Being "too nice"

[anonymous]

I want to be seen as a good and nice person for the sake of Allah. I feel though that people are taking advantage of my qualities and I dont know how to respond to that due to ignorance of what Islam says about this. What should I do?

It is hard to say no sometimes and you have a feeling that people only befriend you because you are successful and want things from you.

[Ali_008]

:sl:

Don't go out of your way to help people. If they ask for help, and you can give it to them without putting yourself in any trouble then do it, otherwise just smile and say no. If they think you're kind, they should take even a refusal from you as something positive.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

you dont need to go beyond your limits

do as much as you can within the biundaries of islaam


i have said no many times and i always give a valid reason so no worries

[crimsontide06]

Be nice and kind but be smart too.

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[anonymous]

:sl:

Thanks brothers.

Is it okay to say "no" too often, even to family members(without my mum and dad of course)?

Its hard to set limits between being kind and being TOO nice.

I am pretty smart and can detect when someone is trying to use me, but it can be a family member, relatives etc.

I will begin to say no from now on and only help if I actually can do it.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

i dont get it lol

you do what you can. a muslim shukdnt let himslf get taken advantage of anyway

for example my family will always ask me if im free before even asking me ti do something. its just the polite thing to do. uf im not free im not free. if i am free i never say no as long as they arent asking me ti do something i find objectionable

[Periwinkle18]

Don't burden ur self too much you'll end up getting sick like me. I'm crazy I just love helping. buh I've also learnt how to say no as it was gng out ta my hands ppl took advantage kept saying things. Trust me you'll get sick if u over burden urself by helping ppl, ppl will think its easy for u n they'll keep asking u things. Just tell them politely that ur busy or u have other work.They won't know unless you tell them.

There should be a balance :)

I'm not saying u start saying no to everyone just look at urself if u have the energy to do it then go for it if not then don't commit.