What is backbiting?

[Studentofdeed]

If someone has done really bad to you or has no remorse? Are you allowed to complain to your intimate close friends for advice and such?
Is it permissible to say this person is a liar if the person lied to you or if destroyed your life , are you allowed to say this man is horrible?

[ZeeshanParvez]

It is best to forgive. If you forgive, Allaah will raise your status in this world. Do not take my word for it. Read the following authentic hadith:


Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) as saying:

Charity does not in any way decrease the wealth and the servant who forgives, Allah adds to his respect, and the one who shows humility, Allah elevates him in the estimation (of the people).

[Sahih Muslim]


Also keep the following Qur'aanic Verse in mind


"... Let them pardon and forgive. Do you not love that Allah should forgive you? And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."

[al-Noor, 24:22]



Having said that, we have the following Verse in the Qur'aan:



Allah does not like the public mention of evil except by one who has been wronged. And ever is Allah Hearing and Knowing.

[Qur'aan 4:148]


Imaam al-Tabari mentions several interpretations of the scholars for this Verse in his tafsiir

One is that if someone has been wronged, they are allowed to make dua against the person.

Another is that if someone has wronged a person he can inform of the wrong that was done to him.


My personal advice is that you forgive and reap the rewards in both worlds. If you are like me, and cannot forgive, then telling other people will not do you much good.

Make dua against the person. Remember that you are not to transgress in your dua.

[xboxisdead]

It is best to forgive. If you forgive, Allaah will raise your status in this world. Do not take my word for it. Read the following authentic hadith:


Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) as saying:

Charity does not in any way decrease the wealth and the servant who forgives, Allah adds to his respect, and the one who shows humility, Allah elevates him in the estimation (of the people).

[Sahih Muslim]


Also keep the following Qur'aanic Verse in mind


"... Let them pardon and forgive. Do you not love that Allah should forgive you? And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."

[al-Noor, 24:22]



Having said that, we have the following Verse in the Qur'aan:



Allah does not like the public mention of evil except by one who has been wronged. And ever is Allah Hearing and Knowing.

[Qur'aan 4:148]


Imaam al-Tabari mentions several interpretations of the scholars for this Verse in his tafsiir

One is that if someone has been wronged, they are allowed to make dua against the person.

Another is that if someone has wronged a person he can inform of the wrong that was done to him.


My personal advice is that you forgive and reap the rewards in both worlds. If you are like me, and cannot forgive, then telling other people will not do you much good.

Make dua against the person. Remember that you are not to transgress in your dua.

Al-hamdolillah! Al-hamdolillah I am Muslim! I have to be honest....if someone wronged me and I do not dua against that person, wallahi my heart will explode. That is really a stress reliever for me! Thank you so much brother for the information.

[Studentofdeed]

So it is allowed if someone oppressed me in a such a bad way that I am allowed to complain to complain to my mother or friends saying that person is bad? I mean lot of scholars are saying you can not utter statements like that person is bad which I personally think is just silly. You have been wronged and you can only complain to a judge? I have to complain or I will become depressed unable to talk about my problems?

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[ZeeshanParvez]

So it is allowed if someone oppressed me in a such a bad way that I am allowed to complain to complain to my mother or friends saying that person is bad? I mean lot of scholars are saying you can not utter statements like that person is bad which I personally think is just silly. You have been wronged and you can only complain to a judge? I have to complain or I will become depressed unable to talk about my problems?

Yes, you can talk to your mother. If you want to be really safe then just don't mention the name of the person. In that case, you haven't specified the person. When you do not specify the person then it is not backbiting according to all of the scholars of truth.

[Abz2000]

Backbiting is when you unjustly bite into a person's back whilst they are unaware - then gnaw off a chunk of flesh and munch on it, having disabled or semi-disabled them, without actually getting true justice done.
Sometimes it's fuzzy though - for instance, the people in power in society are not judging justly in Allah's sight or are a part of the conspiracy themselves, yet you know you need to warn people of a danger - speak whilst knowing that Allah :swt: will hold everybody to account justly.
It is haram to spread evil gossip in society without the will to see justice in Allah's sight done.

[Studentofdeed]

Jazakallah brother. I feel better. May allah give you al firdaous