?
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sister herb
04-30-2013, 12:54 PM
When I am sad I

for a little, then try to think something else - if possible. If not possible, I go to my bed and decide I will never come out from my blanket.



I try to remember that being sad and worry is just one part of the life - just like being happy some other times. Ooops, this I don´t think when I am still under the blanket, but at the other times.
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Periwinkle18
04-30-2013, 12:59 PM
Aww ur sweet buh no matter how much u think n keep telling urself I Duno it just doesn't work for me :s

Alhumdulilah ala kuli haul I guess, I guess I should keep praying tht kinda makes me feel better.
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sister herb
04-30-2013, 01:01 PM
You have to do what is the best way to you - and you know it better than we others.

p.s. I can borrow you my extra blanket, if you need to try my way later...
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ardianto
12-11-2013, 05:44 PM
Today I visited by guests, husband and wife. I was chatting and laughing with them, and they looked happy. But when they left me, suddenly this feeling came again.

This is the feeling which always comes whenever I see a happiness between a husband and wife.

Does crying makes me better?. No! crying just something that inevitable when I am realy sad, but does not makes me feel better. Like in last of the last month when I was sad for three days, was crying few times and always asking "why?". But then I realize, this is a destiny and I must accept it.

Like today when this feeling came again. I told myself, this is a destiny, and I must accept it. This made me better.

Now I just want to smile and live my life again. :)
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ILuvAllah
12-11-2013, 11:12 PM
Try to pray Tahajjud (the night prayer) and listen to Surah Baqarah with headphones.
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Salahudeen
12-11-2013, 11:28 PM
Sleep as much as I can till it passes.
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AsheSkyler
12-13-2013, 05:25 AM
I like to listen to music and do something with my hands, like crochet. I've always got some project I want to work on and it makes me happy. Right now I'm making some soft balls for the kids of the family.
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ardianto
12-14-2013, 02:40 PM
I wrote my previous post on Wednesday. On Thursday I went with my kids to buy sleeping bag and camping equipment for my eldest son. We were shopping in two different places, and dined out too. They looked happy, and seeing my kids happiness made me feel better.
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Innocent Soul
12-19-2013, 01:17 PM
Spending time with family is really something that everyone should do. Parents are mostly worried for our future and for me seeing them happy makes me happy.
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truthseeker63
12-19-2013, 02:06 PM
WS I read the Quran or I might read some other Book or Call a Friend.
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Periwinkle18
12-21-2013, 05:02 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by ILuvAllah
Try to pray Tahajjud (the night prayer) and listen to Surah Baqarah with headphones.
JazakAllahu khayrun so true the Quran does help , "verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find its rest". May Allah bless u n keep u happy always ameen


format_quote Originally Posted by AsheSkyler
I like to listen to music and do something with my hands, like crochet. I've always got some project I want to work on and it makes me happy. Right now I'm making some soft balls for the kids of the family.
oh no music is wayyyyyy to dangerous for me lol (dun listen to it anyways alhumdulillah), well tbh wen i'm sad/down I don't feel like dng anything because i'll keep thinking abt the thing tht made me sad lol but talking to someone helps at times, and helping someone out helps lol tht makes me really happy, to see someone happy..And Alhumdulillah now wen ever I feel down its the Quran tht cheers me up alhumdulillah :)
format_quote Originally Posted by ardianto
I wrote my previous post on Wednesday. On Thursday I went with my kids to buy sleeping bag and camping equipment for my eldest son. We were shopping in two different places, and dined out too. They looked happy, and seeing my kids happiness made me feel better.
aww mashaAllah :)


format_quote Originally Posted by Innocent Soul
Spending time with family is really something that everyone should do. Parents are mostly worried for our future and for me seeing them happy makes me happy.
hmm could try tht out..


format_quote Originally Posted by truthseeker63
WS I read the Quran or I might read some other Book or Call a Friend.
:) reading does help.
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BeTheChange
01-01-2014, 02:51 PM
What is happiness and sadness but temporarily feelings?

Feelings do play a massive part of my life though unfortunately.

I do all the bad things when am sad. I comfort eat until my stomach is full and until the feeling of 'good' kicks in, i seclude myself from people and stay quite and i sleep loads to stay away from reality.

All the things that doesn't help an individual.
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muratSul
01-01-2014, 03:33 PM
As-salamu alaykum,

When I'm depressed, I usually read a book, watch a movie or take a nap. Talking to somebody helps too.
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