format_quote Originally Posted by
urkahnkhan
I have been there couple of times and I exactly know the feeling hence I feel as the right person to advice you on this subject.
As weird as it may sound don't leave this girl to dry just like that and go back to her and make dawah to her little by little and also remember to make dua for her in the same time and stay with her for another couple of months up to 6-9 months and remember to constantly give her dawah silently and in good manner.
Insha-allah you can save her from hell-fire and keep her as yours. Don't let your woman go that easily and this is something that I have learned from.
Don't take Islam as your own but share it with her because this is a blessing from Allah and saving the ones you love is one of the best deeds you can do. SAVE YOUR GIRL and when you have given her enough time of dua and she dosen't want to accept then you can leave her
Jazakhallahu Khair brother... I understand what you are saying and i tried that too.I have tried to make dawah for her,i wouldnt leave like that cuz then that would be extremely selfish from my side.From the big love she had for me there is no problem for me being a practising muslim.She would be ok with that.But thats not enough.For how long? Who assures me that she wont wake up one day and dumb me,because i wouldnt want music in the house,animals,pictures etc.She says covering the hair is stupid,and while she agrees to cover the body she would never cover her hair.Its been 7 years i am struggling to leave the country and be independent so i can practise Islam in peace.After all i have been through i dont want to end up with this.What if one day she thinks hajj is stupid,or sadaqa is stupid,or not taking loan is stupid.How can i live like that. You understand what i mean?
I know what you may be thinking now,maybe i should have been more patient in giving her dawah.But there are reasons why i didnt:
1. i am not knowledgeable to give proper dawah
2. if i gave dawah for 9 more months and by that time she isnt muslim but more in love with me it would be way worst to leave her
3. i am afraid i would love her too. Nobody has ever loved me the way she did,not even my kafir family,so i would love her just cuz she was always puting me before her.And then I would do one haram here one haram there,whatever she wanted.I want to put Allah before everything else,cuz i dont know how much time i may left and my good deeds can be counted with fingers
JazakhAllahu Khair for the support and your reply brother.It is enough for me to know that you understand me and know what i feel.
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format_quote Originally Posted by
xboxisdead
You know...I need to take break...seriously.
What about the already excellent Muslim sisters out there who is looking for such a man. Before you go ahead and be the white knight in a horse with a long spear to save a woman (which you can never do...guidance is from Allah alone)...why not focus on making sure ALL the Muslim sisters (already muslim) who are not married and she is looking for a man to have her married and have her have children of her own. The other sisters who do not want to get married that s her choice..she doe not have too.
I dont know where and how to find these excellent muslims.I dont have muslim parents or relatives to help me.And the muslims that are here,are way more pious than me,dont have wives themselves,firstly because there are not enough muslimah here,and second because this is a poor country and we dont have enough money to support them.And since I always wanted to leave (and i will soon finally in shaa Allah) for the sake of Allah,then my only choice is internet.But most of the muslims ive met on internet,want very knowledgeable guys who have money,and even those who have agreed that i go meet their father as soon as i am able to,accepted a proposal before i even met their father.Am not complaining,i kept it halal and elhamdulillah it happened,but really i dont know where to find these excellent
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format_quote Originally Posted by
Al Khorasani
Asalamu Alaikum
Alaikum Salam...Ameen,you too my dear brother :)..