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GuestFellow
12-17-2012, 10:44 PM
:wa:

I was coming back from WORK. I usually go into town for a while. Most people think I'm a school student. XD I take off my tie and my shirt is not tucked in. o_o

I saw this ADORABLE little girl standing in the middle of the shopping mall. She must have been about 5 years old or even younger. She looked lost and was crying. To me no one was actually going to help her. I am NOT the type of person to interfere in these situations, but I was going to ask the little girl where her parents were.

Her dad spotted her. He was in some designer clothes shop. Anyway, I dashed off. People can get the wrong idea these days. I doubt anyone even noticed I was walking towards the girl.

Was I about to do something stupid?
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Cabdullahi
12-17-2012, 10:50 PM
I'm worried for you guestfellow...i really am
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GuestFellow
12-17-2012, 10:53 PM
^ Okay. Your worse than my auntie. o_o

Anyway, is it bad to help kids if they appear to be lost? This child was lost, but only for a few minutes. The way I was dressed may have given people the impression I was up to no good. And no, I'm not a Pee Da File (PDF).
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Cabdullahi
12-17-2012, 11:01 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by GuestFellow
^ Okay. Your worse than my auntie. o_o

Anyway, is it bad to help kids if they appear to be lost? This child was lost, but only for a few minutes. The way I was dressed may have given people the impression I was up to no good. And no, I'm not a Pee Da File (PDF).
You could've told a female security guard/store worker to help the young girl because women cannot be pee da files.
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GuestFellow
12-17-2012, 11:03 PM
^ That is what I was going to do...confirm that she's lost and take her to a community officer.
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islamica
12-17-2012, 11:06 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Cabdullahi
because women cannot be pee da files.
That is a misconception some have. Women can be one as well, and there are plenty out there too. On the topic, there is nothing wrong in helping someone in need.
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Cabdullahi
12-17-2012, 11:07 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by GuestFellow
^ That is what I was going to do...confirm that she's lost and take her to a community officer.
No no no you don't do those kind of things, you cannot take a lost child by the hand and when folks stop you and grab your arm really tightly..you say..oh i'm just taking her to a community officer.
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Cabdullahi
12-17-2012, 11:09 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by islamica
That is a misconception have. Women can be one as well, and there are plenty out there too. On the topic, there is nothing wrong in helping someone in need.
okay okay maybe a woman can be a pee da file but only if her partner bullied her into doing it.
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GuestFellow
12-17-2012, 11:10 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Cabdullahi
No no no you don't do those kind of things, you cannot take a lost child by the hand and when folks stop you and grab your arm really tightly..you say..oh i'm just taking her to a community officer.
Let me make myself clear.

I wasn't going to grab her hand or her arm. I would have called a community officer...and told her to wait wherever she was.
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GuestFellow
12-17-2012, 11:11 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Cabdullahi
okay okay maybe a woman can be a pee da file but only if her partner bullied her into doing it.
Not really. My law tutor who was a family solicitor told the class that she had cases where mothers actually forced children to have sex with them. It happens...eww.

EDIT:

Back to the topic. I know what to do know. I will call a community officer if I spot a missing child. :) I won't even approach the child. That way I won't get into trouble.

Mods can close this topic if they want. I found what i was looking for. I was just worried I might get into trouble for helping.
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Perseveranze
12-17-2012, 11:15 PM
I don't see anything wrong with what you did.

The Prophet(صلي الله عليه و سلم) would pat random kids playing on the head.

Anas Ibn Maalik would pass by a group of young boys playing and he would extend to them a warm and gracious greeting (salaams). When he was asked, “Why do you do this”? He replied, ‘The Prophet ( صلي الله عليه و سلم ) use to do it’.

- [Bukhari/Muslim]


People nowadays have a negative culture to strangers approaching children and showing care. Which is a shame.
Reply

'Abd-al Latif
12-17-2012, 11:18 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by GuestFellow
:wa:

I was coming back from WORK. I usually go into town for a while. Most people think I'm a school student. XD I take off my tie and my shirt is not tucked in. o_o

I saw this ADORABLE little girl standing in the middle of the shopping mall. She must have been about 5 years old or even younger. She looked lost and was crying. To me no one was actually going to help her. I am NOT the type of person to interfere in these situations, but I was going to ask the little girl where her parents were.

Her dad spotted her. He was in some designer clothes shop. Anyway, I dashed off. People can get the wrong idea these days. I doubt anyone even noticed I was walking towards the girl.

Was I about to do something stupid?
You're too self-conscious. You need to have more confidence in yourself.

If you didn't do anything wrong, why are you assuming people will think of you as a bad man or something?
Reply

GuestFellow
12-17-2012, 11:22 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by 'Abd-al Latif
You're too self-conscious. You need to have more confidence in yourself.

If you didn't do anything wrong, why are you assuming people will think of you as a bad man or something?
:wa:

I'm Pakistani. As you know there have been stories about some Pakistani men grooming little girls in the UK. I just thought people might fit me into that profile. That is the first thing that came across my mind.
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Cabdullahi
12-17-2012, 11:23 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by GuestFellow
:wa:

I'm Pakistani. As you know there have been stories about some Pakistani men grooming little girls in the UK. I just thought people might fit me into that profile. That is the first thing that came across my mind.
oor batameez kya haal hey?
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جوري
12-17-2012, 11:26 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Perseveranze
I don't see anything wrong with what you did.

The Prophet(صلي الله عليه و سلم) would pat random kids playing on the head.

Anas Ibn Maalik would pass by a group of young boys playing and he would extend to them a warm and gracious greeting (salaams). When he was asked, “Why do you do this”? He replied, ‘The Prophet ( صلي الله عليه و سلم ) use to do it’.

- [Bukhari/Muslim]


People nowadays have a negative culture to strangers approaching children and showing care. Which is a shame.
You're talking about a community where contrary to popular beliefs everyone knew everyone. Nowadays 20 year old boys take out guns and wipe clean an entire classroom. Or they're having a bad day so they push someone down the train to their death, or kidnap girls for their husbands to have sex with. We have even cases of cannibalism and things that boggle the mind. This is the devil's century, he's everywhere doing his thing.

Imo I agree with Br. AbduAllah & Sr. islamica, firstly unless there's absolute immanent danger that's a child is being kidnapped before your eyes or drowning or chocking where you've no time to look for help but have to do it yourself otherwise, simply alert security and not to trust someone because of their gender, sickness spares no one, men, women, children and especially loathsome teenagers who happen to be my least favorite creatures on earth.

:w:
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sister herb
12-17-2012, 11:26 PM
Salam alaykum

You did only what every normal human being would did - go to ask what is wrong with this child.

I appreaciate people like you.
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'Abd-al Latif
12-17-2012, 11:29 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by GuestFellow
:wa:

I'm Pakistani. As you know there have been stories about some Pakistani men grooming little girls in the UK. I just thought people might fit me into that profile. That is the first thing that came across my mind.
So you're saying you're a child groomer?

I'm sorry for the bluntness but this mentality sounds to me as though you see yourself as guilty until proven innocent. You've done nothing wrong so you should not delve into such small and insignificant things.

You work, you seem to have a stable life and nothing seems to suggest that your image and reputation is hanging on a knife edge so you should not be so insecure about yourself.
Reply

GuestFellow
12-17-2012, 11:32 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by 'Abd-al Latif
So you're saying you're a child groomer?
No. I don't want people to think that. Some people might think I'm up to no good. I thought it might lead to a confrontation.
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Cabdullahi
12-17-2012, 11:34 PM
You did the right thing...dont worry
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sister herb
12-17-2012, 11:35 PM
Salam alaykum

Maybe it is different in others countries. In my country it is very normal if someone sees child crying alone in the street, is going to help or even asking if there is need to help.

^o)

I don´t know other countries but in here it might be even crime if you don´t try to help person who is in helpless situation, like a child.
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GuestFellow
12-17-2012, 11:45 PM
:wa:

I didn't even know it may be seen as necessary to help a child.

In the UK children are often told not to talk to strangers. If a complete stranger approaches a child not wearing a uniform, it may be seen as suspicious. Where I live there have been ethnic clashes between communities. It doesn't help there were cases of older men grooming young girls...
Reply

sister herb
12-18-2012, 12:13 AM
Salam alaykum

As I live different society... In here it would just shown you are caring person, when go to ask child if she needs help. I remember one case here when child was crying hysterically on the bus stop. When people went to ask what is wrong, they realised she had diabetes stroke, they ran to get her some chocolate, took her mobile, found number to hers mom and run her to get treatment.

Here too kids teach not to trust strangers but adults has to know when someone needs help.

You might not know but you was ready to help, if needed. That I respect.
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CosmicPathos
12-18-2012, 12:18 AM
i find it ironic that it is okay for a woman to hold a child up and be not labeled a pedophile, yet it is almost pedophilia if as a man you hold the stranger child up. Thanks to feminazi castration of society.

You dont have to look far. Its in the news. More women/mothers kill their babies than men/fathers.

To retain whatever is left of our bruised self-esteem, stop helping people! We all need to help ourselves firstly.
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ardianto
12-18-2012, 01:20 AM
The lost kid who I've helped last month is a boy, and he wasn't crying.

It's happened in parking area. So, I brought him to parking security guard, then we share duty. I searched the parent on the west side, the security guard searched the on east side, while that lost boy stayed with parking ticket officer. Alhamdulillah, we (in exactly, the security guard) found his mother.

Is unnecessary to help the lost kid?. Hmm, hmm, I lost in an exhibition event when I was 4.
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Cabdullahi
12-18-2012, 01:27 AM
I left my house when i was 7 years old and i walked a couple of miles through a city similar to new york and then came back home at night..to find my mum crying.

Nobody protected us except Allah
Reply

glo
12-18-2012, 07:34 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Cabdullahi
women cannot be pee da files.
They can't??
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8022861.stm
http://www.child-safety-for-parents....l#.UNAaT9Q-d3E

GuestFellow, I think your intentions were really good. But it is true that we should approach any children with care. As a woman I would do the same.
Finding a security person would be useful.
But if there isn't one around, I would at least feel inclined to keep an eye on the child, to make sure that a parent comes back for her.
If you feel you have to approach her, keep your distance. Speak to her, but don't make physical contact. Involve other people, so your intentions are clear (for example, ask walkers-by if they know who the child is).
And keep looking out for a parent or a security person, who can take over from you.

Although it may be an uncomfortable situation, I don't think leaving a vulnerable 5-year-old on her own is an option ... You still have a responsibility of care.
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Dagless
12-18-2012, 09:42 AM



format_quote Originally Posted by GuestFellow
I will call a community officer
Reply

Haya emaan
12-18-2012, 07:10 PM
where is this world going? or have i spent all my life out side this world..
i never thought helping a little child can be a crime or suspicious
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Jedi_Mindset
12-18-2012, 07:35 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by GuestFellow
No. I don't want people to think that. Some people might think I'm up to no good. I thought it might lead to a confrontation.
Bro thats what your nafs want to make you think, preventing you from doing good deeds. Only you and Allah knows your intention. Dont think too much about people around you. Or whatever they think or say, there is no reason to be worried about that, as long you do things which please Allah.

Even if you had to wear 2 buckets of alcohol in public (not planning to drink it), in a area where alot of muslims are lliving.
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Imaan
12-20-2012, 02:39 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by GuestFellow
:wa:

I was coming back from WORK. I usually go into town for a while. Most people think I'm a school student. XD I take off my tie and my shirt is not tucked in. o_o

I saw this ADORABLE little girl standing in the middle of the shopping mall. She must have been about 5 years old or even younger. She looked lost and was crying. To me no one was actually going to help her. I am NOT the type of person to interfere in these situations, but I was going to ask the little girl where her parents were.

Her dad spotted her. He was in some designer clothes shop. Anyway, I dashed off. People can get the wrong idea these days. I doubt anyone even noticed I was walking towards the girl.

Was I about to do something stupid?
What's the big deal I don't seem to get it :O ? What's there in helping a child lost or not lost, its regarded as kind here in my country :hmm: ! U'd always see men here helping kids and ladies, even if they professors LOL! I always gethe ones asking, mate must I carry ur packets ;D, it look a bit difficult 4 u with ur abaya n khimaar and I'm like no thanks my bro is there, just waiting 4 him :hiding: . Or am I missing some point here in ur story?
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QueenofHerts
12-22-2012, 11:03 PM
I had a similar experience, this child was crying but I wasnt sure if his mum was nearby but not paying attention or he was actually lost. So many people were nearby but not doing anything. Finally some older woman said are you lost and he cried 'yes'.

Just goes to show, people are too afraid to do anything.
Reply

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