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anonymous
07-02-2017, 04:43 PM
Salam

There's a growing trend of holding festivals in public places like parks. I might sound kilo a bit of a scrooge but I just find them no different to fair and Mela events. I know such events are targeted to families but invariably you'll find a large crowd of single male and females which obviously is an issue. I don't know what the organisers can do because I'm sure they well intentioned and'it's impossible to have complete segregation. I always seem to be the black sheep in my family as such events have never appealed to me but this usually leads to ppl accusing me of being a spoil sport to put it politely . maybe I am being a bit extreme but what do other think??
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Hamza Asadullah
07-02-2017, 05:47 PM
:wa:

A sister asked a similar question with regards to attending a mixed Eid party with family:

It is encouraging to note that you are trying your best to refrain from haram and adhere to the laws of Sharī'ah.

Islam is a religion that promotes modesty and self respect; the Holy Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said:

«إِنَّ لِكُلِّ دِينٍ خُلُقًا، وَإِنَّ خُلُقَ الْإِسْلَامِ الْحَيَاءُ»

“Verily in every religion there is morality, the morality of Islam is modesty.” [Sunan Ibn Majah, 4182, Book of Zuhd, Chapter of Hayā]

In another hadith, the Holy Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) states:

«الْحَيَاءُ مِنَ الْإِيمَانِ، وَالْإِيمَانُ فِي الْجَنَّةِ»

“Modesty is part of faith, and faith will be in Paradise.” [Sunan Ibn Majah, 4184, Book of Zuhd, Chapter of Hayā]

Interaction with ghairmahrams and mixed gatherings disguised under Islamic names are not only contrary to the teachings of the Quran and Sunnah[1], but they also corrode the fine natural values Islam attempts to inculcate within us.[2] As a result, these gatherings also become a reason for invoking the anger of Allah Ta'ālā.[3]

If the gathering in question does not exercise hijab and allows men and women to freely intermingle with one another, then it is imperative for you to avoid attending such a party and advise your husband to do the same. You should excuse yourself from attending this gathering and kindly inform your family members about your stance concerning this matter.

May Allah Ta'ālā keep us away from fitnah and grant us success in this life and the hereafter. Āmeen.

Source: http://www.askimam.org/public/question_detail/27228

So for you to keep away from mixed gatherings shows you have concern over your imaan and therefor you are not being "extreme" at all. What difference is there between a mixed event like this and the market places (high streets and shopping centres) where one should only go if necessary. Mixed gatherings are the most hated places by Allah as they are places of fitnah and where shaythans gather.

However if the gathering were sfully segregated between women and children and men, then the ruling would be quite different as long as other aspects of shariah were not compromised.

So you are absolutely right to keep away from mixed events even under the guise of "Eid" or any other religiously affiliated event. We must realise that Allah only wants the best for us and Islam is about "prevention is better than the cure".

Islam does enjoin that we enjoy our lives but within the boundaries of our deen. By doing so we will have peace, blessings and contentment in whatever we do but by transgressing the limits we are putting ourselves in danger and we will not feel at peace within ourselves.

And Allah knows best in all matters
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anonymous
07-02-2017, 06:28 PM
It's a very awkward position to be in. Especially when it feels like everyone'else is happily talking part. It's just a reflection of the general decline of values in society. People don't bat an eyelid and some ignoramuses think their actually doing something good. By all means there should be a sense of festivity to mark eid but surely there's more permissible ways. I mean the best way is to celebrate it in your home. Such events only serve to encourage those that neglect the basics to continue doing so . they will attend such events being held in the name of Deen and accuse those that disagree as being sad and boring.
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Hamza Asadullah
07-02-2017, 07:21 PM
Originally Posted by anonymous
It's a very awkward position to be in. Especially when it feels like everyone'else is happily talking part. It's just a reflection of the general decline of values in society. People don't bat an eyelid and some ignoramuses think their actually doing something good. By all means there should be a sense of festivity to mark eid but surely there's more permissible ways. I mean the best way is to celebrate it in your home. Such events only serve to encourage those that neglect the basics to continue doing so . they will attend such events being held in the name of Deen and accuse those that disagree as being sad and boring.
We should keep reminding our families of the benefits of living our lives in accordance with Islamic values and the harms of going beyond the boundaries set by our deen. We have an element of influence on our families as they are in our circle of influence, so we should try our best to make them see sense whilst I also asking of Allah to help and guide us all to live in a way that pleases him the most.

Most of all we should instill Islamic values within our children so they grow up understanding the importance of living our lives within the boundaries of our deen and upon Islamic principles. They are our next generation and for them growing up in these societies that are full of fitnah will be challenging. But we have the advantage of having more knowledge of Deen than many of our parents who come from very culturally influenced societies.

We should put on good Islamic lectures in our homes regularly in front of family, and keep doing good gentle reminders with persevere nice and eventually it will have a positive affect inshaAllah. But we must not get frustrated or angry towards them as that will have the opposite affect. We should portray good character which attracts others rather than harsh character which will push people away.

But regardless of the actions of our families we should never compromise our deen to please anyone else. This includes not attending mixed weddings, birthday parties and any other event contrary to Islamic principles. And we should know that we are doing so solely for the pleasure of Allah and Allah will put a pleasure and satisfaction in our hearts far greater than what we will gain from attending such events or doing that which is contrary to the teachings of our deen.

May Allah enable us to live our lives in a way that pleases him the most. Ameen
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azc
07-03-2017, 05:54 PM
Such gatherings open the gate of charming deviation
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anonymous
07-03-2017, 06:21 PM
Sometimes it's like preaching to the dumb and blind and I don't say that lightly. Any one with an iota of decency knows that these events invite nothing but fitnah. Yet ppl are so naive to want you to belive that everyone has their gaze lowered. If you'try and give ppl good advice they act all offended it's laughable.
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'Abd-al Latif
07-03-2017, 10:11 PM
Originally Posted by anonymous
Salam

There's a growing trend of holding festivals in public places like parks. I might sound kilo a bit of a scrooge but I just find them no different to fair and Mela events. I know such events are targeted to families but invariably you'll find a large crowd of single male and females which obviously is an issue. I don't know what the organisers can do because I'm sure they well intentioned and'it's impossible to have complete segregation. I always seem to be the black sheep in my family as such events have never appealed to me but this usually leads to ppl accusing me of being a spoil sport to put it politely . maybe I am being a bit extreme but what do other think??
Just out of curiosity, what do you think the Sahaba used to do? There were clearly places during their lifetime where men and women used to mix. What would they do?
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anonymous
07-04-2017, 10:08 AM
Originally Posted by 'Abd-al Latif
Just out of curiosity, what do you think the Sahaba used to do? There were clearly places during their lifetime where men and women used to mix. What would they do?
I think that's quite inappropriate and not befitting given the esteemed status of the sahaba. It would appear you're implying they would have no problem with events where there is next to no regard for segregation and hijab in general. Add to this you have a popstar wannabe blasting "halal music" and I think you have a recipe for destruction.

In answering your curiosity I have complete belief that they would shun such such events.

Why do we have to try and replicate non-islamic events by putting a religious tag on them. Arrange fun days at local mosques/community centres. Would be far more beneficial than the current trend.
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'Abd-al Latif
07-04-2017, 04:53 PM
Originally Posted by anonymous
I think that's quite inappropriate and not befitting given the esteemed status of the sahaba. It would appear you're implying they would have no problem with events where there is next to no regard for segregation and hijab in general. Add to this you have a popstar wannabe blasting "halal music" and I think you have a recipe for destruction.

In answering your curiosity I have complete belief that they would shun such such events.

Why do we have to try and replicate non-islamic events by putting a religious tag on them. Arrange fun days at local mosques/community centres. Would be far more beneficial than the current trend.
I'm not implying anything as I simply asked what you know.

What would they do in the market place? Does Islam suggest men and women live on different sides of the planet?
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azc
07-04-2017, 05:51 PM
Islam prefers segregation between opposite gender in order to avoid any expected or unexpected fitnah and Free mixing is strictly prohibited. Seeking any leeway of permission to hold such gatherings, apparently, is subjected to satanic ruse.
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Hamza Asadullah
07-04-2017, 11:20 PM
There is a huge difference between having to go to the marketplace out of necessity and attending "voluntary" events especially if such events do not have the necessary segregation and/ or break any other rules in the Shariah. The Sahabah used to be prompt if they required anything in the marketplace and we are also encouraged to do the same as they are places frequented by shaythan and are the places most hated by Allah as is any other place or even where free mixing is rampant.

The Sahabah also used to remember Allah in places where Allah is not remembered as much:

‘None has the right to be worshipped except Allaah, alone, without partner, to Him belongs all sovereignty and praise. He gives life and causes death, and He is living and does not die. In His hand is all good and He is over all things, omnipotent.’

It is narrated in the hadith:

“Whoever recites the above dua after entering the market, will receive a million rewards, one million sins of his shall be forgiven, his rank will be raised by a million stages and (in some narrations) he will receive a house in Jannah” [Ibn Majah]

Alhamdulillah there are still many Islamic events which do have the required segregation and do not break any other rules disallowed in the Shariah. These are the sorts of events which should be sought after.

What I would also say is that those who do break the rules then we should not look down on them or put them down. But give then gentle reminders and make Dua for them.

And Allah knows best in all matters
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