format_quote Originally Posted by
SaraMukhtar12
Since I am shy that means I barely stand up for my self. How do I do that? I find it extremely difficult.
Not sure if I understand correct. Shy to wear hijab? From my read, it is probably more to do with shy as in the lack of confidence. If that is the case (about confidence) then it is more to do with you and what you are willing to do about it. There are no magic formulas that will suddenly find you having no problems to speak out and standing up for yourself. This is a conscious effort requiring definite input from you to overcome.
The first hurdle that I see is the point you made about 'being quiet and non social'. Nothing wrong with being quiet and being social is kind of overrated anyway. But if overcoming shyness is what you want and developing confidence, then being away from interacting with people is not the way forward.
When I was studying, the scariest moments for me was to put up my hands in class to ask questions. Almost went through my whole studies without ever doing it (but instead, approaching the teachers after classes to ask the question privately). But this was a fear that I had to overcome. Proper planning on the question helped. Repeated rehearsing the question in my head gave me the assurance that the question was clear. Many other doubts also entered my mind, like was I going to make a fool of myself? and the feeling that the entire class was watching me or that I jumbled up my thoughts ....especially my wildly beating heart that I cannot ignore did not help. But I had to get over it. It must start with you.
Then I made it a point to try starting a conversation with people, but I would start with people I often meet but never talked to. General conversations to begin with. Then perhaps eventually, meet up for a drink or so (if the conversation develops into 'friendship').
Overcoming shyness is not an easy matter. It must be built bit by bit. Firstly starting with you. Be comfortable with yourself (not to the point of not needing anyone) but in a way that getting bad responses from people does not make you lose spirit in the effort to get to know people...
:peace: