The nosey culture

[strivingobserver98]

This quite a major problem in some cultures and I guess people should be mindful of it.

A common example for newly weds is...
Everyone asks hubby and wife, questions like Are you pregnant ? Any plans? update? Due date ? And they do never ending guessing and all these sort of questioning etc.

It is part of etiquette to refrain from asking people about their private affairs.

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“Part of a person’s being a good Muslim is leaving alone that which does not concern him.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (2318);

Imam Abu ‘Amr ibn al-Salaah narrated that Abu Muhammad ibn Abi Zayd, the imam of the Maalikis of his time, said:
All good manners and etiquette are based on four ahaadeeth:

The words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him speak good or else keep silent.”

And the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Part of a person’s being a good Muslim is leaving alone that which does not concern him.”

And the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Do not get angry.”

And the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “The believer loves for his brother what he loves for himself.”

Al-Munaawi said in Fayd al-Qadeer (7/3):
It is possible that what is meant is asking a man too many questions about his situation, which includes asking about that which does not concern one. That also may lead to embarrassment for the one who is being asked, because he may prefer not to tell him about his situation, and if he tells him he may feel upset about that, but if he lies to him or tries to give indirect answers he may still feel upset, and if he ignores his question that will be bad manners.

In this regard there are common saying as the below which point to these manners as below.

Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates. At the first gate, ask yourself ‘Is is true.’ At the second gate ask, ‘Is it necessary.’ At the third gate ask, ‘Is it kind.’

The only way we will derive any benefit from this little post is if we practice considering what we say before we say it.

[emoji115]it is a duty upon every man to educate his womenfolk and unfortunately the above is mainly prevalent amongst our sisters and some brothers.

- Brother Usumah

[BeTheChange]

Asalamualykum,

This is the bane of my life.

I try to be a private person.

I mind my own business and i expect others to do the same but some people interview/interrogate you as if they are working for BBC News, Sky, Al Jazeera etc.

If you don't answer the questions in the way they are supposed to be answered, then you're in big trouble. The elders will think you're being rude but you're honestly not being rude.

I feel the outside community ask more of me than my own parents. Subhana Allah.

I know you can dodge the questions with humour and intellect but one shouldn't need to.

May Allah swt give us all wisdom in our interactions Ameen.