:bism: Bismillah Ir-Rehman Ir-Raheem
(In the Name of God, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful)
:sl: (And peace be upon you)
Sister, I'm genuinely sorry to hear of your situation and troubles. That said, I am also confident that you know well what you have to do: cut off all contact with him. Please do not return his texts or accept from henceforth any dinner invitations. Shaitaan
is always a third between the opposite gender, and you have to try your best to not let any situation return in which you can be alone with him.
Sister, what you're describing is infatuation and not love. Recognize you're not his wife and therefore you do not deal with his different negative moods at home that probably include include at times arguing, petulance, and escapism. So, you're both just seeing the best side of one another for a few hours at workplace, a place wherein professionalism is expected, and therefore none of you are dealing with the day-to-day challenges of being in a marital relationship. Consider whatever happened a test. And move on forward from this point onward. He'll probably try to sway you away from doing so, and you must be strong. Remember that Allah is with the patient (Qur'an 2:153).
Also, if possible, if I were you, I'd start immediately searching for and interviewing for new jobs. Because once a line is crossed, it is harder to have it redrawn. And there's always the possibility that either you or him may be tempted into crossing it again at the workplace if either of you feel too inhibited by the line drawn or otherwise lonely, depressed, troubled or whatnot in your life due to other life circumstance. So, do yourself the favor and either quit the job or start searching for new one while you working this one as you're going to also want a fresh start away from this situation.
I'd also strongly advise you that you do not disclose any of this situation to a potential future partner because you haven't I am assuming crossed any physical limits and only crossed spiritual boundaries that can lead to eventually the crossing of physical limits; so, it's better that you keep this information to yourself as unnecessarily you'll be creating suspicion in the mind of a future partner as to your character.
And just as a FYI, I want you to know that men generally talk bad about their wives to women they perceive as willing to become their girlfriend, but these men generally do not have any intentions to leave their wife and children and marital home and take responsibility for any girlfriend; they are only good at sweet-talking and taking advantage of the in-built vulnerability emergent from the woman's feelings for the married man. Sincerely, sis, he's not worth the trauma you'll face if you continue getting closer to him. Cut him off. Not tomorrow. From today, this moment, now. Let this be a new beginning for you, and especially since it's Shahru Ramadan and you can instead concentrate on getting closer to Allah, your wonderful Creator, who loves you and wants you to turn back to Him.
:wa: (And peace be upon you)
Originally Posted by Daisies08