format_quote Originally Posted by
Search
your unique experience
Assalaamu alaikum Search, Dazed,
Mmm... I wish it were not so, but this exclusion of women from the masaajid is unfortunately not a unique experience. (sigh) In various forms, it's pretty common, in my experience. It's also my experience that women need to
insist on their rights to the mosques. Waiting and hoping for change doesn't work. Being assertive and insisting on your rights and can slowly cause changes.
(smile) Dazed, you are right:
Islam affirms your dignity. But dignity is something within us, Given to us by our Creator and
cannot be taken from us, though others may
try to humiliate us. In the end, it is only our own selves who can humiliate us.
(gently) Standing for an hour in the rain waiting for someone to treat you with respect is not, in my opinion, dignified. (gently) You gave your self-worth to another, you waited for another's approval. In it's own way, this is an idol...
Imagine instead that you looked around as best you could, found everything was locked, and went immediately to the men's section and rapped confidently on the door. When a man came, you could firmly tell him that the women's section was closed, and what could be done about this? Could someone open it? Could you pray behind the brothers (as it was done in the times of the Prophets (SAWS))?. If he rudely slammed the door in your face, you could have rapped again. If no one answered after a reasonable delay, then you could have left immediately, knowing that there was no one of character inside who was worth your time.
(smile) This would have maintained your dignity, would it not? (smile) And certainly you would have been less wet and cold and at risk for catching a cold or worse!
But this time is past. (twinkle) It is so
easy to think of better avenues of reaction to the ones we take while in the thick of action! So don't beat yourself up. But perhaps you could look into what you want as your next step. Are there perhaps other masaajid close to you that you could go to? Do you perhaps have the time and strength to fight this battle for your sisters and brothers in Islam, and work to open this mosque to be more respectful towards women (it isn't easy)? Or perhaps, do you want to avoid mosques completely, and look for Muslims to connect with outside of the present mosque structure... and maybe build your own community over time? Or...
(smile) Whatever you choose, my dear, please always remember that your dignity lies in Pleasing God. No one else. (glow) And that Allah Loves those who seek Him, and Him alone.
May Allah, the Giver of Honour and of Dishonour, Strengthen you with His Light.