I'M TIRED OF IT

[Aaqib]

I know it seems like I'm really overreacting but I'm not!

THIS HAS BEEN LIKE THE 5TH TIME I'VE TIRED TO GET MY BROTHER TO PRAY WITH ME

EVERYTIME, HE DISTRACTS ME, DOES WHAT I TELL HIM NOT TO DO AND I'M TIRED OF IT

I DON'T THINK I CAN PRAY WITH AN OPEN MIND WHEN I PRAY WITH HIM, HE IS ALWAYS DISTRACTING.

Seriously, where is some advice? I'm tired of it, he's always distracting me during the prayer and he is such a nuisance when I ask him to review through the prayer on what to do. How can I attain khushoo with him distracting me in the prayer?

[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

How old is this brother of yours? Is he doing it on purpose or out of ignorance?

Think of it as training. If you can manage to attain Khushoo` despite distractions, you'll be able to have Khushoo` at any time.

[Aaqib]

How old is this brother of yours? Is he doing it on purpose or out of ignorance?

Think of it as training. If you can manage to attain Khushoo` despite distractions, you'll be able to have Khushoo` at any time.

Yes, it is out of pure ignorance. I tell him to stop doing it before the prayer, yet he still does it.

But how? I don't want to risk my prayers being thrown back at me...

[Aaqib]

He's 10.

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[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

One solution is to make your Salaah in a separate room, and perhaps lock the door until you are complete. That way there won't be any distractions.

[Aaqib]

One solution is to make your Salaah in a separate room, and perhaps lock the door until you are complete. That way there won't be any distractions.

He doesn't know much about the prayer, so he needs to see me.

[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

In that case, you will get an additional reward for making Sabr with him and having perform the Salaah with you, because by doing so, you are teaching him. So you will be getting the Thawaab (reward) for making Salaah, the reward for teaching someone else how to do the same, and of course, the reward for making Sabr despite the distractions. Three-fold reward for letting him make Salaah along with you.

[Kiro]

Hold your hand his head and see how long he lasts, how long he can stay still and tell him it's a game.

[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

Maybe give him some kind of reward if he stands still. An incentive to behave.

[Little_Lion]

Try using a point system: for every time he completes his prayer without being a distraction, he gets a point. Get in on this with your parents and add other things to it, like doing chores, eating veggies, sitting still for recitation, whatever he has trouble with. He can turn in his points to get a reward, like, 50 points would get him a candy bar. 300 points could earn him a trip to the movies (or 500, or whatever is fair economically near you). There's lots of suggestions on parents sites for things like this.

Of course, his real reward is that he will learn how to come closer to Allah, but that can be hard to explain to a 10 year old sometimes. ;)

[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

That's a very good idea.

(50 points for a chocolate is a bit steep, though. Go easier on him..)

[Umm Abed]

He doesn't know much about the prayer, so he needs to see me.

Please be patient with him, he's learning.

In which way does he distract you, if I may ask?

[aaj]

What lot of Muslims do is that they command their kids to do something because "they said so". It goes the same with salah and hijab and other things. What is lacking in most cases is the education. Muslims focus on the action of doing rather then the reasoning behind it. I think it' s important to give him dawah about what is salah, history of salah, origin of salah, rewards and punishment of salah, how to do salah ,etc. Educate him first and then supervise him performing it first. Once you feel confident he can do it on his own then have him join you. If he doesn't listen then you can discipline him, as the hadith goes : +

"“Teach your children to pray when they are seven years old, and smack them (lightly) if they do not pray when they are 10 years old..."

https://islamqa.info/en/127233

[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

Note: "Smacking" here does not refer to the face. It is not permissible to strike a Muslim - child or adult - in his or her face.

[crimsontide06]

10?? The best advice I can give is to be patient. Maybe help him understand what is said during prayer, why you pray and the importance of being close to God. That way the adherence to it will come more naturally.

He's 10.