Advice needed

[rachelabs75]

Im so confused. 1 half years ago I met a Muslim man and he completely changed my life. Im not going to go into detail but my life could not have been much worse. He made me feel worth something he made me feel like a person not just a thing. I started to ask him questions about Islam and because he had gone to university for 6 years to study Islam and was now working in a mosque my questions where answered he knew what he was talking about. He gave me books to read and they all inspired and made sense to me so I reverted. Time went by and he kept on saying he wanted to marry me and wanted children. We both knew that by seeing each other was forbidden. He kept on saying his family would not agree to it and he would probably end up having to leave his Job as his reputation in his community would be ruined. He said he would sort something out as soon as he could.
4 months later I find out am pregnant. I put huge pressure on him to tell his family. One day he came to my house in tears telling me that he had something to tell me. He was already married with 2 children. I was devistated. He told me that he loved me and did not want to leave me. In the same breath he said he did not want to leave his wife and children.
Im now 5 months pregnant and suprisingly I am ok with him having a wife. He splits his time equally between us. The country I live in does not allow you to have 2 wifes.
I cant cope with knowing that me and my child are "wrong" yet im helpless to make it right. I used to love learning about Islam but now everytime I start to read I end up being in tears. How can I ask for forgiveness when I continue to sin? How can I leave him when it was him who stopped me living a life of sin. I know what a good dad he will be. He is an amazing man I know he loves me.
I have made phonecalls to mosques asking for advice they tell me they will get an someone qualifed to call me back yet I never recieve the call. Is there anyone who can offer any advice.

[Alpha Dude]

Sister, that's sad to read of your predicament.

Can I ask if you got married to this man, even if it was in secret?

[Dagless]

How can I leave him when it was him who stopped me living a life of sin.

He helped you with the info, but it was Allah who guided you to the truth and saved you.

I know what a good dad he will be. He is an amazing man I know he loves me.

You are seeing him through the lens of love. Objectively I don't think an amazing man would do what he did to you.

I really feel for your struggle and hope you sort it out soon. If he won't marry you please try your best not to go on with the sinful relationship; it will only hurt you and your child more in the long run.

[rachelabs75]

No yet he told his family we did. We tried to get married but nobody was prepared to be witnesses.

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[rachelabs75]

You are seeing him through the lens of love. Objectively I don't think an amazing man would do what he did to you.

I really feel for your struggle and hope you sort it out soon. If he won't marry you please try your best not to go on with the sinful relationship; it will only hurt you and your child more in the long run.

I knew in my heart this would be the advice that would be given, however I dont know any other muslims other than him. I have tried to find some sort of group for sisters in my area. Im completely on my own Im scared that I wont be able to bring my child up on my own with the limited knowledge I have. I dont want to fail my child.

[Marina-Aisha]

Where do u live sister?

[rachelabs75]

Where do u live sister?

West yorkshire UK - If anybody has any ideas where I can find some support from sisters so I can learn more about Islam. I have been downloading books however sometimes you need acually human contact !!

[Cabdullahi]

I think marina lives in Yorkshire, but be careful of who you meet.

[Re.TiReD]

I don't want to fail my child.

Assalamu 'alaykum

You're not going to fail your child insha'Allah, I'm sure you're going to be a fantastic mum.

Here are several links that may help you:

http://www.solaceuk.org/

And according to my book of faces:

http://www.facebook.com/groups/45366...group_activity

I've asked a few sisters who live in that area if they know of any support groups for sisters/reverts.

You'll be in my du'aas.

Wassalam

[rachelabs75]

I've asked a few sisters who live in that area if they know of any support groups for sisters/reverts.

You'll be in my du'aas.

Wassalam

Thank you for the information and your kind words sister. Inshallah I will find the strength to do whats right for both myself and my child.

[Re.TiReD]

From my facebook:

http://www.facebook.com/groups/leedsmuslimwomensgroup/

^^ and the sister said: No probs, she can ask any questions she may have up there, we sisters will try to help her inshaAllah

http://www.facebook.com/leedsnewmuslims?ref=ts&fref=ts

http://www.facebook.com/LeedsGrandMosque?ref=ts&fref=ts

Another sister said: Leeds Grand mosque has alot of activities for sisters/reverts also check their fb page more local for the sister if she lives in Leeds. Also there is Islam Leeds and talks held by sisters I could link her up with if she wishes.

And another sister: Yes sister we have a group set up in dewsbury called Dewsbury New Muslims
We have a back to basics class for sisters once a week.. Also have some one to one classes which can be arranged for sisters who cant make it to the classes.

And these are just some of the comments from sisters. I don't know any of the people on my fb personally because it's my business account but if you have fb please let me know I can get you in touch with these sisters, or even if you don't it's fine. Whatever happens with regards to your situation, know that you have a lot of support available.

All the best sis

Wassalam

[rachelabs75]

And these are just some of the comments from sisters. I don't know any of the people on my fb personally because it's my business account but if you have fb please let me know I can get you in touch with these sisters, or even if you don't it's fine. Whatever happens with regards to your situation, know that you have a lot of support available.

I would really appreciate your help. I have fb dont use it much though how do I send you my account privately though (im a newbie with computers too lol).