Before marriage, I didn't really have a strong opinion about it. I did, however, have my own insecurities sometimes because it was difficult for me to imagine someone who would truly accept me for everything that I am forever and ever without getting bored or disinterested. It still didn't sway me away from the idea of marriage because that thought was only due to ignorance and inexperience.
I was often indecisive about marriage because I could see myself living happily whether married or not. I did add a little burden upon myself by thinking I had to finish school before marriage and become successful etc. because I'm very independent when it comes down to accomplishing my own personal goals, but the reality is, if you get married to someone who is supportive, then you don't need to feel like you have to accomplish everything on your own. I also had people telling me that if one day I got divorced, at least I would have built a life for myself as back-up (I think most muslim girls are taught this now a days), but alhemdulilah I realized that if you're preparing yourself for a divorce, then you are not really preparing yourself for a marriage. Women are already bringing negative thoughts/vibes into a marriage when they think they have to be successful for the sole purpose of fearing that their marriage will not work.
Originally Posted by anonymous
I can honestly say alhemdulilah that my husband has never made me feel jealous or looked at any other women whether I'm with him or not (at least from what I know :D). Just his manners mashallah are better than I have seen from most men. I can't say this for all men, of course, but marry someone who is God-fearing and who truly respects you before marriage and observes his islamic etiquette and manners all the time.
I don't think you should worry about marriage. It's a scary thought for some because it's life altering, but it can be an amazing life alteration if you think with your head and your iman. Also, make du'a..even if you're not married right now and don't know when you'll be getting married or if you'll be getting married, just make du'a that if Allah opens the doors of marriage to you, He will grant you someone who is good for you and kind to you. Sometimes the best times to ask Allah for something is when you don't really need
to ask Him for it, if you understand what I mean.
fi aman Allah