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View Full Version : I talked to my Iman today about marrying a girl and I am still confused!



jibrael2292
01-03-2015, 03:54 AM
Hello everyone:

THis is my first post within this amazing community. I hope someone can give me the proper guidance that I seek. I talked to my iman today at the mosque and he told me that he personally can not perfrom the marriage unless I get a marriage licence form the state in which i live in. He did say, however, that someone else can perform it.

I have the following questions--

Who else can I get to perform the ceremony since the iman will not?

The woman I am marrying is a non-muslim and has no family members here to act as her wali (representitive), I have read that since she is a non-muslim she does not necessarily need a representitive, is this true?

Is a written marriage contract required?

What other requirements are there?


Thank you for your time!
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greenhill
01-03-2015, 12:19 PM
Welcome to the forum.

Islam is simple, laws of the land is complicated. You have asked two separate questions here, one about the potential spouse, the other about legalities. Islamic and country laws. And I can answer none.

There's much to consider, I'm guessing you are 22/23 years old. Take time to find out more. What does she feel about Islam etc..

Wishing you a great stay.

:peace:
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Muslim Woman
01-03-2015, 01:42 PM
:sl:


Muslim men are allowed ( but not encouraged ) to marry chaste Jewish and Christian women . Though some scholars say now a days it's not allowed anymore to marry them . Talk to a Mufti if possible.

Marriage contract laws are different in various countries . So , better to talk to a local marriage lawyer for details .


Marry someone who will help u to be a better Muslim . May Allah grants what is best for u .
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فصيح الياسين
01-04-2015, 02:47 PM
Better to ask frm mufti about it. Like muslim woman said marrying christian jew are discouraged now due to many reasons. May allah help u and guide u the rightious path
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MuslimInshallah
01-16-2015, 01:56 PM
Assalaamu alaikum Jibrael,


I would like to point out to you that your Imam didn't refuse to marry you, he just asked that you get a state license.


Mmm…why don't you get a license? This makes your marriage publicly acknowledged.


I spoke about this issue recently with one of our local (in Canada) Imams. More and more Imams are becoming concerned with the abuse of the institution of marriage by certain Muslim men. These men lead women into believing that they are getting decently married, but have no intentions of honouring their marital obligations. It's just a method to cover their seductions with a veneer of halalness.


This is why Imams are increasingly asking for official licenses. It is to protect the vulnerable women (and their children) from abuse.


I'm pretty sure that if you got a marriage license, your Imam would answer all your questions.


For the record, I would advise all women to ask someone to be their wali (someone who looks out for their interests), and have the potential husband screened, a decent mehr fixed (don't fall for the “it's just symbolic” argument. It isn't. A man who gets a woman for, say, a symbolic 1 cent, is unlikely one who respects her), and have a properly drawn up and witnessed nikkah (marriage contract). As a contract, it is possible that it would be legally recognized, even in a non-Muslim majority country.


A man who does not want a woman to benefit from these God-given protections, is one who is unlikely to remain with, or support her. And her children will likely suffer.


And for Muslim men who are considering “marriage” with women they are not serious about, I would suggest they think about Allah, and the Day when our actions will be stripped of our comforting self-lies. Marriage is a beautiful and sacred Gift from our Creator, not something to be played with and made a mockery of.


I'm sorry if I am a bit harsh with you, Jibrael. If I have misunderstood your intentions (and I hope that I have), I apologize. This message will then have been written for others who maybe considering marriage.


May Allah, the Oft-Forgiving and Compassionate, Bless you with a strong and beneficial marriage.
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