Hello, My name is Essa (non-believers call me Carlos)...

[JC2NY]

Salaam Alakium,

My name is Essa and I'm from New York. Hamduallah, I've been a Muslim for almost 7 years and I am here, like other brothers or sisters, for advice, mainly, for me, about dealing with trouble contacting and being a father (though) from far away to my son, who lives in London.

To make it brief (Allah knows I'll try), I was married before (Islamic) and, Hamduallah, Allah granted us a beautiful boy. After not working out (it ended some time ago, but the divorce was finalized last year), I granted his mother a divorce, with clauses that involve contacting my son. Also, she has a "partner" who likes to preach Islam but is a hypocrite by threatening me, by speaking horrible things about me to my son, and does contribute because he is content on just doing nothing. With the resources I have, I have done all I can and can only enforce the divorce contract in very little ways. She (his mother) has even threatened to not let me see my son when I visit him in May.

I have been patient, I have been the "better person" after taunts, lies, and heartache and all I can think of is hurting this brother, physically, after saying nasty things like my son is going to spit on my grave when I perish or that if my son visited me in the States, they (his mother and her "partner") will not let him come back.

All I'm down to is depending on British courts, maybe approach her "partner", or just keep going through heartache which deters, at times, from what I have to do. The few brothers, in London, I still keep in contact with usually tell me that if I do something, I will be kept apart more from my son. No, they are not willing to mediate in fear that they may get angered by her "partner" (or really, they just don't want to get involved).

I'm sorry if this isn't the place to say this.

I know the deal with Islam. I would not put my son or my deen ahead of Allah, but I will NOT let go of my boy, like my father did. I will NOT consider letting him live is life thinking that his father doesn't/didn't care about him.

Salaam Alakium,

Essa

[Muslim Woman]

:wa:


br , Welcome here.

May Allah grants what is best for u .