Sleeping Problems

[hisnameiszzz]

Salaams all,

I am suffering from really bad insomnia. I think it's a mixture of nerves and stress. My very unkind Muslim neighbours have a penchant for slamming doors / hoovering / hammering / various other noise pollution until late at night / early morning. Because of this, I struggle to get to sleep because I am always on edge wondering if the noise pollution will start up again. For example, I try and get to sleep at 00:30 but the unkind neighbours slam the bedroom door shut full blast waking me up again.

This has been ongoing for quite some time, and I have had to move my bed so it is not up against the party wall. In fact, I have moved it right to the other end of the bedroom. However, the noise pollution is too loud and it still keeps me up.

I am intending to move in the not too distant future (please all make dua that the person selling his house accepts my offer!) so I am taking steps to try and sort this issue out.

In the meantime, could someone suggest ideas on what I can do to help me get to sleep as I am coming close to losing my mind.

So far, I have tried:

1) Praying Quraan / tasbeehs / dua etc but it makes no difference.
2) Taking sleeping tablets, these no longer work as I have been taking them for so long.
3) White noise apps and machines but these are too quiet and the noise pollution is too loud.

I'm at a loss as to what I can do next. I have been listening to ocean waves / birds chirping kind of music via headphones and I have to have this on all night, so I don't actually fall to sleep properly which is having an adverse effect on my overall health.

Has anyone else suffered from insomnia related to noise pollution and what have you done to combat this? I would very much like to hear your thoughts and advice. I thank anyone in advance who might be able to help.

PS. I have been to the GP and she has said to move, but I can't just move out like that as I have to get my finances sorted.
PPS. I've tried talking to the unkind neighbours but they have said it's our problem if I can't sleep, not theirs.

[strivingobserver98]

:sl:

Turn off all technology 3 hours before sleeping. Have you tried reading a book or something before sleeping? It usually helps for me.

[hisnameiszzz]

:sl:

Turn off all technology 3 hours before sleeping. Have you tried reading a book or something before sleeping? It usually helps for me.

Jazakallah for your response.

If I turned the technology off, i.e. the mp3 player and the headphones, I would only hear the thudding / slamming / hammering / crashing which makes me more nervous.

I've not been able to read a book at home in years. I normally read a page or two and then the door crashing / slamming / thudding does my head in.

Like I said, I am in the process of moving (or looking at options) but this cannot go on as I am making myself ill.

[strivingobserver98]

Jazakallah for your response.

If I turned the technology off, i.e. the mp3 player and the headphones, I would only hear the thudding / slamming / hammering / crashing which makes me more nervous.

I've not been able to read a book at home in years. I normally read a page or two and then the door crashing / slamming / thudding does my head in.

Like I said, I am in the process of moving (or looking at options) but this cannot go on as I am making myself ill.

Process of moving? That's a good start. keep looking for options, :ia: your patience will be worth it.

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[hisnameiszzz]

Process of moving? That's a good start. keep looking for options, :ia: your patience will be worth it.

Please pray that the offer I have placed gets accepted, and then hopefully I will be out of this hell hole in a few months.

My poor Mother didn't get any sleep last night and she was shaking this morning she was that worried and stressed out. I hate what the neighbours are doing to us. I don't know what they get out of it.

[strivingobserver98]

Please pray that the offer I have placed gets accepted, and then hopefully I will be out of this hell hole in a few months.

My poor Mother didn't get any sleep last night and she was shaking this morning she was that worried and stressed out. I hate what the neighbours are doing to us. I don't know what they get out of it.

:ia: you will get accepted brother.

I wanted to share this dua with you :)

اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنَ الْهَمِّ وَ الْحَزَنِ ، والْعَجْزِ ، والْكَسَلِ ، والْبُخْلِ ، والْجُبْنِ ، وضَلَعِ الدَّيْنِ ، وغَلَبَةِ الرِّجَالِ


Allahumma inni 'a'udhubika minal hammi walhuzni, Wal'ajzi walkasali, walbukhli waljubni, Wa dal'id-daiyni wa ghalabatir-rajal

‘O Allaah, I take refuge in You from anxiety and sorrow, weakness and laziness, miserliness and cowardice, the burden of debts and from being over powered by men.’

Sahih al-Bukhari [7/158]

[sister herb]

Salam alaykum

Depending of the type of the house/apartment you are living, you can take contact to landlord/lessor or police if your neighbours don´t stop disturbing noise at the night time. Are there other neighbours whose also have problems with that night-time noise?

Also (maybe you have tried this already), what about trying the earplugs?

[hisnameiszzz]

FARHAAN - Jazakallah for that dua. I am going to print it out and memorise it and pray it non stop with the other 2 I have: La illaha illa anta subhanaka innit kuntu minaz zalemeen and Ya hayo ya qayoon berahmatika astageeth. I am hoping Allah will answer my prayer.

SISTER HERB - Thanks for your response. They do have other neighbours but the houses have a bit of a gap between them. Our house is directly attached to the NFH next door hence us getting all the noise. I've contacted the local authority and they have said they cannot do anything about the door slamming and throwing things around and hoovering late at night. Apparently, that's just normal household noise (even at 1am?)! We could pursue this, but if we ever decide to sell the house (which is likely if my offer gets accepted), then we would have to declare to the new buyers about the problems with the neighbours which would mean no one would be interested.

Ear plugs I have tried and they did not work.

[sister herb]

You better then inform your neighbours (when you will plan to sell your house) that you are looking for some punk band as a buyer (as your neighbours seem like the noise).

( ;D Sorry couldn´t resist myself...)

[hisnameiszzz]

Grrr! The offer has been refused and I simply cannot afford to put any more money into a new house. Boooooooo!

[Jannat Seeker]

وَعَلَيْكُمْ السَّلاَمُ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ

Sorry to hear about your problem. Have you tried complaining to your local council about this ?
Do some heavy exercise before going to bed, your body will be tired & get some sleep hopefully...

May ALLAH helps you to get over this as soon as possible.

[BeTheChange]

وَعَلَيْكُمْ السَّلاَمُ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ

Sorry to hear about your problem. Have you tried complaining to your local council about this ?
Do some heavy exercise before going to bed, your body will be tired & get some sleep hopefully...

May ALLAH helps you to get over this as soon as possible.

Asalamualykum

Am so sorry to hear this is still ongoing. imsad So you've spoken with the LA and they refuse to do anything.

Okay, the only real solutions i can see is to move out or to do what Jannat advised? ^^^

I know it's not fair on you but if neighbours are refusing to listen to you then it's hard to progress with this.

Are you on good or bad terms with the neighbours? Try an sweeten them up so every so often & take a meal to them - Don't mention the noises, just focus on improving your relationship and hopefully this will make them stop the noise levels? What do you think?

Jazahka Allah for dua brother Farhan! :statisfie

I hope the situation improves for you, your mum and family Ameen.

[hisnameiszzz]

JANNAT SEEKER - Thanks for your kind words. I do go to the gym (quite embarrassing because I normally fall asleep at the gym, I am that tired), but not even that works. The people next door make far too much noise, not even tiredness allows me any sleep. But thanks for your kind words all the same.

BE THE CHANGE - The local authority does not take much interest if both parties are home owners. I work for the local authority anyway, so was hoping I would get more help but the response I got was "we could send them a letter and see if anything changes". If they send a letter, it goes on record, so if we wanted to sell this house, we HAVE to by law declare it otherwise we could end up getting sued. They also said try and have a word with them and see if that changes anything! The problem is the neighbours are so nasty they won't even listen. My Mom is a widow, they know this as they have lived next to us for over 30 years. They know my Mom is disabled. They know my brother has a long term illness but they still torment us. They slam each and every single door hundreds of times during the day knowing fully well my Mom is going to be at home, so they are doing it on purpose to unnerve her which unfortunately, they do! They are so vindictive, they wait to see when me and my brother come home from work (the car is in our parking spot when we come home), and then all of a sudden, they will want to hoover the whole house and slam each and every door in the process. So if we came home from work and wanted to rest for a while, there would be chance of it. The thing is they are not reasonable people. If they were, this would not still be happening.

I guess the only option is to move, but it's easier said than done. The offer I put on a house has been refused and I simply cannot afford anything else. And I keep bursting into tears at random times. I am so upset with my life at the moment, I just don't know what to do. I'm stuck in a rut and worst of all, I am NOT getting a single bit of sleep which is driving me mad! :raging:

Please pray I get some sleep tonight. I've just been praying like crazy but the noise pollution is ongoing.

[BeTheChange]

JANNAT SEEKER - Thanks for your kind words. I do go to the gym (quite embarrassing because I normally fall asleep at the gym, I am that tired), but not even that works. The people next door make far too much noise, not even tiredness allows me any sleep. But thanks for your kind words all the same.

BE THE CHANGE - The local authority does not take much interest if both parties are home owners. I work for the local authority anyway, so was hoping I would get more help but the response I got was "we could send them a letter and see if anything changes". If they send a letter, it goes on record, so if we wanted to sell this house, we HAVE to by law declare it otherwise we could end up getting sued. They also said try and have a word with them and see if that changes anything! The problem is the neighbours are so nasty they won't even listen. My Mom is a widow, they know this as they have lived next to us for over 30 years. They know my Mom is disabled. They know my brother has a long term illness but they still torment us. They slam each and every single door hundreds of times during the day knowing fully well my Mom is going to be at home, so they are doing it on purpose to unnerve her which unfortunately, they do! They are so vindictive, they wait to see when me and my brother come home from work (the car is in our parking spot when we come home), and then all of a sudden, they will want to hoover the whole house and slam each and every door in the process. So if we came home from work and wanted to rest for a while, there would be chance of it. The thing is they are not reasonable people. If they were, this would not still be happening.

I guess the only option is to move, but it's easier said than done. The offer I put on a house has been refused and I simply cannot afford anything else. And I keep bursting into tears at random times. I am so upset with my life at the moment, I just don't know what to do. I'm stuck in a rut and worst of all, I am NOT getting a single bit of sleep which is driving me mad! :raging:

Please pray I get some sleep tonight. I've just been praying like crazy but the noise pollution is ongoing.

Okay. How is your relationship with your neighbour?

By the sounds of things, you have tried to speak to them and they not budging. If they are not listening and LA is not helping, then it is very hard to work towards a resolution.

I can hear the frustration and i do feel for you. I know it's a drastic decision and it is very unfair on you and your family to experience this. It's not fair that you have to even think about moving out just because of the noise levels!!

How about the police will they do anything?

I know when we had problems with kids playing football outside in our residential area - we spoke to the police and they sent out letters to local residents to stop the kids from playing as we had incidents of broken windows and damage to cars....

This stopped the kids from playing football outside on our street. Can you take a similar approach and speak to officers?

[hisnameiszzz]

That's a thought and I will see if the Police or a Anti Social Behaviour Order Officer would do anything but I doubt it. The Police do not have powers to take on these things, especially as it is between 2 homeowners. I guess they could come and have a word, but knowing what the unkind neighbours are like, they would make our life more hellish.

The only real option I have is to move out (which is not going to be easy as I just cannot afford it. If this house sells - if my Mom agrees to move as I can't just turf her out, the money has to be split between the wareeths since my Dad is no longer with us and that won't leave me with much) or end my life, which probably is the easiest option. I might actually get some sleep that way! :hmm:

[BeTheChange]

That's a thought and I will see if the Police or a Anti Social Behaviour Order Officer would do anything but I doubt it. The Police do not have powers to take on these things, especially as it is between 2 homeowners. I guess they could come and have a word, but knowing what the unkind neighbours are like, they would make our life more hellish.

The only real option I have is to move out (which is not going to be easy as I just cannot afford it. If this house sells - if my Mom agrees to move as I can't just turf her out, the money has to be split between the wareeths since my Dad is no longer with us and that won't leave me with much) or end my life, which probably is the easiest option. I might actually get some sleep that way! :hmm:

Okay, if you think by going to the police it will aggravate the situation more. Don't take that step.

If you show kindness towards your neighbours i.e. let them park in your space, take them food, try and assist them with general queries etc without showing your frustration, without mentioning the noise levels do you think this will help?

Don't think about suicide brother, exhaust a few more avenues before you can say you are defeated & even if we think we are defeated this is never true, if we show patience and steadfastness we will succeed in sha Allah

Give it a go? Maybe, your neighbours will show kindness back?

[hisnameiszzz]

If you show kindness towards your neighbours i.e. let them park in your space, take them food, try and assist them with general queries etc without showing your frustration, without mentioning the noise levels do you think this will help?

Don't think about suicide brother, exhaust a few more avenues before you can say you are defeated & even if we think we are defeated this is never true, if we show patience and steadfastness we will succeed in sha Allah

Give it a go? Maybe, your neighbours will show kindness back?

They had a wedding at theirs a few months ago. We were invited and I told my Mom that there was no chance in hell I would go. They have tormented us for years on end and there was more chance of me eating horse dung. (Sorry, I am not being dramatic, but that calculating vicious family has deprived me of sleep for months and months now and I cannot even feel safe in the sanctity of my own home). Anyway, my Mom convinced me to go and said the invite was from Allah and not actually them, and how it was wrong to say no to an invite etc etc etc. So we went, and we went out of our way to be helpful - served everyone, helped with carrying stuff, setting tables, you name it, we did it. To anyone else, it must have seemed like we and them were on very good terms and were best of friends. And how did they repay us, non stop door slamming, and the usual noise pollution intensified that we have been tormented to for the last few months. Even my nephews cry at night if they come to sleep at ours because they are scared by the noise. The neighbours are pure vindictive and vicious.

Why Allah won't listen to my prayers or help me and my family is really getting to me. I am beginning to wonder if we are doing things wrong or if we, indeed, are cursed. I get the whole, "you are being tested, be patient" thing, but this really is taking the biscuit. I also understand that there are so many people out there suffering, such as the people of Nepal, people in the 3rd world countries, etc etc, but let me assure you that if you have suffered from neighbours from hell for years on end, you will feel lost and confused and suicidal. I am an emotional wreck at this moment in time. What I have done to deserve this is beyond me.

[BeTheChange]

Okay sometimes kindness is not met with kindness. I think as human beings when we do a good deed we expect good back from the same individual, but we go wrong here - as we shouldn't expect anything from humans but everything from Allah swa.


As a human being, it's normal for us to question why Allah swa has brought a certain 'calamity' upon us. It is normal to ask why me? However, we should never ever question why Allah swa 'appears' to have not accepted our dua.


I have read - how we view and think of Allah swa - this is how our duas will be treated. For example, if we make a dua with our tongues and not our heart - thinking Allah swa will not answer my dua, then (Allah swa knows best), this is what will happen. Allah swa treats a servant according to his/her intentions! So please be careful, with your words.


Allah swa IS listening to YOU! Of course HE is! Allah swa CAN hear you - & only Allah swa knows why you are in this situation. It's not what you have done to deserve this but what you do and the character that you display will determine whether you succeed this test/situation.


If you truly feel you have tried all possible avenues and nothing is working then take steps to move. Keep trying, in sha Allah, something will come up. I know am not in your shoes, and maybe it is easy for me to say this, but - be patient brother.


Having a noisy sheltered comfortable accommodation is better than being homeless and there will be many other things you can find in your life to be grateful for. i.e. you have a GOLDEN opportunity to reap the rewards of helping your mum!

I have a very useful e-book for you called Dua - the weapon of a believer!

Please visit http://www.kalamullah.com/worship.html to download the e-book for free!

In sha Allah it will help you!

[greenhill]

I can't fail to notice how many threads this persistent problem you are facing with the inconsiderate and noisy neighbours we have. It seems that there are no obvious solutions. Would it helpful to put another wall up with good sound insulation? Solves the noise issues. Then you don't have to leave. There is cost involved but may be well worth in the long run. :peace:

[saif-uddin]

:salam: akhi hisnameiszzz,

read this concerning Noise pollution

http://www.environmentlaw.org.uk/rte.asp?id=76

also enter your postcode into this site,

https://www.gov.uk/report-noise-pollution-to-council

it will link you to your council cite and give you further info about what you can do about the Noise/Anti-Social behaviour issue of your neighbours,

plus don't forget to Read the Dua Farhan cited!

:ia: you will get accepted brother.

I wanted to share this dua with you :)اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنَ الْهَمِّ وَ الْحَزَنِ ، والْعَجْزِ ، والْكَسَلِ ، والْبُخْلِ ، والْجُبْنِ ، وضَلَعِ الدَّيْنِ ، وغَلَبَةِ الرِّجَالِ


Allahumma inni 'a'udhubika minal hammi walhuzni, Wal'ajzi walkasali, walbukhli waljubni, Wa dal'id-daiyni wa ghalabatir-rajal

‘OAllaah, I take refuge in You from anxiety and sorrow, weakness and laziness, miserliness and cowardice, the burden of debts and from being over powered by men.’

Sahih Al-Bukhari [7/158]

:jz:

[hisnameiszzz]

BETHECHANGE - Thanks for your lengthy response. I appreciate it. I will download your DUA booklet and see if I can read it at the Masjid when I go for namaaz. I can't read it at home, too much noise from you know who!

I think being patient for so many years has shown what character I have. However, if this carries on, I might end up self harming. I just don't see any other way out. Maybe that's what it says in my takdeer after all.

Thanks for your concern and your kind posts.


GREENHILL - I promise not to start any more threads on the issues I am having. I'm sorry I've taken up so much of your webspace. I will ask the operator/moderator if we can have some of the threads deleted. Once again, apologies. I am sorry, but I know I am clutching at straws. A few people at work keep telling me to start drinking to block it all out, but I would rather see if there were any other avenues before I resort to something like that.

I've already checked the sound proofing. To have all the party walls sound proofed, it would be about £15K. However, it is not guaranteed to work and I have checked various NOISY NEIGHBOURS forums and people have wasted a lot of money on things they thought would work but made no difference.

SAIF-UDDIN - I already am praying that dua with a few others than AYSHA told me about via pm. Do I have to pray them for a certain number of days / number of times before they work?

I know the best option to come out of this alive and sane is to move out, but it's not that easy. I don't have the money to move out. I work part time because I look after my Mom so I can't exactly get a huge mortgage. I don't have much money saved up. So that limits me to what I can and can't do. Also, I am emotionally fragile, burst into tears at any opportunity, I can't even think straight anymore (I've been typing this response for 2 hours). However, I have registered with numerous estate agents and look on websites everyday to see if something has come up. Please don't think I just come on here to vent and hope that someone will magically transport me from this terror I am facing to pastures new.

Anyway, thanks again for your time guys. I appreciate it and apologies if you think I am just a broken record. I promise no more posts about my neighbours on here again.

[greenhill]

Just saying. . . I believe I replied in every thread you posted on this matter where I feel I could add. But it seems that your neighbours are beyond reproach. Take up playing the drums and remember, you don't have to play well at all. Or the bagpipes... (I'm just being... can't think if the word.) Most likely it won't tak all the noise out but can substantially mute the loudness to mere 'thuds'.. might prolong your sanity. Look up second have sound proofing materials from studios closing down etc... you might get lucky... :peace:

[saif-uddin]

Akhi hisname iszzz

did you do the following?

read this concerning Noise pollution

http://www.environmentlaw.org.uk/rte.asp?id=76

also enter your postcode into this site,

https://www.gov.uk/report-noise-pollution-to-council

it will link you to your council cite and give you further info about what you can do about the Noise/Anti-Social behaviour issue of your neighbours,

:jz:

[hisnameiszzz]

Uncle SAIF-UDDIN - I work for the Council. I know the policies inside and out. They will not help me. I have read the documents you mentioned. I have already contacted them via email and via the telephone. They said the noises I am mentioning are normal noises. They can't go in and confiscate the doors from the neighbours. They will only get involved if it is loud music as they can go round and confiscate the music players.

The Council only get involved if the houses that are causing the problem are owned by the Council. For instance, if the neighbours were renting from the Council, they would come down on them like a ton of bricks. The neighbours house is owned by them and ours is owned by us, so they won't be interested in helping us.

I have also joined a few forums where people have been suffering from noise pollution. The local authority / Council / Environmental Health teams are useless and have not helped anyone. They make you keep noise pollution logs and they put machines to record the noise but most of the time they say doors are being slammed and quite loudly but they are not constant, so we can't do anything about it.

GREENHILL - I'm sorry if I sounded shouty in my previous post. I was not having a go at you. I came on to ISLAMIC BOARD last year, secretly hoping someone would give me a magic dua or prayer that would help, or something stupid like that. Desperate people do desperate things don't they? Hence the non stop threads on almost the same issue. I'm sorry if I have gone on and on and on. I'm just so helpless and I have no idea what to do. For instance, it's been non stop throwing doors shut today. I've been at home all day helping Mom out, apart from when I went for Zohar, but even then I could not concentrate as I have a thumping headache. And now I feel sick. I would go and sit in a park but it is chucking it down and my Mom is also so tired, she keeps falling asleep.

I will look into the sound proofing that you mentioned. I am more than happy to spend all my savings as long as I can get a bit of sleep back. I have a Mom to look after and I cannot go on like this. She is elderly and needs to be looked after and I am making myself ill and cranky because of this constant harassment.

Thanks again all for your kind words and your help and advice.

[greenhill]

I wished there was a magic dua. I know there are magic moments. Only we don't know when it is exactly. Everyday, there is a small moment in time that if you so happen to make sincere dua Allah will grant it. It's been a while since I last came across it and I have forgotten much about it. But all this does not help much improve the situation. Maybe you should look at reorganisation. Find a room furthest away from the noisy neighbours that is small enough to soundproof and have that as your safe room. :peace: