I don't feel Allah's presense

[lostsoul2016]

Salam brothers and sisters.
I know this is very bad and sounds weird perhaps.

it has indeed been a long time since I have prayed. However I still give my thanks to Allah for many many things he has granted me in this life. I always think of Allah.
Because of unfortunate hardships recently I feel that Allah has left me/closed the door on me and I do blame myself.

Yesterday I prayed tahajjud after midnight. I repented, I begged and ask for forgiveness from Allah for all my bad sins. I prayed for this world to come together and to make all Muslims safe from evil and to get rid of any and all shaytans, especially from me. I promised to Allah I will never do the wrong doings I had done and feel so remorseful and ashamed.

Even when I want to bed and just saying "Allah akbar" and going to sleep, I still felt nothing. Even right now, I feel nothing. I am so down and depressed (and have been for a while). I feel like Allah does not care for me or want me (and I don't blame him either).

Brothers and sisters, what do I do? I feel so alone.

[Serinity]

:salam:

Know that as long as you are alive, the door to Allah SWT is always open. Remember, Allah SWT never closes the door upon us, we close it, and if we refuse etc. for a long time, Allah SWT will seal our hearts - but do not despair, turn to Allah SWT and Allah SWT will turn to you.

May Allah SWT forgive me if I said anything wrong. Ameen.

And Allah SWT knows best.

[Scimitar]

Salam brothers and sisters.
I know this is very bad and sounds weird perhaps.

it has indeed been a long time since I have prayed. However I still give my thanks to Allah for many many things he has granted me in this life. I always think of Allah.
Because of unfortunate hardships recently I feel that Allah has left me/closed the door on me and I do blame myself.

Yesterday I prayed tahajjud after midnight. I repented, I begged and ask for forgiveness from Allah for all my bad sins. I prayed for this world to come together and to make all Muslims safe from evil and to get rid of any and all shaytans, especially from me. I promised to Allah I will never do the wrong doings I had done and feel so remorseful and ashamed.

Even when I want to bed and just saying "Allah akbar" and going to sleep, I still felt nothing. Even right now, I feel nothing. I am so down and depressed (and have been for a while). I feel like Allah does not care for me or want me (and I don't blame him either).

Brothers and sisters, what do I do? I feel so alone.

You don't feel Allah's presence?

You've entered your TESTING phase.

Work on it

Scimi

[lostsoul2016]

What do you mean by work on it?
I always did feel his presence but only up until 2 weeks ago.... :(

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[Scimitar]

Enter sujood in the dead of night, and ask Allah to forgive you. (tahajjud)

Ramadhan is coming,

Scimi

[EgyptPrincess]

Even when I want to bed and just saying "Allah akbar" and going to sleep, I still felt nothing. Even right now, I feel nothing. I am so down and depressed (and have been for a while). I feel like Allah does not care for me or want me (and I don't blame him either).

Brothers and sisters, what do I do? I feel so alone.

I know how you feel brother, I am experiencing this very issue right now and it's painful to feel this. I would never wish the feeling of Allah's absence on any brother or sister :(

[greenhill]

I think feel is overrated.

'Know' is all important.

I know I will die. And I know I don't know what happens after; except for what I believe from the myriad of info out there. Ponder, consider, reason, etc (as even the Quran asks us to) still at the end of the day it still can be 50/50, then I read a question, "Do you think this (the world) is all created in play?" What can I say? That it is all chance? That tilted it for me.

If you have felt His Presence before, consider that a privilege. I have never (that I know) felt a moment of anything with Allah. But that means my 'lot' is only known to Him. does not change the fact that Allah is Akbar, the Ahad. The Best Disperser of Affairs. As such, I'm in no position to bargain what He has Ordained. just to do (what is right under every circumstance, moment, situation, ... ) But, there are always exceptions. Allah is Most Fair. Prime example, the Hajj (if able).

In short, feel Him, don't feel Him, your choices should, sorry, must be constant. Then, you are in syaa Allah, amongst the 'rightly' guided.

:peace:

[sister herb]

Because of unfortunate hardships recently I feel that Allah has left me/closed the door on me and I do blame myself.

This is a thing what puts me wonder everytimes I hear kind of words. When we have some good happenings in our life, we remember to thank Allah because of this good thing happened (as a gift from Allah). But why we don´t trust to Allah, His love and guidance at the times of sadness as it´s the moment when we need the most our faith to survive to tomorrow? Why we just then feel like our faith is weak, Allah doesn´t care us or He hates us? We should trust to Him and trust that there is some reason behind of every hard times as well that only with His help we will solve our problems?

But why we then feel like we lost our faith and turn our back to our the greatest helper?

[whosebob]

It is a test. I have schizophrenia and it is hard for me to feel emotions. At first I thought that Allah does'nt love me as well but I kept on praying. Sometimes I failed but Allah guided me back mashallah. Now and again I do feel nice in salah Alhamdullilah. It is worth the wait mashallah. Keep at your ibaadah inshallah. Like Greehill sais sometimes knowing is more important than feeling. If you don't have the strength then do just the Fards inshallah. Later when you have the strength then continue making the Sunnah salahs inshallah. Sometimes Allah removes love from our hearts to see how we will behave without it. That's why I recommend you start a diary about the Good moments in your life so that you don't forget the blessings Allah has given you inshallah. Make a shuckran list, make duaa for believers in your life, write to Allah inshallah. Remember it must be positive topics you speak to Allah about. This way you are reinforcing a positive attitude inshallah. Psychologist use this technique all the time inshallah. Sometimes it can also be medical. If you feeling depressed then maybe you need medication inshallah.

Inshallah, I hope you get better. May Allah guide you.

[Scimitar]

Imaan goes up, goes down - it's a balancing act - anyone who thinks they have spades of imaan is only fooling themselves.

Imaan is not judged by the individual regarding him or her self - it is judged by God.

You can only do what is right, and hope that your intentions were worthy of God's mercy.

As Shaikh Greenhill said, it's not about what you feel - it's about what you know.

Scimi

[Insaanah]

:salam:

There is a hadeeth called the hadeeth of Jibreel :as: . In it, the Prophet :saws: said: (as part of a very much longer hadeeth)"...Fear Allah as if you are seeing Him, and though you see Him not, verily He is seeing you."

http://www.sunnah.com/muslim/1/7

Similarly, if you do not feel, know that verily He is aware of you, seeing you, listening to you.

How many unfortunate people worship and pray to that which does not see, hear, or cannot help even if it did?

Those whose faiths lacks firm foundation, they rely on feelings to reassure them. With Muslims, Allah says repeatedly in the Qur'an, "Know that....", and this has been mentioned above by others.

May Allah always be with you, and guide you, and keep you and us all firm and steadfast, and may we all incur His love and pleasure, ameen.

[*charisma*]

Even when I want to bed and just saying "Allah akbar" and going to sleep, I still felt nothing. Even right now, I feel nothing. I am so down and depressed (and have been for a while). I feel like Allah does not care for me or want me (and I don't blame him either).

Brothers and sisters, what do I do? I feel so alone.

The feeling you got to pray in the first place is Allah bringing you closer to Him. Had He deserted you, indeed you'd be lost and had never felt the feelings of regret in the first place. What other type of feeling would have let you feel that Allah is present? You know He's there, so I'm just wondering.

[lostsoul2016]

Thank you everybody for your nice responses.

I guess the feeling I would get is... i don't know, the warmth? the feeling inside (fuzzy)? a bit of happiness maybe? Just something from within that feels he is there and listening or understanding me.

[noraina]

Assalamu alaykum,

Keep up your ibadat as I'm sure you are, no matter how weak our iman may become, worship and most importantly salah is the one thing we *must* do, hang onto it like anything as that is mankind's means of communication with their Creator. As has already been said, definitely wake up for tahajjud and prostrate to Allah swt when the whole world is asleep - when you start doing this regularly, there are no words to describe how beautiful it is.

And, this 'feeling' of distance is coming from us. We can, sometimes, unintentionally surround our heart and soul with barriers, and these mean we find difficultly in gaining khushoo or striving for ihsan in our worship. Allah swt is closer to us than our jugular vein, so He's always there, transcendent and immanent, just at times we ourselves move away.

It isn't about feeling His presence, as much as having that awareness that Allah swt is there when no-one else is, watching over you, protecting you, forgiving you the moment you repent - sometimes when that awareness decreases you can feel really lost, so make abundant duas and press on. :)

[*charisma*]

You neglected one of the most important obligations in Islam. Just Bro Timi Scar said, this is your test. You expected to feel something simply after one night of ibaadah, where is your humbleness :D I don't mean this in any bad way brother, forgive me if I sound condescending, but what I mean is in one night Allah brought you to Him and you prayed and felt regret and sadness in your heart, but at the same time why did you feel one salaah was enough?

Imagine this scenario, a man works for his boss. The boss gives the man packages to deliver to the next city. These packages are very important and if they are not delivered on time, the man will not get paid. One day the man takes the packages and throws them away. His boss finds out and thinks maybe his worker is just having a bad day, so he forgives him, but doesn't pay him because of what he did. Once again, the man neglects his duty and throws the packages away. He repeats this again and again. Eventually his boss fires him. So now the man is jobless. He sees that his boss hired someone else to do the work, and this man is getting paid really well. The man decides he wants to work again so he can also be successful. He goes back to his boss and begs to be forgiven. His boss tells him that he has to prove that he can be a good worker, but the man knows he can't ever bring back and redeliver the packages he threw away. He asks his boss what he can do to prove it, and his boss tells him that he has to work for free to make up for all the packages he threw away. The man works for just one day and asks for his job back, and the boss says no. The man feels he has no passion for his job anyways and that he has done enough work for his boss and that his boss should have forgiven him when he first apologized. He can't figure out why his boss just can't trust him and allow him to be a regular employee again.

Allah is giving you a chance by bringing you back to Him. Now you have to put in the work to stay there. I'm not here to judge, but one night of remorse followed by a day of entitlement doesn't add up. The warm fuzzy feeling comes when your heart has been purified of it's sins and you have achieved a strong sense of taqwa to never stray away from Allah again. That's happiness, being strong enough to do the right thing when everything else is trying to make you neglect your duties or fall into sin.

You want that feeling right away especially after having neglected your salaah, while the righteous are worried that Allah has not accepted their deeds and they pray every salaah on time. Subhanallah..

[lostsoul2016]

Thank you.

no no, i completely understand what you are saying and do not expect after 1 prayer i expect everything - not the case at all. i don't know, i just feel.... not "me" and just lost (and frightful of course of Allah)

[*charisma*]

May Allah make things easy on you brother, I think that you are on the path to become better inshallah, just don't rush things..do what you have to do and inshallah everything will fall in place :D

[Scimitar]

Thank you everybody for your nice responses.

I guess the feeling I would get is... i don't know, the warmth? the feeling inside (fuzzy)? a bit of happiness maybe? Just something from within that feels he is there and listening or understanding me.

I never got this warmth feeling of fuzziness... meh.

To my knowledge this is the first i'm hearing of it. Is it a necessity for imaan? I highly doubt it... Allahu Alam

Scimi

[*charisma*]

@Timi Scar I only feel a really strong sense of trust and contentment. That no matter what happens, I'm cool with it, and I trust in Allah that it will get better inshallah. Not sure what everyone else feels lol.

[Scimitar]

i'm in between hope and fear - the transcendent nature of Allahs mercy is in between those two - this is my proof for God, it's highly personal.

Scimi

[popsthebuilder]

Have patience, perseverance, and faith friend. You are aware of something you knowingly neglected. But you are headed in a better direction now it seems. Your conscience is eating you up it seems, and though it is painful, it is a blessing. Think how lost you would be with no shame, remorse, or knowledge of what you did or didn't do.

The conscience, being put overly simple, is similar to nerves and physical pain. If you cause damage to your flesh then your nerves send a signal of pain to your brain in an effort to make you change what you are doing for your bodies sake. The conscience works the same for spiritual direction.

I believe there to be much more to it than that, but I'm just describing it in a simple way for reference. If you have truly repented then be patient with Faith that GOD knows your heart. This test could go on until you physically die. Are you prepared for this emptiness? This loss of feeling? Be still. You have shame, now have hope.

Patience, perseverance,
Faith.

Remember and keep what you know close at all times.

I wish you the best.

humbly,
Peace

[popsthebuilder]

This may not be an appropriate place for this but;

I am delighted by the wealth of quality advice and genuine consern people have shone on this singular thread. It is quite telling.

May GOD bring all to His will for our sake, and the sake of all.

All praise, thanks, and suplication and submission is to GOD with Faith and fear.

Peace