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Indian Bro
01-23-2013, 01:43 AM
As-salamu alaykum,

I've been trying to make a conscious effort to stop swearing when I'm with my friends, however I'm finding it really difficult. I don't swear when I'm with my family except my older brother (we're really frank with each other). Although I can say I've reduced considerably, I cannot say that I've stopped. I only use these words unknowingly, I don't give much thought before I say them. Example, yesterday during class I realized something was wrong with my presentation and as soon as I realized the error I snapped "Oh s***!" Although it wasn't loud. Other times I swear are like when I'm talking to my friends and I really want to emphasize on something, I know people are going to point fingers at my vocabulary here and say "Try to improve your vocabulary" but it's become a serious habit, I mean, like I said, I don't give much thought before I say it because when I'm with my friends and I'm trying to stress or emphasize on a point I feel it's much easier if I swear, LOL! "That assignment was so ******* hard!"

I think I know the solution but I don't know if it will work for sure. Since I'm almost done with college and my college friends are usually the only ones I swear with (exception of my brother) then perhaps after I finish college things will be a lot easier. Then I'll just need to focus on having vulgar-free conversations with my brother. However, I don't want to wait till college gets over, I want to start now. Any advise would be highly appreciated.

Salam 3laikum
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Innocent Soul
01-23-2013, 12:05 PM
^ First you should make your intention why you are trying to stop yourself from doing this. Determination is very important. It's really good that you are trying to control your tongue and its really very important

Every time you say a vulgar word give yourself a punishment. Example: You have to say 100 times astaghfirullah etc . You can count the number of times you said a bad word and write it on a page and see how much you are improving. After improving alot you can also reward yourself with something good to eat and 2 rakah nafl for thanking Allah. You can also try to replace these words with something nice or just try to think before you speak anything even when you are with your friends.

Narrated Sahl bin Sa'd (RA):The Prophet (SAW) said,

"Whoever guarantees me(the chastity of) what is between his legs (i.e. his private parts), and what is between his jaws (i.e., his tongue), I guarantee him Paradise."

Bukhari Vol. 8 : No. 799
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ardianto
01-23-2013, 02:33 PM
Wa'alaikum salam

format_quote Originally Posted by Indian Bro
Example, yesterday during class I realized something was wrong with my presentation and as soon as I realized the error I snapped "Oh s***!" .... I feel it's much easier if I swear, LOL! "That assignment was so ******* hard!"
Seem like you said "Oh s**t" and ""That assignment was so f*****g hard!".

You swear in these English words?. If yes, you should stop watching Hollywood movies.

Here what I've written in another thread.

In the past I was affected by Hollywood movies. So, when I got shocked, instead of said "Astaghfirullah Hal Adzim", I said "Ooohh! Sh*t!".

But then I tried to clean up my mind from rude words and accustom myself to say Islamic word such as "Subhan Allah", "Allahu Akbar".

Okay bro, train yourself to say Islamic words. When you see or hear something that impress you, say "Subhan Allah", when you see or hear something that makes you happy, say "Alhamdulillah", when you see or hear something wrong, say "Astaghfirullah Hal Adzim". Insha Allah, it will clean up your mind from inappropriate words and train your reflex to say "Astaghfirullah Hal Adzim" when you get shocked.
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Indian Bro
01-23-2013, 03:58 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by ardianto
Wa'alaikum salam


Seem like you said "Oh s**t" and ""That assignment was so f*****g hard!".

You swear in these English words?. If yes, you should stop watching Hollywood movies.

Here what I've written in another thread.
As-salamu alaykum

I don't watch Hollywood movies anymore... Nor do I watch any TV shows... I think the problem lies with my childhood because I was exposed to these words at a very young age, before I even attained maturity. And I do a lot of dhikr especially during times that I would normally before be singing songs in my head. I guess, like you said, I'll make a conscious effort of saying "Asstaghfirallah" whenever I react to something that disturbs me.

Thanks for the advice guys, jazakAllah khairan to both posters above!

Salam 3laikum
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Muhaba
01-23-2013, 04:11 PM
I remember one African American sister who said she made her children wash their mouths with soap everytime they swore. You might want to try the same - but do use non-toxic soap.
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IslamicRevival
01-23-2013, 05:27 PM
Make a habit of reciting Astaghfirullah and you will find much benefit in it Inshaa Allah, It will help you in many ways as its a shield against evil thoughts. May Allah Subhana Wa Ta'ala protect us from the whispers of Shaytan, Ameen
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