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hisnameiszzz
02-21-2016, 09:23 PM
Salaams,

Is there such a thing as Muslim Counselling? If so, does anyone know of any places in the UK that do this either by phone or in person?

I am going through a really awful time in my life and I keep going from bad to worse, and my Iman seems to take a knocking each time. Sometimes I feel so angry. Sometimes I feel so sad. Sometimes I just want to end my life as I do not see things getting any better at all.

I know some of you will be thinking "here he goes again", but I genuinely want to make a positive change to my life but each time I try something, it never seems to happen and then I feel 100 x worse than I did before. At this moment in time, going from day to day is a struggle and I seem to constantly be having panic attacks. I know if my neighbours were not as nasty as they are, I would at least be able to have some relaxing time at home and recuperate but it just isn't possible. I know you will all say it's a test from Allah and that's all good and fine but I hope it ends one day soon because I really am at my limit now.

I ask about Muslim Counselling because I used to have a Christian friend who mentioned a Counselling group at his Church and I was just wondering if there was a Muslim equivalent. I've tried approaching Imams but they do not seem interested in this kind of support.

I thank you all for your time and please make duas for my Mom and my family, and me too.

Jazakallah.
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ardianto
02-21-2016, 10:10 PM
Asslamualaikum my brother.

Not every Imam able to give Islamic counselling, and not every person who able to give Islamic counselling is Imam. I know few Islamic teachers and knowledgeable Muslims in my place who can give good Islamic advice, but they are not masjid Imam.

Try to find someone among Muslims who you know. Do not focus only on masjid Imam.
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MuslimInshallah
02-21-2016, 11:10 PM
Assalaamu alaikum ZZZ,

(smile) This is not one-on-one counselling, but I found it to be very useful in my life. The book's name is Reclaim Your Heart by Yasmin Mogahed. http://www.yasminmogahed.com/reclaim-your-heart/

(smile) My kidlets have returned home, so I must leave you for now. (smile) But this is something worth exploring, and I'll try to get back to you on this.


May Allah, the Kind, Reward you and Enfold you in His Care.
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lonewolf007
02-21-2016, 11:17 PM
http://www.sakoon.co.uk

check it out and maybe get in touch with then you might find it beneficial
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eesa the kiwi
02-22-2016, 03:47 AM
http://www.islamiconlineuniversity.c...ng/counsel.php
these guys offer islamic counselling sessions
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Finding Peace
02-22-2016, 05:07 AM
As salaamu alayk brother,
I don't know any muslim counseling. But you can try talking to a family member or a friend that you trust.
You should try praying qayaam al layl. Maybe Allah will make things easier for you. And make Dua, it's important that you do and we will also make dua for you and your family.
Please brother don't commit suicide. I heard people who do, will feel the pain in the grave until the day of resurrection and you'll go to the hellfire. Allah has blessed you with a life, and yes it was meant for us to struggle and go through trials & tribulations. Don't let your life go to waste. Take this as a test and Pass it. Don't you want to go to paradise? Well then you must remain patient and strong. You must connect with the Quran, it's filled with Allah's words. We all struggle and no one is truly happy in the Dunya. Say Alhamahdillah and ask Allah for guidance. Muhammad (pbuh) said that our iman will go up and down. It won't stay at a high point but it will also drop. We must just stay strong and learn from our mistakes. We all sin, there is no one in the whole world that doesn't sin, no one is perfect, we must learn from our sins and seek refuge from them with Allah (swt).
The ease will come soon. Remain patient. ☺
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hisnameiszzz
02-22-2016, 12:39 PM
Thank you all for your time and your responses. A lot of information on there which I will look through properly when I get time. Thanks also for the links and all the advice. I really appreciate it.

At least I have something to look forward to when I get home tonight.

Originally Posted by Lady of peace
As salaamu alayk brother,
I don't know any muslim counseling. But you can try talking to a family member or a friend that you trust.
You should try praying qayaam al layl. Maybe Allah will make things easier for you. And make Dua, it's important that you do and we will also make dua for you and your family.
Please brother don't commit suicide. I heard people who do, will feel the pain in the grave until the day of resurrection and you'll go to the hellfire. Allah has blessed you with a life, and yes it was meant for us to struggle and go through trials & tribulations. Don't let your life go to waste. Take this as a test and Pass it. Don't you want to go to paradise? Well then you must remain patient and strong. You must connect with the Quran, it's filled with Allah's words. We all struggle and no one is truly happy in the Dunya. Say Alhamahdillah and ask Allah for guidance. Muhammad (pbuh) said that our iman will go up and down. It won't stay at a high point but it will also drop. We must just stay strong and learn from our mistakes. We all sin, there is no one in the whole world that doesn't sin, no one is perfect, we must learn from our sins and seek refuge from them with Allah (swt).
The ease will come soon. Remain patient. ☺
I have tried talking to friends and even family about this, but the response I normally get is be patient, it will get better or just move. If only it was as simple as that. Plus my "men" friends don't really do heart to hearts which is also just as annoying. I've tried going to my GP but again, I feel ashamed and embarrassed when I burst into tears.

I try and think positively which a lot of you have suggested, for example, wanting to get married, getting a new job, just thinking happy and positive thoughts but it gets me nowhere as my life just does not change at all. I even go back in time and think about being young and carefree but that depresses me even more when I think about how my life is now.

As for Paradise, I struggle to get through each day as it is now, so thinking about things like Paradise is not something I do or even think about.

Maybe I am just a complete heathen or an imbecile and maybe that's why my life is so awful. I am trying to look through everything I do and stop doing things which would be classed as sinful, but there is not much I do. I go to work, I come home. I look after my Mother. I do all the cleaning. I go to the Masjid. I pray. I help with the cooking. Yeah, I have to resort to watching stupid documentaries etc on my laptop and listening to music when in bed but that's simply to drown out the noise that the pollutants that live next door torture us with . I don't do crazy things like drugs, alcohol, gambling, adultery etc.

Anyway, I am going on and on. I am a disturbed person I guess. I am so unhappy with my life.

Sorry for boring you all and thanks for listening to me drone on again.
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Finding Peace
02-22-2016, 04:04 PM
Originally Posted by hisnameiszzz
Thank you all for your time and your responses. A lot of information on there which I will look through properly when I get time. Thanks also for the links and all the advice. I really appreciate it.



At least I have something to look forward to when I get home tonight.



I have tried talking to friends and even family about this, but the response I normally get is be patient, it will get better or just move. If only it was as simple as that. Plus my "men" friends don't really do heart to hearts which is also just as annoying. I've tried going to my GP but again, I feel ashamed and embarrassed when I burst into tears.

I try and think positively which a lot of you have suggested, for example, wanting to get married, getting a new job, just thinking happy and positive thoughts but it gets me nowhere as my life just does not change at all. I even go back in time and think about being young and carefree but that depresses me even more when I think about how my life is now.

As for Paradise, I struggle to get through each day as it is now, so thinking about things like Paradise is not something I do or even think about.

Maybe I am just a complete heathen or an imbecile and maybe that's why my life is so awful. I am trying to look through everything I do and stop doing things which would be classed as sinful, but there is not much I do. I go to work, I come home. I look after my Mother. I do all the cleaning. I go to the Masjid. I pray. I help with the cooking. Yeah, I have to resort to watching stupid documentaries etc on my laptop and listening to music when in bed but that's simply to drown out the noise that the pollutants that live next door torture us with . I don't do crazy things like drugs, alcohol, gambling, adultery etc.

Anyway, I am going on and on. I am a disturbed person I guess. I am so unhappy with my life.

Sorry for boring you all and thanks for listening to me drone on again.
As salaam brother,
Don't be embarrassed to shed a tear for the sake of Allah:
(Hell-fire is harâm for a Believer whose eyes shed tears for Allah. The face of a person whose cheek has become wet with a teardrop will never fall on bad times. On the Day of Resurrection, all things will be measured and weighed. Of them, the tears streaming down out of the fear of Allah are strong enough to quench oceans of fire.) [Bayhaqî]
I'm here for you if you want to talk, just message me.
Mashallah brother you do all of that. Just know Allah is proud of you.
If you listen to music, Don't. Music is Haram. If it comforts you, that's not good. Music is shaytaans work, and he uses it to hypnotize the soul. You should stay away from music. Listen to Quran or Nasheeds (with no musical instruments).
You'll get through this. Don't lose hope. Try praying qayaam al layl. Allah see's your pain, stay strong and nag Allah to help you. We'll make dua for you as well. And smile brother. Allah is near. Get closer to him. ☺ Inshallah you can get better.
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hisnameiszzz
02-22-2016, 04:18 PM
Originally Posted by Lady of peace
If you listen to music, Don't. Music is Haram. If it comforts you, that's not good. Music is shaytaans work, and he uses it to hypnotize the soul. You should stay away from music. Listen to Quran or Nasheeds (with no musical instruments).
You'll get through this. Don't lose hope. Try praying qayaam al layl. Allah see's your pain, stay strong and nag Allah to help you. We'll make dua for you as well. And smile brother. Allah is near. Get closer to him. ☺ Inshallah you can get better.
Thanks so much for your kind response. I will try listening to something else but music seems to be the only thing loud enough to drown the door slamming and wardrobe slamming out. If I didn't listen to anything, I would be laid in bed. If a door was slammed, I would get all worked up and have a panic attack. When this happens quite often, it ends up getting me so agitated and that makes it even worse. Sorry, I complain too much I know, but I am not really asking for much. All I want is a bit of peace and quiet. I'm not asking for some posh car, or hot wife or loads of money. I don't need any of that.

What is this QAYAAN AL LAYL you mention. Please could you elaborate?

And thanks so much for your kind words and prayers. I really do need them.
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Finding Peace
02-22-2016, 05:07 PM
Originally Posted by hisnameiszzz
Thanks so much for your kind response. I will try listening to something else but music seems to be the only thing loud enough to drown the door slamming and wardrobe slamming out. If I didn't listen to anything, I would be laid in bed. If a door was slammed, I would get all worked up and have a panic attack. When this happens quite often, it ends up getting me so agitated and that makes it even worse. Sorry, I complain too much I know, but I am not really asking for much. All I want is a bit of peace and quiet. I'm not asking for some posh car, or hot wife or loads of money. I don't need any of that.

What is this QAYAAN AL LAYL you mention. Please could you elaborate?

And thanks so much for your kind words and prayers. I really do need them.
Your welcome brother,
And I advice you to try not to listen to music. Listen to Quran and you'll even get rewarded for listening to it. May Allah (swt) help through this. I know how you feel, but nag Allah about what you want and tell him Alhamdiallah, for what you have blessed me with, but O Allah could you bless me with this... remember Allah is listening and He's waiting for you to go nearer to him.

And "Qiyaam al-layl is Sunnah mu’akkadah (a confirmed Sunnah). Many texts of the Qur’aan and Sunnah encourage it and speak of its high status and great reward. Qiyaam al-layl plays a great role in strengthening one's faith and helping one to do good deeds." ☺
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hisnameiszzz
02-22-2016, 07:06 PM
Originally Posted by Lady of peace
May Allah (swt) help through this. I know how you feel, but nag Allah about what you want and tell him Alhamdiallah, for what you have blessed me with, but O Allah could you bless me with this... remember Allah is listening and He's waiting for you to go nearer to him.

And "Qiyaam al-layl is Sunnah mu’akkadah (a confirmed Sunnah). Many texts of the Qur’aan and Sunnah encourage it and speak of its high status and great reward. Qiyaam al-layl plays a great role in strengthening one's faith and helping one to do good deeds." ☺
Am I allowed to nag Him? I wasn't aware of that? Maybe that's the new approach I will use. Tonight I shall beg and nag! :p

Absolutely, I always thank him and am grateful for what I have. I thank him for allowing me to breathe, have eyes that work, a body that works, a family, a house etc. I know there are loads of people that go without any of these basic needs and I feel bad when I moan. I probably come across like a right grumbly guts but this is what the torture from next door does to you.

Can I just ask, do any of you get angry with Allah/God or whoever you believe in when you ask and beg but it never happens or are you all quite happy with what you have and wait patiently?

Thanks again.

PS. I see you were talking about Tahajud, the name you mentioned totally baffled me. Oooops.
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~ Sabr ~
03-14-2016, 03:48 PM
http://www.sakoon.co.uk/

http://www.islamiccounselling.co.uk/
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BeTheChange
03-14-2016, 07:54 PM
Walaikumasalaam,

An excellent charity is called Muslim Youth Helpline.

Visit them using http://www.myh.org.uk/ or dial 0808 808 2008.

You can also visit their website for a live chat in sha Allah.
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BeTheChange
03-14-2016, 08:03 PM
Asalamualykum,

Just coming back to your question.

I can ask the sisters i know to see if they can ask the imaams to have a chat with you?

You don't need to disclose any personal information but am sure the imaam will be more than happy to talk to you in sha Allah.
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