:bism:
Aww, I'm sorry that it's been terrible.
(Hugs.) Feel better.
Hey, there's a specific Arabic
dua (supplication to God) from the prophetic tradition that I use, which
Masha-Allah (as God willed) always works for me to have and feel peace the entire day.
In-sha-Allah, the
dua (supplication to God) below works as beautifully for you too.
Transliteration of the Arabic:
Allahumma antas-salam waminkas-salam, wa ilayka wa ilayka yaudu salaam, fa hayinna Rabbana bi salaam, wa dkhilnal jannata bi-lutfika wa karamika wa judika daraka, Daras Salam. Tabarakta Rabbana wa talayt, ya Zhul-Jalai wal Jamali, wal Baqai wal Azamati wal Ikram. Ya Rabbana, Ya Rabbighfir warham wa Anta Khayrur Rahimeen.
Translation of the Arabic:
O God! You are Peace and from You comes Peace and to You returns Peace. Make us live in Peace, our Lord. Enter us into the Garden by Your Grace and Generosity and Presence. And Your abode is the Abode of Peace. Blessed and lofty are You, O Lord of Majesty and Beauty and Everlastingness, and Greatness and Bounty. O our Lord! O Lord forgive and have mercy, for Yours is the best of Mercy.
If you have trouble with pronouncing the transliteration, feel free to just use the English version since pronouncing the transliterated
dua (supplication to God) as God understands all languages of all His creation.
Honestly though, apart from the
dua (supplication to God) above, give yourself a break, sweetie! You're a human being, not a Heaven's angel! So big deal that you're not succeeding at being forgiving or patient right now! Doesn't mean you won't succeed, just means that right now you're having a little teeny hard time.
Sorry though about your husband taking it out on you, but I'm glad you recognize why he does it. I know it can't be easy, but you can do it!
One moment. One step. One moment and one step at a time, you can do it!
Also, try to concentrate on being here in the present, in the Now, with You, rather than any future, and take deep breaths and medidate about a place which immediately makes you feel peaceful (like beach, forest, hills) and stay there until you feel yourself release the tension inside of you.
Whew!
You're trying your best, and that's what ultimately counts.
Neither raising children is no easy task nor preparing for guests is an easy task: So, go easy on yourself because no need for you to stress out about being stressed out -
lol!
Lol @ your mother.
Take care, sweetie! Just smile: Studies show just the act of smiling, even a forced upburning of the lips, can release feel-good things in brain to make us chemically feel better.
Toodles. Nighty-night!