Can you pray away "retardation"??

[anonymous]

I feel so depressed. I was born with "issues" and part of it is being mildly retarded. I have no friends because I am very socially awkward and say or ask stupid/inappropriate things.

I feel so sad about it but at the same time I'm thankful I am nowhere near what some people go through like not being able to walk, talk, not even being able to be aware of themselves and their surroundings..like people in group homes who are mentally disabled and have to be herded around like cattle.


Thankful I am nowhere near that but I just feel worthless.. I have severe sleep apnea which I am sure makes things worse( I do not use the sleep machine), my mind is in a fog and feels like burnt mush.

Not only do I not use the sleep machine I feel it's hard to force myself to do daily things that EVERYONE does...brushing teeth, shower..etc. My room is a mess because I do not know where to put stuff, what to throw..etc.
All of this is part of my condition,you can research it...charge syndrome. Thankful, unlike MOST people with charge syndrome I do not have any problems with gross motor skills. I have graduated from college, and was in advanced classes in high school, so I am not a hermit who cannot do anything..

[anonymous]

Thanks for accepting the post

[May Ayob]

Hi my friend :)

I'm sorry about what you're going through, I would love to be your friend. I am socially awkward too I think there are also many people who are like us I think it may have to do with being naturally shy. I had trouble making friends too and even right now at uni, I guess I am considered too boring to be around because I dont burst out laughing at every small joke someone cracks. I understand that it makes you a bit self concious and sometimes you might worry about not saying some 'stupid' things, but no one is perfect; no one believe me. Even the smartest people in this world blabber useless and frankly sometimes non sensical things, so who cares whether you said something you regretted later. Really, we all do that some of us just dont want to admit it. I am concerned about your self esteem. You know... everyone has something about them that they should value. I cant emphasize greatly enough on the fact that you're one unique person that has no other like of, so have hope and always try to shun down the negative thoughts with brighter and more positive thoughts like if you're mind is telling you that your happiness is restricted because you feel like youre facing a mental 'disability' then you can watch some very nice and inspiring videos about remarkable people who have it really hard but all those nasty days and terrible circumstances all that wasnt enough to wipe out the smile from their beautiful faces. Don't let life's problems or things that are out of your hand have the biggest inluence on your life, you can defeat those things and you can still God willing have a happy life without them getting in the way. Also I have a tip that maybe helpful; for all the things that you feel are symptomsor side downs of your condition how about changing that perception because now when you think about it in a way that's entirely linked to your condition you think it's inherent and it would be difficult for you to change them beause everytime you'll try you will feel defated because you priorly think it's mainly inherent of the condition; think about your sleeping habits, blurry mind and messy room as habits you've developed over time regardless of your condition this way you'll be more motivated to change them by taking small steps like if you sleep in too much , may be it's because you stay up late and then you restore that lack of sleep by sleeping more at day time, or maybe there's an unbalance in your thyroid gland. Also, you can have small nap during the day time and it's good if you start using your alarm but start gradually like if you just decide to set it on 5 am tommorow maybe it will work for the first time but then later it wont work and you'll be back in square one, so start from an hour or two earlier from your usuall waking up time for two to three week and when you feel ready you can adjust that. And please don't compare yourself with other people; many times the people who appear to have the full package are not always happy or lead a perfect and positive life it's all too delusional to think that and most importantly believe in your self; you are good and beautiful just as you are you don't need to be like this or that to be more worthy; something about us people is that we are our harshest judges and we often don't see the wonderfull things in our selves that people see in us. I believ that this is just a foggy phase that you're going through we all have days when we feel completely worthless and useless and question our own existence in this world, it's a part of life but days get better God willing. Also, this is a very suitable time to become close to God whenever you feel lonely and down pray to Him and talk to Him, join charity oragnizations in your free time and go out more to new places it might be adventerous and your social anxiety might draw you back but believe these are just fears that limit your freedom there's many beautiful and interesting things to explore about your self and life in this world, so don't let it pull you back. Also don't neglect taking care of your self sometimes a shower or bath can boost up your good mood and make you more calm. Hold on and hang in there always remeber that Allah only inflicts hardships on those whom He loves and wants good for and remeber that a believers state is always good because is a harm inflicts he/she is patient and that is good for him/her and if a blessing is granted they are thankfull for it; and it is all good for the believer. May Allah give you strength,wisdom, peace and tranquility.

[Alpha Dude]

There are certain things which we are born with that cannot be changed. A person who is blind, for example or someone horribly disfigured, etc. These things most likely cannot be changed and remain there as a test for us.

However, Allah knows best. Always be optimistic and make plenty of dua for help and cure, regardless of the odds (whilst remaining patient).

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[Abdul Fattah]

Aselam aleykum
Well there's always the chance of a miracle, God can do everything he wants. But maybe Allah prefers this path for you? It might sound harsh, but remember that each path comes with its own problems. And you might envy others at some times, but who knows how miserable they are deep down inside?
We are all tested in our own way. I know that probably doesn't help you allot. I know it can seem hopeless, I've been there. I have autism. Off course that's totally diffrent, but still, I can defenitly relate to the social akwardness and such. But don't give up hope, these are things you can overcome! I mean, you can grow. You can learn why certain reactions are akward. Sure your condition will most likely make things challenging for the rest of your life, but over time you can learn new things and improve your quality of life. There are many qualities beside being smart. I'm sure that you have plenty of other abilities that make you a lovable person. You can have a meaningfull life, just ignore those who don't accept you for who you are. And perhaps the most important part, is that you have to accept who you are yourself!
May Allah Subhana wa ta'ala help you trough this, and guide you and protect you.

[anonymous]

Thanks all.

[Muhaba]

not everybody is the same. some ppl are gifted in art while others don't have those skills but they aren't called retards. lots of ppl are shy and awkward in social situations while others are outgoing. that doesn't mean that the shy ones have a problem.

the answer to shyness isn't avoidance but putting yourself in situations where you meet and talk to ppl. at first you'll mess up but eventually you'll get used to it and will no longer feel self-conscious in social situations.
some of the most gifted ppl are naturally shy and introverted!

the fact that you don't take interest in doing normal everyday things is because of lack of friends that has made you sad. the best thing to do is to go out and meet ppl, perhaps at the local islamic center. if you have a friend or relative who's aware of your condition, you can take them along and they can "save you" from awkward situations such as replying on your behalf if you get stuck and don't know what to say. you'll need to practice quiet a bit to get used to social situations, so don't be discouraged too soon.

Now to answer your question whether there are duas you can recited. here are a few things you can do:
1. Salat-i-Hajah - prayer asking a specific dua. you'll pray two rakahs nafl as usual and then aftr you finish the prayer, read the special dua after zikr. it is found in lots of adkar books.

2. read Surah Al-Fatiha over yourself as it has shifa (cure).

3. read the dua of Prophet Musa (AS) :
And untie the knot from my tongue
That they may understand my speech.
(20:27-28)