format_quote Originally Posted by
anatolian
Can a woman travel where ever she wants if her wali/ husband permits?
If we're going to talk about what a woman can and can't do, the reality of it is that a woman can do whatever she wants :D but whether it is permitted in Islam or not is another question.
From my understanding, even with her husband's permission, a woman is not allowed to travel without her husband or mahrem. Islamic rulings aside and assessing the situation further, I personally don't believe that there is an absolute necessity to travel to see her parents at this time if it is against her husband's wishes; it's just something she
wants to do. Even hajj is excused for women if there is no mahrem available to travel with them. So considering the importance of this travel in the general scheme of things, it's not worth causing the husband any hardship if there is no alternative at the moment. I honestly believe when it comes to these situations where immediate families are involved, both spouses should always try to make accommodations because we only have one of each parent and they are irreplaceable. This is something which should be taken into consideration when anyone is looking into marriage if family is important to them. I understand that sometimes even then it isn't always perfect and things don't go as planned, so in those times we have to be patient and perhaps Allah opens doors for us that we didn't expect.
format_quote Originally Posted by
Calmate
The problem is that maby her family cannot come to visit us. I dont want to lend money. I asked her to be more patient.
If this is important to her ask her to be patient but also give a solution so that she can have something to look forward to. Maybe in her mind she thinks there will not be an opportunity for her. I'm not understanding why you wouldn't be able to have her family come over? You don't have to lend them money, you can make it a gift for your wife to have her parents there with her for a bit.
format_quote Originally Posted by
Calmate
But what if she go again to visit her family without my permission. How Islam deal with this situation?
How would she be able to go on her own? Does she support herself? Try to speak to her kindly. Are her parents requesting to see her or is this something she just wants to do on her own? If being patient with her and speaking kindly doesn't work then just don't share a bed with her and see if that has an effect? This is what is prescribed in Quran for disobeying wives. Anyways keep making du'a, and try to discuss it with her but also find a solution. If this is her only flaw then maybe visiting her family is really important to her so do put in the effort to make something happen. I might be incorrect but it doesn't seem that you are very close to her family which probably adds to the situation. May Allah ease your affairs and guide your marriage ameen.