How I became a human devil!

[the repenter13]

After many years of trial and hardship I finally got angry at god and finally broke down. And of course god punished me severely and now my life is literally over!. My Iman has been completely sucked out dry from my heart. I have no emotion anymore. I pens my days sinning all day intentionally and I'm a literal puppet. The devil has won over me. And now I'm an actual devil myself. I can't listen to Quran or hear anything about Islam. I know I'm going to hell forever and there is no hope. I could literally kill drone and not feel a thing. I was cursed ever since I was born and who's fault is that?. I regret ever being Muslim in the first place because it led to my destruction. So just wanted to share that.

[Amalalharbi]

((Thus did the (generations) before them say! But all that they did was of no profit to them))

((Nay, the evil results of their Deeds overtook them. And the wrong-doers of this (generation)- the evil results of their Deeds will soon

overtake them (too), and they will never be able to frustrate (Our Plan))

((Know they not that Allah enlarges the provision or restricts it, for any He pleases? Verily, in this are Signs for those who believe!))

((Say: "O my Servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah: for Allah forgives all sins: for

He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful))

(("Turn ye to our Lord (in repentance) and bow to His (Will), before the Penalty comes on you: after that ye shall not be helped))

Surah Az-Zumar

[the repenter13]

Don't lie to yourself. Do you know that there are people who spend their whole lives being strong Muslims dedicating their entire lives to god, but at the last moment they mess up once and they die a kafir and go to hell forever. Do you think it's fair that the prophet and his companions lived in a time when there was no fitna like today?. They lived with the prophet of course they had an advantage. And they were promised heaven. What about us?. God does not live all his servants equally. Just no that. If god loved you he would have created a permanent hell. The fact that he gives you blessing is just a manifestation of his power. He does it because he can. Basically were gods puppets and we have no choice. God hated me from day one. I wasted 10 years of my life because of him. And now he's going to burn me forever. Don't fool yourself. You may end up in hell and not even know it. God created everything right?. Even the devil himself. So who's really evil here?.

[Supernova]

Dear Lord !

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[RisingLight]

After many years of trial and hardship I finally got angry at god and finally broke down. And of course god punished me severely and now my life is literally over!. My Iman has been completely sucked out dry from my heart. I have no emotion anymore. I pens my days sinning all day intentionally and I'm a literal puppet. The devil has won over me. And now I'm an actual devil myself. I can't listen to Quran or hear anything about Islam. I know I'm going to hell forever and there is no hope. I could literally kill drone and not feel a thing. I was cursed ever since I was born and who's fault is that?. I regret ever being Muslim in the first place because it led to my destruction. So just wanted to share that.

Brother I feel the same as you so let me give you an advice from one who really understands what you going through
If nobody is agaisnt you being a muslim,and you can pray freerly,then start praying night salah and fajr everyday,at least these two salah at first,they are the receipe to success
Know that if you continue sinning intentionally that wont bring you closer to Allah.So please stop doing that
I know many people may have told you to be patient but there is no other choice really.Time will pass anyway,so just try to be strong.Dont let shaytan win.If you fight you may win,if you dont you are already lost
I will make a duaa for you I hope you start fighting again
Peace be with you..

- - - Updated - - -
nvm your situation is worst than I thought...

[the repenter13]

You don't understand. I can't be Muslim anymore. God doesn't want me to anymore. No matter what I do now I'm doomed. the reason I sin is because I'm trying to have as much fun before I die. I'm going to hell forever so I don't know what else to do now. This really sucks!!!!!!.

[Supernova]

uh huh..

[the repenter13]

Whatever...

[RisingLight]

Who said you cant? You are muslim already.You believe Allah is real and there is no God except him.So you are still a muslim.
Well as far as I can see you arent having fun otherwise you wouldnt come here.You know yourself sinning brings nothing good
I know its super hard but try to do what i said and you will see the change,I promise

- - - Updated - - -

You don't understand. I can't be Muslim anymore. God doesn't want me to anymore. No matter what I do now I'm doomed. the reason I sin is because I'm trying to have as much fun before I die. I'm going to hell forever so I don't know what else to do now. This really sucks!!!!!!.

Who said you cant? You are muslim already.You believe Allah is real and there is no God except him.So you are still a muslim.
Well as far as I can see you arent having fun otherwise you wouldnt come here.You know yourself sinning brings nothing good
I know its super hard but try to do what i said and you will see the change,I promise

[anatolian]

You are just mentally confused now. You just need treatment. Then you'll be fine.

[the repenter13]

All of the last 10 years I spent religiously devout. Now it all goes to waste. This is not a loving God. We were created for hell. God could have forgiven Adam and Eve and kept them in heaven. But no he decided to throw the out and threaten mankind with hell. Heck god could have made everyone go to heaven. But for some reason he creates an eternal hell. Why?. All these years I thought being Muslim was an honour and something great. In reality it's nothing but self destruction.

[the repenter13]

Who said you cant? You are muslim already.You believe Allah is real and there is no God except him.So you are still a muslim.
Well as far as I can see you arent having fun otherwise you wouldnt come here.You know yourself sinning brings nothing good
I know its super hard but try to do what i said and you will see the change,I promise

- - - Updated - - -



Who said you cant? You are muslim already.You believe Allah is real and there is no God except him.So you are still a muslim.
Well as far as I can see you arent having fun otherwise you wouldnt come here.You know yourself sinning brings nothing good
I know its super hard but try to do what i said and you will see the change,I promise

You don't understand. Simply believing in God does not mean I'm Muslim. Satan believes in God but he's a kafir. I can't pray or be Muslim if I want to. I'm no different than the devil.

[Amalalharbi]

Do you know that the fire has seven gates and the heaven has eight gates , mercy from my Lord? if anyone said no God but Allah, Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah, he is one of the people of Paradise no matter what he did, except to share with Allah something else

Do you think that you are the only one who is going through fitna

the prophet and his companions do you really know what happened to them


you just have to calm down and be one of the people of paradise Allah's mercy upon you is even greater than your mercy upon your self .

- - - Updated - - -

A man asked Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal, the man said when you feel comfortable? He said to him when I put my right foot in heaven

[the repenter13]

All of that fine and dandy. But it's too late for me. My fate is sealed. There's no place for me in heaven. I used to love talking about heaven. But now I hate it because it makes me feel bad that I'll never enter. I only have three options now. Either I kill myself. Have as much fun until I die. or kill a bunch of people. That's it. I wish I could go back in time but I can't. The damage has been done.

[the repenter13]

Perhaps I'm the brother of satan

[the repenter13]

I was never loved. Never.

[the repenter13]

I lost this world and the next. I'm even human anymore.

[the repenter13]

Christian's, Hindus, Jews are better than me at this point. Nobody can help me now.

[Amalalharbi]

Easy, say no God but Allah Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah , and enjoy your life as you like , then we will meet with you in paradise in sha Allah

as long as you are a Muslim we can pray for you, you will see our prayer in your life but don't thank us when you see your life turn easy, thank us in paradise in sha Allah

[RisingLight]

You don't understand. Simply believing in God does nnot mean I'm Muslim. Satan believes in God but he's a kafir. I can't pray or be Muslim if I want to. I'm no different than the devil.

I cant pray too.I walk around with shattered shoes.Even this I am writing from an ipad that is not mine..But there is no other choice.If we follow shaytan we are doomed anyway.I say we should go through this a bit more and someday we will finish this and be victorious in shaa Allah
You arent alone brother

What do you suggest then that you should do? And how can I help you?

[MuslimInshallah]

Assalaamu alaikum Repenter,


(mildly) No one knows who is going to paradise, or the fire, and if the fire, for how long. So why discuss this? All we are likely to do is say incorrect things about something only God Knows. (smile) And God is very Loving and Kind.

Our task on this earth is to worship God. And our worship is to get to know Him. And we get to know Him by getting to know ourselves, and trying to develop ourselves into ever greater harmony with Him. To tune into His Beautiful Qualities. (smile) And hardship is part of the equation. You couldn't unfold and become the beautiful person that you have the potential to become without the struggle in this life (and you have those beautiful seeds- this is for sure).

(smile) Would the beautiful oak tree be the strong, majestic thing it is, if the acorn had not cracked open, sent forth frail shoots and roots that got nibbled on? And as it grew, would it have become what is was without being rained on, had wind blowing upon it, had sun shining on it...? (mildly) Sometimes the wind could have been quite rough with the little sapling. And sometimes the rain would have felt like drowning to the sapling, and sometimes the sun may have felt too strong... but all these things helped shape that sapling into the glorious oak, did they not?

(smile) Right now you are confused and buffeted about like a dandelion seed. You need to root somewhere. And perhaps you think that rooting in concrete seems like a good idea; (mildly) But is it?

Pleasure is like a will o' the wisp. It always beckons onwards promising happiness, but... (gently) You can never actually gain the promise of the will o' the wisp. You can only chase it. And it never leads you anywhere safe; just lost and wandering in a dangerous bog.

(gently) You sound like someone who feels betrayed. And you well may have been betrayed. (gently) I wish I could erase this pain from you. But becoming demonic is just the ultimate betrayal. Satan doesn't care about you. You just betray yourself... for nothing. You are worthy of more than this.

(gently) Every human being, no matter what he or she has done, can hope for God's Mercy. All that is needed is a sincere desire to become a better person, and that you start to make efforts in a positive direction, even though the efforts may be small, especially at first (and yes, you will stumble from time to time; we all do).

(smile) The darkest of people can become the greatest of beacons, you know. (smile) If you read the autobiography of Malcolm X (written by Alex Haley)... you will perhaps understand what I mean. Those who have the capacity for great wickedness, also have a capacity for great good. (smile) perhaps you might become a beautiful light for others who also are stumbling, in pain?

(smile) I pray so.


May Allah, the Wise, the Gentle, have Mercy on you.

[the repenter13]

I wish someone could help me but I don't think that's possible. So you don't pray at all?

[the repenter13]

Assalaamu alaikum Repenter,


(mildly) No one knows who is going to paradise, or the fire, and if the fire, for how long. So why discuss this? All we are likely to do is say incorrect things about something only God Knows. (smile) And God is very Loving and Kind.

Our task on this earth is to worship God. And our worship is to get to know Him. And we get to know Him by getting to know ourselves, and trying to develop ourselves into ever greater harmony with Him. To tune into His Beautiful Qualities. (smile) And hardship is part of the equation. You couldn't unfold and become the beautiful person that you have the potential to become without the struggle in this life (and you have those beautiful seeds- this is for sure).

(smile) Would the beautiful oak tree be the strong, majestic thing it is, if the acorn had not cracked open, sent forth frail shoots and roots that got nibbled on? And as it grew, would it have become what is was without being rained on, had wind blowing upon it, had sun shining on it...? (mildly) Sometimes the wind could have been quite rough with the little sapling. And sometimes the rain would have felt like drowning to the sapling, and sometimes the sun may have felt too strong... but all these things helped shape that sapling into the glorious oak, did they not?

(smile) Right now you are confused and buffeted about like a dandelion seed. You need to root somewhere. And perhaps you think that rooting in concrete seems like a good idea; (mildly) But is it?

Pleasure is like a will o' the wisp. It always beckons onwards promising happiness, but... (gently) You can never actually gain the promise of the will o' the wisp. You can only chase it. And it never leads you anywhere safe; just lost and wandering in a dangerous bog.

(gently) You sound like someone who feels betrayed. And you well may have been betrayed. (gently) I wish I could erase this pain from you. But becoming demonic is just the ultimate betrayal. Satan doesn't care about you. You just betray yourself... for nothing. You are worthy of more than this.

(gently) Every human being, no matter what he or she has done, can hope for God's Mercy. All that is needed is a sincere desire to become a better person, and that you start to make efforts in a positive direction, even though the efforts may be small, especially at first (and yes, you will stumble from time to time; we all do).

(smile) The darkest of people can become the greatest of beacons, you know. (smile) If you read the autobiography of Malcolm X (written by Alex Haley)... you will perhaps understand what I mean. Those who have the capacity for great wickedness, also have a capacity for great good. (smile) perhaps you might become a beautiful light for others who also are stumbling, in pain?

(smile) I pray so.


May Allah, the Wise, the Gentle, have Mercy on you.

The worst can become the best and best can become the good. But you never hear the best becoming the worst then becoming the best again. Im finished.

[Supernova]

Human Torch

[M.I.A.]

Ah.. if you were content with what you are, you would not feel the need to share..

So that is what you feel..

Usually the shame of a thing keeps us from doing it.

..or the fear of a thing.

People who are a lot more adherent than you or i..

Still struggle sometimes.

But prayer is extremely important..

I think even in todays world i am a fool to downplay its importance..

It will impose itself upon me sooner or later..

But i will pray tonight when i get home.

[the repenter13]

Assalaamu alaikum Repenter,


(mildly) No one knows who is going to paradise, or the fire, and if the fire, for how long. So why discuss this? All we are likely to do is say incorrect things about something only God Knows. (smile) And God is very Loving and Kind.

Our task on this earth is to worship God. And our worship is to get to know Him. And we get to know Him by getting to know ourselves, and trying to develop ourselves into ever greater harmony with Him. To tune into His Beautiful Qualities. (smile) And hardship is part of the equation. You couldn't unfold and become the beautiful person that you have the potential to become without the struggle in this life (and you have those beautiful seeds- this is for sure).

(smile) Would the beautiful oak tree be the strong, majestic thing it is, if the acorn had not cracked open, sent forth frail shoots and roots that got nibbled on? And as it grew, would it have become what is was without being rained on, had wind blowing upon it, had sun shining on it...? (mildly) Sometimes the wind could have been quite rough with the little sapling. And sometimes the rain would have felt like drowning to the sapling, and sometimes the sun may have felt too strong... but all these things helped shape that sapling into the glorious oak, did they not?

(smile) Right now you are confused and buffeted about like a dandelion seed. You need to root somewhere. And perhaps you think that rooting in concrete seems like a good idea; (mildly) But is it?

Pleasure is like a will o' the wisp. It always beckons onwards promising happiness, but... (gently) You can never actually gain the promise of the will o' the wisp. You can only chase it. And it never leads you anywhere safe; just lost and wandering in a dangerous bog.

(gently) You sound like someone who feels betrayed. And you well may have been betrayed. (gently) I wish I could erase this pain from you. But becoming demonic is just the ultimate betrayal. Satan doesn't care about you. You just betray yourself... for nothing. You are worthy of more than this.

(gently) Every human being, no matter what he or she has done, can hope for God's Mercy. All that is needed is a sincere desire to become a better person, and that you start to make efforts in a positive direction, even though the efforts may be small, especially at first (and yes, you will stumble from time to time; we all do).

(smile) The darkest of people can become the greatest of beacons, you know. (smile) If you read the autobiography of Malcolm X (written by Alex Haley)... you will perhaps understand what I mean. Those who have the capacity for great wickedness, also have a capacity for great good. (smile) perhaps you might become a beautiful light for others who also are stumbling, in pain?

(smile) I pray so.


May Allah, the Wise, the Gentle, have Mercy on you.

I wanna Love god and be religious again but i think it's too late for that.

[RisingLight]

Yes I dont,because I cant.I have a though life.But I will try to start doing the night prayer only,secretly.I wish you do the same

[*charisma*]

So what are your issues exactly? I only see a rant. If you want a solution, then you have to outline for us your actual problem and be open to finding a solution. Otherwise, what's the point?

[mslm]

It's never too late for Allah; this is just you being depressed and overwhelmed by your sins, which Allah can forgive if you sit down and sincerely ask. When you do so, and I insist that you do, consider that Allah sees you as having taken a step closer to him, so he's taken a mile closer to you. After this, since you're in the habit of it, you'll probably commit another sin soon thereafter. Go repent again, like before. Even if you were to sin 100 times a day, as long as you came back and were sincere in your repentance and looked to get better each time, Allah will guide and help you. Now go.

[MuslimInshallah]

The worst can become the best and best can become the good. But you never hear the best becoming the worst then becoming the best again. Im finished.

Assalaamu alaikum again Repenter,


(gently) Perhaps this was the problem? You thought you were the best... but were you? (mildly) Have not terrible tyrants believed themselves to be the best of humanity?

(smile) Your situation now is far better than it was, it seems to me. Now you know yourself to be a weak and sin-prone human being. Could you ever believe yourself to be superior to other sinners after this? Could you now have compassion and love for others who have slipped? Do you not understand things about yourself and others that were not clear to you before, when you believed yourself to be so good?

(gently) When we think ourselves to be the best, we are courting disaster. When we know ourselves to be nothing without the Grace of God... (smile) then the horizon opens.

(smile) Try to be gentle with yourself. Perhaps pray one prayer a day to start with. Perhaps you can find one small thing you can change for the better- and stick to it. (smile) Trying to do everything all in one go, would be like going on a sudden and severe diet after becoming severely overweight; the diet could kill you. (smile) You have those beautiful seeds in you. You have strength. Just start slowly, and try to avoid doing overly much; going to extremes breeds hypocrisy. (smile) Do what you can manage on a difficult day- but stick to it like a limpet.

(gently) The struggle to get ever closer to Allah is a lifelong journey. There are hardships and all sorts of pitfalls all along the way. (smile) But as long as you continue to put one foot in front of the other and inch your way towards Him... there is great hope for you. (smile) Even when you stumble from time to time. Just get up, wash your cuts and scrapes, and keep on doing what you can.


May Allah, the Generous, the Subtle, have Mercy on us all.

[Amalalharbi]

Now that you have calmed down and you want the Paradise as well as us, Paradise are levels and Allah knows your heart's faith and certainty He knows at any level is your place but your actions can not reach that level so He puts you in these difficulties to be patient and raise you up to your level in Paradise, difficulties in this life is one of our bad deeds Allah wants to purify us, if you want a good life Try to repair your own for the best always. Allah said in surah An Nahl 97((Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer – We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do))

and Allah said in surah An Nisa 147(( What would Allah do with your punishment if you are grateful and believe? And ever is Allah Appreciative and Knowing.))

[the repenter13]

Now that you have calmed down and you want the Paradise as well as us, Paradise are levels and Allah knows your heart's faith and certainty He knows at any level is your place but your actions can not reach that level so He puts you in these difficulties to be patient and raise you up to your level in Paradise, difficulties in this life is one of our bad deeds Allah wants to purify us, if you want a good life Try to repair your own for the best always. Allah said in surah An Nahl 97((Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer – We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do))

and Allah said in surah An Nisa 147(( What would Allah do with your punishment if you are grateful and believe? And ever is Allah Appreciative and Knowing.))

But isn't it too late for me?. I mean the punishment already came to me. Now what?.

[Cptn._.Mario]

. You realise the state you're in, a dark place. So make dua and ask for a sign that he's still watching over you. Don't think he has abandoned you. He's the most merciful.

- - - Updated - - -

But isn't it too late for me?. I mean the punishment already came to me. Now what?.

Blessings can come too. It's never too late until you die.

[eesa the kiwi]

But isn't it too late for me?. I mean the punishment already came to me. Now what?.

You're still breathing aren't you

Snap out of this foolishness and turn back to Allah. This line of thinking is several different kinds of stupid. Allah forgives all sins to the one who repents. Who exactly do you think you are to claim otherwise?

[the repenter13]

You're still breathing aren't you

Snap out of this foolishness and turn back to Allah. This line of thinking is several different kinds of stupid. Allah forgives all sins to the one who repents. Who exactly do you think you are to claim otherwise?

It's because I've been blind for the last year and I did so much sins and I spent all my time trying to get rich. Because I was sick for so long and I tried accomplish something in this world. I was angry with God and I said a lot of evil things. Then god punished so severe that all of my dreams are over. I injured my neck severely and Im stuck on my couch in pain. No school, work and severely depressed. And plus I feel hopeless and lost my Iman. And I read a lot of verses in the Quran that says I'm doomed. And I've seen dreams that say I'm going to die. Will god still forgive me after what I did?. I feel hopeless.

[Ann Onn]

The problem that you have failed to understand is that this world is temporary and we are here to give a test. The ones loved the most by Allah are the ones who are tested the most. It is out of the question to compare our adversities with those of the Prophets of Allah. Can you bear being put in the stomach of a whale? Can you bear being left to die by your own brothers? Can you bear being subjected to imprisonment without being guilty for 40 years? Can you bear leaving your someone as loved as your new born son and wife in a desert with no food or water? Can you bear having to slaughter someone you love? All without question Allah? You say there was no fitna back then. My brother, back then there was no concept of Islam, therefore Allah had to keep sending Messengers to remind the people of it, that is the extent to which people would lose faith. But the knowledge has been made complete to us and these Messengers are the examples we need to turn to when in need of guidance and patience.

I do not speak without experience. I come from a practicing family. Among my siblings and cousins, I always considered myself the cursed one. I am considered the black sheep of the family and my family members accuse me of sins that I have not committed. I am told to look at my cousins and siblings and learn from then when in truth the family knows of nothing that goes on behind their backs. Furthermore, all my life plans were ruined due to circumstances and no matter what amount of patience I practice something in my life keeps going wrong. Many times I found myself saying, what is the point of turning to Allah when no one respects me, nothing in life goes the way I want it to. How come others who have no or little faith are doing better than I am. Shall I just give up and enjoy this world sinning as according to the people around me, I am a bad person and God is upset with me? No. This is my test and I have to give it. I have spent most of my life searching for happiness but I have not yet found it. For the past three months I have been in a terrible situation and I gave up on life. But that is not the answer to my solutions. I need to endure these tests till the day I die. No matter how painful everything is, and BELIEVE ME, I know the pain. For the past three months I have been waking up every morning crying and begging Allah to end the pain. But it is still there. That does not mean Allah has cursed me, it means He loves hearing the voice of His creation and one day He will show me and you what all this suffering, or curse as you call it, was worth.

All you need to do is turn to Him, and ask Him to forgive you. And since He created you, He will. Keep reciting surahs from the Quran to protect yourself against the whispers of Shaytan for surely he will give you many logic against my words as you read. Trust me, I have hit rock bottom in life and I choose the path of Allah and tawakul in Him, and that is what strengthens me when I fall. Every negative thought is by Satan and your words are soaked in negativity.

Allah loves those who turn back to him. No matter how much you sin, it is never too late to ask him for forgiveness.

[Abz2000]

Now that you've told everyone how you believe you became a human "devil" (satan?) Please do come back with your recovery story then we'll all know how you went from being more a part of the problem to more a part of the solution - that story will be more encouraging after the previous pacifying narration of experiences (pacifying in the fact that i know i'm not the only one who sometimes gets dragged into situations where one wonders how he/she'll ever climb back out into decency, dignity, self respect, and re-develop a will to act passionately and energetically against injustice, so the next world - ETERNITY - feels less scary again and the world which we will leave our kids in is more just and sane than it was in our age of turmoil and confusion so that they don't end up suffering worse than the people of this generation did.

[the repenter13]

The problem that you have failed to understand is that this world is temporary and we are here to give a test. The ones loved the most by Allah are the ones who are tested the most. It is out of the question to compare our adversities with those of the Prophets of Allah. Can you bear being put in the stomach of a whale? Can you bear being left to die by your own brothers? Can you bear being subjected to imprisonment without being guilty for 40 years? Can you bear leaving your someone as loved as your new born son and wife in a desert with no food or water? Can you bear having to slaughter someone you love? All without question Allah? You say there was no fitna back then. My brother, back then there was no concept of Islam, therefore Allah had to keep sending Messengers to remind the people of it, that is the extent to which people would lose faith. But the knowledge has been made complete to us and these Messengers are the examples we need to turn to when in need of guidance and patience.

I do not speak without experience. I come from a practicing family. Among my siblings and cousins, I always considered myself the cursed one. I am considered the black sheep of the family and my family members accuse me of sins that I have not committed. I am told to look at my cousins and siblings and learn from then when in truth the family knows of nothing that goes on behind their backs. Furthermore, all my life plans were ruined due to circumstances and no matter what amount of patience I practice something in my life keeps going wrong. Many times I found myself saying, what is the point of turning to Allah when no one respects me, nothing in life goes the way I want it to. How come others who have no or little faith are doing better than I am. Shall I just give up and enjoy this world sinning as according to the people around me, I am a bad person and God is upset with me? No. This is my test and I have to give it. I have spent most of my life searching for happiness but I have not yet found it. For the past three months I have been in a terrible situation and I gave up on life. But that is not the answer to my solutions. I need to endure these tests till the day I die. No matter how painful everything is, and BELIEVE ME, I know the pain. For the past three months I have been waking up every morning crying and begging Allah to end the pain. But it is still there. That does not mean Allah has cursed me, it means He loves hearing the voice of His creation and one day He will show me and you what all this suffering, or curse as you call it, was worth.

All you need to do is turn to Him, and ask Him to forgive you. And since He created you, He will. Keep reciting surahs from the Quran to protect yourself against the whispers of Shaytan for surely he will give you many logic against my words as you read. Trust me, I have hit rock bottom in life and I choose the path of Allah and tawakul in Him, and that is what strengthens me when I fall. Every negative thought is by Satan and your words are soaked in negativity.

Allah loves those who turn back to him. No matter how much you sin, it is never too late to ask him for forgiveness.

"And of the people is he who worships Allah on an edge. If he is touched by good, he is reassured by it; but if he is struck by trial, he turns on his face [to the other direction]. He has lost [this] world and the Hereafter. That is what is the manifest loss."

It's over for me there's no reason for me to live anymore. The verse is clear and I fit the verse completely.

[Supernova]

​Zzzzzzz

[happymuslim]

But isn't it too late for me?. I mean the punishment already came to me. Now what?.

I don’t know why you keep telling yourself this. You act as if everything is sealed from this point on but bro, you ain’t dead yet! Whilst your still alive you hold something very powerful, this is your free will. I don’t know what kind of inner demons your fighting from within but I’ll tell you don’t ever reach such a point of despair, it’s dangerous.

Just listen to what all these nice people are telling you, it’s not over yet. Your name is a paradox to this thread. And your name is what you should do. Repent, and challenge your inner self that your going to somehow change this bad attitude of yours.

You’re somehow acting like somebody has forced you to act in this manner and that you can see your future with your very own two physical eyes. Well I’ll tell you you can’t! And until you take a courage instead of hiding in this despair, your handing it to yourself.

From what I am seeing, I feel as though you believe in god still, and that your name is who you can be. Don’t ever belittle your belief in god, it’s something a lot of people don’t have. Your lucky, there’s something within, these are seeds. Plant them brother.

And may I ask? If you were really doomed to hell, wouldn’t you be dead at this point? Maybe the fact that your still alive and that you actually reached out to this forum is your awakening, and a sign that you still have a chance. Think about it..[emoji848]

[Eric H]

Greetings and peace be with you repenter13;

I wanna Love god and be religious again.

Your intentions are right, you just have to do something.

but i think it's too late for that.

You are still breathing, so you can start doing something today. Start with a prayer for repentance, your user name says it all.

Allah can only be merciful to the people who need mercy, so never give up hope in the mercy and forgiveness of Allah.

Blessings,
Eric

[Amalalharbi]

Greetings and peace be with you repenter13;


Your intentions are right, you just have to do something.



You are still breathing, so you can start doing something today. Start with a prayer for repentance, your user name says it all.

Allah can only be merciful to the people who need mercy, so never give up hope in the mercy and forgiveness of Allah.

Blessings,
Eric

what is your religion

[lif]

pray for forgiveness and indeed the most merciful will forgive you i pray to Allah SWT that he will bring out the deen and iman that is still in you’re heart

[rozyred]

Salam Dear.

Confession of your sins is shown in your description. This is a good sign. This shows that your faith is yet pure inside. So all you have to do is that repent for it. You are neither an Evil nor cursed by Allah. He is the Most Forgiving. We'll pray 4 u too.

"They would press you for evil sooner than for good, though there have already gone by before them exemplary punishments. Indeed your Lord is forgiving to mankind despite their wrongdoing, and indeed your Lord is severe in retribution." [Quran:13:6]

[rainydays]

Salam, I came across this thread and would like to share with you that, you dont have to feel the way you do. Right now youre not at your best and you know this too. Just remember that God (Allah) is the same god you fell in love with when you learned what Islam is all about, He Will not give up on you. Just say a prayer and have a little hope. Hope is the solution, and dua. Request Him to Help and Comfort you and dont overthink things.

also I'm sure in some way you are a good person inside and out, dont let the evil spirits get what they are jelous of. You show goodness and repentant self, and only God Allah and His Angels want good and the best for you as well. That is some advice I can give here for you and myself. thanks

[rozyred]

Salam.

Another video that can help you.

https://youtu.be/97GFujVTk4k

[Islamopeace]

Aren't there various methods of redemption, brother? Correct me if i'm wrong but I believe there are some actions that can lead to ones redemption in the eyes of god and avoid the eternal hellfire

[Sasa]

Allah forgives ALL sins except shirk.

[cinnamonrolls1]

How do you know ur going to hell? Were you told personally or something? Dude you have to chill. Repent and try your hardest. If you stumble get back up again. You're not worse than the devil, and you're still a muslim at the end of the day. I dont know what you mean by "fun" but you can find halal alternatives. Eg if you drink you can always try non alcoholic beer and try and use that to wean yourself off of it :/