Feeling remorse for crimes against Allah, oneself and others is what undoes the knots of shaytaan from the brain.
We definitely need to save that which pleases Allah as useful and save that which displeases Allah as a malware definition so that we immediately become cosy when faced with the tayyib and feel a gut-wrenching quiver when faced with the haraam.
we also want to pass on the good traits to our offspring who will find it easier to walk straight inshaAllah since noble traits are passed on to a certain extent and so are evil traits.
There's Qadr and then there's effort, signs of this are displayed within our tiny life cycle:
We need to focus on the effort since that's where we can make a difference - and trust that Allah will set the factors out of our control right.
We are all subject to Allah whether we willingly accept that or not and we are in need of His grace despite all of our best efforts, and our efforts in trying to walk along the path which pleases Allah helps in bringing that grace and guidance nearer.
No person is immune from stumbles brother, not even our father Adam (pbuh), best thing to do is try one's best to return to that which pleases Allah and avoid that which displeases Him to the best of one's ability - Allah is well aware of each person's circumstances and will certainly judge with justice.
Here are some dua which should help if we comprehend the meaning when saying them:
اللَّهُمَ اِنَّا نَسْتَعِيْنُكَ وَ نَسْتَغْفِرُكَ وَ نؤمِنُ بِكَ وَ نَتَوَكَّلُ عَلَيْكَ وَ نُثْنِىْ عَلَيْكَ الْخَيْرَ وَ نَشْكُرُكَ وَ لَا نَكْفُرُكَ وَ نَخُلَعُ وَ نَتْرُكُ مَنْ يّفْجُرُكَ. اللَّهُمَّ اِيَّاكَ نَعْبُدُ وَ لَكَ نُصَلِّىْ وَ نَسْجُدُ وَ اِلَيْكَ نَسْعٰى وَ نَحْفِدُ وَ نَرْجُوْا رَحْمَتَكَ وَ نَخْشٰى عَذَابَكَ اِنَّ عَذَابَكَ بِالْكُفَّارِ مُلْحِقٌ
Allahumma inna nasta'inuka wa nastaghfiruka, wa nu'minu bika, wa natawwakkalu alayika, wa nusni alayikal khaira, wa nashkuruka wa la nakforuka wa nakhla'u wa natruku manyafjoruk. Allahumma iyyaka na'budu wa laka nusalli wa nasjudu wa ilayika nasa wa nahfidu, wa narju Rahmataka wa nakhsha 'adhzabaka; inna adhabaka al-jidda bi al-kuffari mulhiq
O Allah! We seek Your assistance and ask for Your guidance, and we beseech Your forgiveness and return to You in repentance. We cherish faith in You and place our trust in You. We attribute all goodness to You. We are grateful to You and refuse to be ungrateful to You. We abandon and forsake all those who reject You. O Allah, You alone we worship, unto You alone we pray; unto You alone we prostrate, and for You alone we strive. Unto You alone we flee for refuge. We cherish hope in Your mercy and we fear Your retribution. Verily, Your punishment is bound to catch up with those who reject the truth.
اللَّهُمَّ اهْدِنِي فِيمَنْ هَدَيْت، وَعَافِنِي فِيِمَنْ عَافَيْتَ، وَتَوَلَّنِي فِمَنْ تَوَلَّيْتَ، وَبَارِكْ لِي فِيمَا أعْطَيْتَ، وَقِنِي شَرَّ مَا قَضَيْتَ، فَإنَّكَ تَقْضِي وَلا يُقْضَى عَلَيْكَ، إنَّهُ لا يَذِلُّ مَنْ وَالَيْتَ، [َوَلا يَعِزُّ مَنْ عَادَيْتَ]، تَبَارَكْتَ رَبَّنَا وَ تَعَالَيْتَ
Allahumm-ahdinii fiman hadait, wa 'afini fiman 'aafait, wa tawallani fiman tawwallait, wa barik li fima a'atait, wa qini sharra ma qadaiyta, fainnaka taqdhi wa la yuqdha 'alaika, innahu la yadhillu man walaiyt, [wa la yai'izzu man 'aadait] tabarakta Rabbana wa ta'aalaita
O Allah! Guide me with those whom You have Guided, and strengthen me with those whom You have given strength, take me to Your care with those whom You have taken to Your care, Bless me in what You have given me, Proptect me from the evil You have Ordained. Surely You Command and are not commanded, and non whom You have committed to Your care shall be humiliated [and non whom You have Taken as an enemy shall taste glory]. You are Blessed, our Lord, and Exhalted.
Translation of Du'a al Qunoot
Allahumma inna nasta'inuka wa nastaghfiruka, wa nu'minu bika wa natawakkalu 'alaika wa nuthni 'alaikal khair, wa nashkuruka wa la nakfuruka wa nakhla'u wa natruka manyyafjuruka, allahumma iyyaka na'budu , wa laka nusalli wa nasjudu wa ilaika nas'a wa nahfidu wa narju rahmataka wa nakhsha 'adhabaka inna 'adhabaka bil kaffari mulhiq.
عن أبي عبد الرحمن قال : علمنا ابن مسعود أن نقرأ في القنوت : اللهم إنا نستعينك ونستغفرك ونؤمن بك ونثني عليك الخير ولا نكفرك ونخلع ونترك من يفجرك اللهم إياك نعبد ولك نصلي ونسجد وإليك نسعى ونحفد ونرجو رحمتك ونخشى عذابك إن عذابك الجد بالكفار ملحق . 1
Slight variants of this du`a occur in other parts of the Musannaf as well (e.g. in the Book of Du`a and section on what to make du`a by in the qunut of Fajr
It was narrated that ‘Umar prayed Qunoot with the following words:
“O’ Allah! We implore You for help and beg forgiveness of You and believe in You and rely on You and extol You
and we are thankful to You and are not ungrateful to You
and we alienate and forsake those who disobey You.
O’ Allah! You alone do we worship and for You do we pray and prostrate
and we betake to please You and present ourselves for the service in Your cause
And we hope for Your mercy and fear Your chastisement.
Undoubtedly, Your torment is going to overtake infidels”
(Narrated by al-Bayhaqi, 2/210; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in al-Irwa’, 2/170)
May the creator guide us all.