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Bobbyflay23
05-19-2017, 12:21 AM
How often do really hard hardships happen I just want one to happen to me because the last one I failed and also if allah doesn't send one your way for a while it's a sign he doesn't love you plus it expiates sins and gives good deeds I really want a hardship tbh
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*charisma*
05-19-2017, 01:10 AM
Assalamu ALaikum

Bro you should embrace what Allah has given you. Even when things are going good, it's a test because how often do we thank Allah or use our good health and free time to worship Him?

You shouldn't desire a hardship because you never know if you will be able to tolerate it. Imagine if you wake up tomorrow to find your parents have died Allah forbid. Is that a hardship you'd want to endure? What about if you caught an incurable and painful illness? Or were stricken with great poverty? These types of hardships can easily make your sincere worship nonexistant, especially if you are in a vulnerable state where shaytan will work hard to separate you from your faith. Instead, use the blessings you have to thank Allah and do more worship while you can. The fact that you don't have any boundaries between you and your worship is a great thing. There are many other ways that our sins can be expiated.

This reminds of me of a saying:


A man came to Al-Hasan Al-Basri and said:

“I heard you say that if you commit sins, then Allah prevents you from things. I do all the sins that you can think of and don’t do many good deeds. I have a beautiful wife and beautiful kids and a lot of money and land and I am successful. Allah did not prevent me from anything. How is it that you say that because of sins Allah prevents you?”


Al-Basri replied:

“Do you pray qiyamul-layl? Do you enjoy your du’a? Do you enjoy your ṣalah? That is enough prevention--that He prevented you from communicating with Him.”


ALhemdulilah Allah has not deserted you, so consider it an advantage to become even stronger in your worship and faith inshallah.
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Bobbyflay23
05-19-2017, 01:12 AM
Originally Posted by *charisma*
Assalamu ALaikum

Bro you should embrace what Allah has given you. Even when things are going good, it's a test because how often do we thank Allah or use our good health and free time to worship Him?

You shouldn't desire a hardship because you never know if you will be able to tolerate it. Imagine if you wake up tomorrow to find your parents have died Allah forbid. Is that a hardship you'd want to endure? What about if you caught an incurable and painful illness? Or were stricken with great poverty? These types of hardships can easily make your sincere worship nonexistant, especially if you are in a vulnerable state where shaytan will work hard to separate you from your faith. Instead, use the blessings you have to thank Allah and do more worship while you can. The fact that you don't have any boundaries between you and your worship is a great thing. There are many other ways that our sins can be expiated.

This reminds of me of a saying:


A man came to Al-Hasan Al-Basri and said:

“I heard you say that if you commit sins, then Allah prevents you from things. I do all the sins that you can think of and don’t do many good deeds. I have a beautiful wife and beautiful kids and a lot of money and land and I am successful. Allah did not prevent me from anything. How is it that you say that because of sins Allah prevents you?”


Al-Basri replied:

“Do you pray qiyamul-layl? Do you enjoy your du’a? Do you enjoy your ṣalah? That is enough prevention--that He prevented you from communicating with Him.”


ALhemdulilah Allah has not deserted you, so consider it an advantage to become even stronger in your worship and faith inshallah.
Yea but I failed my last difficult hardship and I just want to show allah I can pass the next one
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*charisma*
05-19-2017, 01:15 AM
Originally Posted by Bobbyflay23
Yea but I failed my last difficult hardship and I just want to show allah I can pass the next one
If you committed a sin, then you repent by making better choices, not repeating the sin, and praising ALlah and praying for forgiveness.
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Bobbyflay23
05-19-2017, 02:38 AM
Plus allah doesn't put a hardship on one that cannot bear it so as long as I can bear it I don't really care because the reward after will be better
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Bobbyflay23
05-19-2017, 04:04 AM
Plus my dad barley even cares about me and then my moms pretty much hates me but she acts like she doesn't so really id only care if my dad died and I wouldn't end up sad for a entire year I'd get over it after a week or two possibly more a month max but that's lest likely plus I feel like I can deal with deaths easily I'd just think oh I'll just try to meet up him/her in jannah that's what I think about my cat when I realize it's gonna die soon I only feel sympathy for it's pain and then like sickened upon me i mean sure I don't like pain but I don't really care if I'm gonna die infact I'd like to so I can meet up with allah then there's poverty for me I think that would be the hardest considering I've lived in a big house and all that stuff but I don't really care about money tbh I don't have any dunya wants except for getting married young so yea I mean being in poverty would mean no food which I don't like that at all and no company bymyself in a house I wouldn't like that at all either and no marriage at a young age and I'd hate that too so that's really the only trial that would get to me and still I think I'd be able to get through it sure it would be hard but I mean inlahi wu ini ragon doesn't really matter in the end now does it? I'm not disrespecting anyone going through hardship btw I feel for ya I just want to get closer to allah and what better way then a trial? As many mufti menk talks about it it's like medicine I may not like it but I need it
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*charisma*
05-19-2017, 04:11 AM
But you're essentially making dua against yourself/ family rather than asking for the best affairs. I mean if you experienced a hardship what does that mean? It means you are put in a position where you have to make dua, be patient, and pray and be an overall better muslim. You can do that without having difficulties placed in your direction. Asking for hardship is not the way of the sunnah. You are not perfect so the hardships that will come to you is when you want to be better.. like go learn quran..not being able to memorize is a hardship. Go study arabic...support a charity. Do something to make iman better and you will find hardships facing you, but domt request them out of the blue because that is asking for your demise.
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*charisma*
05-19-2017, 04:19 AM
Well from what you said..dont you think the issues you have with your parents is a trial? No one should feel that way toward their parents so dont you think its something you are being tested with and should try to fix?
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Bobbyflay23
05-19-2017, 04:21 AM
Originally Posted by *charisma*
But you're essentially making dua against yourself/ family rather than asking for the best affairs. I mean if you experienced a hardship what does that mean? It means you are put in a position where you have to make dua, be patient, and pray and be an overall better muslim. You can do that without having difficulties placed in your direction. Asking for hardship is not the way of the sunnah. You are not perfect so the hardships that will come to you is when you want to be better.. like go learn quran..not being able to memorize is a hardship. Go study arabic...support a charity. Do something to make iman better and you will find hardships facing you, but domt request them out of the blue because that is asking for your demise.
What Demise is there other then being a khufarr as far as the Hadith talks about it hard ship is probwbly one of the things that will help you out most on judgement day there's a Hadith talking about how it's like smelting gold to remove the impuritys you hit two birds with one stone one you earn a ton of good deeds and cleanse your heart and 2 you become closer to allah the only problem with a hardship is dunya and look at rasoolallah he had the most hardships out of everyone who ever lived trial after trial after trial and he was also the best so is there really a problem with wanting to be like him and the more trials you get the more allah loves you unless it's a punishment one trial could be the only reason why you enter jannah you know I know trial is hard but that doesn't mean i shouldn't be up for a challenge in this way I can prove to god that I want to be on his deen the only trial I've had I wasn't even a Muslim technically a kufar since I mocked basically all religions with my friends so that out me outside the fold of Islam and I didn't pray so this means the next trial will be the only trial I've gone through as a muslim and is a way to show to god that I'm willing to stay on his path ya know prove myself this world is a test should I not take the hardest test if I fail it there's no consequences I just repent and if I succeed then I get a big reward
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Bobbyflay23
05-19-2017, 04:29 AM
Originally Posted by *charisma*
Well from what you said..dont you think the issues you have with your parents is a trial? No one should feel that way toward their parents so dont you think its something you are being tested with and should try to fix?
I can't fix nothing with my mom that's impossible she literally hates everyone but hides it but it comes out of her and you can see her hatred i adapted to it when I was young I basically don't even care she was actually my last trial basically but then my dad idk me and my dad talk somtimes but it's not like we have a bond or anything and he mostly has a negative attitude to everything and backbite a so I don't like sitting with him because all he does is complain about everything including me not really a trial I've adapted to it since I was a kid
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Umm♥Layth
05-19-2017, 02:35 PM
Oh, you don't want hardship,believe me. Some days I feel like I am drowning and can't catch a break for some air. I miss the days where tribulation was mild and I regret not being grateful enough during those times. To think that others have it even worse. It makes me feel like a weakling.

When it rains, it pours so you better take this time and become strong, because hardship WILL SHAKE YOUR FAITH. Something you can't even imagine.
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ardianto
05-19-2017, 03:54 PM
Originally Posted by Bobbyflay23
Yea but I failed my last difficult hardship and I just want to show allah I can pass the next one
Assalamualaikum, young brother.

Your life is easier than those who live in poverty, those who live with disabilities, those who lost their families and homes in war or disaster. So, instead of be grateful with what Allah has given to you, why you expect Allah give hardship to you?.

We are being tested in various different ways. There are those who tested with poverty. There are who tested with life pleasure, like you. You live in family with good financial condition. You can go to school, you can enjoy your youth life, foods always available for you. But don't you know that these pleasure actually is a test?. The test is, can you be grateful with what Allah has given to you?. And if instead of be grateful you expect a hardship, it's mean you have failed in this test.

Young bro, don't say "I just want to show allah I can pass the next one" because this is the attitude of takabur, or "an arrogance which you are proud that you can do anything". No, no, this is not a good attitude.

Be grateful with what Allah has given to you. Okay?. :)
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Serinity
05-19-2017, 04:08 PM
:salam:

There is a test like poverty, the death of a loved one, etc. This requires trust in Allah :swt: and patience.

Another is wealth, ease, pleasure, financially stable, everything is just easy, etc.

Be grateful, and thank Allah :swt: - BE GRATEFUL.

Allahu alam.
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Bobbyflay23
05-19-2017, 11:39 PM
Originally Posted by ardianto
Assalamualaikum, young brother.

Your life is easier than those who live in poverty, those who live with disabilities, those who lost their families and homes in war or disaster. So, instead of be grateful with what Allah has given to you, why you expect Allah give hardship to you?.

We are being tested in various different ways. There are those who tested with poverty. There are who tested with life pleasure, like you. You live in family with good financial condition. You can go to school, you can enjoy your youth life, foods always available for you. But don't you know that these pleasure actually is a test?. The test is, can you be grateful with what Allah has given to you?. And if instead of be grateful you expect a hardship, it's mean you have failed in this test.

Young bro, don't say "I just want to show allah I can pass the next one" because this is the attitude of takabur, or "an arrogance which you are proud that you can do anything". No, no, this is not a good attitude.

Be grateful with what Allah has given to you. Okay?. :)
How is it arrogant to want to be worth more then I am currently worth to allah it's not that I'm not greatful it's just that I want somthing taken away to show that I don't care and I'll worship him either way but everyone here says it's bad to want this from my view it seems fine since you can get the best reward that way I don't care if it's difficult I care about if it's rewarding whys it matter this world is nothing compared to what people will endure in the hell fire so if souls are going to be going through that then I should be willing to go through the most pain here to save myself from the pain there dunya luxury won't last I've never cared for money I want to be in a state that's best for my relation ship with allah that's best for me in this world and the next and that relation is trial because I'll be forced to get up and stop procrastinating and then I'll also be getting good deeds every day without trying all id have to do is practice sabr should we all be asking for more trial to get more think about t the more dunya you throw away the more it mulitiplies in the akhira hardship is hard and I don't disrespect the people that go through it
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LaSorcia
05-19-2017, 11:46 PM
Originally Posted by Bobbyflay23
Yea but I failed my last difficult hardship and I just want to show allah I can pass the next one
All of life in the dunya is a hardship, so you don't need to wish for one. Whether our circumstances are making us happy or causing us grief, it is all a trial. As sister Charisma said, we need to make the most of positive circumstances to strengthen our iman. The older I get, the more I realize that this is not easy to do.

Yes, we all make mistakes when hardships come our way. Many who have weak iman call on God when circumstances are difficult, but forget to thank and praise him when they are good. The hardship in good circumstances is to continually seek God as if your circumstances were difficult. That is my dua, that I always live and seek God as if I desperately need His help... because I always do whether I realize it or not.
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LaSorcia
05-20-2017, 12:03 AM
I'd also like to add, that even during hardships, when we fail, we realize how weak we are and how much we need God/Allah. That is a beautiful grace.
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Bobbyflay23
05-20-2017, 02:57 AM
Originally Posted by LaSorcia
I'd also like to add, that even during hardships, when we fail, we realize how weak we are and how much we need God/Allah. That is a beautiful grace.
THATS ONE OF THE REASONS I WANT A TRIAL because I'm too lazy I'll say okay today Ima go do some nawafil and then I'll get home and play PlayStation all day
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Alpha Dude
05-20-2017, 11:13 AM
It's understandable why you feel this way and may Allah reward your intention. Aameen.

Do realize though, that iman is a treasure. It is something that will decide whether we go to hell or heaven. It is for this reason, that Prophet Sallalahu Alaihe Wassalam told us to flee from dajjal. He will mislead and end up nullifying a person's iman, even though that person will go to him thinking he has strong enough iman to not be taken in by dajjal.

Dajjal will be an immense test for the believers. Some hardships can also end up being severe enough to cause a person's iman to be in danger.

You seem kind of young so perhaps you don't realise the true nature of what you are asking upon yourself. You may think of hardships as perhaps temporary things, e.g. your mum or dad dying and then you go on with your life after 'showing patience'. In fact, Allah knows you better than you know yourself. Since you feel the death of your parents will not affect you that much, then your request for hardship from Allah will probably come in other forms that will in fact cause you some kind of suffering.

Iman fluctuates. This is a fact that cannot be denied. If it remained strong all the time, we would be shaking hands with the angels. So, it is silly to ask for hardship while you may be feeling strong right now. Come later, when your iman feels lower and you are being severely test, who is to say you will remain patient enough?

Imagine tomorrow your hand or leg gets chopped off and you have to live the rest of your life without the use of your limb. Or you get given a long term illness that debilitates you for life. Or you get thrown into jail for many years where you get beaten by all the other inmates on a regular occasion or you marry someone you love and she ends up having an affair which you find out years after you have married her and have had kids with her. Etc. There are many such evil fates that can happen to you. Point is, it is easy to assume when you have hard temporary hardship that you feel you can be strong enough and patient enough to handle but when Allah really tests a person for years on end without an end in sight? That is when you need a rock solid connection with Allah otherwise you will lose all hope in Allah's help and mercy and even end up losing your faith in him.

I can't fix nothing with my mom that's impossible she literally hates everyone but hide
Make no mistake about it, the biggest strength in those times of hardship will be your connection with Allah and your firm belief in him. When you make dua, you have to believe it will be accepted and you have to have a positive belief that all things are under his control and he can do anything. In fact, you are not there yet. You already mentioned that you have a problem with your mother but feel that for her to change is impossible. Really? How can it be impossible when Allah has everything under his control? Don't you have faith in your own dua and Allah's ability? If that is the case now, how will you possibly face other extreme hardships and come out with your iman in tact?

Yeah, no. Don't do it. Ask Allah for goodness and patience and try to develop a convinced connection and belief in him.
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YahyaAE
05-20-2017, 11:48 AM
Bro.... Dont. Make. Bad. Duas.

The point of hardships is that its a test. And tests come in many different forms. Allah doesnt give hardships just for fun. He loves you regardless. Just know that if you are not being tested with hardship, then you need to be thankful... But beware and trust me on this, you are being tested in other ways.

And once again I repeat. Don't. Make. Bad. Duas. You don't want to be afflicted with something difficult in this life again.
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Bobbyflay23
05-20-2017, 06:48 PM
Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
It's understandable why you feel this way and may Allah reward your intention. Aameen.

Do realize though, that iman is a treasure. It is something that will decide whether we go to hell or heaven. It is for this reason, that Prophet Sallalahu Alaihe Wassalam told us to flee from dajjal. He will mislead and end up nullifying a person's iman, even though that person will go to him thinking he has strong enough iman to not be taken in by dajjal.

Dajjal will be an immense test for the believers. Some hardships can also end up being severe enough to cause a person's iman to be in danger.

You seem kind of young so perhaps you don't realise the true nature of what you are asking upon yourself. You may think of hardships as perhaps temporary things, e.g. your mum or dad dying and then you go on with your life after 'showing patience'. In fact, Allah knows you better than you know yourself. Since you feel the death of your parents will not affect you that much, then your request for hardship from Allah will probably come in other forms that will in fact cause you some kind of suffering.

Iman fluctuates. This is a fact that cannot be denied. If it remained strong all the time, we would be shaking hands with the angels. So, it is silly to ask for hardship while you may be feeling strong right now. Come later, when your iman feels lower and you are being severely test, who is to say you will remain patient enough?

Imagine tomorrow your hand or leg gets chopped off and you have to live the rest of your life without the use of your limb. Or you get given a long term illness that debilitates you for life. Or you get thrown into jail for many years where you get beaten by all the other inmates on a regular occasion or you marry someone you love and she ends up having an affair which you find out years after you have married her and have had kids with her. Etc. There are many such evil fates that can happen to you. Point is, it is easy to assume when you have hard temporary hardship that you feel you can be strong enough and patient enough to handle but when Allah really tests a person for years on end without an end in sight? That is when you need a rock solid connection with Allah otherwise you will lose all hope in Allah's help and mercy and even end up losing your faith in him.



Make no mistake about it, the biggest strength in those times of hardship will be your connection with Allah and your firm belief in him. When you make dua, you have to believe it will be accepted and you have to have a positive belief that all things are under his control and he can do anything. In fact, you are not there yet. You already mentioned that you have a problem with your mother but feel that for her to change is impossible. Really? How can it be impossible when Allah has everything under his control? Don't you have faith in your own dua and Allah's ability? If that is the case now, how will you possibly face other extreme hardships and come out with your iman in tact?

Yeah, no. Don't do it. Ask Allah for goodness and patience and try to develop a convinced connection and belief in him.
I don't say it's impossible because I hate her or something it's just literally impossible she's very manipulative and hypocritical in every situation and then will call you arrogant when I'll talk to her nice and she's actually the one being arrogant and all this stuff I can't explain everything in this thread but it doesn't matter because I don't really care I've just seen her in my life like ounce in a while like rarly
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Alpha Dude
05-20-2017, 07:03 PM
I don't say it's impossible because I hate her or something it's just literally impossible she's very manipulative and hypocritical in every situation
My point is that you should believe anything as possible, despite the circumstance and how it appears on the outside, when you believe Allah is in control of everything.

Only when you have such faith, would you be able to stay patient and trust in Allah when he puts you through extreme hardship that would normally break a man.
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Serinity
05-20-2017, 08:01 PM
:salam:

Remember Allah in good times, and He :swt: will remember you in hard times.

remind yourself of death often, and be grateful to Allah.

Allahu alam.
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Bobbyflay23
05-20-2017, 08:02 PM
Originally Posted by Alpha Dude
My point is that you should believe anything as possible, despite the circumstance and how it appears on the outside, when you believe Allah is in control of everything.

Only when you have such faith, would you be able to stay patient and trust in Allah when he puts you through extreme hardship that would normally break a man.
I don't say it's impossible as in allah can't do it I say it's impossible as in I get the vibe from her that allah sealed her heart you wouldn't understand if I went through the full story of her life with shirk violence sucicide spying on a mosk murder attempts stealing and then attempting to cheat on her very loyal husband that I honestly feel bad for because he stopped alcohol and everything but doesn't know how is wife truly is espically because she tried to have a abortion and all of this stuff and bro I just can't list all the stuff she does it reminds me of the verses of allah where he says when lighting strikes they move upon and then they just stop when it's gone that's her when she's at the mosk she'll but a super Muslim crying for a second and when she's gone she's literally a human Sheyton backbiting and brainwashing me to think my dad's a evil person and sending me back home and literally making me make my dad cry (that was the trial I went through) I could go on and on and the only reason why I was fooled so easily by my mom was because I wasn't a Muslim I'm sure if I was a Muslim I'd say haram backbiting she literally started fake crying to make it seem like my dad hurt her so much and said your dad hit me and this and that and all of this stuff and when I go home my dad reminds me of how my mom really is and talks about how all of the legitimate proof he has and all this stuff and then now I'm back to where I was whatever happened is inbettween them
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Bobbyflay23
05-20-2017, 08:12 PM
And allah seals the hypocrites heart if they become a 100% hypocrite she shows all the signs of one if the verses of allah and all these hadiths being spoken to her isn't working or any good deed that she has been doing possibly it's not going to work she seems stuck in her old ways
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