format_quote Originally Posted by
anonymous
Salam
I llike a boy n we want t marry....but there r so many hurdles from his side....his parents wants him t settle....hes already doing job but his parents wont agree....i m already 27......my parents r pressurizing me......i m in so much stress....cry all time.....n secondly he becomes so distant.....coldheart suddenly..sometimes i feel dat i m talking t wall...didnt talk t me much.......plz can somebody tell me dua or wazifa for my problems?
Asalaamu Alaikum,
My sister it is not about finding a wazifa. Firstly as you know relations outside of marriage are forbidden and we all know too well the reasons why. Firstly a non mahram man and a woman are not allowed to interact particularly when it comes to physcial relations.
Narrated by Umar ibn al-Khattab, Messenger of Allaah {Sallallahu Alayhi Wa Sallam} said: "Whenever a man is alone with a woman shaytan makes a third."
[Al-Tirmidhi 3118]
Ma’qil ibn Yassaar said narrated that the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said: “For one of you to be stabbed in the head with an iron needle is better for him than that he should touch a woman who is not permissible for him.”
(al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer)
There is no blessings in relations outside of marriage. For you are only incurring major sins whilst you are in such a relationship.
Secondly the signs are already there that this relationship is not working in the way he becomes cold towards you and is dragging marriage. Any serious man who wants to marry would not delay in doing so. Particularly if it is resulting in such major sins being incurred. Therefore you must get out of such a relationship immediately for you are not only getting major sin and displeasing and angering Allah but you are also wasting your time when time is ticking for you to get married.
So my sister you know what the right thing is to do in such a situation. Make Isthikhara and if you are inclined to marry him then give him an an ultamatum that either he marries you immediately or you will cut off all contact.
This is the reason why such relationships outside marriage are forbidden because they result in those involved getting hurt and scarred due to things going wrong and many of these relationships do not even make it to marriage. They also result in one getting led on and used and abused. Once the guy/girl has gotten what they want they are not interested anymore or they never were in the first place but use marriage as a tool to get what they want.
So my sistewr do not waste any more of your time as we have not got time to waste in our lives. Make ishtikhara and ask of Allah and give him an ultamatum. Or iof you decide he is not the one then cut off all contact with him and look for a good pious brother who will not mess you around and who is serious about getting married.