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Zeal
10-29-2016, 11:54 AM
Assalamu 'alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,


I feel as though nothing really matters anymore in my life. I have goals and I have friends but I don't know maybe it's just that I'm ill but I feel like I don't care about anything dunyah-wise anymore. I don't feel like socialising because it's too much energy or have any real hobbies yet. I'm not sure of what I should do and if it's even ok to carry on like this...

Tbh I feel like this is very bad attitude to have but what can I do... how do I change it?
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anatolian
10-29-2016, 12:56 PM
If your love is for the sinfull portion yes it is a bad thing but if it is for the halal portion of the world you must love the world. It gives us everything we need to have a life. Just imagine you support me food when I am hungry but I don't love you. This would be hypocricy
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drac16
10-29-2016, 01:31 PM
Wa alaykum salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

Sometimes I feel like that. You don`t have to enjoy social activities. You sound like you`re an introvert; I`m an introvert, too. Being around other people drains me and it takes a lot of effort for me to come out of my shell. There`s nothing wrong with being introverted-- it`s completely normal. If you live near any forests, rivers, lakes or waterfalls, go there for a walk. Nature is very relaxing.
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Nobody's Girl
10-29-2016, 01:54 PM
I don't know much about loving this world. But it sounds to me as if you have depression. You said you don't like socializing but you have friends. If you have always been like this you might be an introvert if not than it's most likely depression.

Don't worry just reach out to someone you trust. Nothing is worst than being abandoned.

You are in my thoughts and prayers.
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Zeal
10-29-2016, 03:03 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by anatolian
If your love is for the sinfull portion yes it is a bad thing but if it is for the halal portion of the world you must love the world. It gives us everything we need to have a life. Just imagine you support me food when I am hungry but I don't love you. This would be hypocricy
I love fighting but that's haram basically but
I appreciate the food and alhumdulillah alaa kulli haal! I also love Allah

I don't think it makes me a hypocrite for not loving things in the dunya surely there must be things you hate and did the prophet (saw) not dislike garlic?



format_quote Originally Posted by Nobody's Girl
I don't know much about loving this world. But it sounds to me as if you have depression. You said you don't like socializing but you have friends. If you have always been like this you might be an introvert if not than it's most likely depression.

Don't worry just reach out to someone you trust. Nothing is worst than being abandoned.

You are in my thoughts and prayers.
I'm actually an extrovert I used to like socialising but I'm ill now so can't harness the willpower to do stuff or if I do I'm so slow and ngl when I realised that it was kind of depressing.


And jzkk that really means alot to me you too are in my dua

format_quote Originally Posted by drac16
Wa alaykum salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

Sometimes I feel like that. You don`t have to enjoy social activities. You sound like you`re an introvert; I`m an introvert, too. Being around other people drains me and it takes a lot of effort for me to come out of my shell. There`s nothing wrong with being introverted-- it`s completely normal. If you live near any forests, rivers, lakes or waterfalls, go there for a walk. Nature is very relaxing.
Im more of the go out and jog 5miles type but lately iv been feelin drained
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Delete.
10-29-2016, 03:26 PM
Wa alaykum a'salam wa rahmat Allahi wa barakatuhu

So there's a difference between love for things in the dunya (money, food, etc.) and having love for your life in the dunya. I assume you are talking about the latter because you said you are unmotivated and nothing matters to you anymore. So here are a few things to ponder about..

Will the goals you have help you in Akhira? Or are they solely for the purpose of dunya? Because if achieving these goals will only benefit you in dunya, maybe this could be why you feel that nothing matters, and you know better than me. Set some goals that will benefit you in the dunya and in your Akhira, and in sha Allah you will feel more motivated to work towards them because your prize will be Jannah, in sha Allah.

Are your friends those who remind you of Allah when you are with them? Or do you spend your time with them doing idle talks? Spend your time with people who remember Allah often, and who you can benefit from. I am not saying that each moment you are with them you are reciting Qur'an, or discussing the Deen, but even the people you do normal activities with (bowling, sport, etc.) they should be people who remind you of Allah, when you go out with them they don't cause fitna for you.

I don't want to give you specifics like doing sport, etc. because I don't know your situation exactly. For me, my perspective and attitude towards the dunya changed tremendously when I started to study the Deen, Alhamdulilah, and I think it is the best way for anyone to cope with our time here.

I probably didn't help too much, but I do pray it helped a little bit. Allah knows best.
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crimsontide06
10-29-2016, 06:52 PM
I understand I feel the same way...more so than you. I have no friends or goals in life. My goal is jannah. I love my family, but other than family...nothing else in life really matters since this life is just an illusion, the afterlife is the real life. While it feeds into my loneliness and depression, sitting at home the rest of my life doesn't sound like a bad idea...I feel like, everything will be fine as long as I have family and as long as I pray, fast in Ramadan, and read Quran.

format_quote Originally Posted by Zeal
Assalamu 'alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,


I feel as though nothing really matters anymore in my life. I have goals and I have friends but I don't know maybe it's just that I'm ill but I feel like I don't care about anything dunyah-wise anymore. I don't feel like socialising because it's too much energy or have any real hobbies yet. I'm not sure of what I should do and if it's even ok to carry on like this...

Tbh I feel like this is very bad attitude to have but what can I do... how do I change it?
Reply

Zeal
10-29-2016, 07:26 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by ___
Wa alaykum a'salam wa rahmat Allahi wa barakatuhu

So there's a difference between love for things in the dunya (money, food, etc.) and having love for your life in the dunya. I assume you are talking about the latter because you said you are unmotivated and nothing matters to you anymore. So here are a few things to ponder about..

Will the goals you have help you in Akhira? Or are they solely for the purpose of dunya? Because if achieving these goals will only benefit you in dunya, maybe this could be why you feel that nothing matters, and you know better than me. Set some goals that will benefit you in the dunya and in your Akhira, and in sha Allah you will feel more motivated to work towards them because your prize will be Jannah, in sha Allah.

Are your friends those who remind you of Allah when you are with them? Or do you spend your time with them doing idle talks? Spend your time with people who remember Allah often, and who you can benefit from. I am not saying that each moment you are with them you are reciting Qur'an, or discussing the Deen, but even the people you do normal activities with (bowling, sport, etc.) they should be people who remind you of Allah, when you go out with them they don't cause fitna for you.

I don't want to give you specifics like doing sport, etc. because I don't know your situation exactly. For me, my perspective and attitude towards the dunya changed tremendously when I started to study the Deen, Alhamdulilah, and I think it is the best way for anyone to cope with our time here.

I probably didn't help too much, but I do pray it helped a little bit. Allah knows best.
No Allahumma barik that was actually golden advice. You would have laughed if you had seen the amount of times I wrote something and figured out the answer straight after so thanks for that!

Anyways, my goals are akhira related but the thing I spend alot of my time on doesn't feel so much(education) plus there aren't many muslim men let alone men on the course and I think that's having an affect on me but I'm basically becoming a doctor for a mainly specific type of patient. It can be very demanding of you and sometimes when you look at huge books of biology you can actually forget about Allah and the 'ajr one may gain from this

I need to remind myself more often of why I am doing this course and not to let the fitnah get to my head.

Tbh this wasn't what I was looking for, though I don't know what it is I'm looking for but it was still really helpful jzkk.
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Delete.
10-29-2016, 07:38 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Zeal
No Allahumma barik that was actually golden advice. You would have laughed if you had seen the amount of times I wrote something and figured out the answer straight after so thanks for that!

Anyways, my goals are akhira related but the thing I spend alot of my time on doesn't feel so much(education) plus there aren't many muslim men let alone men on the course and I think that's having an affect on me but I'm basically becoming a doctor for a mainly specific type of patient. It can be very demanding of you and sometimes when you look at huge books of biology you can actually forget about Allah and the 'ajr one may gain from this

I need to remind myself more often of why I am doing this course and not to let the fitnah get to my head.

Tbh this wasn't what I was looking for, though I don't know what it is I'm looking for but it was still really helpful jzkk.
May Allah make it easy for you, brother.
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Nobody's Girl
10-29-2016, 10:58 PM
If you are certain that you are an extrovert. I really think this might be depression. Has something really painful happened in your life?
Or maybe you're just a little jaded by life.
I guess most people have felt like this at one point in their lives. Maybe you just need sometime alone. If you need any help. I am right here. I just wanted to thank you for replying to my thread.

All the best :)
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Zeal
10-30-2016, 05:20 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Nobody's Girl
If you are certain that you are an extrovert. I really think this might be depression. Has something really painful happened in your life?
Or maybe you're just a little jaded by life.
I guess most people have felt like this at one point in their lives. Maybe you just need sometime alone. If you need any help. I am right here. I just wanted to thank you for replying to my thread.

All the best :)
Thank you and you're very welcome

You're right maybe I do just need some alone time, a little break
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anatolian
10-30-2016, 07:32 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Zeal
I love fighting but that's haram basically but
I appreciate the food and alhumdulillah alaa kulli haal! I also love Allah

I don't think it makes me a hypocrite for not loving things in the dunya surely there must be things you hate and did the prophet (saw) not dislike garlic?
Salam bro. I dont say that you must love everything in this World. You may love garlic or dislike it, it is up to you. However, ı am sure there are many things in this world which are halal and you enjoy. Love this World for these. No need to have a depressed life.

Havent you heard this hadith? "Work for this World as if you will never die and work for your akhira as if you will die tomorrow"
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Zeal
10-30-2016, 08:26 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by anatolian
Salam bro. I dont say that you must love everything in this World. You may love garlic or dislike it, it is up to you. However, ı am sure there are many things in this world which are halal and you enjoy. Love this World for these. No need to have a depressed life.

Havent you heard this hadith? "Work for this World as if you will never die and work for your akhira as if you will die tomorrow"
Erm what's the reference for that hadith?

Never heard of it before...

But I get what your saying and yeah sure there are things that give you that 1 second thrill you really enjoy but nothing I really have a passion for
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anatolian
10-31-2016, 06:57 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Zeal
Erm what's the reference for that hadith?

Never heard of it before...

But I get what your saying and yeah sure there are things that give you that 1 second thrill you really enjoy but nothing I really have a passion for
It is a famous saying known as hadith but I have checked it's autenticy after your warning and it seems it is not a hadith but a saying attributed to Ali (r.a.)

However there are hadithes in the book of Kanz al-Ummal which have similar meanings as "Work as the one who thinks he will never die, and fear as the one who thinks he will die tomorrow" vol.3. p.40. h.no: 5379

"Your rightous one is the one who do not leave his dunya for his akhira and his akhira for his dunya" vol. 3, p. 238, h.no: 6336

The above hadith is regarded as weak because of the missing narraters.

However, Quran has a similar message;

2:200. So when you have performed your devotions, then laud Allah as you lauded your fathers, rather a greater lauding. But there are some people who say, Our Lord! give us in the world, and they shall have no resting place.
201. And there are some among them who say: Our Lord! grant us good in this world and good in the hereafter, and save us from the chastisement of the fire.
202. They shall have (their) portion of what they have earned, and Allah is swift in reckoning.


Want both this world and akhira from Allah
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*charisma*
11-01-2016, 07:14 AM
Assalamu Alaikum

I think your education is draining you. If you're studying to become a doctor, probably most of your time and effort is spent studying which can get depressing when you realize that other than this you are not doing anything else in your life that you can feel proud or accomplished about. And if your worship is lacking, I'm sure it's hitting you even harder because you feel drained and bored with life. Also as you mentioned, you don't have a passion for anything probably because you have not had the chance to explore different activities/hobbies that interest you.

If this is the case, then I can relate to what you're feeling and it's completely normal. My best friend right now is also studying dentistry and she has bouts of depression where she wants to just give up and live a "normal" life lool. I have to snap her out of it because I know it's so stressful, but she will feel so accomplished when she's done, and afterwards she will have all the time she wants to figure out what else she wants to do with her life.

I definitely think you need a break to just take a breather and reevaluate your goals and life expectations. I say this a lot but for me traveling does so much in helping me do that because I see problems all around the world and I want to figure out ways to solve them. Getting that type of exposure to a different culture/life/country makes you realize how much of a blessing you are in and the degree of advantage that you have over the rest of the world, that there are people who will need and rely on your expertise and assistance. If you don't feel like anyone or anything needs you, then you lose sight of what this world has to offer you.
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