Can I still post on IslamicBoard?

[hisnameiszzz]

Salaams all.

I've been having a lot of issues lately and I feel that my faith is going, almost gone.

If my faith completely disappears, am I still OK to use these boards or do I have to be a practising Muslim to use it? If I can't carry on using it, that's fine. I would just like to say a huge thanks to all the lovely people that have taken time out to reply to my posts especially in Ramadhan, when you would have been very busy going about your daily lives. I've had a lot of clarification on some issues (Jewish Converts / Nasty Smells In Masjids / Noisy Neighbours and best of all Israeli Products To Boycott etc). Normally, I would go to an Imam/Mufti, but they are always so busy and cannot make time so I have had to resort to other means.

Jazakallah all, and thank you once again for all your help and time.

[Hulk]

Wa alaykumsalam wrwb,

I think everyone is welcome as long as they do not break the rules of the forum. We're all normal folks just like you brother.

[greenhill]

Salaams.

As long as you are here, we can communicate. It is your choice. You leave, it ends.

You are just being tested. As we all are. None of us in this forum is without issues, serious ones at that. It is how we deal with them. First if we are feeling the pain for the whole world, and feel powerless as a result, we will end up feeling a defeatist, frustrated, angry and give up. In matters that we have no control over, invest 'less' emotion. Only in matter that we have physical capabilities to effect the outcome do we invest more. Many 'outside' interferences, if allowed to distract you from liking what you know is nothing but the truth, then you have real issues.

I turn it around now. I do like going to the mosque. I have found myself wondering why is it that I tend to always get these distracting people next to me. Those who recite loudly that I often have to repeat my surah again and sometimes again because he is reading pretty loudly. Or smell. The more it became a precondition to my expectations of going to the mosque, it always became the test. What I tried to avoid, is a sure bet to having it thrown in your face anyway. Do I get angry? At times I do, but I try to take it as a test. May Allah be pleased with my sincere efforts. He only knows what extreme thoughts go through my head, and this is me praying in a mosque.. masyaAllah.

I don't know what the percentages of people who leave their faith purely on reflection of what other people did, not because of the flaws in the faith itself. The faith is about putting no other deity with Him. And do good to mankind encapsulated by wishing for your neighbours what you would wish for yourself. All will be fine between you and Allah.

When you die, in the grave you will by the leave of God, safe and on judgement day, you'll be alright too!

Don't lose faith and don't give up on us here.


:peace:

Thought I'd add... perhaps change your name brother to something else than ....zzz as that signifies sleep.... maybe something to mean awake? alert? :embarrass:hiding:

[Muhammad]

:wasalamex

The thing that confused me brother, was that from your posts, you are someone who prays, fasts, gives zakah, has concern about the sanctity of the Masjid and so on... all these things demonstrate faith. How then can you so easily let that faith slip away completely? That is a huge jump all the way down to zero. Surely these actions must represent something in your heart... a love for Allaah :swt: and acknowledgement of the truth of Islam. And we all know that simply being a Muslim doesn't mean a life full of ease... the examples of the Prophets have been cited for you already. They waited years on end for their du'as to be answered, and Allaah :swt: knows best how to respond to a person's du'a. In the story of Musa and Khidr we learn how easy it is to assume something is good or bad, yet the reality of it is totally different. Truly, of knowlege, mankind is given only a little.

Don't wait for your faith to 'disappear', rather fight such thoughts from the shaytan. Don't close all the doors between you and Allaah :swt:. Do something to rekindle the desire to come closer to Him, no matter how small. And Allaah :swt: will make it easier for you :ia:.

The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said, “Allah the Most High said, ‘I am as My servant thinks (expects) I am. I am with him when he mentions Me. If he mentions Me to himself, I mention him to Myself; and if he mentions Me in an assembly, I mention him in an assembly greater than it. If he draws near to Me a hand’s length, I draw near to him an arm’s length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.’”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 7405; Muslim, 2675

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[Berries'forest]

:sl:
I am going through the same thing right now, there is a phase I went through where I completely abandoned my prayers. I am doing my best to get back on track. Do you read the Quran, because if you don't it makes it easier for shaytan to influence your thoughts. Also keep making dua for yourself and for all our brothers and sisters who are being tested in this life. We lost over 600 Muslims souls in the short of a week. It is truly a tragedy. I think life can never be easy, there's always some days when you feel really depressed and in despair but having hope in Allah is very important. What you're going through is normal though, faith rises and falls periodically, you just need to keep hanging in there. Here's a video I hope you'll watch and it will make you feel better hopefully:

Weakness of Emaan (Faith) & its Cures - Yusha Evens - YouTube

You can also watch some excellent videos here that tackle a lot of the issues you raise:

TheDeenShowTV - YouTube

[Muhammad]

:wasalamex

May Allaah :swt: guide and strengthen you both and keep you steadfast, Aameen.

Here's a short video which is part of a series this Ramadhan (I've only seen a couple or so). The series is about 40 Hadith on the virtues & rulings on the Noble Qur'an. This one was called Are you feeling sad? Not sure if it's entirely relevant to this thread but it may be of benefit - it mentions a particular du'a.

[hisnameiszzz]

Salaams all.

Jazakallah for your responses. They are much appreciated.

HULK - Thanks for letting me know about the rules.

GREENHILL - I have no issues with going to the Masjid and standing next to smelly people - that was just an insignificant rant. I had someone next to me in Taraweeh last night who smelt like he had not bathed for twenty years but I was OK with that. It made no difference to me as I put Itar on my nose and I had sprayed lots of fragrance on both my shoulders so when I did the salaam at the end of each set of prayers, I only smelt myself. And I don't go to the Masjid very early now so the regulars can sit and talk about Indian movie stars and their wives to their hearts content. As long as I am not getting free sins, I don't really care.

My only bug is with the neighbours which I will talk more about in a bit.

Also, thank you for making me feel so welcome. I know I am new, I know I have opened up a few crazy threads - I would not be surprised if some of you thought I just came on here to bash Islam.

MUHAMMAD - If my Mom knew I was posting things about losing my faith online, she would no doubt get a baseball bat and smack me a few. I come from a very noble Muslim family and my Nana (Mom's Dad) was one of the first Aalims to come to England from India in the 50's. I'm very proud to say he was the person that was involved in inventing the salaah timetable in the UK and also helped with the erection of one of the first Masjids in the UK too! Woohoo. So yeah, saying I am about to lose my faith etc does make me feel very ashamed of myself, but like I said in my first post on this website, I was going to be honest and that is genuinely how I feel.

Also, thanks for the video you have linked which I will look at again later.

BERRIES'FOREST - How are you coping? How do you get back on track? I am a Hafez so I pray the Qura'an on a daily basis. When I am on way to work, I will pray Yaseen / Kahf / Mulk and various others and I do this on a daily basis. I've never abandoned my prayers / Islam before. It's normally a thought which goes on in my mind but then I forget about it. However this Ramadhan, the neighbours have just driven me to the point of no return.

We just can't reason with them. If they were Christian/Jewish/Hindu/any other religion, I would fully understand why their lives are so full of joy and content as they are NON MUSLIMS and this world is meant to be paradise for them. However animal like the neighbours are, they do come to Jummah every Firday, the old man does pray Qura'an in Ramadhan (prays so loudly and incorrectly, it's enough to make you want to smack your head against the wall), and they do come to the Masjid in Ramadhan too, so they are NOT non Muslims.

I have explained my predicament in http://www.islamicboard.com/advice-a...-accepted.html in full detail and have included details of what they do / are like. I don't want to go on about it as it would be classed as backbiting, but I mentioned it so you guys know what they are like.

My issue and what I can't get my head around, leading me to ditching Islam is why Allah would listen to their duas and give them happiness and make our lives hell? Have I missed something completely? It's Allah's hikmat to do what he wants, but I am just wondering whether I am supposed to do the opposite of what Islam says (like the neighbours) to get my duas accepted. That's where my issue is.

Now don't get me wrong, I don't expect to go to the Masjid and pray Qura'an and think Allah will accept all my duas. I don't expect to click my fingers and expect things to happen just like that, it's not how life is. I fully get that.

I fully get what you guys say about Prophets and Sahabas, and the trials and tribulations they went through, but you have to understand I am just a mortal. I am not a Prophet or a Sahaba, so to expect me to wait for 20 years is a bit too much. I think waiting 7 years is more than enough to be honest. Besides, it was a Muslim vs a Non Muslim in those stories, i.e. Hadhrat Bilal vs Christians, the Prophet vs Jews etc. In my case, it's a practising Muslim vs a non practising Muslim.

The neighbours are the issue which is driving me to breaking point. I have loads of other issues in my life - crazy family, big brother (he is an Aalim) comes to bully us daily - he wants us to vacate the house so we can sell it (it won't sell because people know who lives next door so why he thinks it will sell is beyond me!), awful job, bullied at work for being a Muslim, health issues, Mom's health issues. All that is fine, I can deal with it. It's just the neighbours are driving me mad. As I have explained, I have tried getting in touch with various Aalims and Muftis asking for help, but again, what they have asked me to do is not working or they simply just don't have time to help.

I know I am not perfect and I have done many things wrong in my life, but I have repented and made amends. For example, I had a skincare eBay business and was selling a lot of products from companies that supported Israel in it's campaign against Palestine. I found out recently, so I have stopped stocking those items and I went to the local Muslim charity shop and donated £500 out of my profits. I used to have something to say about everything even if it did not involve me, and I have now changed by keeping my mouth shut and only talking if it is of importance to me or I have something genuine to add.

Anyway, I am going on and on and I seem to have lost the plot. Allah listened to Iblees's dua to give him eternal life and that was accepted, so if my dua's don't get accepted, that must make me worse than him, so for me to follow Islam would be completely pointless. I know I am not a bad person. If any of you asked anyone who knew me, they would confirm this. I cause no one any trouble (well some slugs got salt on them the other day as there were too many in my yard and I could not get past them to go the Masjid and I am petrified of slugs), I am a quiet person, I don't *****, I don't backbite, I mind my own business, I don't cause the neighbours any trouble.

Part of me was hoping one of you would have a special dua that I could pray so the animal like neighbours would understand that closing a door gently would mean it still shuts and there was no need to hammer it shut at full force repeatedly throughout the day, and all would be good, but it looks like that's not going to happen.

Thank you for letting me post on this website though. I know my Islam is not just going to disappear like that. I was trying to train myself the other day, but I kept praying Bismillah before I did anything even though I was trying to force myself not to. And I am still praying the Qura'an and going to the Masjid too. I'm not a very ex Muslim am I! Doh! Almost time for Asar, so I must go and get changed.

Thanks for listening.

[Hulk]

Wa alaykumsalam wrwb

Mmm I am a bit confused as to your reason for losing faith being because you feel your dua never gets answered. Would you cease to believe that your father is your father if he doesn't buy you anything you ask for? Does sound not exist because a deaf person has never experienced hearing?

Whether we get what we want or not does not negate the truth of reality.

Allah listened to Iblees's dua to give him eternal life and that was accepted, so if my dua's don't get accepted, that must make me worse than him, so for me to follow Islam would be completely pointless.

Not really, there could be many reasons as to why one's duas are not granted, it doesn't necessarily mean that they are worse than Iblis.

[Scimitar]

being a Muslim, is not easy in the modern age bro hisnameizz,

you should know one thing though - faith goes up and down, for everyone. The heart is prone to shifting now and then - the idea is to keep patient in the times of hardship - and for some, the levels they can bare is low, so they don't get tested much - for others, they have amazing amounts of personal tolerances, and so they get tested way more than the others...

...we should never compare ourselves to another person, because we all have our own individual traits.

your faith may be low now, but something could happen and turn it all around in a matter of minutes.

I highly doubt that reciting Quran will make you a better Muslim bro - being a better Muslim involves more walking, and less talking.

You ever read about Imam al Ghazali? I think you would draw a parallel to him in some ways, read about him, his biography is something I feel you can benefit from in sha Allah. Who knows, the answers you seek, may be in there somewhere.

Scimi

[Muhammad]

:wasalamex

We just can't reason with them. If they were Christian/Jewish/Hindu/any other religion, I would fully understand why their lives are so full of joy and content as they are NON MUSLIMS and this world is meant to be paradise for them. However animal like the neighbours are, they do come to Jummah every Firday, the old man does pray Qura'an in Ramadhan (prays so loudly and incorrectly, it's enough to make you want to smack your head against the wall), and they do come to the Masjid in Ramadhan too, so they are NOT non Muslims.

Things are not so black and white. All non-Muslims do not lead lives of bliss and contentment. How many of them have fame and wealth and whatever they desire, yet fall into depression, drug abuse, crime, commit suicide...? On the other hand, Allaah :swt: does reward Muslims in this life too...

Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer - We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do. [An-Nahl: 97]

You will also be familiar with the verses reminding us that in Allaah's remembrance do hearts find rest (13:28) and that turning away from Allaah's remembrance leads one to have a depressed life (20:124).

Also, how do you know your neighbours' lives are full of joy and contentment? They may well have many trials of their own which are unknown to you.

I fully get what you guys say about Prophets and Sahabas, and the trials and tribulations they went through, but you have to understand I am just a mortal. I am not a Prophet or a Sahaba, so to expect me to wait for 20 years is a bit too much. I think waiting 7 years is more than enough to be honest. Besides, it was a Muslim vs a Non Muslim in those stories, i.e. Hadhrat Bilal vs Christians, the Prophet vs Jews etc. In my case, it's a practising Muslim vs a non practising Muslim.

Firstly, the Prophets and Sahabah and all the righteous who followed their example were mortals too. Those Muslims today who are holding on to their faith with all they have despite their lives being destroyed by Israeli attacks are mortals too. Those orphans who have no one to care for them are mortals too... it is certainly not our place to decide what length of time or what trial is more than enough. Rather, Allaah :swt: has taught us many times,

...No person is charged with more than his capacity... [2:233]

Allah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity... [2:286]

...Allah does not charge a soul except [according to] what He has given it. Allah will bring about, after hardship, ease. [65:7]

It doesn't matter if it's 'non-practising' Muslims you are dealing with. How does that change the principles we are expected to live by?

My issue and what I can't get my head around, leading me to ditching Islam is why Allah would listen to their duas and give them happiness and make our lives hell? Have I missed something completely? It's Allah's hikmat to do what he wants, but I am just wondering whether I am supposed to do the opposite of what Islam says (like the neighbours) to get my duas accepted. That's where my issue is.

You answered this part yourself. Firstly, you do not know whether Allaah :swt: has answered your neighbours' du'as, nor do you know that they are happy. Secondly, none of us has a bargain that Allaah :swt: is going to answer all our du'as the way we want Him to. There are different outcomes that could happen, and in the end, we trust that Allaah :swt: does what is best and out of His wisdom, gives us what we need, not necessarily what we want. Even the Prophet :saws: did not necessarily have every single du'a answered the way he might have asked for it. So the logic about being worse than Iblis is totally wrong and I am sure you already knew this. Have hope and optimism, which is what Islam teaches us.

No answer?

We must always have certainty that Allah answers. But sometimes doubt enters one’s heart: “…But I asked, I made du`a’... and I don’t see anything?” Firstly, just as we know that Allah is Al-Mujeeb, we must also know He is Al-Hakeem (the Most Wise).

He may delay answering your prayer for a number of reasons; one is to test your trust in Him. We all say we believe Allah is the Al-Mujeeb when everything lands at our feet, but what about when we don’t immediately see the fruits of our du`a’? I knew a woman who was telling the story of how her husband did not pray. When she married him, she didn’t know, and as the marriage progressed she discovered that he was skeptical of religion as well. So she would wake up every night for qiyam al-layl (the night prayer) and plead with Allah to guide Him. Do you know how long she prayed for? Two years. And she says it was so unexpected; he came home from a business trip with a complete change of heart. It turns out that on the plane he was seated next to a great sheikh who began talking to him. And that is how he changed.

Another reason is that Allah knows when it is best to answer. Perhaps you are asking for a job and He could give you a job at this very moment, but He will delay it because He knows that in a couple of months, a better job will come along. Perhaps what you are asking for is not good for you, or He will give you something better in the Hereafter.

Allah also may delay the answer to make us work harder so we are prepared for it. If we look at Palestine, we may think, “Wow, the Muslim Ummah prays so much and we don’t see anything changing.” But in truth, although the majority of the Ummah prays intensely during Ramadan, many do not make du`a’ with true pleading. It is almost an afterthought. And if we do (such as when we see the carnage that happened in Gaza) we do not follow up our words by utilizing the means to change the situation; we forget (as is happening now). There are some genuine people who work for change, but they are a minority. So we need to be patient because we need to know that Allah is training the Ummah. The answer is being delayed so that we become worthy of this task.

There is a beautiful hadith qudsi which states that Allah sometimes delays the answer because He loves hearing the sound of His servant (At-Tabari). Many of us would ask and then when we get what we want we stop going to Allah; but imagine that when the answer is delayed, Allah loves to hear YOUR voice again as you call Him. Wow.

Allah does not place a burden on us greater than we can bear. If the answer to your du`a’ has been delayed, it’s because Allah KNOWS you can handle it. He tests those whom He loves, so keep asking and remember that Allah makes with hardship ease. And remember, as with tawakkul, we need to exert effort as well.

Perhaps it would be good to re-evaluate your du'a... being hasty (saying ‘I supplicated, and I was not responded to’) and not having certainty are barriers to having du'a accepted. Also, do not limit the response to the du'a as being what you specifically have in mind. Allaah :swt: will provide a way out in the way that He knows best.


To end, once again I'd like to point out the irrationality: you are worried about accruing sins through overhearing others' idle conversation in the Masjid, yet you do not seem to be as worried about something so major as leaving Islam - something for which one would spend eternity in Hellfire. Likewise you were worried about having paid Zakah to fraudulent collectors or the lack of concern shown by fellow Muslims in the Masjid. Why do you not then stop yourself from considering something much worse? Perhaps you are saying all this out of frustration rather than a real fear. Your last paragraph was particularly silly - one should not treat it as a trivial or laughing matter. Stop entertaining these thoughts from the Shaytan and focus on turning to Allaah :swt: in these last blessed days and nights of Ramadhan in all sincerity, seeking His help and guidance.

Don't forget these verses,

And whoever fears Allah - He will make for him a way out. And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allah - then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Allah has already set for everything a [decreed] extent. [At-Talaq: 2-3]

[Muhammad]

I highly doubt that reciting Quran will make you a better Muslim bro - being a better Muslim involves more walking, and less talking.

The Qur'an is special; we should not under-estimate the virtue of reciting it. It is a blessed Book, the Words of our Creator, a healing for what is in the breasts, a guidance and mercy for the believers... even if someone doesn't understand it, there is still much to be gained by reciting it. But of course, reading it with meaning and contemplation will have even more of an effect on one's heart.

[greenhill]

Originally Posted by hisnameiszzz
Allah listened to Iblees's dua to give him eternal life and that was accepted, so if my dua's don't get accepted, that must make me worse than him, so for me to follow Islam would be completely pointless.
Not really, there could be many reasons as to why your duas were not accepted, it doesn't necessarily mean that you are worse than Iblis.

I have read on this matter on a few occasions but cannot remember the exact details. It goes something like this,

Allah will surely answer your prayers and it will be in one of 3 ways.

1) immediately (What I would call 'cash terms')
2) sometime in the future (perhaps even given not in this life but the hereafter) (What I would call 'credit terms')
3) substitutes it for something better (so you do not get what you actually asked for but given something better)

These are just pieces of information recalled from the the jumble of info floating in the memory, correct me if I am wrong.

Peace :shade:

[Samiun]

:sl:

Cmon bro don't give up! We all have our challenges and maybe at one point we feel that we might be losing our faith. The reality is that is the challenge that we need to face and we need to quickly solve the problem that is making us so. After all is this is the dunya we are talking about with it's lies and deception. We all struggle bro, although I may not exactly fully understand the extent of your problems but I've been put in a position that makes me angry and full of hatred at one point and I asked Allah for guidance and He gave it to me alhamdulillah..

[hisnameiszzz]

Jazakallah all for your many responses, especially to MUHAMMAD for his very long reply but also to HULK, SCIMITAR, GREENHILL and SAMIUN. It really is much appreciated.

I can fully understand where each and every one of you are coming from but for me, it's just the frustration of it all. Maybe you are right and the dua I am making is all wrong. I rarely ask for anything off Allah as I am happy with what I have been given compared to a lot of other people in the world, however, I do continually thank him for giving me a working body, a family (be it mad), a job, good health, a house etc. A bit of peace and happiness at home is all I have asked for over the last few years but it does not seem like it is happening. If you guys lived next door to these 2 families, I doubt you would be as relaxed. Just now, there have been 8 loud slams and my brother and sister are sleeping as they are tired and are fasting. I do wonder sometimes why Allah does not expose these hypocrites. When they come to the Masjid, it's all sweetness and innocence and mingling with the Imams/Aalims that come from abroad, yet when they are at home, they are probably worse than the nastiest chavvy no religion followers.

MUHAMMAD - you are correct about it seeming irrational. The thing is, I am a good Muslim and I try my best to follow everything by the book. Zakat is something very important to me and my family, so it is somehing I pay extra attention to. However, you are right when you say I follow the small things with devotion yet are happy to turn away from that very religion. Turning my back on Islam is more of a last resort. It's not something I work up one day and thought I would do. By no means am I perfect - I don't have a beard, sometimes I wear jeans which are below my ankle, I am judgemental but I do try and follow Islam as a good Muslim should.

Anyway, that's besides the point, I could write a whole 500 page essay, but this thread was simply to ask if I could carry on posting if I was no longer a Muslim. So thank you very much for that.

[Scimitar]

The Qur'an is special; we should not under-estimate the virtue of reciting it. It is a blessed Book, the Words of our Creator, a healing for what is in the breasts, a guidance and mercy for the believers... even if someone doesn't understand it, there is still much to be gained by reciting it. But of course, reading it with meaning and contemplation will have even more of an effect on one's heart.

I agree with you, and regret my previous statement now... how could I overlook such a thing :(

[Muhammad]

Nobody is perfect, akhee. But how can you consider turning away from Islam simply out of frustration? How will distancing yourself from Allaah :swt: and giving up hope help in bringing about any relief to your problems? This is not a last resort at all... it is the biggest mistake of your life.

but this thread was simply to ask if I could carry on posting if I was no longer a Muslim.

You shouldn't be asking such things in the first place!

[Berries'forest]

:sl:

I am coping well, alhamdulilah. Masha'Allah, you're very lucky that you're a hafiz. I wish I can become one too someday. Try to forget about your neighbors and what they do. Just ignore them I know it's hard at first but it will get easier. And don't lose hope in Allah.

[hisnameiszzz]

Nobody is perfect, akhee. But how can you consider turning away from Islam simply out of frustration? How will distancing yourself from Allaah :swt: and giving up hope help in bringing about any relief to your problems? This is not a last resort at all... it is the biggest mistake of your life.

At this moment in time, it feels like I am praying to no one. My prayers don't get answered at all. Now if it was a pre-requisite of Islam that you have nasty Muslim neighbours who will make your life hell who also have a lot of happiness too, then I would carry on as I am.

It is probably the biggest mistake of my life, but enough is enough and I am at breaking point.

Uncle SCIMI gee said we all have different levels of tolerance. I have reached my tolerance and don't wish to be tested anymore. My Mom and my sister, on the other hand has the patience of a saint. They have been next to these awful neighbours all their lives and they continuously tell me that Islam tells us to be patient, but I no longer agree with them. 7 years of annoyance is far too much for me.

An analogy, be it crap, if I may. If you were working for an employer who had terms and conditions that needed to be followed to maintain you job. Say you had a colleague that did not follow a single term and condition yet their work life was simple and they never got sacked. However, you were constantly **** on from great heights even though you followed all the rules. Would you carry on talking to your manager in 1 2 1's even though nothing ever happened or would you start looking for other jobs?

That is how I feel. Like I said, I am not perfect but by jove, I am following almost all of the terms and conditions of being a Muslim, I think it's about time something went right for me. I've been making the same dua for 7 years now, I think that is a lot of patience. I don't even want an apology, I just want this non stop harrassment to stop. Just yesterday, there was a bayaan in our local Masjid, where the lovely Aalim was talking about Huquqool Ibad. Both sets of nasty neighbours were there and part of me was thinking, finally, my dua has been accepted and they will listen and stop. But no, it obviously went in one ear and out the others, it was just wishful thinking on my part. They were back to their usual selves this morning / afternoon / evening. I give up!

:sl:

I am coping well, alhamdulilah. Masha'Allah, you're very lucky that you're a hafiz. I wish I can become one too someday. Try to forget about your neighbors and what they do. Just ignore them I know it's hard at first but it will get easier. And don't lose hope in Allah.

Salaams. You go for it then. Do they have Hafiz classes where you are? Just one word of warning, remember you will have to keep it memorised for the rest of your life. It's a shame we were never told of this when we started memorising aged 8. I genuinely thought it was just an exercise where you memorised it, go the certificate and that was it.

Have a great Eid by the way.

[Hulk]

Help me understand this brother. For seven years you prayed for your neighbour to stop harassing you?

[Scimitar]

Indeed brother Hulk,

A better dua would be:

O Allah,
Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;

O Allah,
Grant me the courage to change the things I can change;

O Allah,
Give me the wisdom, to know the difference between these two,

O Allah,
Grant me the patience to seek you in every action, and be the rock upon which the best foundations are laid

Ameen

A dua such as this does not victimise oneself, nor does it blame another for their shortcoming - instead, it arms us up with the intention to do the right thing according to the will of Allah, to accept, to live, and to let live - as well to gain a higher wisdom so as not to keep feeling victimised - instead to learn to see things in a better light - one that benefits in spite of hardship.

A Muslim is patient - it is one of our core traits - to be patient.

[hisnameiszzz]

Help me understand this brother. For seven years you prayed for your neighbour to stop harassing you?

Salaams.

Let me break it down for you. I have lived here all my life.

We used to get on OK with the neighbours, they are "Muslim" by the way. We weren't best friends but if we saw them, we said hi etc. My Mom and the woman from next door are from the same village in India and used to live near each other previously too. There have been no fights or arguments with them, so they are not terrorising us because of something we have done.

When they have caused us harrassment, we have spoken to them about it but it made no difference, or they did something to make it worse. For example, the daughter got herself a treadmill and put it in her bedroom and at 7am each morning, she would run on it, so it would wake everyone at ours up. We used to knock back to make her stop, but it made no difference. When my Mom spoke to the woman from next door, she more or less said "It's our house, we do what we want, fork off". The treadmill thing went on for about 6 months. Each Sunday, the daughter decides to hoover the ground floor, first floor and then the bedrooms at about 1am. Yes, that's soon after midnight when they know we are asleep. Again, we told them a few times and got told to stop being complainers. They then put a few dead rats on the car because we complained. There have also been occasions when the daughter has eaten cherries on the balcony and then spat all the pips on to the car / in our yard. The door slamming is a continuous thing and they have done it all their lives, moreso since they stopped going to school (so the last 10ish years). However, in Ramadhan they step it up about 10 notches. None of them are mentally ill or disabled or children, the youngest is 26 and the oldest is 66.

Why don't we call the Police of the Council? We have been there and done that. The son from next door has been locked up numerous times including major credit card fraud, so harrassing the neighbours is not something the Police are very interested in. We have been to the Council, but unless we take it to court, nothing will happen. The son from next door has been in and out of prison and he has a lot "friends". When his drug dealing has gone wrong, these friends have beaten people up and I don't want to be on the receiving end of the thuggish friends. Besides knowing what they are like, they would come and beat my Mom up too. The daughter from next door is quite partials to getting sha**ed by random men. When the brother from next door found out, he beat her black and blue when she tried sneaking in at night (yeah, you guessed it at 3am) and carried on until 5am when the Police eventually came and took the daughter away.

To drown out the door slammings at night, I tried taking sleeping pills, but they didn't work. I've tried praying but I almost jump out of my skin each time the door is slammed. So now I have resorted to watching soaps / wrestling on my laptop and then listen to loud music and take sleeping pills. The soaps / wrestling / music I am ashamed of, but I genuinely cannot drown out the noise without it. I have tried listening to naats and nazams and bayaans but they are not loud enough. Allah knows and in my heart I know that is there was none of this noise pollution, I would not watch soaps / wrestling or listen to music, so I will NOT be held accountable for those sins. My Mom is poorly and has to take a lot of tablets, some of them which make her very drowsy, so she just falls asleep as soon as she gets into bed. How my sister copes is beyond me, but she looks about 20 years older than she is, huge bags under her eyes and has loads of weight, but she is very into her Islam and does the whole "patience" thing very well.

Why don't we sell the house? We have tried. No locals would come to look at it, both neighbours are nasty (one set of neighbours is not as bad as the really nasty ones) and everyone knows what they are like and capable of. We almost sold it once, but word got out about the neighbours so the buyers pulled out.

Why don't we rent it out? See above.

Why don't we buy somewhere else? We would love to but we have no money. This house needs to sell or we are not going anywhere.

As a Muslim, I am now fully aware of trials and tribulations. I was not fully sure of them before because I was in Hafiz class from 8 to 15 so I missed out on all the Islamic Kitaabs such as Hadhrat Umar / Hadhrat Abubakar / Deen Ki Batey but I went back to Madressah and did classes so I learned more about Islam.

I've had moments of madness where I have thought "turn away from Islam" but I've always told myself to stop being so dramatic and get a grip. Anyway, 7 years down the line, I don't think I can take anymore. I've prayed on and off that they get hidayat but it's not happening and the harrassment continues.

What would you guys do in my position? Would you just carry on as normal? I get that my afterlife is going to be fantastic because of all this harrassment and my duas not being accepted in this life, but I am beginning to worry that I am not going to be a Muslim by the time I die. If there is something I am supposed to do before I pray or walk up and down a certain mountain 10 times before I pray, please please please please please let me know.

Anyway, that's that. Regardless of how evil they are, I know it's wrong for me to backbite about them, but I have done this again so you know what they are like........

PS. 4 door slams whilst I have been typing this message, and it's Iftari time here, so I have to dash.

PPS. I know I should be ashamed of myself as I have a house and somewhere to live and a Mom unlike all the orphans in Gaza / Syria / all over the world but I am losing the plot now.

[hisnameiszzz]

PPPS. If I am a bad Muslim, that's OK, I can take it, maybe that is why the neighbors are terrorising me, but why my Mom and my sister? They are good people and they don't have these thoughts about turning their backs to Islam etc.

[hisnameiszzz]

Oh and one final point. I have prayed for other things too. Like my Mom's health. She is elderly and frail and unwell. I have prayed for forgiveness. Also prayed for my Dad who unfortunately passed off 4 years ago. And also for the Ummat. Just all the usual stuff.

Time for twenty prayers now. Speak soon.

[Berries'forest]

Happy eid to you too, we just have to wait a little though. It's been announced that it will be on Monday where I live.

I'm sorry about what you're going through, may Allah ease your pain and hardship. Why don't you consult your local Imam.

[Woodrow]

Salaams.

Let me break it down for you. I have lived here all my life.

We used to get on OK with the neighbours, they are "Muslim" by the way. We weren't best friends but if we saw them, we said hi etc. My Mom and the woman from next door are from the same village in India and used to live near each other previously too. There have been no fights or arguments with them, so they are not terrorising us because of something we have done.

When they have caused us harrassment, we have spoken to them about it but it made no difference, or they did something to make it worse. For example, the daughter got herself a treadmill and put it in her bedroom and at 7am each morning, she would run on it, so it would wake everyone at ours up. We used to knock back to make her stop, but it made no difference. When my Mom spoke to the woman from next door, she more or less said "It's our house, we do what we want, fork off". The treadmill thing went on for about 6 months. Each Sunday, the daughter decides to hoover the ground floor, first floor and then the bedrooms at about 1am. Yes, that's soon after midnight when they know we are asleep. Again, we told them a few times and got told to stop being complainers. They then put a few dead rats on the car because we complained. There have also been occasions when the daughter has eaten cherries on the balcony and then spat all the pips on to the car / in our yard. The door slamming is a continuous thing and they have done it all their lives, moreso since they stopped going to school (so the last 10ish years). However, in Ramadhan they step it up about 10 notches. None of them are mentally ill or disabled or children, the youngest is 26 and the oldest is 66.

Why don't we call the Police of the Council? We have been there and done that. The son from next door has been locked up numerous times including major credit card fraud, so harrassing the neighbours is not something the Police are very interested in. We have been to the Council, but unless we take it to court, nothing will happen. The son from next door has been in and out of prison and he has a lot "friends". When his drug dealing has gone wrong, these friends have beaten people up and I don't want to be on the receiving end of the thuggish friends. Besides knowing what they are like, they would come and beat my Mom up too. The daughter from next door is quite partials to getting sha**ed by random men. When the brother from next door found out, he beat her black and blue when she tried sneaking in at night (yeah, you guessed it at 3am) and carried on until 5am when the Police eventually came and took the daughter away.

To drown out the door slammings at night, I tried taking sleeping pills, but they didn't work. I've tried praying but I almost jump out of my skin each time the door is slammed. So now I have resorted to watching soaps / wrestling on my laptop and then listen to loud music and take sleeping pills. The soaps / wrestling / music I am ashamed of, but I genuinely cannot drown out the noise without it. I have tried listening to naats and nazams and bayaans but they are not loud enough. Allah knows and in my heart I know that is there was none of this noise pollution, I would not watch soaps / wrestling or listen to music, so I will NOT be held accountable for those sins. My Mom is poorly and has to take a lot of tablets, some of them which make her very drowsy, so she just falls asleep as soon as she gets into bed. How my sister copes is beyond me, but she looks about 20 years older than she is, huge bags under her eyes and has loads of weight, but she is very into her Islam and does the whole "patience" thing very well.

Why don't we sell the house? We have tried. No locals would come to look at it, both neighbours are nasty (one set of neighbours is not as bad as the really nasty ones) and everyone knows what they are like and capable of. We almost sold it once, but word got out about the neighbours so the buyers pulled out.

Why don't we rent it out? See above.

Why don't we buy somewhere else? We would love to but we have no money. This house needs to sell or we are not going anywhere.

As a Muslim, I am now fully aware of trials and tribulations. I was not fully sure of them before because I was in Hafiz class from 8 to 15 so I missed out on all the Islamic Kitaabs such as Hadhrat Umar / Hadhrat Abubakar / Deen Ki Batey but I went back to Madressah and did classes so I learned more about Islam.

I've had moments of madness where I have thought "turn away from Islam" but I've always told myself to stop being so dramatic and get a grip. Anyway, 7 years down the line, I don't think I can take anymore. I've prayed on and off that they get hidayat but it's not happening and the harrassment continues.

What would you guys do in my position? Would you just carry on as normal? I get that my afterlife is going to be fantastic because of all this harrassment and my duas not being accepted in this life, but I am beginning to worry that I am not going to be a Muslim by the time I die. If there is something I am supposed to do before I pray or walk up and down a certain mountain 10 times before I pray, please please please please please let me know.

Anyway, that's that. Regardless of how evil they are, I know it's wrong for me to backbite about them, but I have done this again so you know what they are like........

PS. 4 door slams whilst I have been typing this message, and it's Iftari time here, so I have to dash.

PPS. I know I should be ashamed of myself as I have a house and somewhere to live and a Mom unlike all the orphans in Gaza / Syria / all over the world but I am losing the plot now.

PPPS. If I am a bad Muslim, that's OK, I can take it, maybe that is why the neighbors are terrorising me, but why my Mom and my sister? They are good people and they don't have these thoughts about turning their backs to Islam etc.

wa Alaikum Salaam wa Ramatullahi wa Baraktuhu,

Very interesting trials you are going through. I do not have the wisdom or knowledge to tell you what to do. I also suspect that deep in your heart you have already decided what you will do.
You can look at choices you have in your life, and what things you really have choices about.

All problems have the same solutions. Only 3 choices

Remove your self from the Problem

Remove the problem from you.

Change your attitude about the problem.



We humans have much less power than what we think. We are limited. We have to accept our limitations and know that we have to choose between what we want and what is best.

[hisnameiszzz]

wa Alaikum Salaam wa Ramatullahi wa Baraktuhu,

Very interesting trials you are going through. I do not have the wisdom or knowledge to tell you what to do. I also suspect that deep in your heart you have already decided what you will do.
You can look at choices you have in your life, and what things you really have choices about.

All problems have the same solutions. Only 3 choices

Remove your self from the Problem

Remove the problem from you.

Change your attitude about the problem.



We humans have much less power than what we think. We are limited. We have to accept our limitations and know that we have to choose between what we want and what is best.

Salaams.

Many thanks for your reponse.

After listening to another bayaan today, it seems that I have inadvertently become a non Muslim anyway. The Imam said "if you ever question Allah and say why are you not accepting my dua", you automatically denounce your faith. Oooops.

Anyway, if you guys don't mind, I will continue posting and replying to people on IB if it's not a bother. Let me know if you want me to clear off.

Saudi is celebrating Eid tomorrow. So Happy Eid to all those that celebrate it then, and to all the others whenever they are celebrating it.

Once again, thanks for all your time you have made for responding to my threads.

[Signor]

Assalamu Alaikum

Bro,I've found something for you:

For whatever problem we have, whatever difficulty we find ourselves in, we have the most powerful weapon to ward off the pain that plagues us. It is the weapon of du`a’. We know with certainty that Allah is Al-Mujeeb (The Responsive). We have read many articles telling us about the importance of du`a’, but in order for our du`a’ to be truly meaningful, we must accompany that du`a’ with a certain brokenness in the heart. This brokenness is the feeling of utter need, submission and surrender to Allah, and realizing that truly it is only He who can get us out of our state. In a beautiful hadith qudsi, Allah says:

“O My servants, I have forbidden oppression for Myself and have made it forbidden amongst you, so do not oppress one another.

O My servants, all of you are astray except for those I have guided, so seek guidance of Me and I shall guide you,

O My servants, all of you are hungry except for those I have fed, so seek food of Me and I shall feed you.

O My servants, all of you are naked except for those I have clothed, so seek clothing of Me and I shall clothe you.

O My servants, you sin by night and by day, and I forgive all sins, so seek forgiveness of Me and I shall forgive you.

O My servants, you will not attain harming Me so as to harm Me, and will not attain benefitting Me so as to benefit Me.

O My servants, were the first of you and the last of you, the human of you and the jinn of you to be as pious as the most pious heart of any one man of you, that would not increase My kingdom in anything.

O My servants, were the first of you and the last of you, the human of you and the jinn of you to be as wicked as the most wicked heart of any one man of you, that would not decrease My kingdom in anything.

O My servants, were the first of you and the last of you, the human of you and the jinn of you to rise up in one place and make a request of Me, and were I to give everyone what he requested, that would not decrease what I have, any more that a needle decreases the sea if put into it.

O My servants, it is but your deeds that I reckon up for you and then recompense you for, so let him who finds good, praise Allah, and let him who finds other than that, blame no one but himself.”

(Muslim)


Subhan’Allah (exalted is Allah), this hadith requires us to read it more than once to truly grasp its meaning. In essence, Allah is telling us that everything is from Him – He possesses this whole world and all that is in it, therefore we should seek all of our needs from Him.


Allah has named Himself Al-Mujeeb, which means the One who responds. Just as we are certain that the Qur’an is true, we must be certain that Allah, Al-Mujeeb, will answer our call. We should never think that Allah will not answer, because by feeling so, we are denying this attribute (siffat) of Allah. Whenever we are feeling down, we should not hesitate to ask Him over and over again, and to go into sujood (prostration) and plead because that is the closest that we are to Him. If we realize this, the doors of mercy have been opened for us, because the Prophet ﷺ said, “For whoever the door of du`a’ opened, for him the doors of mercy are opened.” (Tirmidhi).


Your du`a’ is deposited with Allah, and as was narrated from the Prophet ﷺ, your du`a’ does something. Either Allah will speedily answer your du`a’ or He will save it for you until the Hereafter, or He will avert something bad equal to the value of the du`a’ (Ahmad). So we should never leave du`a’. The Prophet ﷺ told us, “Do not stop making du`a’, because nobody who makes du`a’ is forsaken.” (Hakim)


Insha’Allah, you will be answered. The Prophet ﷺ said, “Verily your Lord is Generous and Shy. If His servant raises his hands to Him (in supplication) He becomes shy to return them empty.” (Ahmad, Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi)


Remember: our Lord is not forgetful. Sometimes you might even forget that you once made du`a’ for something, but He might give it to you years later.


No answer?
We must always have certainty that Allah answers. But sometimes doubt enters one’s heart: “…But I asked, I made du`a’... and I don’t see anything?” Firstly, just as we know that Allah is Al-Mujeeb, we must also know He is Al-Hakeem (the Most Wise).


He may delay answering your prayer for a number of reasons; one is to test your trust in Him. We all say we believe Allah is the Al-Mujeeb when everything lands at our feet, but what about when we don’t immediately see the fruits of our du`a’? I knew a woman who was telling the story of how her husband did not pray. When she married him, she didn’t know, and as the marriage progressed she discovered that he was skeptical of religion as well. So she would wake up every night for qiyam al-layl (the night prayer) and plead with Allah to guide Him. Do you know how long she prayed for? Two years. And she says it was so unexpected; he came home from a business trip with a complete change of heart. It turns out that on the plane he was seated next to a great sheikh who began talking to him. And that is how he changed.


Another reason is that Allah knows when it is best to answer. Perhaps you are asking for a job and He could give you a job at this very moment, but He will delay it because He knows that in a couple of months, a better job will come along. Perhaps what you are asking for is not good for you, or He will give you something better in the Hereafter.


Allah also may delay the answer to make us work harder so we are prepared for it. If we look at Palestine, we may think, “Wow, the Muslim Ummah prays so much and we don’t see anything changing.” But in truth, although the majority of the Ummah prays intensely during Ramadan, many do not make du`a’ with true pleading. It is almost an afterthought. And if we do (such as when we see the carnage that happened in Gaza) we do not follow up our words by utilizing the means to change the situation; we forget (as is happening now). There are some genuine people who work for change, but they are a minority. So we need to be patient because we need to know that Allah is training the Ummah. The answer is being delayed so that we become worthy of this task.


There is a beautiful hadith qudsi which states that Allah sometimes delays the answer because He loves hearing the sound of His servant (At-Tabari). Many of us would ask and then when we get what we want we stop going to Allah; but imagine that when the answer is delayed, Allah loves to hear YOUR voice again as you call Him. Wow.


Allah does not place a burden on us greater than we can bear. If the answer to your du`a’ has been delayed, it’s because Allah KNOWS you can handle it. He tests those whom He loves, so keep asking and remember that Allah makes with hardship ease. And remember, as with tawakkul, we need to exert effort as well.


Four conditions
Ibn Al-Qayyim said he who fulfills the following conditions should know that Allah will surely answer his du`a’:

1. Have certainty that Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala will answer your du`a’. The Prophet ﷺ said, ”Ask Allah with certainty that He will answer your prayers.” (Tirmidhi)
2. Show submissiveness and devotion during your du`a’. The Prophet ﷺ said, ‘Know that Allah will not accept the supplication from an absent heart.’ (Tirmidhi)
3. Be patient and do not hasten for an answer. The Prophet ﷺ said: ‘The du`a’ of any worshipper will continue to be responded to, as long as… he is not hasty’ i.e. as long as he doesn’t lose patience. [Muslim]
4. Continue to gain a lawful means of living. The Prophet ﷺ narrated a story about a man asking Allah, saying “O Lord! O Lord!” but his food was unlawful, his drink was unlawful, his clothing was unlawful, and he was nourished unlawfully; so how can he be answered?!” (Muslim)

Source

[Muhammad]

:wasalamex

An analogy, be it crap, if I may. If you were working for an employer who had terms and conditions that needed to be followed to maintain you job. Say you had a colleague that did not follow a single term and condition yet their work life was simple and they never got sacked. However, you were constantly **** on from great heights even though you followed all the rules. Would you carry on talking to your manager in 1 2 1's even though nothing ever happened or would you start looking for other jobs?

To be honest, none of the things you have said to justify your feelings/actions make sense, including this analogy. On the one hand you claim none of your prayers have been answered, yet what about all the prayers you did not make and Allaah :swt: still gives anyway? You said yourself you thank Allaah :swt: for a house, family and other things. And there are yet countless other blessings we all enjoy and cannot thank Allaah :swt: enough for. This is just one angle from which your analogy collapses. You also say you 'follow all the rules' yet on the other hand admit shortcomings, then go on to boldly claim you won't be held accountable for them. This is not the right attitude to have at all. Earlier you were concerned about being worse than Iblis. In that case you should take heed of his mistake of being arrogant towards Allaah :swt: and attributing blame to Him. On the other hand, Adam :as: was quick to recognise his own error and seek repentance.

Another glaring error in your analogy is that there is only one path to salvation. If you give up on Islam, which other path is going to lead you to Paradise and safety from the Hellfire? How exactly is giving up on Islam going to make your problems go away?

Now if it was a pre-requisite of Islam that you have nasty Muslim neighbours who will make your life hell who also have a lot of happiness too, then I would carry on as I am.

Is it not a pre-requisite of Paradise to be tested in this dunya? Why then can't you carry on as you are?

Anyway, if you guys don't mind, I will continue posting and replying to people on IB if it's not a bother. Let me know if you want me to clear off.

If you said you were suffering from low eemaan, struggling with your deen etc. that would be understandable. But to make a conscious decision to go so much further than that and turn your back on Allaah :swt:, your deen and your Ummah... including all of us here at Islamicboard, how can you expect us not to feel hugely disappointed in you, to say the least? It is no small thing. As for your posting here, although I don't want you to lose contact with Muslims who can advise you, we will need to consider it. You should know that we will not tolerate any further comments about prayers not being accepted by Allaah :swt:, any negative mention of an Islamic practice like du'a or patience or disregard for the virtue of memorising the Qur'an. We have many people coming here who are considering converting to Islam, who are new Muslims or people who might be struggling in their faith. That is why it is unacceptable for someone to openly proclaim their apostasy and begin sowing seeds of doubts in others. I hope you are also aware of the punishment in Islam for the crime of apostasy. Please, for the sake of your akhirah and every good, reconsider your actions and take control of yourself before it is too late.

May Allah :swt: guide you and keep you steadfast upon Islam until death, Aameen.

[Scimitar]

brother Hisnameiszzz,

I also live in London, maybe we should meet up for a coffee now that Ramadhan has come to a close?

I believe that with the help of Allah aza wa jal, we can come to terms in order to reconcile your focus.

PM me if you are interested in meeting the Uncle everyone loves to hate :D kidding, the uncle everyone hates to love... (again kidding)

The uncle who enjoys coffee and good company, ah yes - that is much better :)

Scimi

[Hulk]

As I said before, not getting what we want does not negate the truth of Islam. It is a strange response to be honest. Reminds me of one of those stories where an atheist professor would say "If God is real, then He will make this chalk break by itself in front of my eyes.".

If that chalk doesn't break, does that mean that God isn't real?

It's silly isn't it, for the professor to assume that he is in a position to give such a challenge to God.

Try going to your boss and tell him "If you're really my boss, then increase my pay!". Sounds silly doesn't it? Who's the one in charge here? You or the boss?

I can't give you a solution to your problem with your neighbours, but I can tell you what is not the solution.

[h-n]

So basically your making the same mistakes as the Jews and the Christians, were when you don't get what you want, don't follow religious laws, don't be religious so you can live and do what you want in the life of this world. It maybe for some in the form of have relationships outside of marriage, it maybe that they wish to make money unlawfully.

Islam is that you SUBMIT to the will of Allah, NOT that Islam give you want you want and think is good for you in this world.

Your allowing the actions of evil people to dictate your relationship with the Lord of the Worlds, the Lord of all the angels, the Prophets.

No one is placing a sword on your neck and forcing you to depart from Islam, but yet you still act as if its your right to live how you wish to live. Its because people have an unreligious view in their lives, that all they need to do is be happy in this world, and when they aren't happy that means there is something wrong with their lives, or that Allah is not giving what you "should" be having. Its is in Paradise that you would be happy all the time.

When did any Prophet come into this world and say as long as you get what you want in this world, then that is all that matters??

Your are critical of your neighbours and if they don't repent, they are on the path to Hell fire.
So the obvious points that you should be saying is that;-

I don't wish to stand with them on the Day of Judgement and go to the Hell fire with them
I don't wish to be tortured in the grave like them.

Why should you wish to live like unbelievers, when you should be earning more reward and doing more then them on the Day of Judgement?? Ie personally would I be happy to earn the same reward on the Day of Judgement as shallow, disrespectful individuals??

If you want Allah to treat you differently from the evil doers and give you more then them, then you shouldn't wish to live like them etc.

When Allah accepted Iblis's prayer it wasn't of anything of benefit to him-he has followed all the Prophets that have appeared in this world, how can you reject all the Prophets?

Your only showing that if you were alive at the time of Prophet Noah peace be upon him and he was being treated badly by the unbelievers, that you wouldn't have wished to stand with him.

Your only showing that if you were alive at the time of Prophet Lut peace be upon him and his home was being attacked by the homosexuals that you wouldn't have stood by him.

Your only showing that if you were alive at the time of Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him that you wouldn't have stood by him. People converted to Islam knowing full well that they were going to be treated badly and be persecuted by the idol worshippers- they didn't join him for an easy life, they didn't join the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him because they thought they were going to have everything they wanted for the life of this world, they knew fully that they would be attacked.

This is the choice that Allah has made either to be evil or to be good. To say that your only going to be good as long as you don't have such and such a problem is not acceptable. As you are valuing others things more then what Allah has taught you, that with him is better. Allah also endorses the truth and helps protect individuals which he has done for yourself as you are still alive! What kind of message would that send out in Islam anyway? That as long as you get what you want and pray, your going to be religious. Allah is testing your loyalty, this isn't a sports match when people wish to endorse the winning side more.

If you want to please Allah, if you love Allah for everything he created which also includes allowing evil doers time to repent in this world, then nothing can lead anyone astray. You are listening to Satan, and he is an excellent at calculating people on what motivates them, what can easily lead them astray. Have you not heard when people in the west say, why would Muslims be religious when they live a western lifestyle-is this not what Satan says, if you sell your soul to me I will help you to be rich etc. Now Muslims are living also in the western world, what with regular electricity, TVs, computers, we still believe in Allah and the hereafter-this is real to us. We still pray 5 times a day and read the Quran, we even fast in the month of Ramadan regardless of what anyone else eats during the day and even when they quench their thirst with a cool drink.

If you want Allah to give you Paradise, then desist from saying you wish to be treated as the evil doers for way of ease in this world. Your not here to choose and dictate how long your test lasts for, Allah is the one testing you (not yourself), were he has allowed even angels -using them to write your records, to even use Archangel Gabriel to give the message to the Prophets, to allow us to have rain and food. There is too much talk going around were Muslims say if you read such and such then everything will be sorted out when Allah has used the word "may" be resolved.

Personally it is helpful to read Surah Mulk, Surah Waq'iah
Also Darood -please read them regularly as they are very helpful.

Remember Allah and the Day of Judgement much.

[hisnameiszzz]

Salaams all.

Thanks for the responses all, especially WOODROW and HULK. It seems like you have understood my predicament and have kindly told me you don't know what I can or should do.

I know I've said a lot of stupid things about Islam and Allah's hikmat (which I will fully repent for I shall add), but it was the month of Ramadhan, I was tired and the neighbours did really really grind me down (try not sleeping because of continuous noise, it's not easy and it does make you go mental!), so much so that if I had a gun, I would happily have gone and shot each and every single one of them. I know it's not very Islamic, but try and put yourself in my situation, it's not easy at all. I have tried to work out why they are doing this to us, but I can't. We have not done anything wrong to them. They know my Mom is now a widow, and she is unwell, yet they still go out of their way to make our lives hell. They must be very sick people indeed!

I was posting on another thread and then Uncle Scimi told me about this website and for some reason, I thought someone would tell me an aayat or surat to pray and it would work and the neighbours maniacal ways would stop, but it did not happen. I guess it just goes to show how desperate I was for an answer, and as it was the first time I spoke about it, I guess I let loose and came out with all kinds of rubbish. I was just so frustrated and I couldn't cope with it.

I'm sorry for any upset or inconvenience I may have caused with this thread. I genuinely did not mean it. I've had a little word with Muhammad (the administrator/moderator) and I did ask him to remove all my threads but it's not possible, so I hope you guys are OK with it. I know some of my threads are very angry and I know I was lashing out but it was a stupid thing to do especially on a website where new Muslims will come to ask for help and advice. *shame on me*

Instead of picking people's brains on here and getting annoyed with the responses, I'm going to be brave and speak to the younger Imam at my Masjid about it as he does daily sessions with people who want to discuss issues they are having. Part of me is very embarrassed as it will be face to face and I don't want him to think I am a weak person complaining about such things, but I genuinely cannot bear this anymore. I know he won't have a word with the neighbours because he doesn't get involved but I hope that he will be able to advise me, perhaps tell me what to do/pray as I know he has mentioned in a sermon before that a grown man approached him in tears because of the harrassment he was getting from his neighbours.

I wish I had the patience of my Mom and Sister but I don't, and I guess I get easily frustrated with the noise and harrassment.


If you guys don't mind, I will continue posting on here, but I shall try my best to refrain from being a moo and complaining too much.

Thanks all.

[greenhill]

Salaams

I reckon let the mods do their bit. :D

The forum is here for you to seek help, opinions, advice etc within reasonable context. It is very helpful for me due to the international collaboration and it being moderated means it is harder to stray.

Complaint all you want, you might find answers or you might not. :p


Peace

[Muhammad Waqqas]

There are so many replies to this thread that my post should presumably be insignificant.

My opinion on all of your issues is a little different. Its not that you have problems. The issue here is we don't realize what HAVE and are focused on what we don't. That's called Shukar.

Being happy has ABSOLUTELY nothing to do with your situation. Trust me when I say this. It has a lot to do with your perspective.

Saying that you should thank Allah for the eyes he has given you, would sound like a sentence you must have heard many times.. but close your eyes for just 10 seconds. And think THIS IS ALL YOUR LIFE. If, when you're reading this post, you loose your eye sight.. would all of your problems still remain as significant as they are?

There was this guy in Karachi, Pakistan. He was a hafiz (and I am not just writing stories I read on some guys blog -- this is real life incident) so the guy was a Hafiz, and he was blind -- normal? right? So a brother that I know met him and asked him how did you memorize the Qur'an that you don't even make the mistake of a single word. He said I had nothing else to do besides revising my lessons. So this friend of mine asked him whats your biggest desire in the world.. he said I just want 10 seconds of eye sight. I want to see how the sky looks like. I want to see how it is to look at a child smiling.. I want to know what 'red' means.. what does 'blue' mean?

Shukar is the way to imaan, its the way to the love of Allah, its the way to happiness.. and in my life's experience, its THE ONLY way to happiness.

I was once in Dubai and I was with my wife, we were looking at a building. You know there are these tall 'burjs' they call them. And I asked her if you have a chance to choose that building you see over there, and all the cars that might be inside it, and all the money and everything.. and the price would be to give away all your hairs and remain bald for the rest of your life, would you give it up for this much money? She obviously said never.. ever.. , but soon after that I related this same incident to another brother (who said he was very sad in his life) and when I told him this, he said I agree with this deal, I am willing to give my hairs for any price (because he was a guy and its not a problem for guys to be bald) so I told him: "Brother, for you the price is not hairs, just two of your lips." They will be cut off from you, and you won't feel ANY pain at all when its cut. But only your front teeth and everything inside your mouth will be visible for the rest of your life.. are you ready to accept this?

What do I mean by this? Every single inch of your body costs so much.. that the entire world can never pay the price.. just one thumb.. or one arm.. or one eye.. Billions and trillions of dollars cannot pay the price of two of your lips.. I have had literally hundreds of such incidents in my life that led me to the love of Allah, Alhamdulillah.

People who are just mad in some women's love? Trying to cut their arms with knifes.. ? Imagine? Love of a Makhlooq? People without eyes, or mutilated faces..

Just one BREATH Alone!! can you hold your breath for a few seconds? How much would you give up if the breath was held for 10 seconds lets say? EVERYTHING.. trust me you'd give everything you've ever had.

Allah :swt1: says in the qur'an:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواْ اذْكُرُواْ نِعْمَتَ اللّهِ عَلَيْكُمْ
O you who believe, remind each other of the favors of Allah upon you.

Change your perspective man.. be thankful that you can even smell the smelly man standing next to you. With the same nose you smelled perfumes thousands of times, or flowers, or freshly cooked food.. How good did you feel then that you even had a nose that can smell? I met a brother once, he was young just 30 or 31 years old.. and we were a few brothers exchanging some perfumes and he said I cannot smell anything. And I was almost shocked? I felt this guy has NO Idea what this beautiful perfume is like.. or how biryani smells or how does a mango smell..

Remembering Allah's blesings is the way to the love of Allah, and its THE ONLY way (in my own humble opinion) to happiness.

[hisnameiszzz]

Thanks for your response MUHAMMAD WAQAS.

Let me spin this around. Put yourself in my shoes. What would you do? Would you just carry on as normal?

What would the other posters on this thread do? I would love to hear your opinions.

We have tried talking to the beasts and they say it's not them, it must be ghosts.
The Police / Council can't help.
You can't get any sleep at all as the noise goes on throughout the night.
You have a stressful job and the problems at home are having a negative impact on your work.

[hisnameiszzz]

Salaams.

No response to my last post? :hmm::hmm::hmm:

Anyway, with it being Friday, I went early for Jummah. There was a sermon by the Imam. He was talking about Huquqool Ibad and how people should respect each others rights, and how if they didn't, they would need to apologise and ask for forgiveness in this world as there would be no chance of this once we are in the hereafter leading to a roasting in hell for eternity. He even gave an example of noisy neighbours (how apt) making life awkward for their neighbours / parking their cars so they blocked their neighbours drive, and how it was necessary for them to go and ask for forgiveness. My noisy neighbours were in the sermon and part of me was hoping the penny would finally drop.

You won't believe what happened after Jummah prayers were over and I was back at home.





The noisy neighbours came home and slammed the doors like their was no tomorrow, not just the downstairs ones but the upstairs ones too! In fact, they have been doing it all day since they came home from Jummah. I guess that means they actually want to go and burn in the fire of hell. To each tiehr own I guess. :raging::raging::raging:

[Scimitar]

LOL... too funny, your neighbours need to remove their doors and go live in a barn :D

try recording the doors slamming and banging, leave the timecode on the video, and then hand that in to the council when you complain - you need PROOF.

Complaining here, expecting Allah to solve your neighbourly problem is too wishful a thought - Allah tells us that HE helps those who help themselves, right?

So what I want to know i - how are you helping yourself?

Are you just sitting there, silently fuming, exasperated and angry? ... or, are you twiddling your thunmbs, furrowing your eyebrows and coming up with a sneaky plan to record the noise pollution you and your family have to deal with on a daily basis?

What practical steps have you taken to deal with it?

Did you invest in those earplugs?

So many questions eh?

Scimi

[MuslimInshallah]

Assalaamu alaikum Hisnameizz,


Actually, I have been thinking the past couple of days about what to say that might help you. I have been reading up some of your previous posts on other links to have a better sense of who you are.


(smile) You are more thought of than perhaps you are aware. Have you seen how many people have been reading your posts?!


The picture that is emerging of you is a bit more complex than just noisy neighbours. To be honest, I'm not sure yet of the whole picture. But as you are asking for feedback right now, I'll say a little something.


You have stated that you have very angry siblings. You've mentioned your father as someone similar. You have painted your mother as the passive recipient of (at least) verbal abuse. You have sisters who seem to tolerate too much, also.


You describe yourself as more quiet. However, you seem very agitated and stressed. You behave somewhat erratically. But stress can do that, too. Lack of sleep can alter a person's personality. So I'm not sure of your true personality (I haven't had the time to read enough posts).


Scimitar makes a good point: what are you actively doing to improve your situation? Ear plugs do exist. So do noise-abating headphones that could lull you with more comforting sounds. So do sound-insulating panels (cheap housing can be very badly sound-insulated; it may not really be the neighbours' fault).


So do decibel-measuring devices,devices for recording sound, notepads to write down the time and date of each occurrence...


Looking from another angle could be interesting, too. Have you considered that perhaps the neighbours find you noisy, too? If there are lots of angry, shouting arguments in your home (which, according to you, there are), perhaps your neighbours are passively aggressively trying to get back at you? Perhaps instead of approaching them to tell them what annoys you,you could try to find out what annoys them? A box of chocolates, an open mind and a compassionate heart can do wonderfully strange things, sometimes.


Or you could try an unusual approach. A sort of: if you can't beat them, join them approach. If they vacuum their home at 1 am... why not phone and ask if they need a hand? Or invite them over for a game of Monopoly (or whatever you think they might genuinely like)?


You could try the common enemy approach: What a lousy builder made these houses! What can we do about it? Sue him? Sue the Council? Work together to get a good price on sound insulation? Make the “we” as large and inclusive as possible.


Mediation could be an option. Is there anyone you both respect?


And of course, there are many other options. But you need to open your heart and mind to them.


However, even if your neighbours were to vanish in a puff of smoke, I have an intuition that the stress in your life would not really be resolved. I suspect that the problem is deeper than that. You see, it is my experience that Allah often Sends us trials and pains in order to make us genuinely and humbly cry out to Him. To knock us off our arrogant perches so that we can work to improve our inner Selves.


But are you ready and willing to look inside yourself and try to set something on the path to healing? Are you in enough pain to risk the pain of healing? Because healing hurts. Ask any burn patient. Taking off bandages hurts.Cleaning out wounds hurts. Healing nerves hurt. If there is a an unhealthiness in our inner Selves, taking off the band-aid (plaster)solutions that helped our child-Selves to cope...hurts. So does cleaning out old wounds. And the healing, awakening Heart feels what it tried to muffle before. Like an ex-smoker, the darkness needs to be coughed out. And it is not easy.


I don't know you very well, Hisnameizz.So perhaps I am off the mark. But you have been crying out for help,so I am offering you my two cents. Please forgive me if I hurt you.


And I pray that He May Guide you and Hold you when you cry.

[syed_z]

My noisy neighbours were in the sermon and part of me was hoping the penny would finally drop.

You won't believe what happened after Jummah prayers were over and I was back at home.

Asalaam O Alaikum...would like to add to beautiful advises have come from my brothers and sisters here...

Theres a saying that if you love others then you will also be loved in return.

Dry to deal with this matter with love in your heart for your neighbors and the best way to start would be offering them a gift.... give them gifts and speaking kindly to them, if you initiate then Allah (swt) will Love you for that and if Allah (swt) will Love you then they will have respect in their hearts inshA'Allah for you and thus your family, they will definitely be ashamed to do things around you thinking that our loving and such well behaved neighbor might hear us, things like screaming and shouting whatever you say they do.....

Prophet (saw) said "Give each other gifts and you will love each other."

....or whenever you cook something or your mother, tell them to add some more for the neighbor's and go to their house and give it to them, personally go and say Salaam. This attitude of your will inshA'Allah bring about good.

You can also visit and ask them if they're ok if you've heard something has happened to them, like an accident in the family or something. Many occasions come like Eid, Miraj Shareef (Ascension), any other personal happiness of yours, share with them and give them something....

But be careful about one thing, if you do the same thing what they do around you, after you have taken the initiative to increase love between your hearts, then expect them to be acting the same way....

....and one thing if you do initiate 1st then do not expect that everything will happen good from the very next day, changes take time, just be patient and keep working on it.

[hisnameiszzz]

Salaams all.

Thanks for all your responses.

SYED-Z - I definitely agree with what you have said. However, we try and stay as far away from the extremely noisy neighbours as possible. The Mom is known as the local gossip and people try and avoid her the best they can. When I have bumped into her in the street, she wants to know where I work and how long I have worked there, why I am going at whatever time I am going at etc etc. Now she is old enough to be my Mom's older sister, but I really don't want to spend hours engaging with a non mahram just for the sake of it.

Don't get me wrong about gifts and giving out food. We happily do that with nicer people such as people who live opposite us, and the lady who lives a street away whose husband died and she is left with 3 young children.

Anyway. I have since contacted the Imam and he has basically told me to be patient and keep on praying (like 7 plus years of praying and being patient is not enough!). He also said he would be more than happy to have a word with my neighbours until I told him who they were and he practically said "I shall leave you to it, goodbye".

I don't really know what more I can do or say about this. I guess this is just how my life is supposed to be. Part of me is ashamed for complaining about such trivial things when there are orphans and other people all over the world suffering, but I also think it's unfair that my life is so messed up thanks to the "Muslims" who live on either side of me.

Thank you to everyone who took the time to reply to my initial post and the others I made in Ramadhan Mubarak. I appreciateyou advice and your ideas. But a huge thank you to everyone who made time for me and my issues, especially in Ramadhan Mubarak.

[InToTheRain]

:salam:

Have you tried Ear Plugs? these seem pretty good:
Hearos Ear Plugs - Xtreme Protection Series, 14 pr: Amazon.co.uk: Health & Personal Care

The rights of neighbours are many so they are committing a lot sins by troubling you this way:

303. Ibn `Umar and `Aishah (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, "Jibril kept recommending treating neighbours with kindness until I thought he would assign a share of inheritance".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, "By Allah, he is not a believer! By Allah, he is not a believer! By Allah, he is not a believer.'' It was asked, "Who is that, O Messenger of Allah?'' He said, "One whose neighbour does not feel safe from his evil".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

[Zaynab Academy]

Assalamualikum WRWB,
Slightly confused as not allowed to post links, wanted to announce a few upcoming ZAO Islamic Online events for Sisters only. like Positive parenting and Quran Program
how to possibly give registration link?

JazakumAllah khayr

[hisnameiszzz]

:salam:

Have you tried Ear Plugs? these seem pretty good:
Hearos Ear Plugs - Xtreme Protection Series, 14 pr: Amazon.co.uk: Health & Personal Care

The rights of neighbours are many so they are committing a lot sins by troubling you this way:

303. Ibn `Umar and `Aishah (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, "Jibril kept recommending treating neighbours with kindness until I thought he would assign a share of inheritance".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, "By Allah, he is not a believer! By Allah, he is not a believer! By Allah, he is not a believer.'' It was asked, "Who is that, O Messenger of Allah?'' He said, "One whose neighbour does not feel safe from his evil".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Salaams.

Thank you so much for your response.

Scimitar mentioned ear plugs too, but my Mom is frail and elderly, so I need to keep my ears open in case she asks for help at night or has a fall or something like that. I've stopped listening to music to get me to sleep because it gives me headaches, but listening to the non stop door slams is not much help either.

Thanks a lot of the hadeeths too. I really hope they get the punishment they so rightly deserve. They have made our life a living hell. I'm just back from work. I've had a busy day. I was hoping to come home to some peace and quiet, but both neighbours are slamming doors again as I type. I actually give up! ^o)^o)^o)