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Simply
05-15-2017, 01:09 PM
Hello. I'm from Indonesia. Please call me Simply.

Getting straight to the point: I want to pursue faith and become a better Muslim.

Lately, I can't distract myself from the truth that time is going real fast. It goes to the point where it scares me every day, because I'm afraid of the End, for I haven't reached my worldly desires such as success, marriage, advanced education, and happiness. I really wish to become a better Muslim so that I can prepare for that day. Now, please let me tell a few things about myself.

First of all, I live in a city where people of around five different religions live together peacefully. My family branches in two, this is due to the separation of my Grandpa and Grandma, which leads to two very opposing lifestyle. My Grandpa's family, in which I live in now, is pretty much chill about religion. None of my close relatives wear hijab. My father himself is reluctant to pray (and he has a strong reason for that), meanwhile my mother is a Christian. My Grandpa focuses at his life career, to make sure that our family runs well. He prays everyday, but he says rude words sometimes. My (step) Grandma is not into Islam too. She prays daily, she fulfills all the rules except for hijab. As you can see, for someone living in this family, it's hard not to be distracted from Islam. But fortunately, I've come to a realization that Islam is really quintessential when it comes to life, so I'm trying to 're-enter' Islam right now. Hence why this discussion exists.

I'm currently in junior high school. And my friends are, well, the vast majority of my friends (not including my best friend) are not into Islam too. They're all held firm with the concept of modern society, so I can't seek help from them.

And I've always viewed Islam, and of course, Allah (SWT) as the most righteous matter in the world. I believe that He exists, that He watches over us without rest, but here's the one thing that I'm struggling with:

I don't feel the beauty of faith. And as terrible as it sounds, I haven't been able to fear Him..

People say they become happy when remembering Allah (SWT). Their heart is filled with joy as soon as they are reminded of him.

Unfortunately for me, I have not felt like that ever in my life..

But I'm eager to fix that. I want to feel it.

I'm mentally grown up (to the point where I know what is right and what is wrong), I experience womanly matter every month, but I haven't seen myself pray. During my womanly matters, I usually become more melancholic and sentimental, I am reminded of Islam whenever I experience my womanly matters, and become more motivated. But when they have passed, those motivations dissolve. The only way to get myself motivated to become a better Muslim is by remembering Allah every time I can.

Tell me, my friends, how do I strengthen my faith? How do I neglect worldly desires, and focus on the Afterlife? Where can I learn the basics of Islam? I'm really trying to get back to Islam. The only noteworthy action that I have committed in order to strengthen my faith is stopping myself from drawing, although it had been my passion for four years. For now, I'm learning how to pray correctly, how to read the Holy Book fluently, to stop myself from cursing (a thing that almost everyone in my school does), and to remember Allah all day every day.

Thank you for reading, friends. I await your reply.

From your friend,
Simply.
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greenhill
05-15-2017, 02:12 PM
Welcome to the forum.

I can see it in your writing that you are matured. That is definitely a good sign. Even better is that you believe in Him. In syaa Allah, with that you will always be guided.

Allah created us to worship Him, alone and nothing else! As long as you associate nothing with Him, you are there (eventually).

All the other action after that really just effects the degrees of hell fire you will face or the levels of jannah you will get. So do good deeds and refrain from bad. Sounds simple...

You know? (totally off topic but you did mention modern lifestyle..) A hoodie for me qualifies already as performing the hijab duties and the jacket is a loose fitting outfit..

Wishing you a great stay.


:peace:
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Simply
05-15-2017, 02:34 PM
Thank you very much! And yes perhaps I will purchase more unrevealing clothing. I have once asked my Grandpa whether I was allowed to wear Hijab, and he declined, stating that I haven't proven myself worthy of wearing such holy piece of clothing. For now, I will be doing my best to decrease the exposure of my body, be it wearing loose hoodies or long skirts. Thank you for your reply, my friend! And yes, I will stay here for long, this place seems to be reliable.
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hend.abuauf
05-15-2017, 07:19 PM
I see that you are on the right track masha'Allah, may Allah guide tou to his righteous path

Learning more about islam, you can join the islamic online university to learn about Islam

and memorizing Quran and knowing its meaning will help you insha'Allah

besides trying to increase your worship like staying consistent with praying, saying Adhkar of morning and evening.

Trying to remember Allah at all time and find intension in everything that you do

This will not come from a day and night it will take time to feel the beauty of faith

In the begining you will find that it is difficult and stressful to worship Allah properly but after awhile you will get into it and you will be able to feel the beauty of faith and if you missed a worship you will find that there is sometging missing
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Insaanah
05-15-2017, 09:21 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by Simply
Hello
Assalaamu alaikum sister, and a warm welcome to the forum.

format_quote Originally Posted by Simply
I have once asked my Grandpa whether I was allowed to wear Hijab, and he declined, stating that I haven't proven myself worthy of wearing such holy piece of clothing.
I just wanted to clarify a general principle, that we should not seek any human being's permission to practice any part of Islam. See the following translation of a hadith:

Sayyiduna ‘Ali (radiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said:

"There is no obedience to the creation (if it entails) the disobedience of the Creator." (Sahih ibn Hibban; Al Ihsan, Hadith: 4568 and Musnad Ahmad, vol. 1 pg. 131)

Also see the following hadeeth:

The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There is no obedience to any human being if it involves sin; obedience is only in that which is right and proper.”

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 7257; Muslim, 1840.

Also, in Islam, there is no such concept as a person being "worthy" of praying, or worthy of wearing hijab, or having to prove themselves worthy. These are fard acts that everyone must do.

Another thing, is that there is no "holiness" to a hijab, as in that bit of cloth has no particular virtue attached to it. It is what you do with it (ie cover yourself), and obey Allah, that's important.

Just wanted to clarify that, as sometimes our elders, with all respect due to them, have things they've been handed down that aren't necessarily from Islam, but what people have heard, sometimes cultural, and sometimes there are misconceptions.

It is wonderful to read your post and see how eager you are to want to get closer to Allah and feel joy in your heart. One thing that helps, is when you do dhikr, know the meaning of what you're saying, and think about that. Eg when saying Alhamdulillah, which means roughly all praise and thanks are due to Allah, think of that meaning, the blessings that He has bestowed on us, and how Majestic He is deserving of all our praise as our Lord and Sustainer, and how dependent we are on Him..

Also it isn't necessary that one does dhikr and suddenly feels this overwhelming joy, although that would be nice. In the Qur'an, Allah uses the word, tatma'in, which has been variously translated as rest, peace, assurance or satisfaction.

"Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah . Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured." (Surah al-Ra'd, Surah number 13:ayat 28)

If you feel joy as well, that is an added bonus, but at this stage, keep trying to improve yourself, including dhikr, even in the absence of any feeling. Our imaan can ebb and flow, and we just have to keep working at it. You said you're learning how to pray correctly, which is good, and praying salaat should be the number one priority.

Where can I learn the basics of Islam?
Do you have a mosque near you that holds classes, or a madrassah, or is there a female Islamic teacher locally?
Reply

Simply
05-16-2017, 09:54 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by hend.abuauf
I see that you are on the right track masha'Allah, may Allah guide tou to his righteous path

Learning more about islam, you can join the islamic online university to learn about Islam

and memorizing Quran and knowing its meaning will help you insha'Allah

besides trying to increase your worship like staying consistent with praying, saying Adhkar of morning and evening.

Trying to remember Allah at all time and find intension in everything that you do

This will not come from a day and night it will take time to feel the beauty of faith

In the begining you will find that it is difficult and stressful to worship Allah properly but after awhile you will get into it and you will be able to feel the beauty of faith and if you missed a worship you will find that there is something missing
I will do my best to strengthen my faith. Slowly but surely, I will get myself back in track. Thank you! I will always attempt to be a better Muslim, and remember Allah (SWT).
Reply

Simply
05-16-2017, 09:57 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Insaanah
Assalaamu alaikum sister, and a warm welcome to the forum.


I just wanted to clarify a general principle, that we should not seek any human being's permission to practice any part of Islam. See the following translation of a hadith:

Sayyiduna ‘Ali (radiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said:

"There is no obedience to the creation (if it entails) the disobedience of the Creator." (Sahih ibn Hibban; Al Ihsan, Hadith: 4568 and Musnad Ahmad, vol. 1 pg. 131)

Also see the following hadeeth:

The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There is no obedience to any human being if it involves sin; obedience is only in that which is right and proper.”

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 7257; Muslim, 1840.

Also, in Islam, there is no such concept as a person being "worthy" of praying, or worthy of wearing hijab, or having to prove themselves worthy. These are fard acts that everyone must do.

Another thing, is that there is no "holiness" to a hijab, as in that bit of cloth has no particular virtue attached to it. It is what you do with it (ie cover yourself), and obey Allah, that's important.

Just wanted to clarify that, as sometimes our elders, with all respect due to them, have things they've been handed down that aren't necessarily from Islam, but what people have heard, sometimes cultural, and sometimes there are misconceptions.

It is wonderful to read your post and see how eager you are to want to get closer to Allah and feel joy in your heart. One thing that helps, is when you do dhikr, know the meaning of what you're saying, and think about that. Eg when saying Alhamdulillah, which means roughly all praise and thanks are due to Allah, think of that meaning, the blessings that He has bestowed on us, and how Majestic He is deserving of all our praise as our Lord and Sustainer, and how dependent we are on Him..

Also it isn't necessary that one does dhikr and suddenly feels this overwhelming joy, although that would be nice. In the Qur'an, Allah uses the word, tatma'in, which has been variously translated as rest, peace, assurance or satisfaction.

"Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah . Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured." (Surah al-Ra'd, Surah number 13:ayat 28)

If you feel joy as well, that is an added bonus, but at this stage, keep trying to improve yourself, including dhikr, even in the absence of any feeling. Our imaan can ebb and flow, and we just have to keep working at it. You said you're learning how to pray correctly, which is good, and praying salaat should be the number one priority.



Do you have a mosque near you that holds classes, or a madrassah, or is there a female Islamic teacher locally?
I think there is one near my house. But I've been told that in Indonesia, it isn't always 'right' -- the teachings that they give, I mean. I've been told that information given from one source doesn't sound the same with the other sometimes. Should I give it a try?
Reply

Lx77
04-03-2020, 05:23 AM
The fact that you're wanting to change your ways is AMAZING. I'm proud of you Ma'Sha'Allah. I can relate to your situation, I myself, am trying to be a better muslim. I haven't been the best.

In order to strengthen your relationship with Allah (swt), repent. Allah (swt) LOVES those who sincerely repent. Pray all of your obligatory prayers, it's okay if you can't pray all 5 in one day, take it easy and within time you will start praying 5 a day, in sha Allah. Start little by little. Also, have trust in Allah swt. Just know that everything that happens to you, good or bad, happens for a reason, Allah swt has willed it to happen. If you're going through a tough time and feel like Allah swt is punishing you, this is a GOOD thing. Allah swt punishes us for the sins we have committed in order to lessen our punishment in the Akhirah, that's how much our Lord loves us. However, don't get me wrong, not every tough time is a punishment, it can also be a test from Allah swt, to bring you closer to Him. Another way to become a good/better muslim is by gaining knowledge. Learn more about Islam and the history of Islam. Try and commit to the 5 pillars of Islam also.

Make dua, did you know Allah swt has 3 responses to Dua? 1) Allah swt accepts your Dua. 2) Allah swt accepts it but not yet 3) Allah swt gives you something better than what you asked for


Furthermore, as well as improving yourself religiously, try to become a better person as well. Be kind to people, give money to charity, treat others with respect always and be good to your parents. Allah swt loves people like this too. You can pray all you want but if you treat people rubbish, Allah swt will not be happy with you.

Once again, it's amazing that you aspire to change. You will already be getting reward for this, in sha Allah. Just ask for sincere forgiveness for your past sins, do not turn back to them at all. Read your salah, read the Quran, gain more Islamic knowledge and try to be a better person in general.

You could learn the basics of Islam on the internet, however, be careful, not all information people write is correct. Try watching Islamic videos on youtube and listening to scholars speak. One of my favourite speakers is Nouman Ali Khan, he's amazing!! The islamic videos are honestly eye-openers and make you realise how much this Dunya is worth. Absolutely nothing.

May Allah swt bless you and your family, take care. May Allah swt forgive me if I have said anything wrong. I hope this has been somewhat useful to you, if not, my apologies.
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