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ceylincemal
02-12-2017, 07:16 AM
ASA

Ruling on attending functions/ banquets in an open bar

I was recently invited to red lobster, but they have a bar in the restaurant can I go

What about functions/ banquets that have an open bar, can I attend them

For those who do not know what a bar is, it is basically a spot they sell or give out alcohol

Of course I will not drink the alcohol or touch it or go near it

Need a reply ASAP

JAK
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Umm Abed
02-12-2017, 10:56 AM
Ws

No you shouldnt be attending such events at all, so many haram things go on there, the food is haram, the mixing and socializing, all not good.
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sister herb
02-12-2017, 11:10 AM
Food is haram? I think here is different of opinion among the schools about the consumption of lobster and other seafood besides fish.

Here have been discussions about this matter also before like: https://www.islamicboard.com/general...ter-halal.html

I am not sure is it haram to take part to kind of function if you don´t drink but others do. Can then Muslims ever eat in the restaurants if others may drink alcohol but they don´t? But of course it may not be good to stay with people whose may become drunked - people then many times may forget their manners.
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noraina
02-12-2017, 11:34 AM
Wa alaykum assalam,

Well, whether lobster is halal or not depends on the school of thought you follow, so I'll steer clear from that debate, lol.

I'd personally avoid any restaurant with an 'open bar' readily available - it is always the better option to eat at a place where you are faced with as little haraam as possible. There are many restaurants which don't have a bar, even though they may serve alcohol on request, and even better there are many rather lavish halal restaurants and halls - and the food and company there is excellent.

If the function really isn't that important, best to avoid it in'sha'Allah.
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Ummshareef
02-12-2017, 11:50 AM
Originally Posted by ceylincemal
Of course I will not drink the alcohol or touch it or go near it
:wa:

But by entering such an establishment you ARE going near it sister, at least literally.

In Islam there is a principle that we should never to even approach the limits set by Allah subhanahu wa ta'alaa, so I would steer well clear of such situations in sha'Allah.
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Simple_Person
02-12-2017, 12:10 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Abed
Ws

No you shouldnt be attending such events at all, so many haram things go on there, the food is haram, the mixing and socializing, all not good.
Every year during the new year or short after the new year many companies have a sort of a party that the people working at the company with their spouses or alone join. I have pondered about all kind of excuses to not go, as often it is all surrounded with music and stuff. However i did not think about the mixing part and socializing with the other gender, Jazakallahu khairan for mentioning it.

Lately, i have been reading how a woman should seduce a man she likes (in the western life style kind of mentality). Why reading this? So i know how to counter those signals and behavior. As women feel very offended/hurt if they declare to you that they like you and you as a man refuse them. As Allah(swt) even confirms this in the Qur'an.


".... [then if they persist], forsake them in bed; ..." Qur'an 4:34

When mixing takes place, this gives them a opportunity to have a private chat with you. Thus when you refuse her, she might get offended and MAYBE will try to hurt you (even maybe as blackmail or revenge). I mean if she should claim i have touched her and would say no i did not, ..it is my word against her. In the west, the man is by default guilty until proven innocent. So not given her any opportunity to have a private chat with me to let me know of what she is feeling or thinking.

Many women in the present day (non-religious ones) think just because they find themselves "beautiful" or "showing off their body" every man would automatically want to be with them. I THINK that many of these kind of women will resort to someway of revenge if a man would refuse such a woman. Very twisted mentality indeed.
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Umm Abed
02-13-2017, 11:26 AM
I see you have done quite a bit of research into this and as it is, there is possibility of revenge and blackmail if you refuse to be with them, not saying it always happen but things can spiral out of control with shaitan being in the middle.

Alhamdulillah we as Muslims have a pure system and by sticking to it we are saved from many haram things and trouble, and our concept of beauty is unique.

I think it is best to just excuse one's self from such gatherings they can be told that we do not mix as well as the music being a major problem.


Masha'allah you have really integrated well into this forum as I see it, hope you like it here:) @Simple_Person .
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Simple_Person
02-13-2017, 01:43 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Abed
Masha'allah you have really integrated well into this forum as I see it, hope you like it here @Simple_Person .
Every person who might benefit from anything that i may say, you will also in'sha'Allah get hassanaat from it, as you were the one directing me to this forum. Again Jazakallahu khairan :D
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Umm Abed
02-13-2017, 06:55 PM
Originally Posted by Simple_Person
Every person who might benefit from anything that i may say, you will also in'sha'Allah get hassanaat from it, as you were the one directing me to this forum. Again Jazakallahu khairan :D

Barakallah, :) may you continue to benefit others on the forum with your insightful posts, and Im sure you've learnt quite a bit too so far.

:jz:
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Huzaifah ibn Adam
02-13-2017, 07:11 PM
Rasoolullaah صلى الله عليه وسلم said:

من كان يؤمن بالله واليوم الآخر فلا يجلس على مائدة يدار عليها الخمر

"Whosoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day should not sit at a place where alcohol is served." [Narrated in Sunan at-Tirmidhi and Musnad Imaam Ahmad.]
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ceylincemal
02-14-2017, 12:00 AM
ASA

Thanks guys for the advices. Thing is like many said, it is a work function. On the e-mail invitation it said "mandatory gathering at La Joile banquet at 5:00 pm, meet 5:00 pm for cocktail then dinner starts at 6:00 pm."

So it is "mandatory" so that is what is scaring me.

JAK
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Simple_Person
02-14-2017, 04:58 AM
Originally Posted by ceylincemal
ASA

Thanks guys for the advices. Thing is like many said, it is a work function. On the e-mail invitation it said "mandatory gathering at La Joile banquet at 5:00 pm, meet 5:00 pm for cocktail then dinner starts at 6:00 pm."

So it is "mandatory" so that is what is scaring me.

JAK
Usually like you said certain things need to be done and after that they can't force you to stay or go to a "after party". Stay with them..mix yourself with other females and do not look at men. As to us men, eye contact is sort of "hey...i have noticed you"..

So in this case to choose the lesser evil if no other option is left.


Originally Posted by Umm Abed
I see you have done quite a bit of research into this and as it is, there is possibility of revenge and blackmail if you refuse to be with them, not saying it always happen but things can spiral out of control with shaitan being in the middle.

Alhamdulillah we as Muslims have a pure system and by sticking to it we are saved from many haram things and trouble, and our concept of beauty is unique.

I think it is best to just excuse one's self from such gatherings they can be told that we do not mix as well as the music being a major problem.
I just also remembered the story of Yusuf (as). As he refused that woman and she took her revenge for refusing her..as another sort of confirmation that women do not like to be refused.
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